Tag: home

Missing home.

Missing home.

Shel R.1 Comment

So, Tuesday – I got a call from my brother’s ex-wife telling me some heartbreaking news about my oldest nephew.

He’s only 9, but he’s dealing with some things that involve his mental health.

It’s not my business to share everything, so I’m going to leave it at that, but I know that whenever my nephews see Auntie (me) and their cousins (my kids), they get so excited and happy.

So, I decided that we’d leave Minnesota and head to IL. on Wednesday morning – to surprise them. We’d take my oldest nephew out first – while his little brother is in school, and then we’d pick up his brother from school and spend the rest of the day with both of them.

We arrived in IL. Wednesday night, and I was a little skeptical about our hotel because it wasn’t the usual one we’ve stayed at before. Still, I wanted to try something new, and I don’t regret it.

It was a lot better than the one we always stay in.

This one – we had to literally climb onto the beds because they were so high off the floor.

We call my youngest daughter “Mousey” because she’s short and little, so we laughed when she asked how the heck she was supposed to get up onto her bed. She struggled for a few minutes, but she did it! lol.

We laughed even more when her feet couldn’t touch the floor.

Wednesday night was just a chill night.

We ordered food, watched T.V. and knocked out pretty early, since we got there so late.

It felt good to be back home in IL. and I was happy that this hotel was so nice.

We were on the 2nd floor, and right when we stepped outside of our hotel door, we were able to see right over the banister – downstairs to the front desk, so my kids enjoyed the fact that I could stand outside of our hotel room, and watch them go downstairs for snacks in the little hotel store area. I felt better knowing I could see them get their snacks, get on the elevator and wait for them to get off of it – because the elevator was right by the hotel room as well.

Thursday, we were up pretty early to go grab my oldest nephew (T.J.).

He had no idea we were coming, so we stopped at Starbucks (right next door to the hotel), and my kids laughed so much when I was saying “HELLO” to a big menu and a pole – that I thought was the speaker.

When I realized I was saying “HELLO” to this pole, I pulled up to the next menu where the real speaker was.

When we ordered and got our stuff, my drink had this on the cup:

With the exclamation and all!

My daughter thinks they heard me yelling HELLO to the pole, and this was making fun of me. 🤣

To that I say – WHAT-EV-ER! ha.

We grabbed my nephew.

His mom told him she had to run something downstairs and brought him with. When he saw us – his face lit up so much, and he literally RAN to us and jumped into my arms. ❤️

We talked for a few seconds, before his mom and I talked, and I asked if he wanted to come hang out with us. He smiled so big and said yes.

We stopped for breakfast at IHOP. I miss IHOP. We don’t have that here in our neck of the woods (Minnesota). It may be in the bigger cities’ – hours away, but not where we are. So, we went to IHOP, and I had to take a photo of a sign that said, “REACHING ACROSS THE TABLE IS PERMITTED”.

I told my daughter they must have put that up for her – because she’ll order her own food and then reach over the table to dig into other people’s food. I told her one day – she’s going to get on her future boyfriends’ nerves. 😁 She had ordered Chocolate Chip pancakes once when we went out to eat, and she was eating my Biscuits and Gravy instead.

After we had breakfast, my daughter wanted to go to TOYS R’ US that just opened in the mall across the street.

I miss that mall! I love Harlem / Irving Plaza (also known in Chicago as THE HIP!)

Great memories from years of shopping here.

This is where I used to go to get all my fun pager covers as a teenager. Who else had a pager?

This is where my best friend and I used to go when we cut classes in high school. Please don’t do that!

I regret every minute of cutting classes and wish I did NOT back then, but anytime we came here – it was so much fun. It changed a lot since then, but it’s still a great mall, and it’s always usually so busy.

So, we went to Toys R’ Us and looked around for a bit. It’s absolutely nothing like the real Toys R’ Us from my childhood, but it was still fun.

I want to visit BABIES R’ US one day. I heard that made a comeback as well, and that’s where I used to shop for all of my kid’s things when they were babies. ❤️

We got a few goodies, and when we left here – we walked through the mall for a bit.

My daughter had money on her, so she ended up buying my little dude some things, and he loved walking through the mall with his big old bag in his hand.

We left the mall and tried to figure out what else to do – to keep us busy until 3 PM when my youngest nephew got out of school.

Their mom said it’d be okay if we wanted to pick him up early, so she ended up calling the school for an early dismissal, and we went to surprise him there.

When we walked in, the principal yelled out, “So, you’re the magical Auntie I keep hearing about!”.

She gave me the biggest hug, and we talked about what was going on with my nephew, and she thanked me for all the support I give my nephews and their mother. I apologized to her for my brother not really being the dad he needs to be or should be, but I did tell her that my nephews and their mom have a lot of support, including mine.

She told me that she hears a lot about me, and she’s so glad to finally meet me.

She brought another lady who she wanted us to meet, and we all sat there and talked for a bit, while we waited for my younger nephew to come downstairs to the office.

When he saw us, he smiled so big, ran to his locker to get his things and gave us the biggest hugs when he got to the office.

We ended up going bowling.

My nephew T.J. and my kiddo, Eli.

T.J. won the game.

My daughter and I were competing against each other, and we had so much fun.

The kids had so much fun.

After that, we went to eat at DUKES.

It was late in the afternoon by then, and the kids were hungry, so I figured we’d stop by here.

I miss DUKES. I used to go there all the time when my kids were small, and I haven’t been there in so long. It seems like the neighborhood I grew up in – has changed so much, and some things are no longer there, so on the way to DUKES, I prayed it was still standing and open.

I haven’t been there in SIX years, since moving to Minnesota.

If you’re ever in Chicago and want a good hotdog or burger – or even a great Italian Beef sandwich – this is the place to get them. (Elston and Central) if I remember correctly.

We then stopped at the bookstore because I wanted to pick up a copy of Bunnie XO’s new book.

The kids stayed in the car with my daughter – while I ran into BARNES & NOBLE to get this.

I miss Barnes & Noble.

I used to go there all the time when we lived in Chicago.

You know I love to read and I love books, so it felt so good to be back in B&N.

Also, I love Bunnie Xo. Say what you want about her or her past, but she’s so real about it, hides NOTHING, and tries her best to help steer other young women in the right direction, so they don’t go the route she did.

She’s such a sweetheart and I hear that she’ll do anything to help those in need.

People really do change!

She’s open and honest about who she was and she’s so proud of who she is now.

So, I wanted to read her story.

She has also become A New York Times best seller with this book. So, Congrats to Bunnie XO.

Anyway, after the bookstore – the kids saw FIVE BELOW across the way and asked if we could go there.

I miss FIVE BELOW. lol

I miss everything back home that we don’t have here in our area in Minnesota, so I was more than happy to take them.

I suggested to my nephews that we throw a goody bag of cute gifts together for their mom because she deals with a lot of this stuff by herself – without my brother’s help, and now – she’s dealing with this new situation with my older nephew – alone as well. My brother isn’t really doing much, so – to make her smile – the boys helped me pick out some things for her, and we put them in a cute bag.

Meanwhile, I had no idea where my children went.

My daughter took my little dude and said they’d be back.

I begged her to watch him so closely, but I knew she would. She’s responsible.

A little while later, my kids came back and handed me a gift bag. My daughter said she heard my idea to have my nephews pick out things for their mom, so my daughter and son went to pick out some cute things for me! 😁❤️ How adorable is that?!!!!!! They are so thoughtful, and I was so grateful!

My kids got me a few keychains they knew I’d love. They got me a STITCH balloon because they know I love Lilo and Stitch. They got me a STITCH Pillow and a cute STITCH plushie wearing a Skeleton costume, some of my favorite candies and an amazing Coconut candle because they know I love anything Coconut scented.

I absolutely love my kids and how they think about me often.

We went a few other places after that, and after a long day and it being late – I took my nephews back home. They had a great day. We had a great day with them, and they were so happy and tired.

They were not happy that I got a hotel room WITHOUT THEM – as they said (lol), but they made their own plans to come swimming at the hotel on Friday. I told them we’d see, but they kept asking what time I was coming to get them. I planned to maybe go get them and order pizza, but we had so much to do on Friday morning, that plans changed.

We were running around town – (just my kiddos and I) – going to different shops and places.

My daughter wanted to go clothes shopping because she needed some new things.

I wanted to stop at the VOLO MUSUEM antique stores because anytime I’m in IL. – I must pick up some new 90’s trolls. I collect them, and I always go see if they have new ones.

This time – I only found one I really liked.

I call her “GRANDMA”. 🤣

I was about to pay for her, but my daughter whipped out her debit card and told me she wanted to buy GRANDMA for me. I tried to pay still, but my daughter wouldn’t let me.

She’s such a sweetheart.

We were treating each other the last few days.

I brought her a beanie she wanted.

She treated me to other things she surprised me with. I treated her to things she wanted.

There’s so many things at the VOLO – so many antiques to take photos of, I’d be there all day, but – I snapped a few.

My kids laughed when I said I wore pants like these in high school, and I said it’s sad that they’re in an ANTIQUE mall now. They joked that I’M antique!

In the words of Stephanie Tanner from Full House:

The VOLO always makes me smile because there’s so many things I remember from my childhood.

These are perfect for anyone’s gaming room / bedroom if you grew up back then.
My grandma and grandpa had radios like that when I was growing up. 😁
My brother had an entire village of LITTLE PEOPLE when he was a kid. It’s crazy to think they’re “antiques / old school” now.
If you haven’t seen the VOLO museum episode – go check it out.

They say the VOLO is haunted, especially by SHADOWMAN, and they’ll have notes posted of the ghost “hot spots” around.

My little dude loves looking for these.

Looking for a Cabbage Patch? The VOLO has plenty! I had some when I was a little girl.

I remember all of us kids and teens trading cards, bubble gum and stickers of our favorite shows growing up, and ELF was one show I watched all the time, so this was pretty cool to see.

My daughter and I were talking about how wild it is – to think how old much of this stuff is, and who owned it way back then. Some of these antiques are so expensive and fragile.

If you’re ever in IL. – go check this place out.

The VOLO mall has tons of cars from movies, shows, and famous people, and the antique stores have plenty of old school memories and goodies.

After the VOLO, we went clothes shopping.

We went to get PANDA EXPRESS for my older son, because he didn’t go with us to IL. and wanted us to bring him some back. We were leaving Saturday morning, and I didn’t want to forget it. So, we just threw it in the fridge at the hotel, so it’d stay semi-fresh.

Friday – we also had to stop at STAKE N’ SHAKE!

I miss Stake N’ Shake.

Again, it’s another place we don’t have here in Minnesota, and the FRISCO MELTS and Shakes – are amazing.

The kids got M&M / Oreo shakes, and I got the Banana.

When we finally got done running around shopping and getting whatever we needed, we stopped at an ice cream shop my mom told us about years ago, and we’ve loved it ever since.

Check them out as well if you’re ever in IL.

They have all kinds of Chocolate and other candies / goodies. Ice cream. Fudge. Taffy apples of all kinds, and so much more.

We got Ice cream and went back to the hotel.

The kids went swimming, and I sat there watching them – as I was looking up weather in Minnesota for Saturday when we would be heading back. I heard there was freezing rain and supposed to be snow, but thankfully – we didn’t run into any of that.

After swimming for a while, the kids wanted to go back to the room, dry off and order pizza.

We went to sleep soon after and headed back to Minnesota early yesterday morning.

I hate driving back to Minnesota in the dark, so we got a headstart to drive while it was still daylight.

We’re back.

I hate it.

I want to go back to IL.

I miss it.

I miss everyone out there, and the places we don’t have here.

I don’t miss the traffic and the cars that think the road is their racetrack, but I do miss home.

So very much!

I came home yesterday, put everything away, my daughter started laundry and we relaxed, but today – it’s packing and getting rid of things we don’t use or need – because I want to be back home this summer if possible.

I didn’t even want to come back to Minnesota, but here we are. Back in it. Not by choice.

It was good to be home for a while, and to be in places we haven’t seen in so long, and it always does my soul good.

Hopefully, we only have two more months here because my daughter graduates soon, and we want to have the moving truck in the parking lot that same day – if all goes well.

My loves….

Have a wonderful Sunday.

XOXO

❤️Shel❤️

Because – Snow.

Because – Snow.

Shel R.1 Comment

I’m beginning to think God has a timer up there, and at 4 PM exactly – every day – it goes off and releases SNOW!

I swear – the last week or so, every day like clockwork, same time – it’s snowing.

Last night was no different. It started snowing as soon as I headed to Target at 4 PM.

It got bad really fast, and the drive home – 30 minutes back to my little itty-bitty town – was awful.

This is the time of year where Minnesota people get to play, “Hey, where’d the lines go?”, or “Am I on the right side of the road?” – depending on what you want to call it. ha.

Today, was a little better – since crews cleared the roads pretty quickly for the AM drivers, and I got to work with no issues.

What I didn’t know – was that more heavy and nasty snow was expected today, but this time – it started around 1 PM or so. We had a meeting at work, and after the meeting, I sat at the front desk – looking out at the snow as it started.

Around 1:20 PM, my boss sat next to me and we were chatting, as I told her my kids are getting out of school early due to the predicted snowstorm getting worse, and my older son was picking them up. She asked if I knew anything about the other schools up by my job closing early, and I told her I just knew the school in our town was letting the kids out early, but that I didn’t have to get them because my son was.

I got the email, the call, and the text for it.

She suddenly said, “Let me go make some calls”. I thought she was going to call and see if schools up that way where I work – were closing early because maybe she knew kids who go there or adults who work in those schools, but 10 minutes later, as I stood in the middle of the office – she came and stood next to me and said, “I called Jayla. She’s coming in early, so you can get out of here. I know you’ve got a long drive back and the roads are getting nasty. I want you to get home safe”. Jayla is one of my younger co-workers, and she came in for me.

I didn’t even ask my boss if I could leave early, but the fact that she thought about me driving all the way back to my little town in this weather and released me early – shows what kind of boss she is and I’m so grateful for her. 😊Another one of my co-workers took off as well, and I believe my boss did some of her work and was planning to leave early herself – since she has a pretty long drive home.

I will say that the ride home wasn’t too bad, and the plows were out doing their jobs, but the fact that I feel “snowed in” – sort of sucks. I wanted to be out and about doing Christmas shopping, and getting some errands done, but it is nice being home relaxing at the same time.

The school is starting two hours late tomorrow if nothing changes, but of course – the kids are praying it just closes.

I’m off the next few days, so I don’t have to worry about traveling.

I thought the snow was going to miss us this year or that we’d have a mild, chill winter because as of late November – we didn’t have much snow, but I guess that’s changing. 🙄

So, I plan to maybe get my little dude off his video games the next few days – for once and go use the sled I got him a while back – that he hasn’t touched. Snow angels? Yes. Snowman? Yes. I want to do it all. Heck – maybe a hot chocolate run and photos by the lake where the beautiful Christmas lights are all up and the area near the lake is all decorated. Why not?!

*****

My daughter and I were there yesterday – where we planned to take some of her Senior photos because the deadline is fast approaching and we have to get these done, and one turned in for the yearbook. We took some really cute ones, but she didn’t like them, so we have to go do them again.

I absolutely love this one:

She does, too! Unfortunately, we need a photo for the yearbook – where she’s looking up, and she didn’t like the ones we took.

It started snowing bad last night, so we just came home and decided to try again this week.

Plus, this was inside one of the decorations, and I’d like to get the outside during dusk – where we could make it a little “nicer”.

Just when I thought we were about to get these Senior photos done, Senior quote, Senior wills, etc. – turn those in and be done with everything, I got an email about the Senior class rings. Those are $400+ depending on designs, etc.

When they say Senior year is expensive – they’re not lying!!!!

******

If you want to giggle though – my daughter has liked this boy that I’ll call “Kyle” – for the longest.

She decided to take Psychology this year just for fun. Maybe not just for fun – because she plans to become an EMT / Paramedic in the future, and sometimes they deal with mental health and things Psych related, so she will probably use what she learns one day.

This boy Kyle joined Psychology recently, and she doesn’t know why because she says all he does is play around, sleep, and doesn’t pay attention.

My daughter actually likes this class, and when she found out a few days ago that this boy Kyle is now dating a girl she used to be friends with, she dropped Psychology. She felt like if this girl joined Psychology to be in class with this Kyle kid – my daughter didn’t want to deal with that.

I thought it was goofy that she was dropping a class because of a boy or some girl he was dating that may or may not join the class, but she said she was going to join the Yearbook committee instead. She gets a free yearbook if she’s on the committee, so I was all for that. One less cost I have to pay. So, I supported her decision to drop Psychology and go be on the yearbook committee if it made her happy, less stressed out over this young man and worrying about his girlfriend joining that class.

I supported her wanting to make the change of classes.

I told her do what she felt she needed to do – even if I thought letting some girl run her out of that class – was insane. The girl hadn’t even joined the class yet, nor did we know if she was going to.

Last night, my daughter was upset that she dropped that class without thinking. She said when she found out Kyle and her old friend were dating, she just felt sick, and didn’t want to see them together if this girl did join the class, but now – she could care less and she feels like she’ll miss Psychology. She said she’s not going to let Kyle or her old friend dating – run her out of a class she loves, and she’s just going to deal with it if this girl joins that class.

After her going back and forth about if she should just stay in Psychology or not – especially after her main teacher switched her to the yearbook committee when she asked the other day – I looked at her last night like:

“You need to make up your mind, kid!”.

She decided to stay in Psych, and I was so proud of her for not letting this boy she likes or the girl now dating him – keep her from a class she truly does love and enjoys learning in.

Today, she told her main teacher she’ll just stay in Psych, and I’m sure she’s driving him crazy, too! Still – he’s amazing with her and he switched her back to Psychology.

I giggled about the whole thing.

I did tell her that when she graduates – she may look back on these few years and wonder what the hell she was thinking when it comes to this kid, Kyle. I told her about some of my crushes back in high school and how I look back now and wonder the same.

People change. Feelings change, and years from now – this boy Kyle and this girl he’s dating now – may not even remember each other’s last names and they may go their own ways after graduation, so I’m truly happy my daughter didn’t let this class go – because of them.

I think it’s good for her and her future career.

Teenagers make me laugh with their little puppy love relationships.

I remember those days back in high school.

Matter of fact – one of my really good friends from high school and I – we were talking the other day about guys we had crushes on in high school, and when she heard I had a crush on this boy Anthony back in high school, she laughed at me and did the whole, “Ewwww. What was wrong with you?” (Shame game). lol. I look back now, and I laugh about it myself.

I found out she had a crush on this one guy we went to high school with, and I did the same. We totally had different taste in our guys, but we laughed about the guys we once crushed on in high school, and I hope my daughter can look back and do the same – with laughter and humor about it.

There is one really good young man at the school that I wouldn’t mind my daughter dating.

I’ll call him “Brandon”.

Brandon has really liked my daughter since she started there in 8th grade, and every time school let out, he’d be outside yelling, “BYE, KAILANI!” – so loud – that everyone heard him and looked at him. Daily. It was the cutest thing and I’d tell her, “Say bye to that boy!”. She never wanted to. 🤣

He still likes her. He still talks to her. I still wish she’d give him a chance.

A few days ago, when she was telling me about this boy she likes – dating her old good friend now, she looked up at the sky and said, “God, if you have another guy up there who is good and will treat me right, please send him my way!”. I laughed and told her, “HE DID!!! YOU KEEP FRIEND ZONING HIM!”.

(I was talking about Brandon).

She’s 17. She’s allowed to date now, as long as it’s the right kind of boy and he treats her right, but I’m also not in a hurry for her to date, and I told her to make sure that her graduation is her main focus. She’s a great kid, and she has all her credits so far, and she’s so close to finishing the last ones she needs – so, I’m not worried. Still, I want her to make dating a last priority.

In other news –

We’re almost through the holidays and Christmas will be here soon.

I’ve been finishing up Christmas shopping for the kids. I’ve been trying to figure out what I’m doing for dinner Christmas day. I’ve been trying to get cute little goody bags together for Elijah’s class and putting together gifts for his teacher. I’ve been trying to save for and plan a trip back home to Illinois for Christmas to see my aunt and uncle, and possibly one of my cousins, his wife and son – at the end of this month.

I can’t wait until Christmas is over and I can sit down with a glass or two of wine – relax and wait until New Years eve to get this year over with.

I’m counting down the days until we can pack up the moving truck, turn over the keys to the apartment we’re in now, and leave this small town.

Will we miss it? Sure. It’s been home for the last 5 years, but it’s not really “home”. Illinois is.

While we don’t want to move back to Chicago, we’ve been looking at some places at lease closer to it.

Closer to civilization, more varieties of stores and food places. Closer to friends and family we left behind when we moved to Minnesota years ago.

I’ve been looking for houses in Wisconsin – close to the Illinois border, and some houses in the suburbs of Illinois.

I think when we move, I’ll most miss the very little traffic we have here. I’ll miss the amazing people I’ve met here in Minnesota. I’ll miss going to have coffee with one of my good friends who I’ve become close to here. I’ll miss the school for sure and everyone in it.

I’ll miss the residents I have gotten close to in the facility I work in.

I’ll miss the beautiful night sky that shows the stars so brightly because there’s no tall buildings and no streetlights to stop them from shining brightly.

I’ll miss all the beautiful lakes.

I’ll miss all the good times we had in this apartment and around Minnesota.

So, yes – I’ll miss this place, but I’m also okay if I never see it again. ha.

I won’t miss how gossip spreads so fast here and how everyone is in each other’s business.

I won’t miss the lack of food spots, or stores. The dead mall where nobody goes anymore.

I won’t miss the 30-minute drives to the nearest bigger city and home, or how everything is miles or hours away.

I won’t miss struggling to not hit the deer on super dark roads with no lights at night.

I won’t miss the snow that falls in October sometimes.

I won’t miss the -30, -45-degree weather.

I won’t miss this building I live in, and all the craziness that comes with it.

I will miss the fact that this is the last place I saw my oldest child alive and well, but other than the things I will miss here – I’m ready to get the hell out of here once my youngest daughter graduates.

ESPECIALLY – for a better chance at my dream career.

I’ve been looking and I’ve found some amazing houses – but who knows if they’ll be available when I’m ready? Part of me wants to try to buy a house in early February / March, so when we’re ready to move, we have somewhere set already, but part of me can’t afford rent and a mortgage.

This economy has me walking around like:

haha.

Seriously though – part of me feels like I need to start investing in something, and part of me feels like this economy is NOT “single mama friendly”.

I trust God, and his plan and that’s all I can do.

Ah. I just felt like writing tonight, and I’m about to head to bed because it’s only 8:30, but this mama is tired.

Maybe I’ll go finish reading CAUGHT UP.

If you haven’t read that book yet, it’s great, but you have to read – (LIGHTS OUT) – first, so you can understand (CAUGHT UP) and the relationships between the characters. Both books are by the amazing author “NAVESSA ALLEN”. ❤️ I’ll write about them as soon as I finish Caught up. I’m in the middle of it, and just haven’t had the time to finish because I’m always at work, or running errands, etc.

I just found out from a friend that Navessa now has a 3rd book, “GAME ON!”. Hold on girl. Let me get through the 2nd book. 😁

I like to buy and read books off of Kindle. It’s just easier.

So, let me sign off for the night, open my phone and try to finish this book.

I love you all. Stay warm if it’s cold where you are. Be safe. Behave, and Goodnight.

❤️Shel❤️