Good morning my darlings.

(Photo above – is thanks to Chica Dibujo cafe on Pinterest).

I’ve actually just started getting back into Pinterest lately and I love it.

I finally have a day off.

I’m sitting at the kitchen table enjoying a cup of coffee and semi-silence.

I say semi-silence because my little guy is playing his video games in the living room, but he has the T.V. on low, so I can still think. ha.

I’m just going to share whatever is on my heart and in my mind today, and some funnies of course!

Let’s start with Friday and what it’s like being a working mom. 🤔

So-called sick and the NIPPLE PIERCINGS story:

You’re probably like – WHAT THE HELL?!

Wait for it!

So, on Friday – I ended up working for one of the lead staff who didn’t feel like going in because she was going through burnout, and I get that, so I went in for her. Plus, I could always use the extra money.

That morning, my little dude tried to stay home from school and say he didn’t feel well – because he heard that his good friend he plays online with – was able to stay home because HE didn’t feel well. I giggled and told him, “Absolutely NOT – because even if you stay home from school, you’re not playing video games when you say you don’t feel well”. He went to school.

I was sitting at work, and the school nurse called me. She said my little dude didn’t feel good, and she wanted to know if she could give him some medicine and send him back to class. I giggled and told her how he tried to stay home that morning and why, and I said he was fine. She had no doubt he was fine because he had no fever, and he wasn’t sneezing, coughing, etc. She tried to put his mind at ease by giving him some medicine and sending him back to class, telling him that if anything else was wrong – he could come back.

An hour later, my older son messages me and says that my daughter tried to call me, but I didn’t answer. She wanted him to get ahold of me – to let me know that she was caught with her cell phone and it was taken away.

I asked if he was serious and he said yes.

As I’m trying to work – I’m dealing with knowing that my little dude is going to go right back to the nurse and try to come home again, and now I had to deal with my daughter and this phone situation.

For those who don’t know – her high school is one of the schools that implemented these goofy Yondr pouches that students have to lock their cell phones in while at school, and they get them unlocked at the end of the day. If you don’t know – I’ve been against these things from the beginning of this new rule years ago, and I tried to tell the principal that my daughter is NOT putting her phone in the pouch, and she WILL be keeping it on her.

I’m all for my daughter following rules and listening to authority, but this is one rule I didn’t want to play by.

As a parent who already lost one child, my mama heart is so scared to not be able to get ahold of my kids – wherever they are – if they’re out of my sight.

We have a town siren that goes off for three reasons. A tornado / bad weather, when it’s noon, and calling for volunteer firefighters when something happens. So, whenever it goes off – my daughter will message me and say she’s fine and everything is fine if she’s at school. It makes me feel better, puts my mind at ease, and I don’t have to call the office for every little thing to make sure everything is good.

She’s had her phone in her sports bra for the last few years, and it’s worked out great.

I felt even better when I found out that other parents were making sure their students put their phones in their belt buckles, in their back pockets, in their boots, or wherever they needed to hide it. Some kids have used burner phones to put in the pouches and kept their real phones on them. So, I’m not the only parent who doesn’t agree with these Yondr pouches, and truthfully – if I were a principal – there wouldn’t be any Yondr pouches.

If something were to happen, I’d much rather have a bunch of worried and concerned parents in the parking lot – that remain calm and let the police do their jobs – because they’ve been able to reach their students by cell phones and know their child is okay – rather than a bunch of parents losing their minds pushing past police – and trying to find their kids.

I’ve tried to fight this policy, and it went nowhere.

The school has told me that students can call their parents from the office phone, but what if something happens or there’s a lockdown, and they can’t get to the office phone? I’ve argued that as well, and they had no real answers for me, but they insisted they were keeping the pouches as a new policy years ago.

Anyway, my daughter isn’t the only one who has had her phone on her for years. So, when I called the school on Friday, the office lady – (who I get along just fine with) told me she isn’t the only one who was caught. She giggled a bit and said there’s piles of phones in the office from students who were caught as well, and that if I wanted to come get her phone, I could do so.

One of the other lead staff at work was amazing at looking out for me and told me to go. I told her I’d be right back.

So, I drove to the school, went inside and as soon as I saw the principal, I smiled and joked with her. I asked how those Yondr pouches are working out for her – because obviously if that many students had their phones on them, they found ways around it, and they’re going to continue to find ways around it. I asked if she was still going to continue to use them, and she said she thinks they’re working on great and plans to continue to use them. She also said it’s her job to continue to search students.

She smiled and told me that my daughter tried telling her over and over again that she has NIPPLE PIERCINGS, and that’s why the wand went off when they wanded her. No, my daughter does NOT and will NEVER have NP’s, but I giggled when the principal told me this. My daughter joked a few times that she’d say that if she ever got wanded, but I didn’t know she’d actually say it, and she did.

When I talked to my daughter, she said she would have stuck to that story, but she felt bad because the principal tilted her head a bit, and told my daughter, “Lani, please make job easier”. So, my daughter – (who has always been taught to be honest and tell the truth) – took out her phone and handed it to the principal. The principal thanked her for being honest finally and told her that her phone would be in the office.

I asked the principal why my daughter was even wanded, and I was told that they had a K-9 (drug and gun sniffing dog) come in that day – that went to all the classes for searches, and I know they do that randomly, so it’s common for them to do these things. She said any student who wasn’t able to take off their hoodie or didn’t want to – got wanded, and my daughter didn’t have a T-shirt under her hoodie, so she’s one of the ones who couldn’t and got wanded. The wand of course – beeped, and it wasn’t because of any piercings of course!

From what I hear, students are already coming up with new, creative ways to hide their phones, so do I think this is going to stop it? No. Do I think they’re just going to get better at hiding them? Yes.

Thankfully, the students that got caught with phones – aren’t in trouble, but I do think that the school is going to be more aware, do more searches, and keep on top of this from now on. Again, I know it’s wrong for going against the school policy all these years – but it has given me peace of mind that if something happens – I can easily contact my daughter because she has her phone, and she has felt better having her phone on her because there’s been times things are going on, parents get no calls, and my daughter has been able to message me.

Example:

The high school went into lockdown a few years back because there were four fights going on at once – that turned into a big group brawl on the first floor from what I heard.

Parents did get calls that day – that the school was on lockdown, and I was a nervous wreck. I tried calling my daughter over and over because I knew she had her phone, and she wasn’t answering. I didn’t even care if I got a ticket that day, but I was on my way home from the nearest city and stepped on the gas to get to the school. If a cop tried to stop me, he could write me a ticket at the school, but as a parent – my heart dropped and I was so worried.

Thankfully – BECAUSE MY DAUGHTER HAD HER CELL PHONE ON HER – she was able to message me and tell me, “Mom, I’m okay. I’m on the 2nd floor. They won’t let anyone down or anyone come up”. She was also able to text me when the lockdown lifted, and she was in her next class, so I was able to slow down, do the speed limit and I felt so much better.

Thus – the reason they should do away with these Yondr pouches.

Some parents love them and agree with it. I’m not one of those parents. HELL, I’ve seen teachers disagree with the policy. So, we all have our different opinions. Anyway, I just thought the Nipple piercing story she really did try to give – was hilarious.

I got her phone and went back to work. As soon as I pulled into the parking lot, my phone rings and it’s the school nurse stating that my son is back in her office, and says he has a headache and wants to throw up. I shook my head and laid my head back on my headrest in the car – because being a working parent – is not for the weak, and parenting never stops – even when you’re at work. I told the nurse to let me talk to him, and I convinced him to go back to class, try to finish the day, and that it’s Friday, so if he doesn’t feel good – he has all weekend to rest.

He played video games all weekend with no issues and hasn’t complained once – about not feeling well. 🤣

****

Work and attachment:

You all know I work in a facility that houses the once homeless, some criminals, drug and alcohol addicts.

I’ve talked about it before. You also know how much I love my job if you’ve followed my blog and have read it for so long.

Yes, there’s days that are wild and I don’t get to sit down and catch a break, and there’s some days that are a lot of fun. There are some days that are super boring and nothing happens at all, so I get to sit down, relax, and just kick back until it’s time to leave.

This weekend – was insane.

We have a little elderly woman that I’ll call “Daisy”. I absolutely love Daisy and she’s become like an aunt to me. I joked that I was just there recruiting my new family. She gives words of wisdom, and she’s hilarious when she wants to be, but she’s also a little firecracker and you’d never know that she could wreck so much havoc just by looking at her. Some people describe her as “dangerous”.

Still, she makes me laugh and drives me crazy all at the same time. 😁

I’ve grown to adore her, and to watch the cameras closely when she’s out and about because she WILL cause trouble. lol. It’s wild that I say those two things in the same sentence, but it’s true.

Unfortunately, she has been asked to leave the facility by the end of the month because she’s got so many write-ups, and she’s always in the middle of whatever is going on. It breaks my heart to know she won’t be there anymore after next week; I won’t see her, I won’t have to watch the cameras when she’s out and about, and my days at work may get a little calmer. I don’t know if I want that calm or if I’ve gotten used to the madness at work, but I’ll definitely miss her craziness.

On Friday, she was on a roll.

She was going off about anything and everything. She was going off on everyone. She was yelling. She was complaining. She was screaming about different things, and she promised she wasn’t screaming at me – but more so – screaming at everything going on – and venting TO me. She vented about lead staff. She vented about people who live there and are on her “shit list”. She vented about her write-ups, and all kinds of things, and I just let her. I knew she was angry. I knew she needed to let it all out.

She also told me she was going to “raise hell until she leaves”. I kind of made her smile when I so seriously told her, “Please don’t do that! Especially on the weekends when my son and I are here”. She promised me she wouldn’t raise hell on the weekends when we’re there, but Saturday – oh Lord! She raised hell and took it to the max while we were there – from the time we walked in, to the time we left – we were both busy chasing Daisy around and getting her to behave.

At one point, she was yelling at another tenant / resident, and I told her she promised she would be good on the weekends. She yelled, “I didn’t promise shit!”. I told her she really did. She said she doesn’t remember that.

Saturday, she was chasing people, looking for people to curse out that she doesn’t like, going off on people, and just doing some off the wall – wild stuff. My son dealt with her the first half of our shift and got her to go back to her room finally, and the 2nd half of the shift, I was already done with it. I grabbed my walkie and told my son, “I got this!”, and I headed upstairs to where she did NOT belong.

As soon as I got up there and she saw me, she yelled, “WHAT?”.

I looked at her, raised my head a bit and told her:

I told her she needed to go downstairs to her room before I pick her up and carry down the stairs. I tried joking with her, but that didn’t work.

She yelled back, “I’m going to push you down the stairs. What are you going to do about that?”.

I smiled and told her, “Please don’t!”. She kept screaming, so the entire 2nd floor could hear her, and yelling that she doesn’t “give a f****”. Eventually, she looked down at her feet and so calmly said, “Hey! My socks don’t match!”. I laughed and told her, “Neither do mine today!”. I told her I just grabbed two that were clean and threw them on because I hadn’t matched socks after laundry yet.

I told her if she came downstairs with me, I’d give her juice and snacks or whatever she wanted. She said she didn’t want any of that, but that she’d come downstairs with me. She asked if I wanted to race, and she blamed her mismatched socks for the reason she lost. 🤣

I thought all was okay, but then she started screaming on the first floor – about different things that pissed her off.

She kept telling me she wasn’t yelling at me, but she needed to let me know everything going on that lead staff doesn’t want to talk about or deal with. I told her I understood. I tried to sympathize with her, and she grabbed papers and a pen from the suggestion box – to write down whatever she wanted to say to lead staff. She told me she was going to “take this place down”. I made her laugh when she tried to start writing and the cap was still on. I told her, “Daisy, you have to take the pen cap off if you’re going to take this place down and write your little heart off!”.

Saturday, she drove us crazy and she was all over the place causing issues. So many incident reports were written on her, and she was furious with our director. So much, that she wanted us to call her in, so she could confront her. I told her I wasn’t doing that, and she could see the director when she came in this week.

Yesterday (Sunday):

She was better.

She stood in the hallway and talked to me for almost three hours.

We laughed so much, and she was fun yesterday. I was strict with her yesterday and told her that she at least has to behave until 3 PM – when I leave. She looked at the clock and so hilariously asked, “Just until 3?”. I told her, “Just until 3 at least!”. She said she guesses she can do that, and she did!

She actually behaved for me.

I had to laugh when she started getting a bit wild about 2:45, and I told her she better be good for the next shift. She told me, “Nuh – uh! You said until 3 PM, and I only have 15 minutes left!”. lmfao. She had me laughing so much yesterday. I’m not even joking when I tell you that at 3 PM on the dot – one of our other tenants / residents came down and told us that Daisy punched him in the head. He was laughing about it, and so were we – when he didn’t even want a report written up and just said, “I’m okay, but that little woman has a fierce punch!”. He didn’t say why she punched him, but he said she was mad about something.

Listen. At least she kept it bottled up until our shift ended like she promised.

Still – a part of me is sad that she has to leave. There’s one other that drives us insane, but he’s been asked to leave as well.

These things are never easy, and I know we get told not to get attached to our tenants / residents, but there’s a piece of us that starts to care for them on a personal level. There’s a part of us that starts to love them like family, and we do get attached. So, to think we may never see them again – it’s heartbreaking in a way.

At the same time – many of them have grown to love us, and a lot of them always tell my son and I – that we’re the best employees they’ve gotten in a long time. They know we care and we want the best for them.

It also broke my heart this weekend when I was telling one of the ladies who likes to sit and talk to us – that we may move this summer. She asked where and I told her we are trying to get closer to IL. but possibly Wisconsin. She looked so sad, and I told her we’d come back to visit often. She killed me when she told me, “That’s what everyone tells us, but once they leave – they never come back and visit us”. They’ve seen so many staff members come and go, but when they get close to staff – it breaks their hearts even more when staff leaves and lies to them about coming back to visit.

They already have trust issues from their pasts, so to have staff that leave – lie and say they’ll come visit and don’t – I don’t want to be a part of that. I really do want to come back and vacation here in Minnesota from time to time and visit them. I want them to trust me and see that I will come see them and check in here and there.

I also plan to give some of them my personal number, so they can call and check in, and I can see how they’re doing, and so some of them can call me and talk if they need someone to listen. I’ve seen them at their bests, and I’ve seen them at their worsts, and they always push through whatever they go through. ❤️

We also know that at this job, we have to stay professional and just numb ourselves to those who leave and can’t come back, or those we lose for other reasons. When I first started this job, I got super close to this one woman I’ll call “Shannon”. She and I used to always joke around, and I’d tell her boyfriend not to come downstairs without my homegirl. She passed away a few weeks after I met her.

And – just like nurses and doctors who lose patients – we staff at this job – have to numb our feelings and go on with our work.

So, I continue to love this job and do what I can for people. I continue to show up and love everyone there. I continue to listen. To try to help. To be there for our residents, and to try to make them laugh when I can.

I had one of our younger co-workers yesterday – tell my son and I that she HATES when we’re there because everyone is so “chatty”.

I took it personal because we’re a lot of fun. What do you mean you HATE when we’re there? She meant that, too!

My son told me he feels like it’s jealousy because not everyone comes and talks to her – like they talk to us.

Not everyone comes and gifts her things – like they gift us things they’ve made.

Not everyone calls or comes to the office to say goodbye to her – like they do to us when our shifts end.

He told me not to take it personal, but her little comments sometimes – are wild.

I try not to say anything back to her because I know she’s only 18. I’m not petty, and as someone way older than her – I try to keep my calm with her comments and laugh it off. I did say something like, “Why? We’re a lot of fun when we’re here! Many love us for it, and some hate us for it!”. When I said that “some hate us for it” comment, it was directed at her. Still, I tried to bite my tongue further and not take it too far.

She’s young and many of her comments in the past have been unnecessary, but still – I always try to remember I’m way older, and it’s not worth any comments I can make back. I don’t need to be petty, and I try to always remain funny, professional, and kind.

So, we go to work. Love everyone there. Be nice to those with negative comments – like her and just enjoy our days as much as we can.

*****

Funny shoe story:

I had to run to Walmart for a few things on Friday after I got the kids from school.

Upon walking to the back to get bunny food for Lani’s bunny – I passed the women’s shoe isle, and saw these:

Both of my kids – my little dude and my daughter – at the same time – both told me “NO!”.

My son called them ugly and my daughter told me she’s doing me a favor by taking them out of the cart and not letting me walk out of the store with them. It made me laugh, but I told her I wasn’t trying to impress anyone, I love them, and I’m taking them.

They continued to tell me NO.

I played a little game of Tug of War with my daughter, and she laughed when I told her to UNHAND my shoes!

Did I get them? I sure did!!!!!!

It’s Winter. I’m not trying to go buy anything fancy right now, and I really do love these shoes. 😁 They’re also comfortable.

My kids teased me that these are “old people shoes”, and my co-worker laughed when I told her the story, and she asked if she was old because she actually likes them as well. Yep. I told her we’re both old and we need to just admit it.

Loves.

I’d love to write more and I’m sure I have a ton of other things to write, but I can’t concentrate because my little dude has just decided to sit next to me and make tons of noise until I go watch a movie with him. So, I’m going to end it here, and hopefully – I’ll be back tonight to catch up on what all of you have going on.

I also truly do promise to answer emails that some of you have sent me. I swear I will tonight.

XOXO.

❤️Shel❤️