A funny Q-tip story, a few other things and a fantastic movie with a great message.

A funny Q-tip story, a few other things and a fantastic movie with a great message.

Shel R.1 Comment

Hey there loves!

So, the kids and I went to see the Harlem Globetrotters a few days ago, and we absolutely enjoyed the show.

It was hilarious.

It was entertaining.

It was amazing.

For those who don’t know who or what they are – what rock have you been hiding under?

YouTube some of their videos and watch them play. Watch them act. Watch them do tricks. Watch them make you laugh.

They play Basketball – but they have fun with it. They joke around. The tease each other. They tease the team they’re playing. They interact with their fans. They give prizes and gifts. They do all kinds of things on the court.

My mom, my daughter and I – have been to one of their games a few years ago, but my older son didn’t want to go, and my little guy was too little to understand it. Now that he’s 9-years-old and knows all about sports, it was more exciting to take him as well. My kids had so much fun as they yelled, cheered, clapped, and truly enjoyed that night. ❤️

Many arenas where they play – allow kids to bring their own Basketballs to be signed at the end of the game – (which is what my kids did), or they can buy a Globetrotters basketball / Souvenir at the games – and have them signed.

I laughed when many of the kids yelled, “6-7” – when the Globetrotters score reached 67.

My little dude was upset though because a lot of the kids who were sitting down by the court seats – were called onto the court and given gifts and souvenirs, so he felt some kind of way, but I told him that the kids sitting around him – or further away from the court – weren’t getting anything, so he wasn’t the only one.

However – when we were down by the court after the show – getting autographs, we were almost done and had a few more to get – as we walked over to the star of the show that night (Thunder).

One of the players (Spice) – came running under the rope they set up to separate the crowd and the players. She made moves like she was about to play Basketball with my little guy, and she ended up taking off her headband, putting it around his head and joking with him.

He was SO EXCITED! I was SO happy he finally got something, as he yelled out, “I didn’t think I was going to get anything from any of the players”. It made my mama heart smile. 😁 She will probably never see this – but THANK YOU, SPICE!!!! You made his night special.

I took more videos than photos, but we had such a great time, and my kids can’t wait to go again.

We asked for Spice’s autograph, but because it was time for the players to leave, she said they took her marker away, but she’d be more than happy to do a photo. So, we did that. My Elijah took photos with most of the players, but my Kailani – she didn’t want pictures. She hates photos these days unless she’s taking them herself.

We laughed when player (Thunder) told her she’s not getting her ball back unless she gets in the photo, but he did give it back to her.

They are so down to earth and will do almost anything to make a fan happy. Go see them if you ever have the chance.

*****

In other news – Senior assassin starts next semester – which I believe – is a few weeks away, but my daughter’s friend brought two gel pellet guns to school today and asked me to put them in my car to hold on to them. One for her, and one for my daughter.

They’re taking this seriously, and I can’t wait until it starts – to see what Seniors get other seniors, what kind of cool gel guns they have, and where they catch their classmates out and about. 😁

I think I mentioned before that the only rules are – they can’t get their classmates at work, or at school.

Anywhere in the town – or out and about – is fair game!

I’m excited to see how much fun my daughter and her friends have during this little Senior war going on soon.

Anyone else do Senior assassin in high school or have teens ready to do it?

Unfortunately, I don’t even remember that being a thing when I was in high school. I missed out.

*****

Oh. Let me tell you a funny story before I forget.

My daughter was in the walk-in clinic about a month ago because she couldn’t hear.

Her ears were clogged with wax, so they ended up flushing a good amount out, and they told her NOT to use Q-TIPS – like she had been doing. They said it would push the wax further into her ear, and that Q-tips are only for the outside of the ears and to clean around them.

I told her not to use Q-tips so many times, but she didn’t listen. This week – when she kept telling me she couldn’t hear again and wanted to go back to the walk-in clinic – I waited to see if it would get better, but it didn’t.

We went last night.

When the doctor looked in her ears, one was clear and the other – had wax in it.

As the CNA flushed the wax out, she noticed something else in there, so she called the doctor in to have a look.

Sure enough – there was a good chunk of part of the cotton of a Q-tip – balled up and stuck inside my daughter’s ear. 😶 The CNA let me have a look, and I was able to see it deep down in there. Oh kid, what the hell?! lol. So, it took three big bottles of their solution – to spray all in there and finally break down the cotton enough – to flush some of it out, flush the rest to the near surface, and for the doctor to be able to go in there with a small tool and grab the rest.

They got it out, but it took a good hour, and I hope my daughter learned her lesson this time about Q-tips.

PLEASE DON’T STICK ANY Q-TIPS INSIDE OF YOUR EARS, and any other small foreign objects for that matter! We laughed about it after. The CNA was having such a good time with it and she was laughing. I told her this is totally a story for a college party (as the CNA was only 21), and the doctor kind of giggled – kind of not.

Still, the CNA was awesome at breaking up most of it, as the doctor did 5 minutes of the work, and the CNA did the rest of it.

We also laughed when I had to pee, and I asked where the bathroom was, and then asked what room we’re in, so when I come back – I can easily find the room. She said, “Room 15”. When I left the bathroom, I walked into room 15 – only to find a guy pacing back and forth with his back turned to me – (thankfully) – 🤣 and I quietly closed the door. I heard my daughter laughing with the CNA – which is the only way I knew she was in room 11 – and not 15.

When I told the CNA, she laughed so much and told me how sorry she was.

I told her, “At least the guy wasn’t naked, and at least he didn’t see me walk in on him”.

My daughter asked me if she’s my “problem child”. I giggled and told her, “No, but you’re definitely the one who gives me the funniest stories to tell!”.

Lord, help me!

What it’s like having a teenager daughter – be like……………………..

haha.

Before I get out of here because I really have nothing else right now –

I just wanted to take this time to talk to the moms out there.

It doesn’t matter if you’re a single mama, divorced, married, in a relationship – whatever.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, stressed, tired, exhausted, and feel like you’re not doing enough – when you do EVERYTHING for your household and your kids – if you have it all and for some reason, can’t find your happiness….PLEASE – PLEASE – watch the movie:

(MOM’S NIGHT OUT) – on Netflix.

It will make you think twice and make you appreciate and love everything you have, and it will help you realize that through the beautiful messes we go through every day, with everything life throws our way, and through all the chaos and noise – we have it good. We are blessed. We ARE enough and doing enough!

It’s such a great movie, and I found it on accident, but I needed to see it.

It made me laugh.

It made me cry.

I related to this movie so much, because sometimes – no matter how much I do for my kids – no matter how many bills get paid – no matter how many hours I put in at work so my kids and I can have it all …. I sometimes feel like I’m not doing enough. I feel like I should be doing more, or like I’m not enough for my kids.

Sometimes, I just need to feel like I can sit down and breath for a minute and I don’t get that time often.

Sometimes, I feel like nothing is going to get easier, and I get overwhelmed, tired, mentally and emotionally drained, and I feel like I failed in so many ways.

Life really does do its thing and makes us moms feel like we’re not good enough or like we messed up along the way in different areas of it. So, when I saw this movie and realized the cute and amazing message it gave – it made me feel better.

Life isn’t going to be perfect. Us moms aren’t going to be perfect, but – when we think we failed, or we could be better, do better – others may look at us and wish they had it together like we did. They wish they were doing or did have the things we did. Sometimes, we don’t know who is looking at our lives and thinking our lives are perfect – and we’re over here wanting to scream and trying to hold it together like glue that just doesn’t stick.

NEVER be jealous of anyone’s life – because you don’t know what other moms are dealing with, feeling, going through and they could be holding on by a little string as well.

This movie is great, and if you’re a mom – just sit down, pour a glass of wine when the kids are in bed, and give it a watch. It’s totally worth it and will make you realize that you’re not the only mom out there who is barely making it!

YOU’RE NOT FAILING, and even if your life is a mess right now – (like mine is) – it’s a beautiful mess, and if your kids are happy – (like mine are) – you’re doing a great job getting through it. 💕

YOU GOT THIS!!!!!

One of my favorite country singers (Trace Adkins) plays in it. He’s the big, bad biker dude “Bones”.

Without giving the movie away, there’s a part in there where Allyson tells Bones she feels like she’s failing, and he tells her, “I doubt God made a mistake giving your kids the mama he did!”. That made me feel good because a friend of mine once told me, “Shel, God don’t make mistakes! He knew who he wanted this baby’s mama to be!” – when I found out I was pregnant with my little guy, so I agree with that. God picks us moms for a good reason, and he knows that many of us are going to have a hard time, but we’re also strong enough to be moms and do this thing.

In the movie, one of the younger moms tells Allyson, “You have it all figured out”, and she smiles and tells her, “Not even a little bit!”. I agree with that. Same here, sista!

When people tell me they don’t know how I do it all by myself, I want to laugh and tell them, “I’m hanging on by a small – thin thread and I want to stand in a field somewhere and scream at the top of my lungs”.

My oldest would have been 25 if she were still alive.

My older son is almost 23.

My daughter will be 18 this year.

My little guy will be 10 this year…………….

And I still don’t have it all figured out, so I could relate to that and this entire movie.

Sometimes, through the madness – the sadness – the heartbreaks – the stress and drama – the crazy stories and moments we get to live through and tell (Like the Q-tip story above) – through the emotional and mental draining, the headaches, the wild moments that make us moms want to scream – the overwhelming feeling of not doing enough……………

There’s beauty in all of it, and when we really take the time to sit down, look at our happy kids and smile – we learn to cherish the good, the bad, the ugly and everything in between – that life takes us through.

So, give the movie a shot, and I hope you enjoy it as much as I did because the message in it – is great.

A little preview for you……………………

I believe it’s an older movie from 2014 I’ve read, but still a great one, and I think many moms all over will appreciate it.

I know I loved it!

To my mamas – and even the dads who feel like they’re not doing enough or feel overwhelmed and exhausted – you don’t have to be perfect. Just be there for your kids, make sure they’re happy, and make sure that you take a little bit of time for yourself once-in-a-while.

Just without all the craziness of what goes on in this movie. 😁

I have to run and grab my kids from school and go make plans for my older sons’ birthday.

He turns 23 in a few days.

I’m exhausted right now just thinking about it, but life goes on.

Love ya!

❤️Shel❤️

Forced Doctor visits and a great book!

Forced Doctor visits and a great book!

Shel R.2 Comments

It is 1:25 AM as I write this.

Insomnia really is a struggle.

I’ve been tossing and turning since 10 PM.

So, I got up and decided to jot a bit.

I have to be up to get ready for work at 4 AM, so this is probably a bad idea.

The good news, though?

I had to go see my doctor a few days ago, and he prescribed me a sleeping pill.

I still haven’t picked it up yet, but I plan to do that tomorrow from the Pharmacy.

He asked if I’ve tried things like going to bed later, reading before bed, listening to music, etc.

After I told him I’ve tried it all, he got to typing and told me what he was going to prescribe me and told me to try it to see if it helps. I shall let y’all know how that goes. 😊 It better help – because my sleep is all messed up, and as soon as I get to sleep, I can’t stay asleep.

So, let’s chat!

The doctor visit:

It was forced.

You know I don’t go to the doctor or hospital unless I absolutely have to.

The DMV kind of forced this one.

In 2016, I had a little medical emergency and woke up in the E.R.

Since then – the DMV liked to play this little game of, “We have to check on you and make sure you’re safe to drive”. I promise you – there was no drugs or alcohol involved, and I blame lack of sleep, exhaustion, burnout and a long day – when this happened. Nonetheless – I was behind the wheel, and thankfully – I was in a parking lot when I passed out.

Again – we’re talking about almost a decade ago!

Serious shit, I know!

That was before I moved to Minnesota and my doctor back then – wrote it off as nothing more than a medical emergency and said I was good to go. They ran tests, they did blood work, and everything came back fine. I was told what I could do to stop it from happening again, and it’s been almost TEN YEARS since that day – without it ever happening again.

I also haven’t heard from the DMV in so many years, so imagine my surprise when I got a letter stating that my license would be cancelled if I didn’t go get ANOTHER form signed by my new doctor here in Minnesota – stating that I’m okay to drive. WTF. I was so aggravated, and I called my doctor’s office, but they couldn’t get me in until the 8th. No, that’s not going to work, and this is why!

I explained the situation to the lady who answered – and finally – she asked if I wanted to “come in and see him at 3 PM today”.

That was a few days ago.

I’ve had this doctor here in Minnesota for about a year 1/2 now.

He was amazing at getting me in, and he signed that paperwork right away – making sure to have his nurse fax it quickly to stop any actions against my license. He laughed about it and called it “absolutely ridiculous almost a decade later”.

THANK YOU!!!!!

THAT’S WHAT I SAID!!!!!

Okay, I understand it. I get that they have a job to do and they have to make sure everyone on the road is safe to be on the road, but A DECADE LATER??!!!!!! Still, we giggled about it, and he did what he had to do.

Once he finished the paperwork, I expected to thank him, tell him “Have a great day!”, and be on my way.

No!

My doctor had other plans.

He says, “Well, it’s great to see you, and since I have you here – and I haven’t seen you in a while, we should just go ahead and do a follow-up visit”. I laughed and told him, “This is why I don’t come here. You want to sit and talk about everything else that I didn’t come here for”. He laughed, and he knew I was joking, but I was also very much serious. Sir, I’m just trying to be on my way. 🤣

He asked a few questions about how I’ve been feeling, asked if I had any new changes in my health I’m concerned about, if I was getting enough rest – (no – because you just prescribed me sleeping meds). You know the answer to that! ha.

He asked a few other questions, and then he listened to my lungs / heart. He went over my lab results from the last time I had lab work done and told me everything looks great and asked me if I had any questions for him or anything I wanted to talk about.

Did I ask him if he could give me tummy tuck?! Yes. Yes, I did!!!!

I gave him my best look.

(Photo by S.P.M. on Pinterest)

He looked at me and smiled.

He told me, “If I’m being honest, would it be a benefit? Yes, but I don’t really think you need it. I think with enough slow and steady exercise, everything would tighten up on its own”.

No. That’s not what I’m trying to hear.

He continued and said if it’s something I really want to do, we can look into it, but there would be a process to go through. Seeing a dietician first, seeing a psychologist, and making sure I’m okay for it. I didn’t know I’d have to jump through so many hoops, and while I totally get the dietician part of it – I was confused about the Psych part.

I guess it’s because doctors and surgeons want to make sure that the person getting the tummy tuck – or whatever surgery they want – has realistic expectations from it, has a strong mindset for it, they’re mentally stable, and to prepare the person for the emotional challenges after the surgery.

Makes sense.

I told him, “Let’s do this!”. He put in a referral and said they’d call me in a week or so to talk to me and we’d go from there.

Maybe I don’t need it. I just have the typical “mommy tummy” as I call it, but I don’t like it, and I want it gone. It almost made me feel good when he said he didn’t think I needed it, but – I disagree. Maybe I’ll get into my workouts, see results and decide against it. Who knows?

Anyway, this adorably cute doctor of mine – finished up our visit, looked at me and told me, “Don’t be a stranger, okay?”. I laughed and told him, “Oh, I’m going to be a stranger. You know I don’t like this place. It’s not you. I just don’t like doctors and hospitals”. He laughed and told me, “I know”. I thanked him and went on my way.

My daughter was with me and she had me laughing so much when she asked, “Why did it sound like you were breaking up with the guy? You said – It’s not you…..”. 😁 I mean, it’s true. It’s not him. It’s me. If he wanted to meet up for coffee, or dinner – or a movie – then I would definitely not be a stranger, but in the professional doctor / patient setting, no thanks!

The man is very much married though, and I don’t break up marriages, so even then – it would be a no.

So – my license won’t be cancelled, and he basically told the DMV to stop bothering me – in his medical terms. lol. The tummy tuck thing? Possibly happening.

Other than that –

The book:

I just started reading this book I keep hearing SO MUCH about.

Women all over TIKTOK are talking about it, and all the emotions it brings out of them.

Some have cried talking about it. Some have been playfully mad talking about it. Some have been like, “What the hell, dude?”. It’s all over the TOK and it got me interested in reading this book that’s going viral.

This book so far – has made me smile. It has irritated me. It has made me smile again. It has made wonder why the hell Jaime is playing with emotions and playing both sides like he is, and then it made me wonder why the hell in the college years – “B” is playing with emotions and playing both sides like she is – and has me wondering WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON????????????????????????? WHY CAN’T THESE TWO FIGURE IT OUT?????????????????

First of all – the book starts off by saying on the inside:

“One day, whether you are 14, 28, or 65…you will stumble upon someone who will start a fire in you that cannot die. However – the saddest, most awful truth you will ever come to find – is – they are not always with whom we spend our lives”. – Beau Taplin.

I FELT THAT. It’s such a real quote.

But –

This book starts off with this Junior in high school – running with her best friend, and she accidently bumps into this cute Senior boy she says she saw first. It goes on to say, “Truth is – I lost the ability to do anything the minute I looked up at him. It was an unfamiliar, warm ache that spread through my chest as I used my hand to shield the sun streaming in behind his silhouette, just how you’d expect the first sip of Whiskey to feel”. She goes on to refer to this boy – as “Whiskey” since that day.

I don’t want to give the book away in case you want to read it, but you should totally check it out.

Pick up a copy or download it on Kindle – which is where I’m reading it now and give it a try. I recommend it!! He does end up liking her friend, so why is he texting “B” – telling her “Take a ride with me”. The book had me hooked the first few chapters, and eventually – while she’s in love with “Whiskey” – he’s supposed to be the boy she never sees again after high school – but…………………………….

Na. I can’t spoil it for you. Go read it. Seriously – it’s a great book so far, and I’ve been through some emotions myself reading this. I just got my daughter into it, and even she – is like “WHAT THE HELL?”. haha. She hates reading actual books, but this one – she’s really into as well. She has actually gotten way ahead of me.

She laughed in the car the other day when I was parked somewhere reading it, and on page 60 – I yelled out, “NO WAY!”. As I kept reading in shock, I yelled out again, “NNNOOOO WWAAAAYYY!”. 🙄🤣💕 There were two big shockers.

Anyway – get you the book and have a good read! Let me know what you think if you do.

I got this from GOOGLE:

  • Star-Crossed Lovers: Breck and Jamie’s story spans years, marked by undeniable chemistry but poor timing.
  • Addictive Connection: Readers describe feeling “intoxicated” by the story, mirroring the novel’s title and central theme of addiction and intense feeling.

My loves.

I feel like I had something else to write about, but I can’t think of it right now, and I’m getting tired actually.

I’m going to end this here and hope you all have a great week!

💕Shel💕

New Years resolutions / goals and a funny story.

New Years resolutions / goals and a funny story.

Shel R.5 Comments

So, how did everyone’s New Years Eve go?

Mine was laid back and chill.

I grabbed pizza for the kids before I came home, and I planned to get a bottle of wine for myself, but I actually skipped that.

The kids ate and my sons were in bed early, so they knocked out and I didn’t even wake them up for the ball drop, or anything. I let them sleep, because as long as they were warm, safe and peaceful – if they wanted to bring in the NEW YEAR with snores – I was all good with that. 😁 My daughter and I stayed up the whole time watching the NEW YORK events, performers, people, and then what we thought – was going to be the ball drop.

Anyone else disappointed we didn’t get to see that?

After the countdown – the view went to the crowd and confetti.

I think many people have mentioned something about not seeing it, and how odd that was.

Either way – we then watched the little bit of LIVE streaming Chicago had going on for their first ever ball drop, and we were disappointed to know that while (Chance the Rapper) was hosting it and performing a bit, he wasn’t seen much from what people in Chi-town are saying. Still, I heard the fireworks were beautiful and the city was peaceful that night. ❤️

I heard a few other music artists were down there as well. The ones who are from Chi.

Many years back – Chance the Rapper – donated a good amount of money to some Chicago area schools, and one of them – was my older daughter’s school – (Benito Juarez Community academy HS) – in Chicago’s Pilsen neighborhood. My older daughter still went there at the time, so she was so excited to tell people that her school was one of them on the list.

I’ll always have love for Chance – and any other rapper / artist who decides to give back to their cities that they came from.

Once we watched the celebrations in NY and Chicago, and they were over – Kailani and I wished each other a Happy New Year, and we both went to our rooms and knocked out.

No selfies that night. No loud music. No wine.

Just living in the moment and relaxing.

She did have to make it known – as soon as the New Year hit – that she will be “graduating this year”, and She will be turning 18. I’m a little sad about that, but we’ll deal with that when those two major events roll around.

So…..

Did you make any resolutions for 2026?

Let me share some of mine.

Weight loss:

I’ve been on this journey for years now, and I keep messing it up.

This year, it has to be taken seriously because I’ll be 44, and my kids need me to stick around a lot longer.

I’m not young anymore, and if I want to be there for them for many more years, this is one way to guarantee it.

When I lived in Chicago and then moved to Minnesota, I was slim. I was active. I enjoyed working out and being on the move all the time.

When my oldest child was taken from this earth, that’s when things got bad. Really bad.

I stopped working out. I wasn’t active for a long time, because I just wanted to be in bed all day.

I would shower, go to work, and do nothing after.

I wasn’t eating right. I was drinking. I was depressed, angry, confused, and had so many questions that I’d never get the answers to. Things got bad for years, and I just didn’t care, so instead of cooking homemade meals like I used to and doing things outdoors, or going places – I’d pick up fast food, eat, and go to sleep.

I’d take care of my kids of course. Took them to school, helped with homework, made sure they ate meals, made sure laundry was done and the house was clean all the time, but – other than what I had to do – there was no working out, or taking care of “being fit” because my oldest was gone. I didn’t have a will to live, or to care about me. So, I gained weight, and kept gaining because I wasn’t active anymore, and I was eating whatever, drinking whatever. Sleeping for hours.

In 2025 – I promised myself it’s time to get back to the old me. The me who worked out. Who was active. Who didn’t even have time to eat because I was making so much money and had dreams / goals, and ambitions.

2025 – just helped me heal a little more, and to finally accept that my oldest was gone, and I’ll never get those answers I felt like I needed. That I wanted. That I struggled so hard to get from whatever happened that night she was killed. 2025 – I knew I needed to get back on my “A-GAME” and get my money right – get my fitness back together – and make sure I was taking care of me as well – because I have kids, and you can’t pour from an empty glass, right?

I was drained for years. Mentally. Emotionally. Physically.

2025 – taught me that I’ve been down and out for too long, and it was time to get my ass back to God, and to get back on my feet after years of struggling with depression, anger, and a pain no parent should ever have to go through.

2026 – THIS YEAR – This is for me. This comeback is personal. This year – I’m doing everything I plan to do, and that includes getting fit again. Eating better. Thinking better. Living better.

Okay, so we have an event tomorrow and my kids made me promise them McDonald’s after. 🤣

And – we still have leftover Christmas cookies. So, I promised myself that on the 4th – I was going to plug in the treadmill that usually holds clean clothes that need to be hung up when they come out of the dryer – and I am going to get my ass on there every day – maybe twice a day.

I said I was going to go for more walks, drink more water, and eat right this year.

I’m going to 100% get out of this funk I’ve been in for years now and get back to the me that I was when I lived in Chicago, and when I first moved here.

I do need to lose this weight I gained over the years, and while some people will look at me and tell me I’m crazy or there’s not much to lose, I can see it and feel it, and I want it gone. So, that’s a goal I plan to accomplish this year. To at least – get back down to what I was when I packed up my life in IL. and moved to MN.

For anyone trying to do the same – let me also say that while it’s NOT easy trying to eat right, exercise and lose weight – cheat days are okay, as long as you only have ONE of them here and there, and it’s okay to NOT exercise everyday – as long as when the next day comes – you get up and go at it again. 😊

Moving to civilization:

Another 2026 New Years resolution I have – is to move my kids and I – closer to civilization.

The little town we live in is dead. I mean – dead. dead.

We don’t have much around here, and everything is usually closed down by 8 PM or earlier.

Everyone is in each other’s business. If you do something, people are going to know before you blink an eye.

Gossip travels fast.

Everyone knows everyone or is related to everyone.

Last names matter here.

This little town is boring and there’s not much to do, unless you want to drive miles and miles away, hours and hours away, and have to travel back home again.

In the nearest bigger “town” – we have two or five of everything.

There’s no variety of anything here.

We have two McDonald’s. Two Burger Kings. Three Starbucks. FOUR Caribou coffees, and a bunch of random pizza places all within 5-10 minutes of each other. We have a bunch of banks, and car washes, but nothing really for kids to do.

No real stores. We have everything on repeat, and our mall is just as dead as these towns.

In Chicago, there were so many good food places, and a huge variety of cultural choices.

In Chicago, there are tons of stores upon stores of different kinds, and they’re all so close together and you don’t have to travel miles or hours to find something for the kids to do. There are tons of places for kids to go in IL.

I thought I wanted the country life – until I got it – and was hit with the reality of it. ha.

Now – I know why people leave small country towns for bigger cities.

So, in the next two months – I plan to buy a bunch of bins, pack up everything we don’t use right now or need out, and put them in these bins. I plan to stack them up in a corner somewhere and get rid of things we don’t want to keep or need. I plan to have the kids do the same in their bedrooms and get rid of what they don’t need or want, pack up things they’re taking with us when we move, and get everything ready.

In April – I plan to start looking for work near a place in Wisconsin – closer to IL. or – in a suburb near my aunt and uncles in IL. because I love it there, and drop the money on a place, so when my youngest daughter graduates, there’s a moving truck in the parking lot and we already have a place to move to.

We are so ready to get out of here and get back to a variety of food places – (although I don’t need that while trying to hit my weight loss goal), a variety of stores, and things to do. We’re ready to get back to being closer to friends and family. We’re so ready to get back to places being open late, or 24 hours in some spots. We’re so ready to be where there’s better job opportunities, and more money.

We’re just ready to go.

So – this month and next – are going to be filled with packing and cleaning up the apartment we’re in now, and April – will be the month of searching for a place and dropping money on it – so when May comes, we’re starting over – somewhere else, and leaving 6 long years in Minnesota – in the dust.

I think the first year of this place was our happiest, and after that – we wondered what the hell we got ourselves into moving to this small town. Yes, it’s safe. Yes, it’s quiet. Yes, I love hearing the cows next door “moo” when I open the windows and they’re out. Yes, I love hearing the gunshots when it’s hunting season, but – I’m just ready to be around the familiar places, people, and things I grew up with back home.

No, I don’t want to move directly into Chicago, but yes, it will be nice to be at least an hour from family and friends – and not almost 10 hours.

So, that’s a resolution of mine this year.

Getting the hell out of dodge and going back towards who and what we know.

Career:

There are no career opportunities where we are now, and one of my biggest New Years resolutions – is to be offered a job as a probation officer. It’s been a dream of mine since I was 15 and I had a probation officer – which is a story for another time.

Since then – I’ve always thought it’d be pretty cool to become one and help other juveniles change their lives – like she helped me. Like many people just like her – including a few cops I met along the way – helped me.

Oddly enough, they don’t need probation officers in our little area – even though there are plenty of kids who are in need of one, but we only have a few.

I was so excited the beginning of this year when I was still in school for my BA degree in Criminal Justice, and I applied for and was offered an internship for probation, but – because my school and the county needed to create a contract for me to do this, and it took forever – I was graduating before I ever got to do the internship. I was literally a few weeks away from graduation when a contract was finally set, but by then – it was too late because the internship would go towards my credits and I already had those.

I was bummed, but hopefully – knowing there’s so many career opportunities in bigger cities I’ve been looking into moving to – maybe it will finally happen for me.

If not, at least there’s more opportunities for other positions in the field I went to school for.

I love the job I have now – dealing with those who were once homeless, who are alcoholics, drug addicts, have mental health issues, etc. but – it’s not my dream career and the pay sucks. I do it because I love it, and I love the people, but it’s not forever.

Stepping into my dream career for 2026 – is a goal of mine.

Debts:

This year is going to be the year that I will work two or three jobs if I have to – or pick up a side hustle – to get myself debt – free. I don’t have a lot of debt, but I do plan to pay off my car and trade it in this year to treat myself to a little graduation gift – since I completed both degrees over the last 4 years and haven’t done anything nice for myself to celebrate both degrees.

This year is going to be the year that I work my ass off and pay off whatever I need to – to make sure that my only debt – is my new SUV if I get one, a mortgage if I’m able to drop some money on a house this year or next, and my basic bills. I don’t think that’s too much to set as a goal, is it?! This year is the year that I don’t want to worry about any finances, and I just want to live my best life with my kids.

This is the year that I want to do more traveling, see more places, and do more things with them.

This is the year I want to say, “Yes – I have extra money. Let’s go out this weekend!” and really mean it!

I want all my debts cleared, and I don’t want to worry about anything this year, except what the kids and I are doing on my days off.

God:

A good friend of mine and I were talking a while back and we both decided to start reading the BIBLE more this year. To really study it and write down our favorite quotes and scriptures, stories, lessons, etc. and not just read it – but REALLY read it and focus on it. We plan to talk about it, share our thoughts with each other, and make it our “go-to” when life is kicking our asses.

We both said our souls are a mess and we need to get right with God. lol.

We found it hilarious yesterday when I left her a message saying, “Get your Bible ready. This is our year. We said we were going to do this”, and I told her what I plan to do, and without listening to my message – she sent me almost the same thing, so we took it as a sign that God is up there like, “Let’s go girls! It’s time!”. haha.

I feel like this year, I need to trust God more and stop trying to run everything.

These are just some of my goals for the year. Some of my New Years reslutions.

What are yours?

If you want to hear a funny story about God – let me share this with you before I get out of here. 😁

On Christmas Eve, my son got paid and asked if he could use my car to do some last-minute shopping and run a few places. I let him, but because my car needs work – I told him not to go far.

He was headed to the nearest bigger city 30 minutes away, and I got a phone call from my daughter. She went with him.

I answered and I heard a police officer loud and clear in the background but couldn’t hear what he was saying or what was going on. My heart dropped!

You know my oldest was killed in a car accident, and now my other two children just took my car – and I get a call and just hear the cop talking. Finally, I heard my son say, “Is mom on the phone?”. My daughter said yeah, and she said, “Hello?”. I kept saying hello before she said her first hello, and I was so relieved to hear both of their voices. I asked her what was going on. She said she had me on speaker, and that they got pulled over.

I was so grateful it was just that and that they didn’t get into an accident or hit a deer.

I was so grateful they were both okay.

The officer got on the phone and said the reason he pulled my son over – was because the tabs were expired.

I told him the car has been giving issues, so I try not to drive it a lot, but I just ordered the new tabs online and that I have the insurance on my phone if he wanted me to send proof to my daughter, so she could show him. He said that would be great, so I did.

He gave my son a warning about driving without the new tabs and the insurance card on him, and he let them go.

My son came back home, and they told me that the officer told him that I also have to take the cross I have – off my rearview mirror. He said it’s an “obstruction to view”. It’s a small cross that says, “For he will command his angels to guard you in all your ways”.

I told Frankie it’s not coming down.

Frankie (my older son) asked if I was seriously going to leave it up. I sure am!

He asked what I was going to do if that same cop stops me next time and tells me the same thing.

Me to said cop if it happens: “That battle is between you and God when you get up there, but it’s not going anywhere. I’ll take the ticket, but don’t cry when you have to answer to that man up there when you meet him”. 😁

I had my kids laughing, but I thought it was funny.

Good Lord, I’m just glad they are okay because I panicked that day.

I have to get out of here and get ready to start my day, but you all have a beautiful weekend…

and I love you!

❤️Shel❤️

A little bit of Nostalgia.

A little bit of Nostalgia.

Shel R.6 Comments
Daily writing prompt
What makes you feel nostalgic?
View all responses

Good morning!

As I sit here with my coffee, I had to answer today’s WP writing prompt because I just saw a video on TikTok that actually made me shed a few tears (literally) when I woke up.

I was still in bed, but I always check the news, the weather, my messages, missed calls, etc. and then – I’ll scroll the TOK for a bit if I have time or nothing to do. I don’t work today, so – as I was scrolling the TOK – the video I saw this morning had some sad music playing in the background and the video said:

“It’s almost 2026. That means that 1996 was 30 years ago! What was your life like back then?”.

Yes, I shed a few tears, because – what do you mean 1996 was 30 years ago?

The first thing I thought about when I saw that video – was “Damn, I graduated 8th grade in 1996 and started high school months later”.

I giggled as I thought back to 8th grade and especially – all the good times in high school.

One of my favorite memories has always been sitting in my English class when it started, and one of my good friends being late. She was trying to run into class before the teacher took attendance, and she ended up falling and sliding into the class – so her body was half in and half out of the door. We were both laughing and I yelled, “SAFE!!!! HOME RUN!!!!”. She got a detention for being late because the bell already rang, and when the teacher told me to come up and get my detention, I asked what for?!

“Screaming in my classroom for no good reason and disrupting the class”.

Me: THE CLASS IS LAUGHING, TOO!

I still got the detention. lol.

Memories like that – make me smile and make me feel NOSTALGIC.

In high school – there was a time where my best friends and I would cut classes once-in-a-while.

DO NOT RECOMMEND!

If you’re young, go to class and do well. I wish I could go back in time and do things over – the right way.

Anyway, there was a day when my best friend and I planned to cut the entire day of school and go to one of our favorite malls, but when we walked out the back door of the high school, her dad was parked right there. I guess he heard our phone conversation the night before and he was ready to take us right back into school – which he did. 🤣

I remember screaming on one side of the hall – to friends’ way on the other side of the hall – and everyone in between – laughing because we were loud. I remember driving our favorite teachers crazy, and everyone in my circle taking up three or four lunch tables because there were so many of us who got along and loved the hell out of each other. 💕

I miss high school if I’m being honest, and those were some of the best days of my life.

Those memories make me feel NOSTALGIC.

Seeing items from back then that I used or had – makes me feel Nostalgic.

Not just the memories of those happier times.

Do you remember the Tamagotchi era?

I had one of these and so did many of the kids in my high school.

I remember many of us trying to sneak and check on our pets during class. I remember getting in trouble over these in class when they made noises because our pets were thirsty, or hungry, or needed to use the bathroom. 😁 I had mine connected to my jeans or book bag and finally – classes started to ban them.

AND – THE DIAL UP CONNECTIONS BACK THEN – WERE WILD.

America Online was super popular back in 1996, and it took forever to get online.

It used the same line as our housephones, and if the phone rang – the connection to AOL was lost.

We’d have to start the long sign on process all over again.

If my parents needed to use the phone, I’d have to get offline, and tell friends I was chatting with, “BRB”.

(Be right back). ha.

Do you remember the awful sound it made while it was trying to connect? If not – or you’re too young to remember it – let me show you what I dealt with – what many kids dealt with – back in the 90s trying to get online. We didn’t have good WI-FI or any at all back then.

Try being a kid in the 90’s – knowing you’re supposed to be in bed – but wanting to chat with friends online and risking your parents hearing these sounds as you try to sneak chat late at night. 🤣

This makes me feel Nostalgic.

When the Chicago Bulls won the 1996 Championship – the world and Chicago of course – went absolutely wild!!!!

When people still talk about it today, it gives me a great sense of Nostalgia. 😁

I was at my best friend’s house spending the night when this took place.

Her, I, her brother and sister and the teens from next door to her house – were all outside and when they won. Cars were honking like crazy; people were yelling out of car windows, fireworks were going off all over, and people were celebrating that win.

A car past by her house, beeped and people were cheering, so her brother started screaming and cheering.

It was late at night, and her mother looked out of their 3rd floor window and called us inside. When we went upstairs and asked why, she told my best friend’s brother, “You’re making too much noise!”. He replied, “So is the rest of Chicago!”. My best friend and I couldn’t help but laugh, so her mother turned around, put her hands on her hips and told us, “Girls! Don’t encourage him!”.

This magazine back then was EVERYTHING and anytime a photo of it pops up somewhere online – or I hear someone talking about it now – it makes me giggle but makes me sad a little. Totally makes me feel Nostalgic. I used to get this magazine in the mail every month when I was a teenager and into my early 20s, and I’d always have to order something from it.

The fashion was definitely unique, and some of the ways those modeling the clothes took the photos – were hilarious. Who was subscribed to get this? DON’T LIE. haha.

It’s not around anymore. They created some knock-off version but it’s nothing like this one.

These magazines were favorites of mine – as well as many other teens back in the 90s:

Remember when Jonathan Taylor Thomas was all teen girls’ dream boy?

Then ………………..

Semi-Now……

(Photo taken from US Weekly. This was him back in 2023, so he has changed a bit once again).

Back to the magazines though –

I used to buy so many copies of different magazines back then, and they came with posters inside.

I miss those days, and again – they make me feel Nostalgic when I hear someone talking about them or see old copies of these magazines. I don’t think they’re around anymore, but I could be wrong. I don’t know what this new generation has now.

I remember one of mine and my best friend’s favorite teen rap groups back then – was KRIS KROSS.

I also remember when she got the very last magazine that had them in it. I was a little jealous, but she was nice enough to let me borrow it. lol.

I was so excited when I got the last copy of their cassette at Kmart when “Totally Krossed out” came out.

That’s what it looked like.

They started the trend back then of people wearing some of their clothes backwards.

Hell, a few months ago – I purchased a small stereo off Amazon with a CD and cassette player, pulled out a bag of Cassettes I still have – and that alone – made me feel Nostalgic.

I had some good times and I think – if I’m being honest – us 90s kids had it great.

My older son says the 90s looks like they were a lot of fun, and he wishes he was able to live through those years, but he was born in 2003. 😊 The 90s were the best, and when I think back to those times, those memories, everything great we had before WI-FI and social media, before smartphones, and all this other technology – life was good.

When we got to ride around and be kids all day.

When we knew it was time to go home – when the streetlights came on.

When we knew where all our friends were – by where all the bikes on the lawn were.

When a piece of gum costs .5-.25 cents for Bazooka – and they came with the comics inside.

When all our family members were still alive and well, and summer days were spent catching fireflies and playing RED ROVER, RED LIGHT – GREEN LIGHT, or WATERCOLORS on the steps of the elementary school by the house.

When we all ran to our houses to get money when we heard the ice cream truck coming and lived just a block or two away from each other.

All of this – makes me feel Nostalgic.

I miss it all and there’s so many other memories, items of Nostalgia – and places I could write about, but I just wanted to jot down a few that came to my mind this morning, as I answered the WP writing prompt, and after I saw that video on TIKTOK about how 1996 was 30 years ago, and it made me tear-up a bit.

It seems like just yesterday, but it’s so far gone, it’s sad.

We did have it good, and the 90s were amazing.

From me graduating 8th grade and starting high school – to all my memories back then, good times, and things I remember or had – it was the best.

One other memory that comes to mind and makes me laugh – is when my best friend slept over one day, and I had my bedroom on the 2nd floor – front of the house, so if I opened the three big windows I had in my bedroom – I could easily climb out onto the this little awning / almost like a roof on the house.

I would go out there and sit on summer nights and just look up at the sky while everyone else slept.

The night my best friend slept over back in high school – we were playing TRUTH OR DARE, and she dared me to go out into the roof and yell, “I LOVE YOU, JAKE!”. (Not his real name, but I’m totally not putting his real name here) – although – he’s deceased now sadly.

He was a teenage boy – a little older than us – who lived a few houses down from where I grew up, and I had the biggest crush on him. My best friend knew that.

Little did I know – that he and his friends were outside at 2 AM – when this dare took place, and I took it!

I climbed out on this little roof, and yelled “I LOVE YOU, JAKE!” – thinking there’s no way he’d hear it.

IMAGINE MY SHOCK – and embarrassment – when Jake yelled back, “I LOVE YOU, TOO!”.

🤣🤣🤣🤣❤️😶😶😶😶😶❤️🤣🤣🤣🤣

I have never climbed back in that window so fast….. !!!!

My best friend couldn’t stop laughing.

I think I avoided Jake after that night.

The reason I couldn’t see that he and his friends were outside – was because there was a huge pine tree right next to our house that blocked the view to his.

I think we were only 15 at that time.

NOSTALGIC memories are totally the best!!!!!

They make me feel like I’m young again, and they’re bitter-sweet.

Another thing that makes me feel Nostalgic – is the sound of a lawn mower running on a hot summer day.

My dad used to always cut the grass in front of our house and in back, and I love the smell of fresh cut grass.

So, when I hear a lawn mower and smell the grass – I think of my younger years.

Road trips – I remember road trips to Michigan to visit family, and Pennsylvania for Family reunions, so now – when my kids and I take road trips anywhere – I think of the crazy days when my mom had to make sure that we packed everything we needed, made sandwiches for the road, and spent hours trying to stop my brother and I from fighting in the car – as I do now sometimes – with my kids. 🤣 Only – I don’t make sandwiches to put in the cooler with pop, and snacks like my parents did.

We just stop and eat somewhere.

Still – road trips make me feel Nostalgic.

I miss that time in life.

When all was good and the weight of the world wasn’t on my shoulders.

Anyway, I’m looking forward to reading other people’s Nostalgic answers.

Have a beautiful day my loves.

AND – HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

I know I said it already, but that’s okay.

❤️Shel❤️

When work comes home with you – you have to unleash and release.

When work comes home with you – you have to unleash and release.

Shel R.3 Comments

Today has been one hell of a day.

Usually, Sundays are relaxing at work. Sundays are quiet. Sundays are chill.

Sundays are my favorite day at work because nothing ever happens on a Sundays.

My son works with me on the weekends, so we were a little surprised at all the stuff that went on today, especially with one of the tenants in our facility – that we’ll call “Nick”.

I’m not going to sit here and get into the whole thing because we dealt with Nick for HOURS – at different times today – and once we thought all was quiet again – Nick would start things up again. My son and I were the only staff working today, and with over 60 tenants in the building – it can become a lot. It can get stressful, overwhelming and crazy, especially if there’s so much going on at one time – like today.

I will say that Nick was having issues with his girlfriend and another guy that his girlfriend may – or may not – be seeing behind his back, so Nick decided to down a huge bottle of Vodka and start acting out – right in the facility we work in. Right in the lobby.

Thankfully – nobody else was in the lobby, because when Nick came to us and said he needed to talk and we knew he was very much angry and drunk – we were able to deal with him in private and with nobody else watching what was going on, or being nosy.

When Nick said he needed to talk, I asked if he wanted to talk to my son (man to man), or me. He said he didn’t care. My son went to the lobby and talked with Nick for a bit, and a few moments later – I heard something hit the window and saw a guy who looked like my son – standing on the other side of the building in the lobby – and his arm was up like he just threw something.

I thought he threw a punch.

I thought Nick attacked my son and my son was fighting back.

I jumped up and ran to the lobby – only to thankfully find out Nick had just thrown a can of pop that busted all over, and my son was standing behind him trying to calm him down.

I told my son to take over in the office, and I watched as Nick turned and punched the wall.

I stood right in front of him, made him look me in the eyes, and I grabbed his hands.

“You CANNOT lose your housing or your freedom and both of those will happen if you don’t cut it out! Nick, no woman is worth this and she’s not the only one out there. If she’s trying to make you jealous, or you’re acting like this because she’s throwing another man in your face, she’s not the one for you! You’re going to end up in jail – or out on the streets again if you get kicked out of here, and she’s still going to be warm, eating good – with a place to live still. Is that what you want?”.

I gave him a little speech and tried talking common sense into him – while still holding on to his hands.

He said no.

He also said a lot of other things that worried me, and after all the different situations that happened with him today, we had a long and serious talk after the 3rd issue he caused.

At one point, the police had to be called. Actually, I called for the paramedics, and dispatch sent the police instead.

When they walked in – I met them in the hallway.

Officer A smiled this adorable, beautiful smile and asked, “How’s it going?”.

Me: It’s been a day already, and I just got here a few hours ago. You single?

No, I didn’t ask if he was single, but he was such a beautiful man, I was tempted. lol.

Officer B. wasn’t bad looking, either.

Both officers had me take them to Nick’s room, and they dealt with him.

After they left, I had my son laughing so much when I said that even though it’s been a wild day so far – dealing with everything going on with others, and then all the stuff with Nick – I totally didn’t mind some eye candy that early in the morning. He said for my birthday, he’s just going to rent me a room next year and hire two male strippers dressed like cops. He laughed even more when I told him I want the real thing. I don’t want a fake cop. 😁

Seriously though, I don’t know what will happen with Nick after today’s madness, but I pray for him and just hope he can work out his issues.

Part of working in any field that has to do with those who were once homeless, are criminals, violent, or have drug / alcohol issues – is that you support them, show love and compassion, respect them, and do what you can to calm them down, keep them calm, etc.

So, today – while Nick was looking for something else to punch after I let go of his hands, I told him, “NO!”, and asked if he needed a hug. He looked at me for a few moments – sadness in his eyes, and I opened my arms to him – giving him the biggest teddy bear hug!

Mental health is a real thing that needs love, and compassion – and I know this man has mental health issues. Mix alcohol in there, and it becomes a scary and dangerous combination. Once he got that hug, and I had this serious talk about his housing, how he should want to act to keep it, and not wanting to go to jail over this girl – we were able to sit down in the lobby and have an hour-long conversation, and he was able to remain calm the rest of the day.

I have seen both – the good and the bad sides of Nick.

He can really be such a cool guy sometimes.

Just yesterday – I was in the office, and he came up to the office window – pointing two nerf guns at me.

He started shooting the window and laughed. He said he got them for $10, and he was having fun.

I joked and told him, “I WANT TO PLAY!”.

He handed one to me.

We had fun.

Today, he also fell on his ass. Slid on ice outside, and when I went out there and asked if he really just fell, he laughed about it and said he broke his butt. So, he has a good side to him. He has a funny side.

Today, when he was finally calm after many hours of anger – we were sitting on the armchairs in the lobby talking, and he apologized to me for the cops being there. I joked that he did me a favor because I was able to see some “eye candy” so early in the morning. He looked at me, smiled and told me, “SSSSSHHHUUUTTT UPPPPP!”. lol. I did tell him I was expecting the medics after the issue he caused in his room – but the cops showed up instead, so they weren’t there because I wanted them to be. I wanted the medics for him.

He really is a good guy, but again – when you mix anger, mental health issues and liquor – it can go bad – fast! That’s what happened today. All day.

Still, I love my job.

I love that when these beautiful people need someone who cares – I can be there.

*****

Have you seen the movie “DANGEROUS MINDS?” – with Michelle Pfeiffer???

She works with bad ass teenagers and she’s trying to make them WANT to learn. WANT to change their lives.

At one point in the movie – one of them ask her why she even cares and says something about her just being in it for the money. She makes a comment back like, “I make a choice to care, and honey – the money isn’t that great!”. Something like that.

Today – one of my other tenants I see every day – was upset because I wouldn’t give him his alcohol portion since he hasn’t been eating much. I refused, and he’s just not used to that – coming from me. As soon as I walked in this morning, he smiled big – greeted me at the door – and yelled, “There she is!”. Why? He thought he was getting alcohol as soon as I walked in.

Nope. I told him he had to eat breakfast first.

He was upset.

I told him I heard he hasn’t been eating much, and I can’t have him living off alcohol portions.

I’ll tell you what he didn’t do.

He didn’t yell at me like he yells at anyone else.

He was respectful, but he did ask me why I even care. He said nobody gives a shit about him and then he says, “All of you just want the money”. I did that Michelle Pfeiffer comment and told him, “I make a choice to care, and honey – the money isn’t that great!”. I meant it, too! The money is nothing to brag about. It sucks – honestly, but I love my job, and I care so much about each one of the people who live in this facility.

I love seeing all of them daily – and joking around – making them smile – getting a laugh out of them because they know I try to be funny and make their day better. I use humor with all of them, and many of them enjoy that and joke right back.

Recently, I received a (Certificate of Appreciation) award from work. I was thrilled.

This made me smile and made me feel good.

I do make the choice to care – even if it’s just a paycheck for others.

I do give a shit, and I’ll continue – until I move and no longer work there.

Today – a few of the tenants planned to walk to the liquor store right when lunch started.

I knew they hadn’t eaten and I asked three of them if they grabbed lunch.

They said no.

I told them to march their butts to the kitchen before they go out in the ice and snow and take that long walk.

Guess what they did?

Agreed they’d better get lunch, and they all walked to the kitchen – where my son was handing out lunches.

One of them laughed when I joked that I feel like they’re all my “adult children!”. 😁

It has totally been a wild day. I’m exhausted. I work early again tomorrow, and while being single is great – sometimes, I do wish I had someone to come home to – to hand me a glass of wine, listen to me talk about all of this instead of writing it all to get it off my chest, and someone to massage my feet or shoulders – while he listens to me vent.

Thank all of you for listening to me vent though! Or – reading. 😶

I just had dinner. I’m going to cuddle up in bed and possibly listen to some music before I fall asleep.

💕Shel💕

Christmas is over! Say what?!!!!!

Christmas is over! Say what?!!!!!

Shel R.8 Comments

Months of planning. Months of shopping and wrapping. Months of preparing. One night of playing Santa and doing everything he’s supposed to do. Hours of cooking and cleaning up – And you mean to tell me it’s all over now?!

When I was a little girl, we used to go to my grandma Shirley’s / Pap-Pap (grandpa’s) place for Christmas eve.

All of my aunts and uncles were there.

All of my cousins were there.

Life was good.

The adults would be in the kitchen cooking, talking, drinking, laughing, or in the dining room around the table – joking around and having a good time. The men would be outside smoking, and us cousins – we were in the living room – just waiting to open gifts and teasing each other.

The Christmas bells outside of their house played music. They had some awesome Christmas lights lining their front windows, and everything was decorated inside.

Those we good times.

After a while, my Pap-pap passed, and grandma moved somewhere else, so my uncle was hosting Christmas at his place.

The adults would be upstairs, while us cousins were in the basement getting into mischief.

I remember one Christmas when one of my cousins was opening his gift from someone, held it up and yelled, “YYYYEESSS!”. Our grandma asked if he knew what it was, and he said, “No!”. lol. Someone told him it was socks. He had us laughing when he looked at a few of us cousins and whispered (sarcastically), “Just what I’ve always wanted. Now, I just have to wait to open a pair of Chonies!”. (Underwear). 🤣

One of my favorite Christmas memories – is when my Uncle L. went to the store next to my Uncle T’s house, and he told me and one of my cousins not to open the door for ANYONE. Nobody. He said he meant that, too!

So, when he came back and he was knocking to get in, my cousin asked who it was. My Uncle L. yelled my cousins name and told him to stop playing and open the door because it was cold out there. My cousin looked at me and smiled as we sat on the stairs right by the door. He yelled back, “You said not to let ANYONE in. NOBODY! You meant that, too!”. We laughed so much, and as my uncle continued to bang on the door and yell for us to open it, my cousin kept laughing and telling him, “But dad – you said….”.

When he finally got in, my uncle told his son, “Remind me to kick your ass later!”. 😁

I loved hanging out with certain cousins during Christmas at my grandma or uncles house.

Christmas at Grandma Shirley’s / Pap-Pap’s and Uncle Ts was fun because they always had the music blasted with either Christmas music or Mexican music. It alternated, went back and forth, and many times – family would dance and mingle.

People passing by could hear the music from outside and know there was a big party going on.

This is one of the photos I have from one of the many Christmas Eve parties at my grandma Shirley and Pap-pap’s place.

Unfortunately, I don’t have many photos of back then, but this is one I do have that I love.

A few of my cousins and me.

I’m in the white and black dress with the cheesy smile. ❤️As you can tell, they couldn’t get us all to look and smile at the same time, but that’s how pictures usually went. Some of my cousins were always ready, and some of them were always joking around and not taking it seriously. ha.

Christmas was always filled with so much laughter, love and good memories from Christmas Eve at my grandma Shirley and Pap-pap’s house, to the ones we spent at my uncle T’s house, and then rushing home to get to bed before Santa came. On Christmas Day – my other aunt and uncle on my mom’s side – would come over to my Yia-Yia’s place – who lived downstairs from us – and we’d celebrate Christmas day there, opening more gifts, eating more good food, and enjoying more love, laughter, and good memories being made.

As we got older – family traditions of going to anyone’s house kind of faded away little by little, and eventually – it just became about main family. Everyone started doing their own things, and when my parents moved into a new place, we started getting together there. Just my brother, his now ex-wife, his family and me and my kids. That was it. That became our new Christmas / holiday tradition.

We still had fun though.

Eventually, Christmas was at my brother’s place.

So, Christmas had changed a lot over the years, but I still hold on to some great memories of people, places and funny stuff from each and every one of them – no matter how or where we celebrated it.

One tradition I miss – that no longer happens – is the Christmas gift wars between my brother and me.

My mom used to call us “idiots” because we’d be trying to open prank gifts from each other for 20-40 minutes each year. We did our Christmas prank wars every year for many years, and we’d always try to top the last year by making each gift harder and harder to open for the other.

One year – my brother wrapped so much string around my gift and then zip-tied it.

I got through all of the string and the zip-ties – only for it to be this:

It says, “You just wasted all that time for this!”.

The following year, I zip-tied his, bubble wrapped it, and did so many other things to make it hard for him to open, only for him to finally get it open and see this:

“KARMA!”. lol.

He threw it behind him and tried not to laugh.

One year – he got me good though. I won’t lie.

I love trolls! The crazy-wild haired, big eyed 90’s trolls.

I walked into my parent’s house for Christmas one year, and he pointed at a bag and told me, “No jokes this year. No Christmas prank wars. This is your gift right here, but you can’t open it yet!”. I saw a little bit of it when I looked down, and I was so excited when I saw a few parts of TROLL HAIR! I couldn’t wait to open it and thought he got me new ones.

That night after dinner – when we were all opening gifts, he told one of my kids, “Give your mother that gift right there from me”. One of my kids handed it to me, and I opened it. I noticed it was three trolls that I already have, so I asked where he got them from to maybe exchange them, because I said I already had them. He and my mother laughed and he told me, “No, you HAD them! Those are yours!”.

He stole a few trolls from the top of my fridge in my kitchen when he came over a few weeks before, and I didn’t even know they were missing. My mother was laughing so hard at the fact that I was so confused and had no idea how he grabbed them without me noticing. 🙄

I admit – that was a good one.

One year, I purchased a safe at the store, put his REAL gift inside of it, and locked the safe.

It was a combo safe, and I only I had the combination that came with it.

When he unwrapped it, I told him that his real gift was inside if he could crack the code.

It literally took him 5 minutes, and he had the safe open without breaking it or anything.

My jaw dropped and I sat there wondering how the hell he got it open so fast without the combination.

He made me laugh when he said, “I’m in the Military. You’d be surprised what I could do!”.

Then again, it was a cheap safe I purchased as a joke, so maybe they all had the same combos?!

Sadly, my brother is dealing with a lot of stuff these days and other issues, so we don’t talk much and living so far away from each other doesn’t help either. Our yearly Christmas gift wars – have stopped, but those will always be some of my best Christmas memories. 💕

I’ll never forget the Christmas my kids and I went to his house – and I walked in to see him like:

I laughed so much at his outfit.

It lit up, too!

Our dad was in the hospital, and he said he was going to the hospital to see our father – just like this. I asked if he was serious and he made me giggle when he says, “I don’t have anyone to impress!”.

I also remember the Christmas when he was telling everyone, “You get wrapping paper for Christmas! You get wrapping paper for Christmas! You get wrapping paper for Christmas!”, as he pointed at everyone and had us all laughing.

Other favorite Christmas memories I’ll always cherish:

Always taking my kids to BASS PRO SHOP to see Santa and do some of their Christmas activities.

On this day – Santa asked my two older kids if they’ve been good all year.

I laughed so much when they both looked at each other and didn’t know what to say.

Do we lie or do we tell the truth?! 😁

No matter how old my kids have gotten, Bass Pro shop around Christmas time was the place to be.

We don’t have one close by anymore, and I hate that – now that we live off the grid practically.

Family tradition for years now every Christmas – has been going to my aunt and uncles on my mom’s side to celebrate Christmas with them. We love it there, and although they have a new house now, this house (above) held so many good memories as well. If I could buy that house that they had before, I absolutely would!

Every Christmas for years – my mom used to just love to sit down, relax and talk to my kids. This was one of those times – where she sat and had some funny conversations with my two older kids. 💕

Same house my aunt and uncle used to have – during this one Christmas – my little guy and my nephew kept going by the back door and wiggling the door handle, and we caught my nephew pointing outside – as we joked that they were planning their escape.

One Christmas – I had one of my cousins make my Tiffie “Jordan” a mug that said, “There is nowhere you can go that I won’t be with you!”. I never knew heaven would be one of those places. 💔

This photo always makes me laugh!

My brother’s face is priceless!

He was watching T.V. on this Christmas day and heard my oldest kiddo and her girlfriend talking about what they were going to do when they got home (adult conversations) – and my brother overheard them.

He gave them that look above and told them, “Okay, there’s airing out your dirty laundry when you did something you shouldn’t have and I’d be all in for that gossip, and then there’s AIRING OUT DIRTY LAUNDRY NOBODY NEEDS OR WANTS TO HEAR!”. 🤣 I couldn’t stop laughing!

………………..

And every Christmas – my brother ALWAYS made sure there was a YEAR BEAR under the tree for me – no matter where we celebrated. I have a collection of them from different years that he has given me them.

Again, we don’t live close to each other anymore and we barely talk now, so he hasn’t gotten me one of those for a long time, but I miss those Christmas’s when he did. I always cherish those memories, and our gift wars.

My kids know how much I love and miss the YEAR BEARS, so yesterday – when I opened one of their three gifts to me – imagine how happy I was when I saw that they got me one.

Isn’t he cute?! I call him my “Gingerbread man!”. 🥰

They said that they tried to get me his wife, but she was all gone and all they had was males left. They wanted to get me the pair, but I was more than okay with him.

So, let’s talk about this Christmas.

I was up at 4 AM yesterday morning preparing the stuff needed for a dirt cake / pudding / cool whip combo my mom always made – that my kids totally miss and love. She made it every Christmas because she knew they loved and wanted it. So, it became tradition.

That woman took the recipe to the grave with her, and while I offered to try to make it like she did, the kids didn’t know if it would turn out quite like hers. It sure did! It’s delish!

I was up early making my coffee first. I then made the cake, made the pudding, and put that – and the cool whip together.

I have no idea which layer went first, but I did pudding on the bottom, cake, then Cool whip, cake, pudding, cool whip – and I just kept layering it. My mom used to put toffee bits in it, but I couldn’t find any in the last few days, so I added Chocolate chips on top. I think it turned out pretty well!

Maybe not EXACTLY like hers, but close to it.

I thawed the Turkey out, and got everything else ready, while my little guy was begging me to let him open gifts.

Let me tell you what he did on Christmas eve!!

One of my biggest joys during Christmas – is him coming into the bedroom and telling me Santa came – and he’s so excited because he wakes up and checks the living room first thing in the morning every Christmas.

On Christmas eve though – the magic was ruined because he fell asleep and I put him in his room, closed the door, and at 8 PM, I took out all of Santa’s gifts from the closet that I wrapped early that day, so I could just have a few glasses of wine and enjoy a movie after I did everything that “SANTA DOES”. Thinking he was asleep for the night, I put all of Santa’s gifts out, threw some carrots outside pretending the reindeer ate them, crumbled up the cookies “SANTA” ate, wrote a few notes from Santa and the elves, and poured myself a glass of wine.

A few minutes later – he comes out of his room, sees all of the Santa gifts under the tree, and said he couldn’t sleep.

In all fairness, I knew I should have waited until the middle of the night when I heard him snoring, but I just wanted to get it all done. SO, there was none of him coming into the room waking me up excited that Santa came – because he saw all the SANTA gifts under the tree that night. 🥺 Ah well.

He’s 9 and this Christmas has been bitter-sweet, because I don’t know if he’ll believe in the magic of the elves next year, or Santa. It’s bitter-sweet because my youngest daughter is 17, so this is her last Christmas as a kid.

Time and life are moving way too fast! My kids are growing up way too fast.

It’s sad to think that on top of all the Christmas memories I’ve had as a kid and over the years as an adult in different places – this will be just memories, too! It’s also bitter-sweet because this is probably our last Christmas in this apartment, and maybe – Minnesota – as we plan to move next summer.

Yesterday – I made Christmas breakfast. Just some pancakes and Tator tots.

We opened gifts.

The daughter got some ducks – because she collects those little things. One was a graduation duck! One was a witch because we joke that she is one 😁and she also got one with a beanie because I know how much she loves Beanies. They came with cute sunglasses she could change on them.

I got her those.

I got her a Sloth nightlight – because she loves Sloths. I got her a Sloth snow globe. I got her a Chicago hoodie, a gingerbread man tumbler, an amazon gift card, Billie Eilish perfume because she’s been bugging me about it (lol), and a bunch of other things. She also got a computer lap desk that comes with charging ports, a place for her phone, a reading light and a fan on it.

My older son just wanted some tapestry stuff and posters for his wall. His walls are covered with different posters and drawings, tapestry, etc. I got him more. He wanted some monkey phone / controller holder, so I got him that. He showed me it on Amazon weeks ago. I got him cologne (2 bottles. Different kinds). I also brought him a computer lap desk, and – he always talks about getting a motorcycle.

Many motorcycle owners believe in the “Guardian bell”. A bell they hang somewhere on the bike or their keychain like a spiritual guardian angel for the rider. I’ve read legend says that it protects from evil spirits that try to attach themselves to the motorcycle or rider, but I don’t know if that’s true or not. Either way – it’s for protection for the rider.

The rule is – you can’t buy it yourself.

It has to come from someone who truly loves you and wants you to be safe, so while I’m against him getting a motorcycle, I feel like if anyone is going to get him a guardian bell – it should be me. So, I did. It says, “Never drive faster than your guardian angels can fly”. ❤️ I got him many other things as well, and both of kids loved their gifts – just as much as my little dude loved his.

I laughed when my son told my daughter, “She got me a guardian bell. Shhhh! Let me see if I hear a motorcycle pulling into the parking lot!”. I told the kid, “Nice try!”.

Little dude got a scooter, a dart board, roller skates, new knee and elbow pads, Legos, some street hockey items, and much more.

You want to hear something funny?

I forgot I brought him a helmet already from Amazon, so when “SANTA” went shopping, she also brought him a new helmet and didn’t realize there was one under the tree already. 🤣 I need to start writing down what I purchase – to avoid double orders. I’m thinking about making him pick which one he wants to keep (the one Santa brought is much cooler and lights up), so I may just give another child the one I purchased from Amazon.

With my Year Bear – my kids also brought me some things I needed, and an “S” for my computer desk.

Christmas was great.

❤️

The rest of the day was filled with blessings, love, laughter, and good memories being made.

After gifts, we cleaned up, and my older son and I started cooking dinner around 4 PM. I poured a glass of wine and sat down to watch the game between the Detroit Lions and the Minnesota Vikings last night.

I read somewhere yesterday – that Snoop Dogg came out with a song called, “Spending Christmas in Minnesota”. I listened to it and laughed and wondered what he knew about spending Christmas in Minnesota, but then I read that he was actually in Minnesota yesterday for the game – to do the halftime show. So, I had to watch it! 😶 He did a damn good job, too! Him, Lainey Wilson, and anyone else with him.

In case you missed it – here ya go:

My daughter and I watched it and we loved it!

There’s a front / better video on YOUTUBE of the entire thing, but the NFL decided to block it from being used on websites, so you’ll have to deal with this one, and go to YOUTUBE for the better view.

The Lions lost and we were cheering for them.

The tenants at the facility I work at – take the Vikings games seriously, so I joked that if the Lions won – I was going to go into work Saturday and tease them and see which tenant kicks me out first. haha.

After the game and dinner – it was pretty late, so we played a bit, talked a bit, and the kids went to their rooms while I cleaned up the last bit of mess from dinner, poured another glass of wine, sat in the living room in the dark – in silence, and thought to myself, “Good job mama! You have successfully gotten through another Christmas and made it happen once again!”. 💕

Sometimes, we have to be our own cheerleaders and motivational speakers because we just don’t have anyone to do it for us, and that’s okay.

My kids were happy yesterday, they enjoyed Christmas and we had a good time.

This is one more Christmas I’ll add to the “cherished ones of the past”.
We didn’t get too many photos as we were just living in the moment and enjoying all of it.

Today, it’s paying off bills from Christmas shopping, getting back into a regular routine, and trying to make the most of the end of the year.

I will say that if you’ve been following the news, you’ll know that four people have been arrested and charged with planning to place bombs in different locations out in L.A. and causing mass destruction / casualties possibly, and now – many countries are canceling their New Years Eve celebrations and plans.

I haven’t heard much yet about U.S. doing the same, but there’s been some talk about safety measures here.

I will also say that just because the FBI was great at catching these people who planned these bombs to go off at Midnight on NYE, DOESN’T mean that there aren’t more out there working with these people – who can easily carry out the attacks that were planned, so please – wherever you go or whatever you do on New Years eve – stay alert. Watch your surroundings. Avoid large crowds, and always – ALWAYS – plan an escape / exit route just in case.

DO NOT get stuck in the middle of a bunch of people, because in the event that there is an attack or something happens – you’re stuck and can’t get away, so please stay at the end of a crowd where it’s easy to run – or get somewhere safe and use the buddy system if you can. Never go anywhere alone – especially on NYE.

I don’t want to put fear in your minds, and I know we shouldn’t live our lives in fear, but NEW YEARS EVE is one of the biggest celebrations in the world, millions of people are out and about in very crowded places, and big cities, and I just want everyone to be safe and remember to stay on high alert and watch what’s going on around you!

Other than that – cheers to a new year soon, and I hope all of you have a beautiful 2026. 💕

In case I’m not back here until the new year – much love to all of you, thank you for your continued love and support here, and I’m so happy I know all of you, and get to enjoy your writings like you enjoy mine.

Before I get out of here – here’s a fun little photo of me from a few years back during Christmas:

And a fun little photo of this Christmas:

💕Shel💕

Back in 1982 and the Pros and cons of work recently.

Back in 1982 and the Pros and cons of work recently.

Shel R.14 Comments
Daily writing prompt
Share what you know about the year you were born.
View all responses

I haven’t done one of these WP prompts for a while, so here we go.

I will honestly say I don’t know much about the year I was born – except that all of my family was all still alive, healthy and so close. That has since changed, many of have passed, and family no longer gets together like they used to.

So, I had to look up some fun facts, wild history events, etc. that happened in 1982 – (the year I was born), and found these interesting facts.

I had no idea Nicki Minaj and Lil Wayne were born in the same year, but that was interesting to learn.

I listen to Nicki here and there, but I’m a huge fan of Lil Wayne and his songs. (Especially his song MIRROR).

Those popular songs from 1982 – are all still amazing today. Physical, Survivor, I love Rock ‘N Roll – they all still play on the radio, and my grandma Ann LOVED Katherine Hepburn, so it was nice reading all of this.

Reading what things costs back when I was born – had me shocked. Everything was so cheap.

I still owe $10,000 on my car, so to see that a car back then – fully cost $9,903 – makes me wonder what the hell happened that prices of new cars these days are $30,000 + if you want a BRAND new one in most places.

Mine was $30,000 – and I realize now that I could have gotten something bigger and a better, but I still love my car. It’s crazy expensive for no reason though. To think that I would have had it paid off by now if it were 1982 – blows my mind.

A house was $83,000 + ….and now, good houses are anywhere from $279,000 and up.

I’m just throwing average numbers out there, but houses are NOT cheap anymore.

Groceries have gone up like crazy since then.

Gas is up.

It’s sad to see how much times have changed. Even the music now – compared to 1982 – is sad.

I do giggle when I see that M*A*S*H. was one of the most popular T.V shows back then, because my mother hated that show, so whenever she watched her programs and that came on, we knew it was time to turn the T.V. off and do something else. My grandma watched that show and it was boring. However, my grandma LOVED the show DALLAS as well.

Michael Jackson released (Thriller), and E.T. became a popular movie.

I wanted to know more about what happened in 1982 because now I was curious, and I found this video.

That’s all I have.

There’s some history for you.

I could sit here and do more research, but I have to eventually get ready to take the kids to school and get to work. 😊

Today is the last day of school for the kids, and then Winter break starts.

I can’t believe we’re two days away from Christmas – which reminds me to order everything for Christmas dinner today.

I’m still shopping for gifts from “Santa” for the little guy, and stocking stuffers for the kids, and I’ll finally be finished. Of course, you know darn good and well that I plan to get myself a bottle of wine, and enjoy the last gift wrapped tomorrow night. I’m off work tomorrow and Christmas day, thankfully!

Yesterday, we took gifts to Elijah’s teachers, his Kindergarten teacher from many years ago, and his 2nd grade teacher. I mentioned that his 1st grade teacher moved out of state, but his past teachers loved his gifts, and they were so happy. Elijah was so happy to give gifts. He’s like me. He enjoys seeing people happy. ❤️

My car goes in for service today, and I’m praying it’s just a simple fix.

I think that’s all the life updates I have.

🙄

At work – we lost a woman I became close to. She was an alcoholic, and she knew her liver was failing, but she continued to drink. She was one of the tenants at the facility I work in.

I remember when I first met her. I’ll call her “Shannon”.

She was feisty. She was playful and fun, and she put her fists up acting like she was ready to fight.

We laughed about, and ever since that day a few months ago – I always called her “my homegirl”, or “my girl”. I’d tell her boyfriend – (who also lives in the facility) – not to come downstairs without my girl. So, he’d go back and get her. We used to make each other laugh and she was such a sweet firecracker. She didn’t take no shit.

We do portions at work – for some of the tenants – where we give small bits of alcohol, so they don’t deal with the withdrawals, and there was one time I had to deny her the portion she was supposed to get because when I breathalyzed her, she was over her limit. She made me giggle when she told me, “I don’t care! I got Vodka in my room”, and she strolled away, so me denying her – didn’t matter, but I knew at least – I was doing my job.

She was spunky, usually smiling or joking around, and happy.

I never expected that a few weeks ago, I’d be taking her to the hospital because she wasn’t doing well, and we’d have our very last conversation.

On the way to the hospital, we were talking and she said something about me having an accent.

I didn’t hear her, so I asked, “I have an accent?”. I knew she said something about one, but I didn’t know what. She yelled and replied with, “YOU DO! I SAID YOU DO HAVE AN ACCENT!”. And then – she apologized for yelling it and said she’s just in a lot of pain.

She ended up being released from the hospital and coming back to the facility about 2 weeks ago and she was so angry when she said her boyfriend offered her a drink. She denied it, because she didn’t want to die. She knew it was getting serious, and the next day after her release – she was right back in the hospital for the very last time.

Her boyfriend has been walking the halls in the facility, sitting at the front by the office, or coming down just to occupy his time, get his mind of her, and kept asking if she was going to be okay. Sunday, he came up to me and asked, “She’ll get better, right?”. I knew what I SHOULD have said, but my heart broke for him and I told him, “I’m not sure. All I can tell you is that she probably won’t be back here”. He said she has a lot of dreamcatchers, and he’d like his favorite one out of her room if that’s the case, so he could remember her. I asked our lead staff if we can do that for him, and I was given permission.

My son works with me on the weekends, so he went and made sure that on Sunday, her boyfriend was able to take his favorite dreamcatcher. I also asked our nurse if she could make him a copy of Shannon’s picture from her medication box, and the nurse was all for it. 💕🥺

Last night, one of my co-workers called me and said she’s helping our boss make phone calls.

I thought I was in trouble for something, but she told me she just wanted to let me know that “Shannon passed”.

I asked if her boyfriend knew yet, and she said after phone calls, she’ll be on her way to let him know.

We’ve been dragging it out for so long and not wanting to tell him the full extent of what we knew about her, and we tried to just ease his mind and tell him very little – but yesterday – we had to fully tell him like it is, and our nurse talked to him, told him the truth, and let him go to the hospital to say his goodbyes.

This shit is never easy, especially when you work in a facility or setting where you get to know everyone, get close to people, learn their stories, know they’ve had hard lives, and then see them go through things like this – or pass.

Last night when I found out, I sat in my bedroom and shed a few tears, and then whispered, “Fly high my girl!”.

I laugh – imagining her meeting God the same way she was the day I first met her – with her fists up, pretending to want to fight and saying, “Let’s go!”. lol. Just a little humor in this dark world – where we’ll all have our day eventually.

I pray for her family. I pray for her boyfriend who has been so lost without her. I pray for my co-workers who knew her much longer than I have, and for all those who loved her.

*****

Work is so rewarding, and I love my job, but it can also be stressful and sad at times.

Saturday, my son told me one of our other tenants was on the phone and she was in tears.

I found out one of her family members passed.

As she made arrangements to go with family for a few days, she sat and waited for hours for them to come and get her and her anxiety was through the roof. When she was leaving, I opened my arms to give her a big hug. She laughed when she said she smelled like shit because she hasn’t showered yet. I told her in a funny way, “I don’t give a damn! Come give me a hug Stinky butt!”. We hugged so tight and I asked her to please take care of herself and be good while she’s gone.

I know it’s so easy for these amazing men and women to relapse when times are tough like this, or to do something stupid they may regret because they’re not fully thinking, and I hate the times I have to watch them go through things that life throws at them – when they’re already dealing with the choices they’ve made and the positions they’re in now. 💔

On the plus side – when I can make them smile, laugh, or feel like someone cares – that makes me feel good, and I love doing what I can for them.

One of the women there told me that her cat was out of food, and I know she didn’t want to tell anyone or burden anyone with it, so she kept coming to the office to get some of our Chicken packs. I went and got her cat some treats and food, and we both laughed so much when she said treats are like a drug to that cat and I asked if this means I’m her cats “drug dealer now”.

Another woman I’ve gotten close to – keeps asking for this one Maroon Puma hoodie I have because she loves it so much. I joke with her and tell her she’s not getting my hoodie, and I love it, too! Yesterday at work, I had a piece of paper that fell into my sleeve, so I took my arm out of the sleeve to shake it out and she was standing by me. She got happy and thought I was going to take the hoodie off and give it to her. 🤣 This is the second time I’ve worn it there and she tried to get it.

I love the hoodie, but today – when I go in – I am going to hand it over to her.

It’s the little things, and if I can put a smile on their faces, I’ll do what I can. If it makes their day a little brighter, I’m all for it.

I’m going to miss that hoodie! 😶 Still, her happiness will be worth it.

This is why I say Kindness is so important.

I’d love to sit here and write more, but it’s time to make sure the kids are ready for school and for me to get ready for work.

Pray that my car issues is a simple fix – as my son will be dropping me off at work and taking my car in, and that Christmas hurries up because I’m almost ready to get it over with. ha.

Love ya!

💕Shel💕

Christmas, some late-night chatter, and holiday Kindness.

Christmas, some late-night chatter, and holiday Kindness.

Shel R.4 Comments

   

   As we all know …. There’s only a few days left until Christmas.

I just started shopping for my son’s teacher and getting her gift bag together, but also – gift bags for his 2nd grade teacher (who we miss dearly since he left 2nd grade) and his Kindergarten teacher (because she was awesome as well). 😚 His 1st grade teacher moved to another state this year.

I keep in touch with his 2nd grade teacher, and she actually made me smile one day when I stopped into her classroom to say hi at the beginning of his 3rd grade year, and she told me she follows me on Tiktok. 😁 She said I make her day whenever I post, and it made me happy knowing I can do that for anyone who follows me on socials.

I just have fun with it, and post random videos.

Anyway, I’ll be getting the teachers gifts together today and then I’ll start to finish up Elijah’s Christmas goody bags for his class. We do it every year, so he can bring in some fun stuff to hand to each kid with cupcakes and juice, etc. Within the next few days, I’ll also be preparing gifts for my boss, and a few people at work, and of course – finishing up gifts from Santa – to my little dude. ❤️

When I tell you that I can’t wait to sit on the couch at midnight – when the house is silent, the kids are in bed on Christmas eve, all is finished and I can enjoy a glass of wine in peace – I MEAN THAT!!!! lol.

This year has kicked my ass and I’m so glad 2025 is almost over. When I ring in 2026 with my kids this year – I’ll shed a few tears, and smile because I got through it with my sanity, faith and many prayers.

I pray 2026 is good to me and my kids and that we have many blessings next year, because life has been a bully the last few years. Ha. I’m ready for changes, and new beginnings.

If you want to laugh… I’ve been looking for houses in suburban Illinois near my aunt and uncle (who we are close to), and I found one I absolutely love!!!

My bank does mortgage loans, and has their own home inspection agents, Real estate agents, and so on – so I applied for a mortgage loan a few days ago, and my bank called me yesterday to talk about it.

When the guy said, “Thank you for being such a great customer of ours since 2015”, I was so confused. That’s a long damn time! I’ve been saying I’ve been with my bank for 6 years, but I didn’t even realize it’s been 10! We’ll – hot damn……

 

No really! I feel old.

🤗

So, I’m approved for the mortgage loan, right?

No! No, that’s not how it works and it’s not that easy, but I wish!

Technically, they like to see that you have a stable job / income in the state you plan to move to, or at least an offer of a job in that state you plan to buy a home in – saying when you’re starting, how much you’ll make, etc. They also like to see that it’s a salary position and they can work with that – as I was told.

If I wanted to buy a house here in Minnesota, it would probably be easier – since I have that income, and I’m in the state I want to buy in, but no. I don’t want to buy here.

I work in Minnesota, so it’s hard for them to get me approved for a mortgage on this house I fell in love with in Illinois – if I’m not working in Illinois and don’t have a job offer out there, yet. I figured as much and I was expecting that, but part of me really wanted to have a house already, so that when we leave where we are now – we’re moving into our own place and not renting.

Can that still happen?  Yes!  However, I won’t be applying for jobs in Illinois or close to it – for a few months – while I wait for my daughter’s graduation to get closer. Do I expect the home buying process to be easy? Hell no! “Easy” is not how my life goes! 🤣 I’m sure the house I fell in love with – will be sold by then, but it was a nice feeling – finally finding something I truly wanted!

Hey! At least I know when I’m back in Illinois, close to it or at least have a job offer out there next year, my bank is ready to help me get a house! Maybe things won’t go as smoothly as I’d like them to, but – I trust God and if it’s meant to be, it will happen – eventually.

Listen. I’ve never wanted to own a house because I didn’t want the headaches that come with it, but after renting where I am now for almost 6 years and the stuff I’ve dealt with, I’m so ready to never have to deal with a landlord again.

So, wish me luck and pray for me as I work my ass off to get through Christmas and finish shopping, fill the kids’ stockings, and maybe fill my own with some fun things I like – and also – as I try to get through the rest of 2025 without screaming in the middle of a cornfield somewhere. (Although – that may make the end of 2025 a little better!). 🧐

It’s 2 AM and I’m awake.

I went to bed super early yesterday because it was snowing, the roads were icy, and I didn’t feel like driving anywhere. My son’s – made me smile when they used the projector I gave them as an early Christmas gift – to play video games together all day – on the wall – where they set it up, and my daughter did laundry and watched movies because both of my kids had a snow day (a day off school) yesterday.

………. Which is why I was in bed early, and why I’m up at 2 AM.

I’ll eventually go back to sleep, but until I do – here I am – entertaining you! (Are you up right now with me?).

In other news, right after the holidays are over – I’ll be catching up on different things, working on getting my car fixed and paying it off to trade it in, and probably packing up the rest of our things we don’t use or need right now – to be ready to move.

Life is about to go really fast for us, and I’m hoping our new adventures all work out and treat us kindly.

My daughter will be looking at colleges soon and getting into an EMS program. She’ll be working on getting her permit (She was so close but failed a few times) and got discouraged…. but life goes on, we try things again and never give up.

I’ve thought about home-schooling my little dude and that’s something I’m looking into next year (as one of my good friends highly encouraged it) because she used to home school her kids for years and loved it. She made me laugh because she just recently sent her kids to public school after being against it for so long and she’s the one who finally got me into to thinking about home-schooling. I asked her why she put her kids in school and she made me laugh when she said she never gets time alone to herself, and her kids need to socialize and make actual friends besides the ones on the local baseball team.

There’s a lot of changes happening next year, a lot of decisions will be made – from colleges for the daughter, to possibly trying home-schooling the little dude and getting him on a baseball team (as he wants to do so badly), maybe buying a house, a career change as I finally try to get into my dream job – and upgrading the vehicle.

We all know plans don’t work out the way we want them to or plan for them to, and that God is in control, so while all of the planning is great and I have an idea of how I want 2026 to go, God may have other plans and I just have to continue to keep my sanity, faith and prayers going.

I was watching “The War room” on Netflix yesterday and the way Ms. Clara yelled:

I think I’ll be alright in 2026 – as the last few years have been hell.

I hope God fights for me in every area of my life next year.

I trust God to take us into 2026 with all the blessings we deserve, and I just have to trust that if I go him in prayer, he’ll fight for me and he’ll make next year a lot better than the last few. I’m manifesting it!

Baby, we should all have a “WAR ROOM”, and go to God with all our battles, worries, problems, etc. and then get out of the way to let him handle everything.

It’s a cute movie by the way.

May I also say that I think we all need a “Ms. Clara” in our lives?!!!!

Enough about 2026 though – I hope and pray that as Christmas and New Year’s rolls around; you find yourself in good health, happy, ready to make needed changes, make better decisions, and ready to celebrate all the blessings you have in your life.

I hope you get to spend it with family, friends, loved ones – and that you all have a safe and great holiday season. ❤️

Later, I’ll be sitting on the floor going through all the gifts I brought the kids and making sure they each have an equal amount. Usually – I count as I wrap and place them under the tree, but I didn’t do that this year.

I’ll also be shopping for Christmas dinner, and since we didn’t do a Turkey for Thanksgiving because the kids wanted Chicken tacos – we’re doing a Turkey for Christmas. I plan to try my hand at a sweet potato casserole, and my mom used to make this delicious cake / chocolate pudding / cool whip / nuts dessert that my kids absolutely loved and miss, so I plan to try to make it like she did.

I truly wish I knew how to make my grandma (Yia-Yia’s) lumpy chocolate pudding, but I used to ask her for the recipe, and she used to joke that she was taking it with her to the grave. I miss that!!! She DID take it with her to the grave, and I never found out how she made it so good with lumps of Chocolate in it. She made it for me on many holidays when I’d ask her for it.

I miss my mom’s veggie pizza, and I may try to make that as well.

I miss the way holidays used to be when everyone was alive, happy, and always got together for these special occasions. 🥺

Anyway – as I finish up shopping, prepare to shop for Christmas dinner and dessert, put gifts together and wrap, and finally get to celebrate with a glass of wine on Christmas Eve – I pray all of you have a blessed one, and that if life is kicking your ass like it is mine – that you take everything to God in prayer, move out of the way and let him handle it for you.

I hope he does.

I know a lot of people are struggling right now, but if you have your health, a few close people, and you’re still alive – be grateful!

Let me also finish this by saying that if you’re in a position to help those who are struggling or dealing with life right now and you know they’re having a rough time, PLEASE offer to help where and when you can.

Some single parents are stretching their budgets and letting some bills go to make Christmas magical for their kids. Some people are in hospitals and won’t be home for Christmas, or overseas. Some people are going through divorces, losing everything they have, or can’t go home to be with family – so just be kind to everyone because you never know what someone is dealing with, or what they had to go through to make it through the holiday season this year.

Recently, I was talking to a good friend of mine and she mentioned she is always helping others, but nobody helps her. She said she has such a big heart and a weak spot for those who need anything, and when she needs something, nobody jumps in to help or offers their assistance. I told her I know the feeling, because I’ve helped so many and I could be at my lowest and those who I know could have helped – watched me struggle instead.

We talked about Karma and how we’re waiting for our good Karma to come back around to us that we’ve dished out for others, and I told her, “Maybe Karma isn’t here on earth for us! Maybe our good Karma is when we pass, and God opens the gates of heaven for us, no questions asked because he knows what we’ve done for others here on earth, and that will be our good Karma. Making it into heaven, and God not even blinking an eye when he ushers us in”.

We giggled about it, but it’s the truth.

So, never stop being a good person – even if nobody is around to help you when you need it.

HELP SOMEONE THIS HOLIDAY SEASON and if you see them struggling – don’t wait for them to ask. Just be a good person and do something nice for them!

For those grieving this holiday season – I know the feeling, and I’m sending you such big hugs, and lots of love, but can you imagine the huge celebration and laughter that heaven has – with all of our loved ones up there?! They’re not missing earth, and for that – I smile. 💕 You should, too!

Let me get out of here and go back to bed. I have to be up early to get the kids to school, and go get the teacher’s gifts ready, as I rush to finish gifts from Santa as I said, plan dinner – and just making the last weeks of 2025 – bearable.

Again, do something kind for others this holiday season and be nice – even if it’s just paying for someone’s meal, buying them a coffee if you’re in front of them in line at the local Starbucks, or visiting a local shelter and donating some food, gifts, etc.

I love ya!

❤️Shel❤️

Deadlines met, more money spent, Senior assassin plans, and work.

Deadlines met, more money spent, Senior assassin plans, and work.

Shel R.2 Comments

You have to have humor in life, right?!

Good morning and let me make you laugh a bit.

I dropped off my little guy at school this morning and as I was driving around the block to drop my daughter off at the high school, she said her friend wanted a ride. I swung around to get her friend and parked in the high school parking lot.

Me: I am absolutely down to look at LIFE 360 and do a drive-by or five on the days that I don’t work.

My daughter started naming her friends, and says, “We can all jump out of the car, do our thing, and jump back in. You’re the get-away driver!”. We laughed about it, and we laughed even more when my daughter’s friend says, “I feel like I’m listening to something I shouldn’t be involved in. I’m out of here!”. Her friend was laughing as she got out of the car, knowing what I was talking about.

We were talking about SENIOR ASSASSIN!

The class of 2026 has been planning it the last few days, taking votes on if they want to do water or gel pellet guns, and my daughter is so excited to be a part of this. 🤣 This is a game played in many states all over the world – where Seniors go around shooting their fellow Senior classmates with either water or gel pellet guns – in order to “assassinate” or eliminate each other.

There are only two rules.

They can’t get each other on school grounds, or – at one of their places of employment.

Anywhere else – is fair game.

They are currently voting on if they should all download LIFE 360, add each other to it, and have fun knowing where certain classmates are – to go get them.

When my daughter went on her Senior class trip a few months ago, she brought herself a very small water gun to have fun with, and I looked at her funny when she said she’s going to use that if they decide on water guns – for Senior assassin. I told her she better let me take her to the store and buy her a couple of huge SUPER SOAKERS! We both laughed and I told her, “Go big or go home!”. 😁

In all seriousness, my daughter hates social situations, and she doesn’t like to be around a lot of people because of her anxiety, so I am so happy she’s excited about this, and plans to participate. I was totally joking about the “getaway driver” thing – (unless other parents are participating as well), and then I’m totally down for it. ha. She’s been talking about it for days now, as all of the Seniors try to figure out what they want to use, when they plan to start it, and how it’s going to go.

We also just turned in all of her Yearbook deadline stuff.

The photo of her when she was little:

This will be in the Yearbook I believe, but also on the screen at graduation as they show the “then and now” photos of the class of 2026.

We turned in her Senior photo she picked for the Yearbook – after taking tons of photos the past few weeks. She and I both loved this one:

She turned in her Senior wills, which says what she’ll leave behind and to whom.

She said she was going to leave her Sassiness to her best friend, Riley – and her Silliness to her good friend, Logan.

She turned in her 10-year prophecy, which is where she sees herself in 10 years, and she said in 10 years, she’ll be saving lives as a Paramedic, living in California – hopefully with a few dogs. 🥰

She also had to turn in a Senior quote that goes under her Senior photo in the yearbook, and as we sat at the kitchen table searching for the perfect quotes or one that she liked, I cried like a baby.

I’m not ready for this! 🥺🤣

We went through many quotes, and each one just made me cry more.

Hers is, “We leave behind a trail of laughter, love, and a little bit of craziness”, and then she added, “Thank you for all the laughs“.

It was cute. It was simple. It works!

With everything turned in and deadlines met finally – I THOUGHT I was finished, but parents of Seniors know – that we are NEVER finished when we think we are. Yearbooks have to be paid for, and class rings have to be picked out and purchased.

Graduation outfits have to be shopped for – be it a tux for the Senior boys, or for us girl parents – dresses.

More money is involved, and it’s never ending – all the way up until graduation day, when we can finally sit back – relax and watch all of our hard work – pay off – as our Seniors walk the final walk – and get their diplomas. ❤️

AND THEN – IT’S MORE MONEY and it doesn’t end there because most of them will go on to college and need all kinds of new things. lol. Are we ready Senior parents?!!!!!!!

So, we’re almost done with Senior year, and all the madness and fun that comes along with it, and I’ve started getting emails for colleges, scholarships, grants, different financial stuff for her when she does go to college. She’s been getting different college packages in the mail as well – with colleges wanting her to come check out their schools.

She has decided on the University of Michigan, but I told her not to limit her choices to just one, and to check out multiple colleges before making any decisions, depending on if she still wants to do Paramedic or not – next year.

*****

My little guy just also had his Christmas concert, and it was only 20 minutes long.

I was surprised because in the recent years, it’s been longer, but it was still cute and fun.

He was one of the dancers, and he danced with a little girl. I wish I could upload videos here, but I would have to upload them to YouTube and grab them from there – and that’s a whole headache. He did a great job, though!

It broke my heart a little because it was his very last Christmas concert at this school, and I believe if all goes well – we’re moving next year, so it’s bitter-sweet to see my daughter almost ready to graduate from this school, and my son do his last concert here.

This school has been wonderful, and it’s sad to leave it, but we’re on to new adventures next year.

*****

As for me, I’ve just been working and enjoying my down time when I can.

I love my job!

Despite working in a facility that houses some of the roughest people and helping them get through some of their toughest times, I enjoy it and anything I can do to put a smile on their faces, or make them feel like someone cares – I’ll do it.

The amazing and popular rapper (Eminem) has a song called “Houdini”, and in the middle of it, he says, “F*** my own kids! They’re brats!”. His daughters are grown now – (one his own and the other two being adopted by him when they were little), and I thought it was the cutest thing when the video shows them on the phone / Facetime – acting shocked when he says that. It was pretty funny.

After that song came out, the internet and TikTok went crazy with his daughter, Hailey Jade – and others doing the sound that says, “I’m like, what’d he say F*** me for?”. It came from 50 cent from what I heard, but everyone used it as a joke to the Houdini song.

So, at work last week – I walked in super early and one of the older guys who live in the facility (Donny) I’ll call him – wanted something he usually gets at 8 AM – earlier. Sometimes, if I’m there early, I don’t see a big deal in giving it to him early because he’s a good guy and he behaves well. Sometimes – if one of our picky lead staff members are there, I just can’t do it. So, on this one day – he was down there, and he was yelling about how he’s tired of being treated like he’s a kid, and he was angry that one lead staff wouldn’t give him what he wanted, so he threw a fit.

He yelled, “F*** ALL OF YOU!”. I was working. My son was working. The one lead staff we try to avoid – was working. Later on, she walked away, and I called him downstairs to get what he was looking for and told him that he knows I always give him what he asks for, as long as I’m there and I can do it. I told him he didn’t need to yell at me when he knows I do what I can for him, and he apologized, so – I made him laugh when I said, “I’m like, what’d he say F*** me for?” – in the same tone TikTok uses for that sound.

We both laughed as he walked away.

We have another guy I’ll call “Bobby”. Bobby can be tough to deal with if he’s not sober, and sometimes he’ll listen, sometimes – he’s just ready to throw insults, punches, whatever he can. When he’s sober, he’s a decent guy to talk to.

At work a few weeks ago, my boss asked me to hand out Christmas wish lists for our tenants to fill out – for things they want for Christmas. Everyone turned theirs in over the last few weeks – except Bobby, so I planned to chase him down a few days ago – to see if he could turn his in. I didn’t have to though, as he came to the front desk and handed me his.

I opened it and it said he didn’t want anything for himself. Just a 1/2 dozen roses for his lady, Mary.

I thought that was the cutest, sweetest thing – but then again, there’s time where one of us staff members have to go break up arguments between him and Mary, and they have this weird, funny Love / hate relationship. Still, they both make me smile when they’re together and they both pick on each other and have their little arguments.

I don’t have favorite tenants, but one of my funniest ones – is a guy I’ll call Tony. He’s hilarious. He’s full of energy and I think I talked about him before. The one who made me my flower vase when I first started at this facility. I forgot what I called him back then, but for this – I’m calling him Tony.

I watch the cameras sometimes, and I’ll see him on one – and then next thing I know – he’s 10 cameras over, and I’m wondering how he got to the other side of the building so fast.

The other day, he had me laughing – as I watched him do laundry for FIVE entire hours. FIVE – because he was taking his sweet time folding his clothes so carefully, hanging them, cleaning the washers and dryers, and doing other things in the laundry room. Trying to fix the sink, picking things up from the floor, cleaning the floor, and things he didn’t go in there to do.

Not to mention that he left his breakfast on the water fountain, and someone else started eating off of his plate, so I had to bring it into the office to hold it for him, while Mr. “Take other people’s food” – walked around looking for where the plate went – that he was stealing off of, and I watched that on the cameras as I giggled to myself.

I love these people.

I’ve grown to know all of them. They’ve grown to know and trust me, and also my son when he’s there on the weekends, and I love working in this facility. Every day brings new laughter, new adventures here, and a lot of times when I’m looking for ways to make their life easier, their days brighter, and joke with them to give them laughter.

They’ve been through a lot!

In a world where society and the town judge them and knows all of the negative things about the people who live in this facility, I like to find the good in all of them, see the positivity they hold, and get to know them on a personal level. My job isn’t just for a paycheck. It’s to show these people that in a world full of hate and judgement, I’m not one of those people who do that. I care.

I will say that I pissed off one of the tenants yesterday and I can cross that off my “to-do” list. lol.

Just kidding. I don’t have a to-do list that states, “Piss of a tenant”, but I thought it was a funny thought.

She was angry that she felt like someone stole her laundry, but upon checking the cameras, I didn’t see anything and asked if she is sure she didn’t grab her laundry on another day and forget. I can honestly say that I was NOT her favorite staff member – as she screamed at me the 4th time she came and told me about her clothes missing, and that someone in the building stole them.

After she screamed at me and walked away, I knew I just had to let it roll off my shoulders, and that it was nothing personal. I knew that I wasn’t the first staff member she had went off on, and I won’t be the last. She’s one of our very much louder tenants, and when I’m at work, I try to be as polite with her as possible, get her whatever she needs, and call it a day.

I’ve learned all of their personalities, their flaws, their likes and dislikes, the ones you can joke with and the ones we kind of just have to say, “What do you need?” – take care of and keep it moving with.

On the plus side, I just found out that one of our other tenants that I’ll call Bryce – knows how to play songs on the Harmonica. That was pretty cool, and while he was a little tipsy yesterday, he knew I had this big project I was working on for my boss, and he stood by the front desk, played songs on the Harmonica, and it was actually nice.

I enjoyed listening to him as I did this project, and it was soothing.

Everyone I deal with there on a daily basis – I have grown to love, care about, and respect because they’re still standing. They still keep going, and they try their best to get through another day – no matter what cards in life they’ve been dealt. ❤️

*****

In other news – my car is an a-hole, and I’ve been trying to see if I can trade it in for a family SUV.

There’s something going on with my throttle, or sensors – whatever I’ve read on it, and I’ll be taking it to the shop next week to see what’s going on. I joked that my car is going to throw me into a brick wall – because it keeps doing this thing where it feels like it wants to accelerate by itself when my foot isn’t even on the gas, and sometimes – it feels like it wants to give up.

I did call a dealer this morning because I used to have a Ford Explorer and I absolutely LOVED IT, so I did tell the guy if one comes in – let me know. He gave me his cell phone number and told me that when I have a down payment ready, to come on in and he’ll take care of me. We ran some numbers, and he asked if I was looking for a Tahoe, Escalade, etc. I did tell him I don’t want anything huge, but I do need something bigger than what I have now, and I am looking to trade in my a-hole car. 😁

Christmas is almost here. I still have to buy gifts from Santa to the little dude, and hopefully early next year, I can trade this car in for something else. Until then – it’s going to keep being an a-hole, and I’m going to keep buying scratch-off tickets and hope I win big on one of them.

haha. Joking.

Love ya!

❤️Shel❤️

When sshhhh goes wrong… and a great Christmas movie.

When sshhhh goes wrong… and a great Christmas movie.

Shel R.Leave a comment

A few nights ago, I couldn’t sleep.

A friend of mine had told me about a cute movie she watched and wanted me to check out, so – since I couldn’t sleep and she knows I like different Christmas movies around this time of year, I watched the one she suggested.

I’m not sure if it’s streaming anywhere else, but I watched it on YouTube.

It seemed like a Hallmark movie, and I’m not really a Hallmark movie – kind of gal, but I actually like this movie.

You have to pay attention to really know what’s going on, but I recommend it if you’re looking for something cute to watch. ❤️

It has some great actors / actresses, such as Paul Walker and Robin Williams (God rest their souls), Susan Sarandon, Penelope Cruz, Chaz Palminteri, and others.

Paul Walker plays a super jealous and controlling cop, who doesn’t want any man around his fiancé or even looking at her, and she’s ready to leave him if he doesn’t change his crazy ways. She truly does love him and wants everything to work out – especially because it’s Christmas, and she doesn’t want to leave him during Christmas.

Susan Sarandon’s mother is battling Alzheimer’s / Dementia and won’t eat, and while she loves spending time with her mom every year, things are getting worse, and it’s become an awful Christmas for her – watching her mother go through all of this, as she watches the man across the hall from her mother’s room – fight for his life.

There’s an elderly man in this movie who is obsessed with Paul Walker’s character and at first – the movie makes it seem likes he’s gay and wants to be with “Mike” – (Paul’s character), but that’s not the case at all, and it made me cry when I found out why he’s so obsessed with Mike.

What Mike does for this man to heal his heart and soul – teaches him something about himself and his own jealousy and the way he’s acting with his fiancé.

The movie is good. I’d watch it again.

So, when I couldn’t sleep a few nights ago, that’s what I watched, and I enjoyed it.

If you watch it, let me know what you think.

*****

In other news, my son and I had our very first work meeting this week.

I work all week long and on the weekends. My son just works the weekends with me, but this meeting was mandatory for most staff.

We got updates on some of our tenants in the building. We got updates on whatever we needed to know. We talked about different things, the work Christmas party next week, things that need to be done during shifts, and so on.

Staff was able to voice our thoughts, ideas, concerns, etc.

My son and I stayed quiet because again, this was our first meeting since working at this facility and we just wanted to take it all in, see what goes on in these meetings, and who says what.

One thing that did make me want to speak up and go against something – was when one of my older co-workers said something about possibly putting up a sign that says nobody can hang out in the hallways because she’s tired of kicking people out of the halls, and nobody listens. They keep doing it anyway. If there’s a sign saying they can’t – maybe, they’ll finally understand it.

I disagreed with that because it’s winter. It’s freezing outside, and sometimes the weather is -10, -20, -30 – out here, and kicking people out in the cold, just doesn’t sit right with me. It’s not the kind of person I am and it’s not the way my heart is. Not to mention that while I’m on my shift, or my son and I are both working together – we don’t care if people are hanging out in the hallways because they’re safe, they’re warm, and they live in the building – WE DON’T! So, for us to kick them out of any part of their home – when we just work in this facility – doesn’t sit right with us.

I wanted to say all of that, but I didn’t.

I knew that if my boss agreed to put a sign up saying they can’t hang out in the hallways, and we still let them – (because I was still going to let them), it would be mixed signals because different staff let them do different things, and we wouldn’t all be on the same page.

Here’s the thing.

The facility I work in – as I said before – houses people who are homeless or were once homeless before they were accepted into this facility. It’s a big building and they each have their own little apartments.

This facility houses not only homeless people, but also alcoholics and those with drug addictions, and mental health issues. This facility houses some criminals who committed different minor crimes and have nowhere to go after their release, or those who have no family / friends to go to. We have people from all walks of life in this facility, and they lean on each other. They’re friends with each other. They enjoy hanging out with and seeing each other, because for some of them – the people who live there, are all they have.

The problem is – there’s two sides to this huge building.

There’s the side where the tenants are more independent, can work, go do whatever they please, come and go, etc. as long as they stay out of trouble and follow the rules of their leases, and of the facility. Then, there’s the side where people are more dependent, need alcohol portion control, are dealing with withdrawals, dealing with mental health things, and just need more care, and compassion.

The staff office – is right in the middle of both sides, so both sides can come and talk to the staff, or get what they need, but both sides are locked – and these tenants know that one side can’t go to the other sides lobby. So they call each other from the lobby phones, meet outside, or – in these hallways they have right by the office if it’s cold outside like it has been.

During the meeting, when my older co-worker asked if a sign can be placed, I was so happy when my boss said she’s on the fence about doing that, and she feels different about it.

She said as long as they’re not causing problems, fighting or drinking in the hallways, and as long as they’re not blocking the way to get in and out – it doesn’t bother her. She said she would much rather have them hanging out in the hallways safe and warm – than to be out and about wherever they’ll find to go to be warm and hang out and possibly get into trouble while they’re out and about.

She said she’d rather deal with them in the halls, than having the police calling the building saying, “Hey, you need to come get your guy”, or have one of them out and about drinking, and freeze to death.

I absolutely agreed with my boss, and I loved that she spoke up and said something because I was on the same page as my boss.

I was happy when the Case manager chimed in and said a sign probably wouldn’t matter anyway, because many of the people who live in the facility have had a “F*** You” attitude since they were little, and all they’re going to do – is become combative and give attitude if there’s a sign. They’re doing that now if they get kicked out of the hallways. So, it’s probably not even worth it.

I agreed with that as well.

It’s all about picking and choosing your battles and kicking them out of hallways of somewhere THEY LIVE – as I said – it’s not right.

I also wanted to speak up when one of the lead staff – said something about how people also aren’t allowed to be in the hallways if they don’t live here and just want to come in to warm up because they live on the streets. She said if that’s the case, they have TWO MINUTES to warm up, and get out, or – we can “slowly” help them fill out a housing application, and then – they have to go.

Part of me so badly wanted to kind of joke – but kind of seriously tell her, “You better hope you get into heaven when you die, and God doesn’t just give you TWO MINUTES to look around and tell you that you have to go!”.

I was so mad. I couldn’t believe how heartless she sounded. I wish I would have said something, but again, I didn’t, because I knew I wasn’t going to follow her TWO MINUTE RULLE anyway, and I was so proud of my boss and so happy when she spoke up again and said for her – it would be different.

She said for her being a human – she knows what she would want someone to do for her if she were in that same position, and if someone comes in off the streets to get warm, she will treat them like another human. She said she wouldn’t care if they slept in the hallways if that meant they have a warm place to be – even for one night. She said she’d offer a pair of warm gloves, a hat, whatever we have for whenever they want to leave, and one of my other co-workers mentioned giving them a cup of hot coffee.

YES!!!!!!

That’s how it should be!!!!!

If I’m ever at work and a homeless person comes in and needs to warm up, I’m grabbing that cup of coffee for them, having them sit down by our heaters, pulling up a chair next to them, and letting them keep me company as we chat, because I don’t have the heart for that “TWO MINUTES” crap. My boss said she’d much rather get in trouble by the higher up’s or whoever – for being a good person, than to have to treat another human like they’re below her, and I loved that!

Same.

Last week – I gave some of our “good gloves” at work to a few of the people who live there, and my son said something about how he thinks they’re Christmas gifts for those who ask for it on their wish lists.

First of all – gloves should not be on a WISH LIST. They should automatically be given out because that’s something that’s NEEDED in this weather, so if those gloves sitting in the closet were for the wish list – and I get in trouble for giving them out to people who NEED them, I’ll deal with that and take it with a smile.

My boss said in the meeting – that she’d back us up no matter what we decided to do in any situation, and that we have to use our best judgements and our common human sense. If I get in trouble for letting people hang out in the hallways to stay warm and safe, O-well. If I get in trouble for doing good things for people who live there, O-well. If I get in trouble if some homeless person comes in off the streets and wants to sleep in the halls to stay warm – O-well.

I know my boss will back me up, and that’s what matters. She has the same good heart I do.

I was bothered that this other lead staff literally sat there joking about her little TWO MINUTE rule, and they have to go. She had a smile on her face and said if they don’t live here, they don’t belong there and that’s it.

My face while she was talking – was something like:

My son tried not to laugh because he knew I was mad.

It takes ZERO EFFORT OR DOLLARS to be a good human being, and she doesn’t seem like she’s it.

After the meeting, I shared my concerns with my boss and I let her know – one on one – that I’m not kicking nobody out if they need to get warm, and that I don’t care who hangs out in the hallways if they’re not fighting, drinking or causing issues. She agreed with me, and again – I’m glad she backs me and the idea of being a good person – up.

I can’t promise I’ll stay quiet in future meetings, but I will say that from now on – I plan to stand up for what’s right and what’s wrong.

I love my job, and when it comes to rules and policies, I’ll follow them to an extent. When it comes to being a good person, helping others, showing love – compassion and kindness – I’ll bend the rules and policies if I have to, and I won’t apologize for it. 😶 There’s some circumstances where it’s okay to say, “We’re not supposed to do this, but….”.

So, my son and I survived our first work meeting – despite me having to bite my tongue and stay quiet on certain things I disagreed with or wanted to speak up on.

*****

On my side of this small little town, I’m just working, counting down the months until my daughter graduates’ high school and we can move.

I’m starting to get rid of things we don’t use, need or want – so packing will be faster and a little easier, and trying to STILL get graduation photos done, things turned in on time for her deadlines, etc. We’ve done some graduation photos, and she doesn’t like them, so we’re going to try again this weekend and by Tuesday of next week, everything should be turned in for the yearbooks and deadlines.

That’s a lot, right?! MAMA NEEDS A FEW NAPS. ha.

Today is my little guy’s Christmas concert at school and I’m looking forward to that.

He told me if I cry, he’s just going to “pretend” to sing, and not really sing. lol.

I work this weekend. I work next week. We were supposed to go to Illinois the end of this month for a few days to be with family, but I have things to do, to catch up on, and I just can’t.

Besides all of that….

Let me share how awesome my older son is!

I had to run to the store yesterday for a new pair of jeans and a new pair of shoes.

He offered to pay for my shoes. I told him I have the money, and he replied with, “I know, but I wanted to get you a Christmas gift from Amazon, and it won’t arrive on time, so let me just buy you the shoes you want”. I told him I wasn’t getting anything fancy right now because it’s winter, but he insisted – so, I let him. He called it my early Christmas gift, and I’m okay with that. 😁❤️

He really is a great kid!

After we ran to a few stores and grabbed Starbucks, we were on the way home and I felt my car driving a little bumpy. I pulled over and asked my son to check my tires, and when he did – he shook his head.

I knew I had a flat. I was so irritated because I’m a single mom. It’s almost Christmas. I have other things to buy or pay, and now I have to get a new tire on top of it???!!!

I couldn’t help it, and I was so stressed, drained and irritated – that I cried.

I didn’t just cry. I sat in the car and sobbed. Big tears. I was a wreck.

I saw this a few weeks back and didn’t think much of it until yesterday when I needed a new tire – on top of everything else going on, and I thought about this again.

I just laid my head back on my headrest, looked up and wondered what the hell God is doing up there, and why I just can’t feel like I’m getting ahead of anything.

My son was calm.

He changed my tire to the spare, and I was able to make it to the tire shop I always go to whenever I need tire work done.

I’m pretty sure I need an alignment, but they couldn’t do it yesterday, so I have to go back and that’s even more money.

$167 I didn’t plan to spend on the tire, and just like that – more money gone.

You know what I want for Christmas? A F***IN’ DAY WHERE EVERYTHING IS PAID, I DON’T HAVE TO GO ANYWHERE, I HAVE A BOTTLE OF GOOD WINE, I’M BORED OUT OF MY MIND BECAUSE I HAVE NOTHING TO DO AND NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT, AND LIFE IS GOOD!

I’m sure that’s the wish of every single mama out there though.

Hell, I’m sure that’s the wish of every person dealing with anything right now.

Listen. I’m blessed that God still has me on this earth with my kids, and my other three kids here on this earth with me, so I can’t really complain.

Other than that, I don’t have much else going on right now.

I just dyed my hair.

I know I said I wasn’t going to do that.

My silver / gray was showing through my dark brown / black hair, and I wanted to see how it would look if I finally fully went silver / gray. My daughter said it looked pretty cool, but with my son’s Christmas concert in a bit, I decided to go in with cut hair and a new color. 😊

Have a beautiful day loves!

❤️Shel❤️