Because – Snow.

Because – Snow.

Shel R.1 Comment

I’m beginning to think God has a timer up there, and at 4 PM exactly – every day – it goes off and releases SNOW!

I swear – the last week or so, every day like clockwork, same time – it’s snowing.

Last night was no different. It started snowing as soon as I headed to Target at 4 PM.

It got bad really fast, and the drive home – 30 minutes back to my little itty-bitty town – was awful.

This is the time of year where Minnesota people get to play, “Hey, where’d the lines go?”, or “Am I on the right side of the road?” – depending on what you want to call it. ha.

Today, was a little better – since crews cleared the roads pretty quickly for the AM drivers, and I got to work with no issues.

What I didn’t know – was that more heavy and nasty snow was expected today, but this time – it started around 1 PM or so. We had a meeting at work, and after the meeting, I sat at the front desk – looking out at the snow as it started.

Around 1:20 PM, my boss sat next to me and we were chatting, as I told her my kids are getting out of school early due to the predicted snowstorm getting worse, and my older son was picking them up. She asked if I knew anything about the other schools up by my job closing early, and I told her I just knew the school in our town was letting the kids out early, but that I didn’t have to get them because my son was.

I got the email, the call, and the text for it.

She suddenly said, “Let me go make some calls”. I thought she was going to call and see if schools up that way where I work – were closing early because maybe she knew kids who go there or adults who work in those schools, but 10 minutes later, as I stood in the middle of the office – she came and stood next to me and said, “I called Jayla. She’s coming in early, so you can get out of here. I know you’ve got a long drive back and the roads are getting nasty. I want you to get home safe”. Jayla is one of my younger co-workers, and she came in for me.

I didn’t even ask my boss if I could leave early, but the fact that she thought about me driving all the way back to my little town in this weather and released me early – shows what kind of boss she is and I’m so grateful for her. 😊Another one of my co-workers took off as well, and I believe my boss did some of her work and was planning to leave early herself – since she has a pretty long drive home.

I will say that the ride home wasn’t too bad, and the plows were out doing their jobs, but the fact that I feel “snowed in” – sort of sucks. I wanted to be out and about doing Christmas shopping, and getting some errands done, but it is nice being home relaxing at the same time.

The school is starting two hours late tomorrow if nothing changes, but of course – the kids are praying it just closes.

I’m off the next few days, so I don’t have to worry about traveling.

I thought the snow was going to miss us this year or that we’d have a mild, chill winter because as of late November – we didn’t have much snow, but I guess that’s changing. 🙄

So, I plan to maybe get my little dude off his video games the next few days – for once and go use the sled I got him a while back – that he hasn’t touched. Snow angels? Yes. Snowman? Yes. I want to do it all. Heck – maybe a hot chocolate run and photos by the lake where the beautiful Christmas lights are all up and the area near the lake is all decorated. Why not?!

*****

My daughter and I were there yesterday – where we planned to take some of her Senior photos because the deadline is fast approaching and we have to get these done, and one turned in for the yearbook. We took some really cute ones, but she didn’t like them, so we have to go do them again.

I absolutely love this one:

She does, too! Unfortunately, we need a photo for the yearbook – where she’s looking up, and she didn’t like the ones we took.

It started snowing bad last night, so we just came home and decided to try again this week.

Plus, this was inside one of the decorations, and I’d like to get the outside during dusk – where we could make it a little “nicer”.

Just when I thought we were about to get these Senior photos done, Senior quote, Senior wills, etc. – turn those in and be done with everything, I got an email about the Senior class rings. Those are $400+ depending on designs, etc.

When they say Senior year is expensive – they’re not lying!!!!

******

If you want to giggle though – my daughter has liked this boy that I’ll call “Kyle” – for the longest.

She decided to take Psychology this year just for fun. Maybe not just for fun – because she plans to become an EMT / Paramedic in the future, and sometimes they deal with mental health and things Psych related, so she will probably use what she learns one day.

This boy Kyle joined Psychology recently, and she doesn’t know why because she says all he does is play around, sleep, and doesn’t pay attention.

My daughter actually likes this class, and when she found out a few days ago that this boy Kyle is now dating a girl she used to be friends with, she dropped Psychology. She felt like if this girl joined Psychology to be in class with this Kyle kid – my daughter didn’t want to deal with that.

I thought it was goofy that she was dropping a class because of a boy or some girl he was dating that may or may not join the class, but she said she was going to join the Yearbook committee instead. She gets a free yearbook if she’s on the committee, so I was all for that. One less cost I have to pay. So, I supported her decision to drop Psychology and go be on the yearbook committee if it made her happy, less stressed out over this young man and worrying about his girlfriend joining that class.

I supported her wanting to make the change of classes.

I told her do what she felt she needed to do – even if I thought letting some girl run her out of that class – was insane. The girl hadn’t even joined the class yet, nor did we know if she was going to.

Last night, my daughter was upset that she dropped that class without thinking. She said when she found out Kyle and her old friend were dating, she just felt sick, and didn’t want to see them together if this girl did join the class, but now – she could care less and she feels like she’ll miss Psychology. She said she’s not going to let Kyle or her old friend dating – run her out of a class she loves, and she’s just going to deal with it if this girl joins that class.

After her going back and forth about if she should just stay in Psychology or not – especially after her main teacher switched her to the yearbook committee when she asked the other day – I looked at her last night like:

“You need to make up your mind, kid!”.

She decided to stay in Psych, and I was so proud of her for not letting this boy she likes or the girl now dating him – keep her from a class she truly does love and enjoys learning in.

Today, she told her main teacher she’ll just stay in Psych, and I’m sure she’s driving him crazy, too! Still – he’s amazing with her and he switched her back to Psychology.

I giggled about the whole thing.

I did tell her that when she graduates – she may look back on these few years and wonder what the hell she was thinking when it comes to this kid, Kyle. I told her about some of my crushes back in high school and how I look back now and wonder the same.

People change. Feelings change, and years from now – this boy Kyle and this girl he’s dating now – may not even remember each other’s last names and they may go their own ways after graduation, so I’m truly happy my daughter didn’t let this class go – because of them.

I think it’s good for her and her future career.

Teenagers make me laugh with their little puppy love relationships.

I remember those days back in high school.

Matter of fact – one of my really good friends from high school and I – we were talking the other day about guys we had crushes on in high school, and when she heard I had a crush on this boy Anthony back in high school, she laughed at me and did the whole, “Ewwww. What was wrong with you?” (Shame game). lol. I look back now, and I laugh about it myself.

I found out she had a crush on this one guy we went to high school with, and I did the same. We totally had different taste in our guys, but we laughed about the guys we once crushed on in high school, and I hope my daughter can look back and do the same – with laughter and humor about it.

There is one really good young man at the school that I wouldn’t mind my daughter dating.

I’ll call him “Brandon”.

Brandon has really liked my daughter since she started there in 8th grade, and every time school let out, he’d be outside yelling, “BYE, KAILANI!” – so loud – that everyone heard him and looked at him. Daily. It was the cutest thing and I’d tell her, “Say bye to that boy!”. She never wanted to. 🤣

He still likes her. He still talks to her. I still wish she’d give him a chance.

A few days ago, when she was telling me about this boy she likes – dating her old good friend now, she looked up at the sky and said, “God, if you have another guy up there who is good and will treat me right, please send him my way!”. I laughed and told her, “HE DID!!! YOU KEEP FRIEND ZONING HIM!”.

(I was talking about Brandon).

She’s 17. She’s allowed to date now, as long as it’s the right kind of boy and he treats her right, but I’m also not in a hurry for her to date, and I told her to make sure that her graduation is her main focus. She’s a great kid, and she has all her credits so far, and she’s so close to finishing the last ones she needs – so, I’m not worried. Still, I want her to make dating a last priority.

In other news –

We’re almost through the holidays and Christmas will be here soon.

I’ve been finishing up Christmas shopping for the kids. I’ve been trying to figure out what I’m doing for dinner Christmas day. I’ve been trying to get cute little goody bags together for Elijah’s class and putting together gifts for his teacher. I’ve been trying to save for and plan a trip back home to Illinois for Christmas to see my aunt and uncle, and possibly one of my cousins, his wife and son – at the end of this month.

I can’t wait until Christmas is over and I can sit down with a glass or two of wine – relax and wait until New Years eve to get this year over with.

I’m counting down the days until we can pack up the moving truck, turn over the keys to the apartment we’re in now, and leave this small town.

Will we miss it? Sure. It’s been home for the last 5 years, but it’s not really “home”. Illinois is.

While we don’t want to move back to Chicago, we’ve been looking at some places at lease closer to it.

Closer to civilization, more varieties of stores and food places. Closer to friends and family we left behind when we moved to Minnesota years ago.

I’ve been looking for houses in Wisconsin – close to the Illinois border, and some houses in the suburbs of Illinois.

I think when we move, I’ll most miss the very little traffic we have here. I’ll miss the amazing people I’ve met here in Minnesota. I’ll miss going to have coffee with one of my good friends who I’ve become close to here. I’ll miss the school for sure and everyone in it.

I’ll miss the residents I have gotten close to in the facility I work in.

I’ll miss the beautiful night sky that shows the stars so brightly because there’s no tall buildings and no streetlights to stop them from shining brightly.

I’ll miss all the beautiful lakes.

I’ll miss all the good times we had in this apartment and around Minnesota.

So, yes – I’ll miss this place, but I’m also okay if I never see it again. ha.

I won’t miss how gossip spreads so fast here and how everyone is in each other’s business.

I won’t miss the lack of food spots, or stores. The dead mall where nobody goes anymore.

I won’t miss the 30-minute drives to the nearest bigger city and home, or how everything is miles or hours away.

I won’t miss struggling to not hit the deer on super dark roads with no lights at night.

I won’t miss the snow that falls in October sometimes.

I won’t miss the -30, -45-degree weather.

I won’t miss this building I live in, and all the craziness that comes with it.

I will miss the fact that this is the last place I saw my oldest child alive and well, but other than the things I will miss here – I’m ready to get the hell out of here once my youngest daughter graduates.

ESPECIALLY – for a better chance at my dream career.

I’ve been looking and I’ve found some amazing houses – but who knows if they’ll be available when I’m ready? Part of me wants to try to buy a house in early February / March, so when we’re ready to move, we have somewhere set already, but part of me can’t afford rent and a mortgage.

This economy has me walking around like:

haha.

Seriously though – part of me feels like I need to start investing in something, and part of me feels like this economy is NOT “single mama friendly”.

I trust God, and his plan and that’s all I can do.

Ah. I just felt like writing tonight, and I’m about to head to bed because it’s only 8:30, but this mama is tired.

Maybe I’ll go finish reading CAUGHT UP.

If you haven’t read that book yet, it’s great, but you have to read – (LIGHTS OUT) – first, so you can understand (CAUGHT UP) and the relationships between the characters. Both books are by the amazing author “NAVESSA ALLEN”. ❤️ I’ll write about them as soon as I finish Caught up. I’m in the middle of it, and just haven’t had the time to finish because I’m always at work, or running errands, etc.

I just found out from a friend that Navessa now has a 3rd book, “GAME ON!”. Hold on girl. Let me get through the 2nd book. 😁

I like to buy and read books off of Kindle. It’s just easier.

So, let me sign off for the night, open my phone and try to finish this book.

I love you all. Stay warm if it’s cold where you are. Be safe. Behave, and Goodnight.

❤️Shel❤️

A new little life, and this new little job I love.

A new little life, and this new little job I love.

Shel R.Leave a comment

    Hello my loves!

   First of all, let me share some fun news!

I’m going to be an Auntie again!!!! 🥰

Do I know if I’ll ever see the baby? No.

Do I know if I’ll get to be a part of the child’s life? Also no.

Still, the thought of becoming an auntie to a little girl this time – is a little bit exciting. I have two nephews and I adore them. I always get so happy when they see me, run to me and yell, “AUNTIE!”. I miss them tons, as they are back home in Chicago.

My brother has my nephews by his ex-wife.

This new baby that is on the way – she’s by his now ex-fiance. The now ex-fiance wants nothing to do with my brother and a few months ago, she made it clear she isn’t giving the baby my brother’s last name, and she isn’t planning to have my brother there when she delivers the baby.

I think both are really mean if I’m being honest.

Yes, my brother is an idiot, and he’s burned bridges with a lot of people (including his ex-fiancé), but he deserves to see his new baby make her way into this world (especially because he’s always wanted a little girl). I think it’s a little mean not to give the baby his last name, but she’s the mother and it’s her choice.

She cut my brother out of her life, and anyone that’s involved with him – (including me). I’m pretty sure she doesn’t want the baby to know any of us, or her older brothers (my nephews), but I haven’t talked to her, so I don’t know what she’s thinking or where her mind is. 

She refuses to talk to my brother.

I just found out that she has a baby registry set up online, and whether she wants my brother or his family in this baby’s life or not, I plan to grab some things she requested on this baby registry, and send them to her for the baby – because this new baby – is still and forever will be my niece.

I’m still going to love her just as much as I love my nephews and I hope that my brother’s ex-fiancé – allows my brother and I – to know this child. I hope she allows the child to know who we are.🩷

It takes a village to raise a baby, right?

As a single mother myself – I hope my brother’s ex-fiancé allows me to be in her village and help her raise little Ella. (That’s the name she and my brother picked before she decided she wanted nothing to do with him).

So, I have a niece on the way, and I have no idea if I’ll get to meet her or be involved in her life or not, but we shall see. My nephews still have no idea they’re having a little sister.

It’s a bad situation with a beautiful baby attached to it. 

I will admit I wasn’t happy when I heard my brother got this girl pregnant. He had just gotten a divorce, he had just gotten back from deployment, and he wasn’t in the right frame of mind.

Hell, he hadn’t even been with this new girl for very long before she ended up pregnant.

Not to mention he wasn’t financially stable, and he and his now ex-fiancé were already having a lot of problems, but – as the time gets closer – the thought has grown on me, and I just wish the best for my new niece and the parents who created her.

I shall keep you all updated as Ella (Or, whatever he mother names her) – is due next month.

💕💕💕💕💕💕💕

That being said ….

Let’s talk about work!

I’ve been working a LOT – as Christmas is fast approaching and I’ve been trying to finish up Christmas shopping.

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again…..

I worked in the medical field for 9 years with Alzheimer’s / Dementia / behavioral patients, and I was highly stressed, and overworked. Isn’t that how it usually goes in the medical field, though?

I loved my patients and I’ve met so many great ones along the way during those years – that I’ll never forget, but the hours were long, the drama in the medical field between staff can get very catty and crazy, and the pay wasn’t always the greatest. It was rewarding when it came to the sweet people I took care of, but there were a lot of cons to it when it came to the actual work environment and things that the staff dealt with.

Now (?) – now I can actually say I love my job and I love going to work when I’m scheduled.

Staff drama and cattiness at the new job? Of course! It’s at this job as well, but I try to go, mind my business, bite my tongue when I need to, and just make sure the residents in the facility I work in – laugh, and have a great day.

I mentioned before that I finally got away from the medical field and stepped into working in a facility that houses the homeless community, and those with criminal pasts, drug and alcohol addictions, and mental health issues.

I will just say – that while some of our city looks down on them and doesn’t want to deal with them when they hear where they are from because our city sees them as “trouble” or “problems” – if you get to know them on a personal / deeper level … they are some of the sweetest people you’ll ever meet.

Have they made bad choices in life? Yes.

Have they done some stupid sh**? Also, yes.

They will all tell you themselves – their life stories and the traumas and dramas they’ve been through, and the mistakes they’ve made and regret, but many of them are decent people. Many of them are good people who end up in bad situations due to their choices, and they do regret many of the things they’ve done in life.

As I’ve gotten to know all of them more, they make me laugh so much, and I always try to bring giggles to their day as well – as I joke around with them, and make sure they know I care. Some are there for a paycheck, but me? I feel like Michelle Pfeiffer when on the great movie “DANGEROUS MINDS” when someone asks her, “Why do you care anyway? You’re just here for the money”, and she replies with, “Because I make the choice to care, and honey – the money ain’t that good!”.

Believe me when I say the money isn’t that great at all, but I do care about those who live there.

The homeless. The drug addicts. The alcoholics. The criminals.

They’re human. They have feelings and needs – and wants like everyone else, and most of them just want to feel like they matter. 🥺 I try to be there and listen and do that for them.

So, if I can go to work and we can all laugh together and just make my job and them living there a little more fun, why not?!

💕

I’ve gotten to know an elderly man I’ll call Tony. He runs around like crazy looking for things around the building that need to be fixed, and he’ll do it if he can. He looks for projects, or watches things going on – to keep himself busy all day, so he thinks about other things instead of his previous lifestyle. He’s such a sweetheart and he loves to talk.

Sometimes, he’ll just come by the office, hang out and chat with me. Sometimes, he’ll stand there and laugh at his own jokes, and it makes me laugh. Other times, as I watch the cameras, I’ll see him on one – and a few seconds later – he’s down the hall on another and I’m wondering how he got there so fast. Tony is all over the place – all day long, and he’s such a silly, humorous, amazing guy.

He reminds me of Uncle Si from the show (Duck Dynasty). I swear – he looks just like him almost and I always want to ask him if I can start calling him “Uncle Si”, but I don’t want to make it weird. lol. He’s just as goofy as Uncle Si – as well.

For his birthday in a few weeks, he plans to shave his beard and see how it looks. He also told me he would love to have a cape, so he could run around as a “Super Tony” – of course he said his real name, but I can’t here. I was laughing so much and told him if I buy him a cape for his birthday – to tie it around his neck, he has to wear it all day and fly around the building as SUPER TONY. He told me he’s absolutely going to do that!!!!

I do plan to buy him a cape. 😁He said he just wants to feel like a superhero for a day.

A few days ago, he came in from the garden area outside, and I was writing a report.

When I looked up, he had one of the garden statues in his hand. It was a man that looked like he was fishing. I asked why he brought it inside, and he laughed and tells me, “Look! He LITERALLY froze his ass off!”. He held the statue up. It had a big ice / snow bump on it’s bottom.

While I’d love to show the entire photo, I can’t – for privacy reasons of course, but here’s the statue:

He said he was going to let the statue “thaw out”, and then he was going to paint him because he’s a little rusty.

See? He’s always looking for something to do. ha.

I adore this old guy.

💕

We have a woman I’ll call “Mary”. (Obviously – all names are changed for privacy).

Mary and I have gotten close, and she comes down once in a while to chat or get whatever she needs from the office.

I know the guy she’s dating there – works her last nerve, so when she came down and asked me, “Do you have any (body ba)…………….I mean garbage bags?”. We both laughed so hard. My jaw dropped and I joked that she better be careful because there’s this word in the Criminal justice system called, “Premeditated”. She laughed so much, and it’s just good to see them enjoy laughter.

I told her if I didn’t see him with her later, I was going to be asking questions, and she just laughed and laughed.

A lot of them have been through so much and have done so much, that laughter helps them get through their day. The other day – Mary and her boyfriend were having their usual argument, and I went upstairs to go get him out of her apt. and he raised his voice.

I’ve gotten to know her boyfriend “Kevin” pretty well also, and he’s usually respectful, but when he raised his voice at me, I raised mine right back, and told him, “Let’s go! She wants you out! You can either come downstairs and talk to me, and I’ll argue with you if that’s what you’re on today, or you can go to your own apartment, but you have to get out of hers!”. He kind of smiled, and told me that he never gives me trouble, and he did end up leaving her room.

💕

When I first started this job, I was told that if something escalates or kicks off – I will eventually learn how to handle it – once I get to know all of their personalities, what works with them and what doesn’t, and I think I’ve mastered learning how to handle most of them when things get crazy, or escalate.

We have one guy I’ll call “Danny”. He makes me laugh a lot, and he’s usually joking around or in a good mood.

I came in at 7 AM a few days ago, and he was far from a “good mood”. He was screaming, yelling, calling the overnight staff names, and telling them to do their job. He wanted alcohol. Normally, we’d give a little bit, so they don’t get sick from withdrawals, and it’s all controlled – but he didn’t have any available.

When he saw me, he was still angry, and he looked straight at me.

I quickly killed that negativity because I’ve gotten to know Danny and how to deal with him.

I told him, “I just got here! Don’t start nothing with me. You won’t get anything from me all day!”. He grinned – until he broke into a full smile, and he was fine after a while. He did end up getting his little portion.

Withdrawals for some of these people are a real thing. It’s sad, and it’s another reason we have to treat them like humans and give them what they ask for if we can.

My heart hurts for some of the people who live there, so if I can make their lives easier or better in any way – I’m always going to try my best while I’m at work.

I could talk about many of them all day because they’re some great people, and they have feelings, too!

They share stories with me. They admit their faults and mistakes to me.

I play security, bartender, advocate, therapist, problem-solver, etc. – all in one when I’m at work, and I don’t mind it.

It truly is a great job, and it may not pay big bucks – but it’s not the medical field and for that, I’m grateful.

Don’t get me wrong! I truly love and appreciate those in the medical field because it takes a special and very patient person to be in it for years and years and years – and keep going. For me though? I just wanted out, and I wanted to get into something along the lines of Criminal justice – as my degrees are in, and helping people, and I think God brought me right where he wanted me. ❤️

We have a guy named “Cory”.

They’ve had some issues with Cory, but I won’t go into details.

Some of the things I’ve read about him are scary, but he’s always been so calm, super chill, and nice to me.

He’ll come down and ask if I have coffee all the time, because he loves MY coffee. He says the kitchen coffee is so watered down, he could see the bottom of his cup, and he doesn’t like that. You shouldn’t be able to see the bottom of your coffee cup. I giggled and agreed with him. I do make coffee in the office all day long, so some of them know that and come to me for their coffee.

I make mine strong.

Today actually – he got kitchen coffee, and for his 2nd cup – he came to me for office coffee.

I joked and told him, “No! You cheated on my coffee!”. He laughed and told me, “Trust me! It wasn’t worth it. Won’t happen again!”. lol.

Those are the things I enjoy when I go to work and get to joke with my residents, or just be there when they need to vent, talk, cry, smile. When I can listen to them and help them work through whatever they’re dealing with or feeling, that means a lot to them and to me as well. I love that!

So, while I’m not doing the job I wanted to do right now (probation) – again, God brought me where he has me now – for a reason, and I’m so grateful for this job, and the fact that I can make a difference whenever I’m at work. I’m grateful that many of them are happy to see me – and on weekends – me and my son because he works there as well, and they know they’re going to be treated right and taken care of.

Today, one of the ladies told my son that we’re the best two staff members they’ve had in such a long time.

Someone else said the same thing last week, and it makes us feel good 😊

That’s what I’ve been doing.

Preparing for a new niece, getting ready for Christmas and working.

I’m exhausted though, it’s almost Midnight, and I’m off tomorrow, so I’ll absolutely write more – as my brain feels like it’s ready to shut down.

Sleep well my darlings!

❤️Shel❤️

When you can’t sleep – you do some research on trains, and other things.

When you can’t sleep – you do some research on trains, and other things.

Shel R.Leave a comment

So, who was dreaming about me and won’t let me sleep?

Ha.

It’s currently 2:20 AM and I’ve been awake since I went to bed at 9 – something last night.

I’ve just been in bed thinking about different things. Tossing and turning. Thinking some more. Thinking of bills due. Christmas coming up fast. My work schedule. Getting back into a workout routine, and all kinds of stuff. I’ve checked my phone about 20 times, and every time I look – it’s just another 20 minutes or so later.

My mind won’t shut the hell up, and for some crazy reason, my mind went to the train derailment of 1977 – in downtown Chicago.

(Photo taken from Medium).

My mom worked down there at the time if I remember her telling me that correctly.

She was down there when it happened.

I have no idea why I thought about this as I was in bed not able to sleep, but then I started looking up photos on it, reading the story, and remembering my mom talking about it many years ago.

If you want to read the story, check it out. 👇

https://mx-schroeder.medium.com/out-of-the-loop-the-1977-chicago-usa-train-collision-6049663a4fc6

There are more photos on the site.

😶

I don’t really tell many people because it’s not really a big deal – but I like trains. I know – weird fact about me you probably didn’t need to know, but I do. I think they’re really cool, and if I’m being honest – I especially love the freight trains that travel all around the world and have the really creative tagging / drawings on it – from people who shouldn’t be doing it – but some of their artwork is neat.

The fact that these trains go all over, and these taggers are getting their artwork noticed in many different states – is pretty amazing. Okay, okay. I’m Criminal justice. I know it’s illegal and it’s not right to tag on a train car or mark it up – but I’ve seen some hard work put into those masterpieces, and it makes me appreciate art more. I don’t mean the goofy “Let me tag my name on this train car” – garbage. I mean the awesome photos of cartoons that get drawn, or the ones that take time to make something stand out – that the entire world will see – wherever that train car is.

I always wonder if someone creates these beautiful pieces on train cars and thinks to themselves, “Many people in many cities and states will see this and love it!”.

Stuff like (below) – makes me smile and makes me wonder how the hell there’s enough time – to do stuff like this, but again – while wrong and illegal – some of it – is creative.

💕

💕

Just because I started thinking about the train derailment in Chicago in 1977, that got me thinking about train cars I’ve seen with all kinds of drawings and artwork on it. I’m not okay with the tagging and people just being stupid about it – but something like these photos – that go all over the world and make people giggle and smile – I’m not against it!

STILL ILLEGAL THOUGH! STILL NOT A GOOD IDEA TO DO IT!

If you get caught, there’s hefty consequences!!!!

Hell. There are so many different types of trains and different styles, I just appreciate the trains themselves – even without the tagging and beauty of different artwork on them. So, I grabbed my phone, and I was looking up different types of trains, and I came across more train derailments, and why they happen.

What I really wanted to see – was how it looks for a train conductor – driving a train, so I looked up those videos.

Another fun fact about me – is that I once wanted to be a train conductor and drives those huge things, but I know it’s not always sunshine and rainbows, and there’s a lot that goes into it.

I’m telling you! For some reason – I’ve always been fascinated with trains.

Maybe it started when I was a young kid and my friends and I would climb over a fence – to then climb up a hill and onto the train tracks down the block from where I grew up. I loved trains even then, and nothing has changed.

There was one time a police officer was driving by, saw my best friend and I – up on the tracks, and screamed at us to get down. We hopped back over the fence, and once we were back on the ground, he yelled at us – telling us the dangers of being up on the tracks, and how if it derails – we’re in trouble and can be killed up there.

Our brothers were up there, too!

Mine got caught and he had to come down, and my best friend’s brother was hiding behind a wall – laying down, so the cop couldn’t see him. We were told that if he comes back around or sees us up there again, we’d be taken to the station, and our parents would be called. He asked if anyone else was up there with us, and we lied and said no. He asked, “So, that foot I see – isn’t attached to a body?”. lol

We turned to see my best friend’s brother’s foot sticking out from behind the wall. He got in trouble, too!

And –

My best friend lived on a dead-end street, on the 3rd floor – and the train tracks were literally right outside her window, so we could see people in the train and the trains going by, and they could see us if we had our heads sticking out of her bedroom window. We used to wave, and some would wave back. Sometimes, if the train conductor saw us, he’d toot the train horn for us. 😊

So, besides bills, and Christmas – my work schedule and other things on my mind, I was searching train videos of all kinds, and the 1977 derailment in my city back then. Long before I was born. I was searching for photos of train tagging’s – and drawings on trains that people have taken photos of, and I have some myself in one of my old phones.

Still – my mind wouldn’t shut up and let me sleep.

Then, I realized I was hungry and had to get up to eat, so I checked on my little guy, and saw – (as usual) – his cat sleeping right next to him – like Simba does every night. 💕

Just a boy and his fur buddy. 😁

I checked on my other two kids, and snuck to the kitchen to grab something little to eat, and here I am.

Writing for the world – that’s probably all sleeping right now. How does it feel?! haha.

I also found myself looking up reviews for different places I shop, eat, etc. I’m telling you – insomnia is real and it will have me all over the internet looking up things that make no sense at the time, but they’re interesting.

After all that, I started thinking about the people at work. From my amazing co-workers to the residents that we take care of and look out for – I adore them all.

The residents in our care – are homeless and have come to stay at our facility upon approval of whoever helps them pay for it – be it insurance, or whatever, and the case manager they work with.

They have to abide by certain rules, and if they follow those rules – they have a place to stay. If they break them – they can be kicked out. The residents in our care have mental health issues, drug and alcohol addictions, Criminal records, and many have had complicated rough lives, but I wouldn’t want to work anywhere else, because our residents are pretty awesome. 💕

As someone who works in the facility, I know that anything can happen on any given day and sometimes – our lives can be put in danger, but I also know that there’s protocol and the police are right on board with arriving quickly if any one of my co-workers or myself need them, especially if someone who isn’t allowed near the facility or on the property – shows up.

Many times – we’re not even thinking about the dangers of working in this facility when we’re there. We’re vigilant and stay alert of course, but I think the communication between all of my co-workers and myself – is beautiful and we all make sure that if we need our lead staff – we can call them and know that they’ll come handle whatever they need to.

I think the worst that has happened – is a few of them having too much to drink, and we may have to get in between them and whoever they’re arguing with, or let it be known that they don’t want to break their lease and get kicked out – so, “Cut it out!”, and many times – they do stop before anything gets too crazy.

I think it’s about building rapport (trust and mutual respect) with the residents that live there, and the staff – and getting to know all of their personalities, so if something does happen – we can step in and deal with each individual on a personal level – knowing they trust a few of us who work there.

I love it.

I love the residents, and I love going to work, and I never thought I’d say that.

I’ve been in the medical field for so long, and I used to hate going to work, but now that I’m in the field of partial Criminal justice / partial community service and dealing with criminals, homeless residents that now live in the facility, drug and alcohol addicted people – it’s such a rewarding job, and I can now honestly say – I love my job!

Just the other day, one of my most awesome residents came up to me and handed me this:

Isn’t it cute?!

He told me he made it for me, and it’s not much – but he thought it was nice.

I absolutely love it and told him that for me – it’s the little things that matter, and that I was going to put it on display on my kitchen counter at home – and I sure did! 😊

Many of them are such sweet and kind people, but because of what they’ve been through and have done in their lives – they need to know they can trust us staff members, and I try to make sure they know they can come to me and I’m going to do whatever I can for them – just like a few of my co-workers who go above and beyond.

It’s not just a paycheck for me!

While I couldn’t sleep, all of that was running through my mind because we have some residents who probably won’t ever get better, get help, or change – and I hate that, but I respect their choices. They’ve been this way for so long, they don’t know any other lifestyle. For some residents – they’re not doing well, and they know they’re not going to be on this earth long, so they choose to live reckless and do what they want to do, and we can’t stop that.

So – where I work – we laugh, we love, we show compassion and kindness and just be there whenever these residents need us.

I thought about work as well. Not just trains, bills, Christmas and whatever else.

Listen, I’ve eaten. I’ve written. It’s 3:13 AM, and I have to be up for work at 5, so I should probably try to again to get some sleep. I know I’ll be drinking a lot of Coffee later today.

I will catch up with all of you and what’s going on in your lives later tonight.

Have a beautiful and blessed day!

💕Shel💕

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Shel R.21 Comments

I am finally back!

I took a break from writing for a little bit and decided to delete all of my posts here – because a few friends of mine use Blogger and absolutely love it. I checked it out and I THOUGHT I absolutely loved it, too!

Turns out there’s a lot more that goes into it – than WP, and it’s a whole headache. A lot more than it’s worth. I will say I love the way other people who are used to Blogger – set up their blogs there, but I now see that I’m more of WP gal, and I regret leaving for a while.

Don’t worry! WP gave me hell logging back in because when I finally did – I was locked out and it took me days to finally figure out how to get back in, since my password and login link weren’t working.

I tried a different site after that, but that was a mess.

I decided to maybe try “XANGA” – which is where I blogged back in high school. Did you know that’s no longer up and running? As far as I saw. Those were some good times.

With that being said – I came back to WP, and I’m so grateful I left my site up, and didn’t delete this – despite deleting the posts I had here. I shall never leave WP again. 🙄

I want to also say:

I know sometimes I don’t feel like it or think it – but I am truly blessed.

I’m grateful for still being here at 43 to watch my kids grow, and I hope the good Lord gives me many – many – more years for that.

I am grateful for all we have and for our health.

I am grateful for so many things – I would be here all day.

I am definitely grateful the kids wanted a quick and easy dinner tonight.

They didn’t want the Turkey we have every year because it takes too long to cook, and they had such a taste for tacos, so we did something different, went against tradition, and had Chicken tacos for our Thanksgiving dinner.

I still made stuffing, potatoes, and so on. We still had cornbread, and so many other things.

I made cake and we had the Pumpkin pie my younger daughter loves so much.

It was nice. It was a fast and easy clean up, we watched Home alone together and enjoyed some video games.

There weren’t many photos. We decided to leave the selfies and the phones alone. We just enjoyed time together. 💕 I think many times during the holidays; I’m so caught up in taking all these photos and making memories – that I forget to just make the memories and leave my phone alone. Today, I took some photos, but I didn’t force my kids to smile for the camera – or to get in front of the tree for Thanksgiving pictures like I do every year.

I just enjoyed my time with them and focused on the memories and those moments we had today.

As today comes to an end, I just popped open a bottle of wine, poured a glass, and struggled with getting back into this account (and did!).

The older kids are in their rooms winding down now. My little guy is on the couch watching a movie. The leftovers have been put away, and I work tomorrow – so it’s going to be early bedtime for me.

I just wanted to say hello again, and Happy Thanksgiving to all of you.

I hope yours went as smoothly as mine did!

Love you!

💕Shel💕