Confessions of a one-time “hater”. (Guilty), and some funny work stories.

April 28, 2026 Shel R.2 Comments

So, I have a confession to make, and I’m a little embarrassed by it.

However – we grew through tough times and make mistakes – that teach us valuable lessons in life, right?

One of our lead staff members was demoted a month ago, and she ended up finding a new job, so her position was available.

She cleaned out her office, and she was on her way to her new job.

That means – her position was open, and anyone could apply.

I’m not sure who else did, but I know I did. I interviewed for it a few weeks ago.

My co-worker (who has only been there for three weeks) interviewed for it, and so did another co-worker at the last minute. The other co-worker was too young, so they didn’t think she’d be a good fit.

Other than those other two, I don’t know if there was anyone else who tried to get it, but my boss kept telling me she hasn’t decided yet and would let us know soon.

I got a call last week from the boss and she was beating around the bush, making small talk, and so slow about just telling me, “Hey, you didn’t get it”. She eventually got there, and she told me that I was such a strong candidate, and that – if any other lead staff position opened up – she’d let me know first.

She felt bad, but I told her it was totally fine, thanked her for calling and handled it with grace. I wasn’t mat at her, and while I was a little disappointed because the pay is better, and I could make my own hours – as well as having my own office to decorate – (which I’ve always wanted), I decided maybe there was something better out there for me.

I felt like she found someone more experienced – who qualified more than I did, and I was okay with that.

However, I then found out it was the co-worker who has only been there for three weeks – that got the lead staff position. That was promoted for that spot. That got the office I was so ready to take and decorate. That was about to do the job I was looking forward to learning and getting into.

The fact that she hasn’t even been there for that long bothered me, and I’ve been working my ass off for this facility, coming in when others can’t sometimes, and proving myself to my boss. Everyone there loves me, and I love everyone there. I get along with everyone, and this woman who just got there three weeks ago – gets promoted and gets to join lead staff! Um, excuse me……but what?!

Not only was I confused when I found out she got it, but then I was hearing from different people that it’s favoritism and what some told me was called (Nepotism). The act of favoring friends and family in professional, political, or business settings – rather than merit or those who deserve what those family and friends get.

Rumor had it that this woman who got the position – is a family member of my boss’s ex-husband. Of course, that didn’t sit well with me, but it made sense as to why she would get the position.

Still, it bothered me.

I congratulated her when I saw her. I tried to be happy for her and tell her I think she’d do well. I tried not to let it bother me in front of her.

Yesterday, I came into work, and she wasn’t supposed to be there. I walked in and she says, “There you are!”. Supposedly, she thought she had to work until 9 AM because someone told her I didn’t get in until 9 AM on weekdays. I told her that’s only on Fridays. I usually come in at 7 AM, and she decided to say since she’s punched in already, she may as well go check out her new office while she has the chance.

I’m sure she was trying to rub it in my face, and she knew I was looking to get that position, so I just kind of gave her a:

kind of look – smiled, and told her, “Sounds good!”.

I giggled when one of our other lead staff members whispered to me, “She’s not even supposed to be here or clocked in right now! Now, she’s checking out her office?”.

I wondered if she came in while I was working – just to do exactly what I felt like she was doing.

Throwing it my face.

She said 3 more times as she did random things around the main office – how she was going to check out her office. Okay, so go! Why do you keep mentioning it?! I didn’t say that though, but I did find it wild how she had to keep announcing it – like she was expecting a celebration or something.

I found it really hard yesterday to be happy for her, and I felt bad about it – but then again – I didn’t. I wanted to know what skills – what degrees – what knowledge she had – over me and why she was chosen instead of myself.

When I found out from her – that she’s a two-time felon, has court dates still coming up, is on years of probation for her Criminal activities, and has no degrees – my mind was so boggled. I couldn’t wrap my mind around it. Seriously – why – did my boss pick her over me?

I’m the one with two degrees in Criminal justice and no criminal history.

So, I felt some kind of way while I was sitting in the main office and trying to let it go.

Not to mention that as she was decorating her office or doing whatever she was doing on the other side of the building where it is – she kept going back and forth – walking in and out of – and through the main office where I was. There was no reason for it because all lead staff usually goes around the main office to get to either side, so her walking through it – irritated me a bit as she kept doing it, and then – doing my job for me as I was sitting there as well.

She kept reaching over me, going around me, and dealing with things I was supposed to be dealing with.

Do you want to decorate and check out your new office that you’ve mentioned multiple times now, or do you want to do my job and be in the main office – because you can’t do both!

Let me be fair and say that I woke up emotional yesterday because it was rainy, gloomy and cold outside, and my first thought when I woke up – was my oldest child who passed. Pain comes in waves, right? Yesterday, the waves came with the rain and it just hit me out of nowhere, so I cried a bit in the morning, and didn’t even want to go to work, but I knew I needed the money, and I dragged my ass out of bed – to the shower, back to the room to get dressed, to my car, and into work anyway.

Feeling emotional about my oldest and then dealing with this co-worker at work who I then find out has a criminal background, and all this other stuff going on, but got the job instead of me – it was a lot that early in the morning.

I made myself a cup of coffee, tried to ignore whatever she was doing or saying, and I tried to go on with my day as normal, but as I was sitting there talking to one of the residents who I’m so cool with – we were talking about if I got the job or not.

He knew I applied. I told him no, and I told him I didn’t know why, but we discussed the situation, and just like I’m always there for the residents in the facility I work in – I tried to do the same thing yesterday, but he ended up being there for me instead – as tears fell from my eyes.

You know those times you really want to cry, and you try so hard to hold it in, but they just do their own thing sometimes and flow? That’s what happened! As much as I tried to hold them in, they fell and I grabbed a tissue and quickly wiped my eyes.

I’ll call this guy “Paco”. Paco and I sat there talking for almost an hour and he kept telling me how wrong it was that I didn’t get it, especially because all the residents know that while many of the lead staff and others come to work for the money, there are three main people who go above and beyond and show that they really give a damn about the residents. Me, My son, and the nurse there.

He then told me, “Listen. I know how you’re feeling, but I just want you to know how proud I am of you right now. You didn’t get the position. Someone who shouldn’t have got it – got it – and you’re still here. You’re still standing. You’re still trying to be positive and show us so much love, and do your thing while you’re here, and I guarantee you – God has a plan!”.

He was telling me that there’s a high turnover rate in that place, and the way the place treats their best employees – is why they can’t keep their best employees. I told him I was hurt, angry, and that I love the residents so much, that I want to stay, but – there’s just some things that go on there that I don’t agree with, and this might have just pushed me over the edge to find something better.

He agreed with me and told me how he feels about that place, and how every time he tries to say something about whatever goes on there – they threaten to kick him out. He then told me he wouldn’t blame me if I left, but that he’d miss me and he would hope I left for something so much better because I deserve it, and I deserved that position.

I think what really got to me yesterday – was feeling like my college degrees and me having a clean background – meant nothing at that moment, and I needed to know why. Like all the hard work I’ve done in school for four years to earn my degrees and then working my ass off in this facility for a long time now – meant nothing, and it killed me knowing she has felonies, and only 3 weeks at the job – and she got it.

I’m just being totally vulnerable and honest right now.

I was not okay yesterday morning – emotionally or mentally – over not only my oldest – but over this situation as well, and it didn’t sit right with me.

Residents weren’t happy I didn’t get it.

One of our other lead staff was bothered I didn’t get it.

I just felt betrayed.

So, I eventually asked my boss if I could talk to her, and we went into her office.

I asked why it was given to this co-worker and how I felt about it because of her background and her time at the job, and my boss looked at me and asked if I wanted an honest answer, or what. Of course!

Did I get any real answers? No.

Instead, she sugar-coated it and told me that the rumors about the woman being related to her ex-husband are not true and she never saw her a day in her life – until she came to the job to apply. The face on other staff members faces when I said she denied knowing the woman – was hilarious, but it told me everything I think I know.

She then went on to say that she doesn’t think it’s the right role for me, and she sees me doing something so much higher, better – and that because I have my degrees and no criminal background – she “envisions” something else for me.

She stated that things are always changing at the company, so she wants to consider me for something in a higher-up position. She told me that one of the women who runs the buildings in different areas (there’s multiple) applied for a few different positions and was turned down, before she was finally offered a seat on one of the highest levels there is, and now she’s doing amazing and runs things.
Not to get discouraged.

She went on and on and tried to make me feel better, but I wasn’t okay with her answers, because she still wasn’t telling me what qualifications this other woman had – that would make her more qualified than myself.

And – as a boss – I guess she felt like she didn’t have to.

Do I believe they don’t know each other? No.

Still, I couldn’t do anything about it, so I simply told my boss I wasn’t feeling it yesterday, I was going home, and I asked her to be okay with that, and she was. She totally supported my decision to not be at work yesterday, and she had this co-worker of mine who was supposed to be busy checking out her office but kept walking through the main office – sit in the main office when I left, and this co-worker of mine – was not happy about it.

I did leave. I did take the day off yesterday, and I got my mind right, and pulled myself together.

I thanked Paco – one of our best residents there – for letting me have my bad day, and for talking me through it.

I thank my son – because sometimes – we’re each other’s voice of reason, and yesterday – he was mine.

He knew what happened and he told me:

“Mom, maybe it’s a blessing in disguise you didn’t get it. It seems like anything the boss doesn’t want to deal with – it goes to that side, and maybe our boss didn’t want you to have to take on that load. Maybe she knows the position is stressful, exhausting, and comes with a hell of a lot of responsibilities, and she didn’t want to give that all to you!”.

He said:

“Maybe she does have something else better and bigger in mind for you. Maybe someone is leaving and we don’t know about it yet, and she plans to put you in that position. Maybe there’s a reason you didn’t get this position and there’s something else out there for you that is going to pop up.

The universe knows what it’s doing, and you have to trust it. Look how stressed out and irritated our last Resident advocate was, and how she was more than happy to find something else, so you don’t think ol’ girl is going to be stressed out? Plus, she has to pick up all the days that someone can’t come in, and eventually – she’s going to be stressed out about that – and get tired of it! Take it as a blessing!”.

My kid made me smile the way he was trying to make me feel better and be that voice of reason.

Knowing I wasn’t going to get any real answers from my boss, I just left and made sure she was okay with me taking the day off. My son was using my car, so he came to pick me up when I called him, and we went to Starbucks – because I deserved it. ha.

I still felt like a big baby yesterday after I left.

I still felt like I was a “hater” yesterday, and I hate haters, so to feel like I was one yesterday – bothers me now, but I think I had every right to feel the way I did. No matter what.

And then – when I came home and really thought about it, I felt like maybe our boss put her in that position to help her. She’s on probation and she has court dates, so maybe our boss felt like it would look good in court coming up – if she got this promotion and she’s doing something as a lead staff member. My boss did say she believes in 2nd changes, and helping other people, so maybe that was her reason for giving it to her.

I’d like to think my boss knows my two degrees and no criminal history – is going to get me further than that position I wanted, but she knows that this woman needed all the help she could get, and helped her do anything to show the courts she’s on the right track, and if that’s the case – then I’m okay with it.

Everyone keeps saying this job is already going to this woman’s head, and that’s the one thing I can’t deal with. If you’re in a position of power – stay humble, because it could all be taken away so fast. Never think you’re above anyone, and as long as she stays humble, I have nothing else to say.

Do I feel like it should have been me? Yes.

But – maybe God knew she needed it more than I did.

I will also say that she could easily be bothered that I have two criminal justice degrees, and plan to become a probation officer if God allows it. She was going to school to become a probation officer before the felonies, and now – she has to do something different with her life, so maybe God knew I didn’t need the position because I have a wider range of career options, and she’s limited.

I trust God, and I don’t know fully why I wasn’t given it, but I do know I acted out of character yesterday, I’m truly sorry for it, and now – I feel like getting her a cute decoration / gift for her new office. 😘I’m always uplifting other woman, so the fact that I was a hater yesterday, I do feel guilty about it, and the fact that I went to my boss – I am embarrassed, but I needed to know why and I needed to get my feelings off my chest.

It made me giggle when she said it shows maturity that I’m able to come and sit down – talk with her and be respectful at the same time.

I mean – what was I going to do?

Go in there, yell, threaten her, throw things?! lol.

You know what that reminds me of? 🤣 If you’ve never seen the hilarious movie “GIRLS TRIP” – with Tiffany Haddish, Regina Hall, Queen Latifah, and Jada Pinkett Smith – you must!

Tiffany Haddish goes into her boss’s office to talk about her snack someone keeps taking out of the break room fridge and her behavior about it, and her boss tries to let her go, but she won’t accept that.

I wasn’t going to go into my boss’s office and misbehave or get crazy, and she wasn’t letting me go.

In fact, she told me they love me there and she hopes I still want to stay.

And –

Thank you, Starbucks – for being there for me in my time of needing you yesterday. 🤣I’m addicted to those damn Dubai Chocolate bites they have.

Listen.

I love my boss. I have nothing bad to say about her – even now.

She’s easier to talk to. She’s there when I need to talk. She’s understanding.

Not many bosses would let me say, “I’m not feeling this today. I’m leaving” and be totally fine with it, but she also understood why.

So, she made her decision, and it is what it is.

I don’t know if this co-worker of mine will be able to handle this job humbly, or with grace – or at all – because she already seems stressed out, but – I’m over being a hater, and I wish her the best, and hope that she enjoys her office and her new position.

I am rooting for her changing her life and doing bigger and better things because I believe in 2nd chances as well, and I do hope she’s amazing at her new position.

Maybe there is something bigger and better out there for me, and maybe my boss did think I was too good for this position and deserve more, but I’m just going to suck it up, continue to do my best, and come through for my residents – the way they expect me to. 💕

As for all of you out there – if you wanted that promotion or job you didn’t get – if you didn’t get into the college you wanted to get into, if you didn’t get picked for a sports team, If you didn’t get to take that trip you wanted to take – or whatever disappoint life throws at you – take it a blessing and know that God has something better in mind, and I trust that.

**********************

Besides that little bit of setback at work – let me share some funnies with you because a lot of you like my work stories! 😁

I have another co-worker who can both work my nerves and make me giggle sometimes.

She works in a different area of the building, so when she sneaks her way into the main office and sits down to chat with me for the longest – while I’m trying to do 10 other things – I joke with her and demand her back to her own area. She laughs about it, totally ignores me and continues to work my nerves – playfully.

I was leaning back in my chair relaxing with nothing to do one day last week, and she snuck in and shook the back of the chair, yelling – “Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!”. It’s a scene from FINDING NEMO in case you don’t know, and I yelled out, “FISHY! WHY ARE YOU SLEEPING?”.

We both laughed so much.

It may not have been exactly like we said it, but we both knew the references we were talking about, and we both got each other’s references right away.

Another day last week – she, one of the lead staff that I’ll call “Delilah”, and I – were in the main office talking. We had a day where there were cops in and out for different situations going on, so with one of the situations – this one tall, beautiful man (a cop) – had to come into the building, and then as he stood in the hallway, us gals drooled over him. 🤣

Delilah said she wants to ask him what she can do to get arrested, so he has a reason to touch her.

And – she’s lead staff! (I love our crew).

I had to laugh so much and joked with her to leave MY man alone. I asked if she wanted to fight for him. She says, “Hell yeah! Let’s go outside!”. I was leaving anyway because my shift was over, so she and I walked outside together, right past the cop as he dealt with the situation, and when he was done – she and I were standing by the curb talking – minding our business and he left.

The next day – my co-worker who works in the different area and likes to sneak into the office to annoy me – comes into the office and tells me, “I want that hot cop to come back. I saw you try to rub against him as he was leaving!”. I laughed and told her, “Um – I was just standing there! He brushed up against me!”.

It’s very true.

That cop was leaving that day, and I don’t know if he did it on accident or purpose, but I felt the side of him lightly brush up against my back as I stood there talking to my co-worker – Delilah. 😁

Point is – I adore many of my co-workers and I absolutely love this job – besides yesterday’s minor issue.

I love the residents as well, as I’ve mentioned.

So, we have a guy I’ll call “OG”.

OG loves coming to see me when I’m working and he always makes me laugh.

We joke around often. He’s an older guy in his late 50’s / early 60’s I believe, and over the weekend – he came down to the main office and asked me to look up the last name of his visitor. I joked that he’s letting people in without knowing their last names, and he smiled this big cheesy smile.

He said he met her at the Casino the night before and brought her back there.

One side of our building can have visitors outside only, and the other side – can bring visitors inside and up to their mini-apartments and he did that. I looked up the visitor log and told him the last name, and he says, “Thanks! I don’t want to get any one confused!”. PLAYER! 🙄🤣 He’s hilarious though!

For my residents – for this job I love – for the co-workers I admire and get along with so well – for the help I give, and they know I’ll go above and beyond for any of them – I’m going to continue to smile, to show up, to be there do the best damn job I can – promotions or not.

So, I confess that I was a one-day hater, I’m over it, I feel guilty about it, and we all go through it when life hands us disappointments, but again – maybe she feels the same way about me having two degrees and being able to do the job she also wanted to do in the future (probation), if I do get there.

I think sometimes – we all have a bit of envy in us, and it’s our job to let it control us or control it, and I decided to control it, be happy for her, and just be there if she needs anything – because she does deserve a 2nd chance and this will look good for her in court and being on probation – so I wish her well.

That being said – I’m out of here. 💕

XOXO.

🤗Shel🤗

I’m here.

April 22, 2026April 22, 2026 Shel R.5 Comments

It has been a while.

I know! I know!

I’ve been so busy working, picking up extra hours, saving money, trying to get everything aligned to maybe buy a house next year.

I’ve been trying to get my car paid off – as I don’t have much left to go, and getting it fixed because I’m still dealing with the headaches of either nobody knowing what’s wrong with it, or nobody wanting to touch it because it’s foreign and “complicated”. I’m also looking to trade this car in within the next year or less and get something bigger and better.

On top of dealing with working so much, saving money, and still – the car issues – I’ve been dealing with weeks of frustrations about the moving situation.

Months ago, I told my previous landlord we may move at the end of May when my daughter graduates.

We wanted to go back home to IL. or close to it. To friends. To family. To familiar places we love so much.

That didn’t work out, and I decided it was probably best to stay here for one more year – no matter how much we were looking forward to moving back or moving closer to IL. and everyone / everything we love.

I was a little surprised when my landlord messaged me and asked if I would be out by May 1st. I told him no, and that he was informed if we move – a big *IF* – We’d be out by May 31st. He replied and said he’d tell the new tenants they could move in – June 1st.

Um – what?!!!!

I never said we’d be moving for sure, and I let him know that I’d tell him for sure around the end of April, but he took it upon himself to get a deposit, first month rent and a new lease signed from whoever he claimed was moving in.

I know he hated empty apartments because he was losing money, and he always tried to rent out apartments fast. It didn’t matter to whom – he did no credit checks or background checks, and we’ve had our fair share of crazy, wild, people who were up to no good – living in the building – because he didn’t care who he rented to – as long as he had income coming in from each apartment.

So, I wasn’t surprised when he rented my apartment out that fast, and who knows if he was telling the truth or not, but he was ready to have someone move in – from what I heard. I told him that’s not how it works, and he told me, “That is how it works. I’m not renewing your lease. You said a few times you were moving or wanted to!”. I told him no, I said I MIGHT move, and yes, I want to – but we weren’t for sure.

I also let him know my lease goes until 2027 – if I decided to stay.

He said he already has new tenants moving in, and I knew he didn’t want to give them their money back if that was the case.

He ended up selling the building to these new landlords we have now. (A sweet young couple). I felt so bad for them because this is their first ever residential property they’ve owned, and they had to walk into this mess that the previous landlord left behind. So many things need to be repaired, and the husband and I have talked – and he has said if he knew everything he was walking into, they may have thought twice about buying the building.

On top of the building being neglected for so long by our previous landlord, and the new landlords having to fix it all up, now they were dealing with this issue of me not moving until next year, my lease going until 2027, and them feeling like their hands were tied because they felt like they had to honor the leases and the landlords new tenants that he supposedly had moving into my unit.

I let them know that if they had to honor the leases, again – mine goes until 2027.

They were unsure what to do, so I did what I had to do and contacted a lawyer – just to get a legal take on the matter.

The lawyer asked for my lease. I sent it to her. She looked it over.

It was plain and simple.

After putting facts together, she said the new landlords had three options.

………Let me stay another year because my lease doesn’t expire until May 2027.

………Try to take me to court at the end of May of this year and the judge will say the same thing the lawyer is saying and dismiss the case because I have every right to stay if I want to – with the lawyer also letting me know that this won’t cost me any money. It will cost the new landlords money to try to take me to court for something that will be thrown out, and all it will cost me – is time off work to show up.

………The lawyer said the new landlords could honor the lease the previous landlord just signed with the new tenants if there really are new ones, and write me a check for $5,000 for my moving costs, as well as giving me my deposit back the same day as the apartment walk-through – as long as it’s clean and in good condition.

These options were told to the new landlords, and I know they have no fault in this matter for the headaches the previous landlord was causing, but they were in it now and had to deal with it, since they are the new owners of the building.

The husband and I had a great conversation after weeks of back-and-forth on this topic, and me having a lawyer to stand with me on this, and the husband apologized. I told him he had nothing to apologize for because the previous landlord caused all of this and not him or his wife. He said whatever he does – he believes in God, walks by faith, makes all his decisions in faith, and absolutely doesn’t want to go to court over this issue.

He agreed my lease goes until 2027, I have no lease violations, my rent is up to date, and there’s no reason to try to make me move earlier, so – he said he was allowing me to stay – which is legally my right anyway. After weeks of that nonsense and trying to figure that out – it all worked out and I’m grateful. 💕

The previous landlord?

There’s so much I could sit here and write when it comes to him and all the drama, craziness, nonsense and weirdness he has caused – not only with me – but other tenants who seem to be sharing their stories with the new landlords as well. I’m not the only one who has had issues for years with the previous landlord – and it makes me feel better because others are grateful that we have new owners as well.

Our previous landlord – he was something else, but I’m not here to bash the guy, and I won’t sit and write all the crazy, wild, off-the-wall stories I have of harassment, drama, and his lack of professionalism. I don’t think he was a bad guy, but he had a lot of his own issues.

I’m not here to mess up his reputation, and I hope that man gets his act together and treats people better.

That’s all I can say.

At the end of the day, even if my car issues aren’t figured out and I have a million other things on my plate – and on my mind – at least the moving situation is figured out, and we’ll be staying here for one more year.

Do I want to deal with another Minnesota Winter that goes from October sometimes – all the way through April? Hell no.

I am happy that we don’t have to hire movers right now or rent a moving truck – continue to pack up and have this deadline hanging over our heads now. 🤗

I feel like because the previous landlord knew that some tenants spoke up against him and the way he was – he caused issues for those of us who didn’t stay quiet, and I look back now on this whole moving situation where he tried to force me out, and I feel like it’s true when the Bible says:

Again, in all fairness, I did tell him I planned to move, so maybe he was just trying to fill the place fast in case the building didn’t sell, and he’d have money coming in from this apartment again right away.

I never knew what his intentions were because they were always changing, but – that chapter of my life is over, and we don’t have to deal with him anymore.

I hope God blesses that man and his family and takes care of them – because I do also know and I can also say – that it wasn’t always bad with him. Yes, there was more bad than good – but there were times we had decent conversations, and I remember one time telling him, “You are too young to be this stressed out! Go have a drink and relax!”.

I remember one time when he called me randomly and told me, “I’m not an asshole like you think I am!”. I laughed a bit because I have no idea where that came from and wondered if he was just at home and thinking about me speaking out against all the repairs he didn’t make, or the way he treats his tenants or what!

That call made me giggle as well.

Anyway, pray for me because I’m here another year, but God is good and I also know it’s a blessing and gives me more time to save for a down payment on a house.

I never wanted to own a house as I’ve said before because of all the headaches that go into it, but I think it’s time. I want my own washer and dryer without having to worry about who is doing laundry when I need to. I want my own driveway, so I don’t have to worry about anyone being parked in my spot when I come home.

I want my own backyard, so my kids can go outside without worrying if someone is going to fly in or out of the parking lot.

My life is far from perfect, and I handle every curve ball it throws at me with faith and grace.

I always say that even if God doesn’t answer my prayers the way I want him to, he answers in ways that he knows he needs to – and that fit his plans for me and my little family. So, if it’s meant to be next year – it will be. If not, it is what it is!

Besides the moving issue and the car still not working properly – let’s talk prom!

My daughter is all signed up to go.

She needed $40 for her prom ticket, and I gave her that.

She told me students have to be there at 5 PM, and parents are allowed to go in for the Grand March and photos at 6. I’m totally going to be there and I can’t wait! 💕

I thought she was going to wear her red dress again that I got her a few months ago for Winter formal.

That dress was $260.

This teenager of mine tells me a few days ago, “I can’t wear that dress again! They’ve already seen me in it. I need a long gown type of dress. It’s prom”. Her dream dress is a black sparkling dress.

We went yesterday to a place that has decently priced prom dresses, but they didn’t have her size.

It took her forever to try on 5 dresses, and as I stood there looking around right by the dressing room area, I smiled a bit when a woman in her 40’s or early 50’s came out and asked if I would zip up a dress in the back for her.

I told her it’s beautiful on her – after I zipped it up. She thanked me and kept on trying on dresses and coming out to show her daughter – who came by the dressing room area, and this woman was looking in the 4 mirrors the shop had.

She was upset because she ripped one of the dresses as she was trying it on, and she was upset because no matter what her daughter (or myself) told her, she announced that she hates this because she’s too old to be trying on things and expecting them to fit.

My heart broke for her because she didn’t even realize how perfect she was in my eyes, and I saw absolutely nothing wrong with her. 🥺 She was fit. She had tanned glowing skin. Her hair was amazing. She had a great figure, and she looked beautiful in those dresses she was trying on. Her teenage daughter giggled about how picky she was being, and I almost wanted to knock her daughter upside the head when her daughter went to the mirror and started complaining about “flaws” on her own face.

“Ew. Why is this disgusting? Why is this like that?”. Her words to herself as she looked at her reflection.

I wanted to tell the mother and daughter how perfect they are, and how I’d love to look like either of them or wish I could trade bodies / body parts with them because sometimes – I dislike my own, so I get it. To me – they were perfect. To themselves – they saw all the flaws they hated.

It made me realize that each of us has something about ourselves we dislike or hate, and we never know who looks at us in this world and thinks we’re perfect, when we can’t see it ourselves. Who looks at us and says, “She’s beautiful”, when we see something totally different in the mirror? Who looks at us and says, “I wish I had her curves, her hair, her eyes” – when we look in the mirror and see all the things we would love to change about ourselves.

It’s sad honestly.

There is always someone out there who looks at you and thinks you’re amazing, so we shouldn’t be so hard on ourselves and pick apart our flaws, but that’s what all of us do, isn’t it?!

So, when my daughter said she was fat and she’ll never find a dress to fit her – I was aggravated and told her about that mother and daughter complaining about themselves inside of the store – when I saw perfection. How we can be our own toughest critics sometime, and there’s people out there that look at others, want to be them, be like them or look like them – while we can’t see it in ourselves because we’re too busy being our own biggest haters.

I told my daughter how perfect she is. How she’s not fat – she’s Latina and curvy.

How beautiful she is and how many girls wish they looked like her.

How I would love to have her figure and I’d rock it if I was her.

How I wish I looked half as good as she does.

And then – I found myself being my own critic and biggest hater again. Picking apart my own flaws again.

It’s sometimes a sad pattern that many of us deal with and if you say you don’t – you’re lying!

We all have something about ourselves we don’t like, and that’s okay – but don’t let it bring you down!

Embrace whatever you don’t like about you, screw the world if they don’t like what they see, and never forget to compliment others when you can – because it may just make them feel so much better about themselves and the things they dislike.

You never know!

Be the reason someone sees themselves differently today! 💕

I always try to give compliments whenever I can, because it may change someone’s whole way of thinking about themselves.

My daughter and I had the talk about self-confidence and seeing herself in a different way, and how I won’t give up finding her the perfect prom dress before next week – even if I have to pay another $260. I didn’t want to, but if it makes her feel beautiful and she finds the dress she loves, I’m going to go above and beyond.

Thankfully, I was worried about also buying her a graduation dress, but she asked if it’s okay if she wears her favorite flowered summer dress for graduation, and it’s adorable. I absolutely agreed to that, and I’m grateful I don’t have to spend even more money on another dress in a few weeks.

So, the prom dress hunt continues, and I ask for all of your prayers as I go crazy over this one. lol.

She also dropped it upon me today that her friend’s mom wants to come over and hang out with me as our daughters get ready here at my house – like they did for Winter formal. She wants to take photos and have fun with us, and I won’t stop her from doing that. I think she has every right to be here watching her daughter get ready and seeing all the fun the girls have here at my house as they do so.

It’s supposed to be my daughter, and three of her other friends, and I’m looking forward to all the beautiful photos, and excitement that night as they do get ready here.

If you want to giggle – they were all going to go as the “Men in Black” characters.

They were all going to show up in Black dresses with black sunglasses on. 🤣

However, one of the girls found a gold dress, and they all decided not to do the MEN IN BLACK idea.

This journey has been amazing – watching my daughter start 7th grade here at this school when we moved to Minnesota, all the way until now – her Senior year. Seeing all the friends she has made. All the memories she has made. All the extra “adopted children” I now have and call my own because everybody knows at that school – that I’m EVERYBODY’S MAMA! 😁 All the crazy nights of homework and late studying. All the tests. All the high school drama she comes home and tells me about.

I’ll remember it all.

All the “lasts” that are now here – as this chapter of her life comes to an end soon.

I thought her Winter formal was her last dance, and I totally forgot about prom, but this is it.

The very last dance, and then – in a few weeks – cap and gown!

To the Class of 2026 – may all your dreams come true, may life be gentle on you, and may you get to do everything and anything you want to do.

Make life fun. Make lots of memories and be kind to everyone you meet.

As for me – in my own life – I’m just taking it one day at a time, trying to get my daughter graduated and onto the next chapter of her life (EMS classes) / college and preparing for our mini-road trip to IL. in a few weeks.

Love you!

💕Shel💕

Milestones, blessings, and a Rainbow Brite themed 44th.

April 9, 2026 Shel R.2 Comments

I came home this morning from dropping the kids off at school – to some big pick-up truck parked in MY spot.

With MY apartment number on it.

Do I know who it is? No.

Do I care who it is? No!

WHY ARE YOU PARKING IN A SPOT FOR A CERTAIN APARTMENT NUMBER – WHEN THERE’S VISITOR PARKING AVAILABLE?!!!!!

This is a small thing. This is truly petty and I’m just jokingly whining about it, but it annoys me because it’s not the first time it’s been done.

I’ve come home a few times and someone is parked in my spot. I don’t recognize the pick-up – to be able to go knock on anyone’s door and ask them to move, and I’m not going to all eight apartments here – to try to figure it out. Still, I almost feel like it should be common knowledge not to park where there’s clear numbers for someone else’s spot. There’s also another big pick-up in one of the visitor’s spots that I don’t know, so I’m going to guess they’re here together – whoever they are.

Thank you to the big red pick-up who followed common knowledge, but this blue one in my spot – who the hell are you?!!!!

Of course, I’m being funny and using humor. I’m annoyed, but at least there was one spot in visitor’s parking open – where I parked, and it’s right in front of my patio door, so it’s not a huge deal, but if I was coming home from a long day at work and just wanted to park in my spot, come in and relax – I wouldn’t be able to.

Part of me wants no part of the headaches that come along with owning a house, but things like this – make me want to start looking for one because I’d like to come home and know that it’s my driveway, nobody is in it – (except maybe my kid’s cars when they get their own), and knowing there will always be parking.

Besides this minor inconvenience just now when I got home, let’s chat.

The weather here is insane!

If you’ve seen the movie “Forrest Gump”, you’ll know the part where he says:

That’s how I feel about this Minnesota weather. “You never know what you’re gonna get!”.

We had a huge snowstorm this past weekend, and Saturday – my son and I couldn’t even get to work.

The roads weren’t plows. Visibility was zero. It was still snowing pretty hard, and since we left the house at 6 AM, it was still a bit dark.

We tried twice to turn the corner and get down the country road by our place, and it was a task.

I like my money. I don’t play about my money, so not being able to try to get to work – wasn’t happening. I was determined, but – nature was even more determined not to allow it.

The 2nd time we turned around to come home, we pulled into the parking lot and saw a crow fly over my car. My son is a bit Superstitious – so when he saw this crow, he made me laugh when he said, “No! Hell no! We’re not going! I’ve never seen a crow just flying around in this weather. That’s something telling us not to go that way. Not to even try to get to work. That’s an omen. That’s a warning!”.

I laughed it off and told him he’s crazy, and that I was going to try a 3rd time when it gets lighter outside in about 30 minutes. We sat in the car waiting, but 10 minutes after we saw the crow – our sirens started going off.

I think I mentioned it before, but our sirens go off for three reasons out here in the middle of nowhere.

–To alert people of bad weather / tornado warnings / watches

–To alert workers / students in the area and let them know that it’s noon (lunch time)

–To call for volunteer emergency personnel to assist regular emergency personnel

I turned on the scanner, and listened to see what was going on, and it was a crash on the route we would have been on if we went to work. Pretty soon, we heard there was another crash, and from what it sounded like – the road we take on the way to work – was closed in both directions.

My son told me, “See? See? We could have been involved in that – if we tried a 3rd time. I knew there was a reason that crow flew over your car. Those warnings are real. Nothing just happens for no reason!”.

Needless to say, I didn’t attempt a 3rd time. We have some great co-workers who went in for us, and we were able to stay home that day. We did carefully drive to the Dollar General around the corner, and get some food, snacks and drinks to stock up on – as we stayed indoors for the day.

I will be going in tomorrow for another co-worker – to make up for that Saturday, so thankfully, I didn’t lose money.

Once everything was cleared from that storm, I was irritated that I looked outside yesterday – and it was snowing again, but – it melted quickly as the day went on and the weather became beautiful. It then started raining yesterday afternoon and quickly got really windy as the rain became snow and rain mixed, and then – just snow again.

I have one friend who always jokes with me and tells me, “You know where it’s not snowing? HERE!”. She moved from IL. down to Arkansas and she’s always trying to get me to move down there. She’ll send me a message, and I’ll hear the birds in the background chirping, and we don’t have that here yet.

I miss that sound!

I have another friend out in IL. who took a video yesterday, and the grass is so green already. Their birds are chirping. The weather is so nice and the sun was out. I’m a little jealous.

I think I need to get the hell out of this state as soon as possible!

……………

In other news, we have a few weeks to go before my daughter graduates.

She is on the “A” honor roll once again for the 3rd time this year. I am so proud of her, and she has worked her ass off to get every credit – every good grade – ever piece of work in, and she deserves the world right now.

She is talking about going to prom – which will be her very last high school dance, and it makes my heart happy and sad at the same time.

I’ve heard that prom ends at 11:30 PM, and then – the school does the afterparty until 2-3 AM, which keeps students out of trouble, allows them to have fun, play games, hang out with friends, win prizes, etc. so, she’s been talking about going to that as well.

This is it!

The “lasts” are here.

She’s growing up.

Not only is this a huge milestone for her – to be graduating – but she’ll also hit another huge milestone when she turns 18 in August. She doesn’t want a graduation party. She’s made that clear, but I do plan to have some of her friends over, or to maybe do a hotel pool / pizza party with some of her friends and still have her enjoy something to celebrate her graduation. 💕 Even if it’s nothing huge.

She made me laugh a few days ago, when she asked what I was going to do when she goes off to college.

I smiled as I was driving and told her, “Go with you! What else would I do? We can share a dorm room!”. She told me, “UH – NO! You have to let me be on my own at some point! I can’t party with my mom there!”.

Me: Uh, you’re NOT going to party! You’ll be too busy studying!

We had a good laugh about it, but I know if she goes to college, it’s going to be such a big change for her, and a little scary at first, but I think she’ll be fine.

She has talked about doing EMT for a while and then going into being a full Paramedic – while also taking classes for her Criminal justice degrees to get into crime scene clean-ups or working in something that has to do with crime scenes.

That is major, and I am so happy and proud she’s on the right path and knows exactly what she wants to do. 🤗

……………..

In other news, does anyone else’s kids have 10,000 socks, but none of them match?! lmfao.

I swear – it never fails. I buy my kids new socks all the time, and by week 3 – the matches are missing.

Once-in-a-while – I’ll get bored and sit down to have a “sock party” as I call it, and I invite all the mismatched socks. 🤣 (Humor of course!). I get all the clean socks together, throw them on the bed or floor, and start matching them up one by one.

My daughter has been telling me she needs new socks for a long time now – because she doesn’t have any or none of hers match. I was in her room a month ago – cleaned it up for her and found at least – 50 pairs of socks that were clean and just needed to be matched. I then told her she better NOT tell me she doesn’t have any socks – or socks that match – again, and I showed her all the ones I found – as she laughed.

My little dude – he has a drawer full of clean socks – and sometimes in the morning – he’ll just throw on whatever socks we can find that fit him – because nowhere on my grave when I die – is it going to say, “She sent her kid out in mismatched socks!”. 🤣 I was bored the day before yesterday, so I ended up dumping out the entire drawer onto his bed, and started matching up clean socks, throwing away baby socks he still had in there that won’t fit anymore, and putting socks that had no matches – in a totally different drawer to do the rest of the laundry and see if they have matches later.

It’s quite the fun time. (NOT!) ha. I know it needs to be done every now and then though.

My little dude – speaking of him – he will be in the double digits this year – as he is turning 10.

Listen.

I sit and think sometimes and while I don’t have it all, and my life could be a thousand times better – or I wish it was – I’m blessed. I have a few milestones coming up to celebrate, I have good kids with good hearts, and they’re kind. I have a job I love. I have some great friends. I have a few great family members. I have my health. I’m still here and this year – I’ll celebrate my milestone of turning 44.

I think I’ve mentioned this before, but this year – I want to have fun. Like – really – have fun.

Most of my birthdays are just going to see a movie, going out to eat with the kids, coming home, taking photos, and enjoying a few glasses of wine.

I have no idea how I want to celebrate this year, but I will say that I want it to be exciting and special.

Fun.

Silly.

A few months ago, I was looking up old toys from the 90’s, and I saw a photo of Rainbow Brite.

I used to LOVE Rainbow Brite, and one of my friends joked that I should totally dress up like her and do a photo shoot. She was joking, but I thought to myself, “WHY THE HELL NOT?”. She asked if I was serious, and I said yes. I just might buy the costume from Amazon and do that. She told me I better send her every cute photo I take, and she told me, “Now you have to get a Rainbow Brite cake made and take a photo of you dressed like her – with the cake!”.

You don’t have to tell me twice! 😁

So, my theme this year for my birthday – is RB – and I still have no idea what I’m doing for my birthday, but I’m doing that photo shoot, getting my RB cake, and making it the best damn birthday I’ve had in such a long time. 💕

My kids laughed and asked if I was serious. Yes. Yes, I am!

I always see these videos on TikTok that say, “If you see your mom living her best life and having fun in her 40’s – let her! She spent her 20’s and 30’s raising you!”. Amen to that!

Anyway, I’m about to run out and run some errands, so all of you have a beautiful day and I will respond to comments, emails, etc. and catch up with your writings tonight.

🤗Shel🤗

Lineman Mike, Senior stuff, and the age of attraction.

April 3, 2026April 3, 2026 Shel R.Leave a comment

So, if you have TikTok – have you gone down the rabbit hole of the whole LINEMAN MIKE situation?

Oh Lord!

I was just scrolling on TT a few days ago, and I saw that everyone was pissed off at Lineman Mike. Not only his wife who jumped into the comments right away, but also – Mike’s grandma.

Yep. The grandma was there. She hopped right on TikTok and said how disappointed she was in his behavior.

I had no clue who he was or what was going on, so I went down that rabbit hole.

The comments were hilarious – with people saying things like, “Oh no! He disgraced his family as well!”, and “Uh oh! He done angered MEE-MAW!”. There were so many comments on so many different videos that people were making about the whole situation.

If you have no clue what I’m talking about, Mike is a lineman who went to something called a “Lineman’s Rodeo”, and then – the bar in Alabama. (Not his home state, I’m guessing?).

A Lineman’s rodeo – is a competitive event – where electrical line workers show off their professional skills. Pole climbing. equipment repair, and rescuing people in a fast-paced environment – (from what I’ve read). Some go to party after.

Mike and all his male co-workers / friends were with him a few nights ago, and all of a sudden – there’s a viral video going around TikTok of some girl – (I won’t say her name) – recording Lineman Mike dancing with her friend. Hugging her friend. Kissing her friend. Whispering in her friend’s ear. Getting close to her friend and cuddling up to her with a big smile on his face – like he doesn’t have a care in the world.

The video says, “My friend found her soulmate last night in Huntsville, Alabama after the lineman Rodeo and we know nothing about him except his name is Mike and his friends kept calling him like the birds in Finding Nemo (MIKE! MIKE! MIKE!). Help us get Nemo home!”

First of all, that’s a whole run-on sentence she wrote, and 2nd – the gulls in the movie “Finding Nemo” say, “MINE!” – but maybe Mike’s friends are just as goofy as he is. I don’t know.

Still…………..

The girl wanted to find Mike for her friend who danced with him most of the night. Who made him smile most of the night.

TikTok always does its thing and when someone asks for help finding someone else – the videos are usually shared around the world, and go viral, and that’s what happened. That’s how Mike’s WIFE ended up finding out I believe. She slid into the comments saying she knows him very well, it’s her husband, and he’s currently “explaining this to our two children”, as she wrote in the comment section of the original video.

Yep. Mike is married!

From what I understand, he wasn’t wearing a wedding ring, but he does have a weird looking “L” on his ring finger that I hear the wife drew there on their first date if I’m correct, and he had tattooed.

Now, I’m not sure if the wife saw the original video or a friend of hers recognized Mike, but – that’s what’s going on right now.

His wife found out, and rumor has it she is leaving him, trying to heal, and just spending time with her kids as much as possible during this tough time for her.

I was scrolling videos about this situation that everyone is talking about now, and many women are pissed at him. Some videos are calling him names and telling his wife she deserves better. Some videos are dissing the girl he was with and talking about her looks – and wondering why Mike would cheat on his beautiful wife with this other woman.

I’ve seen serious videos.

I’ve seen funny videos where the wives of other Linemen side-eye them with mean / warning looks, and these Linemen keep their head straights saying, “Mike done got us all in trouble!”. 🤣 I laughed a little too much when I saw a video that says, “Mike! Just say it wasn’t you” – and had Shaggy’s song (It wasn’t me) playing in the background. I’ve seen many different women and men speaking about this on TikTok, and some are hilarious. Some are not.

I’ve seen Mike’s wife. I’ve seen this other woman. I too wonder why Mike stepped outside of his marriage, but……………

There’s another video that was made – supposedly from a good friend of Mike’s.

This one video says, “Laura ain’t made Mike smile like that in 14 f***ing years…life’s short Mike. File and RUN back to Alabama”.

Pretty much suggesting that Mike files for divorce and runs back to Alabama to go get that girl from the bar that made him smile as much as he did that night.

You know I don’t condone cheating, and I’m saying it again – if you know that you’re not happy with your spouse / girlfriend / boyfriend / whoever – and there’s someone else that makes you smile when you meet them, see them, hang out with them, etc. why are you still with the person you’re with? Why aren’t you with the person you can’t stop thinking about? Why aren’t you with the person you really want? Why aren’t you with the person that makes your eyes light up – your heart skip a beat – and the one you’re nervous around – anytime you see them?

If you’re going to go out and cheat because you’re not happy, or that person doesn’t make you smile – what are you still doing with them?

I don’t want to hear excuses.

We have kids together. We have a lot of assets together. We have a house together. We have a joint bank account together. We have a business together. We have a car or cars together. We’ve been together so many years. We were childhood / high school sweethearts.

NONE OF THAT MATTERS IF YOU’RE NOT HAPPY!

I agree with the guy who made the video saying life is too short – and if you’re not happy with the person you’re married to or with – while I hate seeing divorces – I will say that you should be with who makes you happy – rather than cheating and getting caught. Rather than now – having your soon-to-be-ex – take everything you own or get most of everything.

Kids, assets, the house, cars, money, business’s – there’s always a way to share.

With the things you can sell – sell them and split the money. End the marriage or relationship with dignity and pride – rather than getting caught and being known as a cheat, and a disgrace to the family and your kids / wife / husband / whoever.

It’s okay to end a relationship / marriage and do what makes you happy or be with who you can’t stop thinking about – but it’s not okay to break someone’s heart disrespectfully, and especially – when it’s out there going viral.

There are so many cameras, phones and photos these days. We don’t live back in the 80’s and 90’s where there was no real way of collecting evidence. Evidence is all over these days, and technology has taken over, so never think you’re not going to get caught.

I know some relationships or marriages aren’t that easy to leave, but I feel like if you know you’re not happy and things are not getting better and you’ve really tried – file and move on! End it and move on! BE HAPPY – the right way!

So, this whole Mike situation – while it’s super messy and the world of TikTok is talking about it still – I’m praying for his wife and kids – as their entire world was turned upside down, and Mike is now an internet sensation and not in a good way.

Oh, Nemo. You should have went to your main home that night – instead of chasing Dory. 😶

Dammit, Mike!

Anyway –

My daughter recently had Senior Ditch Day.

She wanted a few of her friends to come over, but I wasn’t comfortable with that while I wasn’t home.

I had to work that day. So, she decided they were going to hang out a coffee shop in the area and go to her other friend’s sisters house later in the afternoon. I know her friend and her friend’s sister, so I was okay with that. It’s right down the block.

I told her to keep in touch with me all day that day, because I didn’t want her roaming the little town without knowing where she was, and she was actually great about letting me know when she changed locations. 💕 She had a good time. She was a good girl, and I laughed when I asked one of the tutors if there was a lot of Seniors in school that day.

She replied with, “Two”. 😁

The entire Senior class ditched.

I’m interested in knowing if they’re going to do a Senior prank this year.

Yesterday, we had this huge snowstorm, and it was pretty nasty outside. The roads were awful, and my daughter wanted me to sign a permission slip for her to go to an area an hour or so away on a school bus with some other Seniors and some Juniors.

I didn’t feel comfortable.

I know there’s been a lot of school bus accidents lately, and the roads being bad – didn’t help, but some of her really good friends were going, and it was for a career event. I didn’t want to stop her from going, so I just prayed, signed, and let her. Thankfully, she made it back safely, and the school bus driver drove safe.

I also know in my heart that she’s getting older and she’s going to want to do so many different things and go to so many different places that I may not want her to go to, but I know I have to let her start living her life. I can’t stop her from living just because of my fears. So, I had to let her go yesterday.

She had a great time there as well, and was grateful I let her go, and that I trusted God to watch over her.

One thing that irks me about these snowstorms we have – is that when the school tracks the weather and knows it’s supposed to get bad, instead of making it an E-learning day from the beginning, they have kids come to school and decide to call / text / email parents at the last minute – that school is closing early and we need to come get our kids, or they will be going home on the buses.

So, I went to get my little dude early, and came home to wait for my daughter to tell me the bus would be pulling up to the school, so I could go get her.

The snowstorm has passed, and we’re supposed to get another one tonight.

I’m over it.

I’d love to sit here and tell you anything else going on right now, but besides work – I have nothing.

I have been watching a new show on Netflix (Age of attraction).

A reality dating show.

A bunch of men and women are put in a resort / island – whatever – and get to know each other, but the only question they can’t ask – is “How old are you?”. Wild, right? The first couple had my mouth drop when the woman said she was 54 (I believe), and the guy said he was 27. She had 3 kids, and her oldest was 29.

See?

This is why I can’t date anyone in their 20’s. My oldest would have been 26 this year. My older son is 23. My younger daughter is 17 – (18 this year) and 2 years away from 20. My little dude is only 9, but I couldn’t even imagine dating a guy who was just a few years younger or older than my kids.

Youngest I’d go – is middle – late 30’s.

The show is interesting though. If you’re bored – check it out.

I’m on episode 2.

Love you!

💕Shel💕