Christmas is over! Say what?!!!!!

December 26, 2025December 26, 2025 Shel R.2 Comments

Months of planning. Months of shopping and wrapping. Months of preparing. One night of playing Santa and doing everything he’s supposed to do. Hours of cooking and cleaning up – And you mean to tell me it’s all over now?!

When I was a little girl, we used to go to my grandma Shirley’s / Pap-Pap (grandpa’s) place for Christmas eve.

All of my aunts and uncles were there.

All of my cousins were there.

Life was good.

The adults would be in the kitchen cooking, talking, drinking, laughing, or in the dining room around the table – joking around and having a good time. The men would be outside smoking, and us cousins – we were in the living room – just waiting to open gifts and teasing each other.

The Christmas bells outside of their house played music. They had some awesome Christmas lights lining their front windows, and everything was decorated inside.

Those we good times.

After a while, my Pap-pap passed, and grandma moved somewhere else, so my uncle was hosting Christmas at his place.

The adults would be upstairs, while us cousins were in the basement getting into mischief.

I remember one Christmas when one of my cousins was opening his gift from someone, held it up and yelled, “YYYYEESSS!”. Our grandma asked if he knew what it was, and he said, “No!”. lol. Someone told him it was socks. He had us laughing when he looked at a few of us cousins and whispered (sarcastically), “Just what I’ve always wanted. Now, I just have to wait to open a pair of Chonies!”. (Underwear). 🤣

One of my favorite Christmas memories – is when my Uncle L. went to the store next to my Uncle T’s house, and he told me and one of my cousins not to open the door for ANYONE. Nobody. He said he meant that, too!

So, when he came back and he was knocking to get in, my cousin asked who it was. My Uncle L. yelled my cousins name and told him to stop playing and open the door because it was cold out there. My cousin looked at me and smiled as we sat on the stairs right by the door. He yelled back, “You said not to let ANYONE in. NOBODY! You meant that, too!”. We laughed so much, and as my uncle continued to bang on the door and yell for us to open it, my cousin kept laughing and telling him, “But dad – you said….”.

When he finally got in, my uncle told his son, “Remind me to kick your ass later!”. 😁

I loved hanging out with certain cousins during Christmas at my grandma or uncles house.

Christmas at Grandma Shirley’s / Pap-Pap’s and Uncle Ts was fun because they always had the music blasted with either Christmas music or Mexican music. It alternated, went back and forth, and many times – family would dance and mingle.

People passing by could hear the music from outside and know there was a big party going on.

This is one of the photos I have from one of the many Christmas Eve parties at my grandma Shirley and Pap-pap’s place.

Unfortunately, I don’t have many photos of back then, but this is one I do have that I love.

A few of my cousins and me.

I’m in the white and black dress with the cheesy smile. ❤️As you can tell, they couldn’t get us all to look and smile at the same time, but that’s how pictures usually went. Some of my cousins were always ready, and some of them were always joking around and not taking it seriously. ha.

Christmas was always filled with so much laughter, love and good memories from Christmas Eve at my grandma Shirley and Pap-pap’s house, to the ones we spent at my uncle T’s house, and then rushing home to get to bed before Santa came. On Christmas Day – my other aunt and uncle on my mom’s side – would come over to my Yia-Yia’s place – who lived downstairs from us – and we’d celebrate Christmas day there, opening more gifts, eating more good food, and enjoying more love, laughter, and good memories being made.

As we got older – family traditions of going to anyone’s house kind of faded away little by little, and eventually – it just became about main family. Everyone started doing their own things, and when my parents moved into a new place, we started getting together there. Just my brother, his now ex-wife, his family and me and my kids. That was it. That became our new Christmas / holiday tradition.

We still had fun though.

Eventually, Christmas was at my brother’s place.

So, Christmas had changed a lot over the years, but I still hold on to some great memories of people, places and funny stuff from each and every one of them – no matter how or where we celebrated it.

One tradition I miss – that no longer happens – is the Christmas gift wars between my brother and me.

My mom used to call us “idiots” because we’d be trying to open prank gifts from each other for 20-40 minutes each year. We did our Christmas prank wars every year for many years, and we’d always try to top the last year by making each gift harder and harder to open for the other.

One year – my brother wrapped so much string around my gift and then zip-tied it.

I got through all of the string and the zip-ties – only for it to be this:

It says, “You just wasted all that time for this!”.

The following year, I zip-tied his, bubble wrapped it, and did so many other things to make it hard for him to open, only for him to finally get it open and see this:

“KARMA!”. lol.

He threw it behind him and tried not to laugh.

One year – he got me good though. I won’t lie.

I love trolls! The crazy-wild haired, big eyed 90’s trolls.

I walked into my parent’s house for Christmas one year, and he pointed at a bag and told me, “No jokes this year. No Christmas prank wars. This is your gift right here, but you can’t open it yet!”. I saw a little bit of it when I looked down, and I was so excited when I saw a few parts of TROLL HAIR! I couldn’t wait to open it and thought he got me new ones.

That night after dinner – when we were all opening gifts, he told one of my kids, “Give your mother that gift right there from me”. One of my kids handed it to me, and I opened it. I noticed it was three trolls that I already have, so I asked where he got them from to maybe exchange them, because I said I already had them. He and my mother laughed and he told me, “No, you HAD them! Those are yours!”.

He stole a few trolls from the top of my fridge in my kitchen when he came over a few weeks before, and I didn’t even know they were missing. My mother was laughing so hard at the fact that I was so confused and had no idea how he grabbed them without me noticing. 🙄

I admit – that was a good one.

One year, I purchased a safe at the store, put his REAL gift inside of it, and locked the safe.

It was a combo safe, and I only I had the combination that came with it.

When he unwrapped it, I told him that his real gift was inside if he could crack the code.

It literally took him 5 minutes, and he had the safe open without breaking it or anything.

My jaw dropped and I sat there wondering how the hell he got it open so fast without the combination.

He made me laugh when he said, “I’m in the Military. You’d be surprised what I could do!”.

Then again, it was a cheap safe I purchased as a joke, so maybe they all had the same combos?!

Sadly, my brother is dealing with a lot of stuff these days and other issues, so we don’t talk much and living so far away from each other doesn’t help either. Our yearly Christmas gift wars – have stopped, but those will always be some of my best Christmas memories. 💕

I’ll never forget the Christmas my kids and I went to his house – and I walked in to see him like:

I laughed so much at his outfit.

It lit up, too!

Our dad was in the hospital, and he said he was going to the hospital to see our father – just like this. I asked if he was serious and he made me giggle when he says, “I don’t have anyone to impress!”.

I also remember the Christmas when he was telling everyone, “You get wrapping paper for Christmas! You get wrapping paper for Christmas! You get wrapping paper for Christmas!”, as he pointed at everyone and had us all laughing.

Other favorite Christmas memories I’ll always cherish:

Always taking my kids to BASS PRO SHOP to see Santa and do some of their Christmas activities.

On this day – Santa asked my two older kids if they’ve been good all year.

I laughed so much when they both looked at each other and didn’t know what to say.

Do we lie or do we tell the truth?! 😁

No matter how old my kids have gotten, Bass Pro shop around Christmas time was the place to be.

We don’t have one close by anymore, and I hate that – now that we live off the grid practically.

Family tradition for years now every Christmas – has been going to my aunt and uncles on my mom’s side to celebrate Christmas with them. We love it there, and although they have a new house now, this house (above) held so many good memories as well. If I could buy that house that they had before, I absolutely would!

Every Christmas for years – my mom used to just love to sit down, relax and talk to my kids. This was one of those times – where she sat and had some funny conversations with my two older kids. 💕

Same house my aunt and uncle used to have – during this one Christmas – my little guy and my nephew kept going by the back door and wiggling the door handle, and we caught my nephew pointing outside – as we joked that they were planning their escape.

One Christmas – I had one of my cousins make my Tiffie “Jordan” a mug that said, “There is nowhere you can go that I won’t be with you!”. I never knew heaven would be one of those places. 💔

This photo always makes me laugh!

My brother’s face is priceless!

He was watching T.V. on this Christmas day and heard my oldest kiddo and her girlfriend talking about what they were going to do when they got home (adult conversations) – and my brother overheard them.

He gave them that look above and told them, “Okay, there’s airing out your dirty laundry when you did something you shouldn’t have and I’d be all in for that gossip, and then there’s AIRING OUT DIRTY LAUNDRY NOBODY NEEDS OR WANTS TO HEAR!”. 🤣 I couldn’t stop laughing!

………………..

And every Christmas – my brother ALWAYS made sure there was a YEAR BEAR under the tree for me – no matter where we celebrated. I have a collection of them from different years that he has given me them.

Again, we don’t live close to each other anymore and we barely talk now, so he hasn’t gotten me one of those for a long time, but I miss those Christmas’s when he did. I always cherish those memories, and our gift wars.

My kids know how much I love and miss the YEAR BEARS, so yesterday – when I opened one of their three gifts to me – imagine how happy I was when I saw that they got me one.

Isn’t he cute?! I call him my *“Gingerbread man!”.* 🥰

They said that they tried to get me his wife, but she was all gone and all they had was males left. They wanted to get me the pair, but I was more than okay with him.

So, let’s talk about this Christmas.

I was up at 4 AM yesterday morning preparing the stuff needed for a dirt cake / pudding / cool whip combo my mom always made – that my kids totally miss and love. She made it every Christmas because she knew they loved and wanted it. So, it became tradition.

That woman took the recipe to the grave with her, and while I offered to try to make it like she did, the kids didn’t know if it would turn out quite like hers. It sure did! It’s delish!

I was up early making my coffee first. I then made the cake, made the pudding, and put that – and the cool whip together.

I have no idea which layer went first, but I did pudding on the bottom, cake, then Cool whip, cake, pudding, cool whip – and I just kept layering it. My mom used to put toffee bits in it, but I couldn’t find any in the last few days, so I added Chocolate chips on top. I think it turned out pretty well!

Maybe not EXACTLY like hers, but close to it.

I thawed the Turkey out, and got everything else ready, while my little guy was begging me to let him open gifts.

Let me tell you what he did on Christmas eve!!

One of my biggest joys during Christmas – is him coming into the bedroom and telling me Santa came – and he’s so excited because he wakes up and checks the living room first thing in the morning every Christmas.

On Christmas eve though – the magic was ruined because he fell asleep and I put him in his room, closed the door, and at 8 PM, I took out all of Santa’s gifts from the closet that I wrapped early that day, so I could just have a few glasses of wine and enjoy a movie after I did everything that “SANTA DOES”. Thinking he was asleep for the night, I put all of Santa’s gifts out, threw some carrots outside pretending the reindeer ate them, crumbled up the cookies “SANTA” ate, wrote a few notes from Santa and the elves, and poured myself a glass of wine.

A few minutes later – he comes out of his room, sees all of the Santa gifts under the tree, and said he couldn’t sleep.

In all fairness, I knew I should have waited until the middle of the night when I heard him snoring, but I just wanted to get it all done. SO, there was none of him coming into the room waking me up excited that Santa came – because he saw all the SANTA gifts under the tree that night. 🥺 Ah well.

He’s 9 and this Christmas has been bitter-sweet, because I don’t know if he’ll believe in the magic of the elves next year, or Santa. It’s bitter-sweet because my youngest daughter is 17, so this is her last Christmas as a kid.

Time and life are moving way too fast! My kids are growing up way too fast.

It’s sad to think that on top of all the Christmas memories I’ve had as a kid and over the years as an adult in different places – this will be just memories, too! It’s also bitter-sweet because this is probably our last Christmas in this apartment, and maybe – Minnesota – as we plan to move next summer.

Yesterday – I made Christmas breakfast. Just some pancakes and Tator tots.

We opened gifts.

The daughter got some ducks – because she collects those little things. One was a graduation duck! One was a witch because we joke that she is one 😁and she also got one with a beanie because I know how much she loves Beanies. They came with cute sunglasses she could change on them.

I got her those.

I got her a Sloth nightlight – because she loves Sloths. I got her a Sloth snow globe. I got her a Chicago hoodie, a gingerbread man tumbler, an amazon gift card, Billie Eilish perfume because she’s been bugging me about it (lol), and a bunch of other things. She also got a computer lap desk that comes with charging ports, a place for her phone, a reading light and a fan on it.

My older son just wanted some tapestry stuff and posters for his wall. His walls are covered with different posters and drawings, tapestry, etc. I got him more. He wanted some monkey phone / controller holder, so I got him that. He showed me it on Amazon weeks ago. I got him cologne (2 bottles. Different kinds). I also brought him a computer lap desk, and – he always talks about getting a motorcycle.

Many motorcycle owners believe in the “Guardian bell”. A bell they hang somewhere on the bike or their keychain like a spiritual guardian angel for the rider. I’ve read legend says that it protects from evil spirits that try to attach themselves to the motorcycle or rider, but I don’t know if that’s true or not. Either way – it’s for protection for the rider.

The rule is – you can’t buy it yourself.

It has to come from someone who truly loves you and wants you to be safe, so while I’m against him getting a motorcycle, I feel like if anyone is going to get him a guardian bell – it should be me. So, I did. It says, “Never drive faster than your guardian angels can fly”. ❤️ I got him many other things as well, and both of kids loved their gifts – just as much as my little dude loved his.

I laughed when my son told my daughter, “She got me a guardian bell. Shhhh! Let me see if I hear a motorcycle pulling into the parking lot!”. I told the kid, “Nice try!”.

Little dude got a scooter, a dart board, roller skates, new knee and elbow pads, Legos, some street hockey items, and much more.

You want to hear something funny?

I forgot I brought him a helmet already from Amazon, so when “SANTA” went shopping, she also brought him a new helmet and didn’t realize there was one under the tree already. 🤣 I need to start writing down what I purchase – to avoid double orders. I’m thinking about making him pick which one he wants to keep (the one Santa brought is much cooler and lights up), so I may just give another child the one I purchased from Amazon.

With my Year Bear – my kids also brought me some things I needed, and an “S” for my computer desk.

Christmas was great.

❤️

The rest of the day was filled with blessings, love, laughter, and good memories being made.

After gifts, we cleaned up, and my older son and I started cooking dinner around 4 PM. I poured a glass of wine and sat down to watch the game between the Detroit Lions and the Minnesota Vikings last night.

I read somewhere yesterday – that Snoop Dogg came out with a song called, “Spending Christmas in Minnesota”. I listened to it and laughed and wondered what he knew about spending Christmas in Minnesota, but then I read that he was actually in Minnesota yesterday for the game – to do the halftime show. So, I had to watch it! 😶 He did a damn good job, too! Him, Lainey Wilson, and anyone else with him.

Because – Snow.

December 9, 2025December 9, 2025 Shel R.1 Comment

I’m beginning to think God has a timer up there, and at 4 PM exactly – every day – it goes off and releases SNOW!

I swear – the last week or so, every day like clockwork, same time – it’s snowing.

Last night was no different. It started snowing as soon as I headed to Target at 4 PM.

It got bad really fast, and the drive home – 30 minutes back to my little itty-bitty town – was awful.

This is the time of year where Minnesota people get to play, “Hey, where’d the lines go?”, or “Am I on the right side of the road?” – depending on what you want to call it. ha.

Today, was a little better – since crews cleared the roads pretty quickly for the AM drivers, and I got to work with no issues.

What I didn’t know – was that more heavy and nasty snow was expected today, but this time – it started around 1 PM or so. We had a meeting at work, and after the meeting, I sat at the front desk – looking out at the snow as it started.

Around 1:20 PM, my boss sat next to me and we were chatting, as I told her my kids are getting out of school early due to the predicted snowstorm getting worse, and my older son was picking them up. She asked if I knew anything about the other schools up by my job closing early, and I told her I just knew the school in our town was letting the kids out early, but that I didn’t have to get them because my son was.

I got the email, the call, and the text for it.

She suddenly said, “Let me go make some calls”. I thought she was going to call and see if schools up that way where I work – were closing early because maybe she knew kids who go there or adults who work in those schools, but 10 minutes later, as I stood in the middle of the office – she came and stood next to me and said, “I called Jayla. She’s coming in early, so you can get out of here. I know you’ve got a long drive back and the roads are getting nasty. I want you to get home safe”. Jayla is one of my younger co-workers, and she came in for me.

I didn’t even ask my boss if I could leave early, but the fact that she thought about me driving all the way back to my little town in this weather and released me early – shows what kind of boss she is and I’m so grateful for her. 😊Another one of my co-workers took off as well, and I believe my boss did some of her work and was planning to leave early herself – since she has a pretty long drive home.

I will say that the ride home wasn’t too bad, and the plows were out doing their jobs, but the fact that I feel “snowed in” – sort of sucks. I wanted to be out and about doing Christmas shopping, and getting some errands done, but it is nice being home relaxing at the same time.

The school is starting two hours late tomorrow if nothing changes, but of course – the kids are praying it just closes.

I’m off the next few days, so I don’t have to worry about traveling.

I thought the snow was going to miss us this year or that we’d have a mild, chill winter because as of late November – we didn’t have much snow, but I guess that’s changing. 🙄

So, I plan to maybe get my little dude off his video games the next few days – for once and go use the sled I got him a while back – that he hasn’t touched. Snow angels? Yes. Snowman? Yes. I want to do it all. Heck – maybe a hot chocolate run and photos by the lake where the beautiful Christmas lights are all up and the area near the lake is all decorated. Why not?!

*****

My daughter and I were there yesterday – where we planned to take some of her Senior photos because the deadline is fast approaching and we have to get these done, and one turned in for the yearbook. We took some really cute ones, but she didn’t like them, so we have to go do them again.

I absolutely love this one:

She does, too! Unfortunately, we need a photo for the yearbook – where she’s looking up, and she didn’t like the ones we took.

It started snowing bad last night, so we just came home and decided to try again this week.

Plus, this was inside one of the decorations, and I’d like to get the outside during dusk – where we could make it a little “nicer”.

Just when I thought we were about to get these Senior photos done, Senior quote, Senior wills, etc. – turn those in and be done with everything, I got an email about the Senior class rings. Those are $400+ depending on designs, etc.

When they say Senior year is expensive – they’re not lying!!!!

******

If you want to giggle though – my daughter has liked this boy that I’ll call “Kyle” – for the longest.

She decided to take Psychology this year just for fun. Maybe not just for fun – because she plans to become an EMT / Paramedic in the future, and sometimes they deal with mental health and things Psych related, so she will probably use what she learns one day.

This boy Kyle joined Psychology recently, and she doesn’t know why because she says all he does is play around, sleep, and doesn’t pay attention.

My daughter actually likes this class, and when she found out a few days ago that this boy Kyle is now dating a girl she used to be friends with, she dropped Psychology. She felt like if this girl joined Psychology to be in class with this Kyle kid – my daughter didn’t want to deal with that.

I thought it was goofy that she was dropping a class because of a boy or some girl he was dating that may or may not join the class, but she said she was going to join the Yearbook committee instead. She gets a free yearbook if she’s on the committee, so I was all for that. One less cost I have to pay. So, I supported her decision to drop Psychology and go be on the yearbook committee if it made her happy, less stressed out over this young man and worrying about his girlfriend joining that class.

I supported her wanting to make the change of classes.

I told her do what she felt she needed to do – even if I thought letting some girl run her out of that class – was insane. The girl hadn’t even joined the class yet, nor did we know if she was going to.

Last night, my daughter was upset that she dropped that class without thinking. She said when she found out Kyle and her old friend were dating, she just felt sick, and didn’t want to see them together if this girl did join the class, but now – she could care less and she feels like she’ll miss Psychology. She said she’s not going to let Kyle or her old friend dating – run her out of a class she loves, and she’s just going to deal with it if this girl joins that class.

After her going back and forth about if she should just stay in Psychology or not – especially after her main teacher switched her to the yearbook committee when she asked the other day – I looked at her last night like:

“You need to make up your mind, kid!”.

She decided to stay in Psych, and I was so proud of her for not letting this boy she likes or the girl now dating him – keep her from a class she truly does love and enjoys learning in.

Today, she told her main teacher she’ll just stay in Psych, and I’m sure she’s driving him crazy, too! Still – he’s amazing with her and he switched her back to Psychology.

I giggled about the whole thing.

I did tell her that when she graduates – she may look back on these few years and wonder what the hell she was thinking when it comes to this kid, Kyle. I told her about some of my crushes back in high school and how I look back now and wonder the same.

People change. Feelings change, and years from now – this boy Kyle and this girl he’s dating now – may not even remember each other’s last names and they may go their own ways after graduation, so I’m truly happy my daughter didn’t let this class go – because of them.

I think it’s good for her and her future career.

Teenagers make me laugh with their little puppy love relationships.

I remember those days back in high school.

Matter of fact – one of my really good friends from high school and I – we were talking the other day about guys we had crushes on in high school, and when she heard I had a crush on this boy Anthony back in high school, she laughed at me and did the whole, “Ewwww. What was wrong with you?” (Shame game). lol. I look back now, and I laugh about it myself.

I found out she had a crush on this one guy we went to high school with, and I did the same. We totally had different taste in our guys, but we laughed about the guys we once crushed on in high school, and I hope my daughter can look back and do the same – with laughter and humor about it.

There is one really good young man at the school that I wouldn’t mind my daughter dating.

I’ll call him “Brandon”.

Brandon has really liked my daughter since she started there in 8th grade, and every time school let out, he’d be outside yelling, “BYE, KAILANI!” – so loud – that everyone heard him and looked at him. Daily. It was the cutest thing and I’d tell her, “Say bye to that boy!”. She never wanted to. 🤣

He still likes her. He still talks to her. I still wish she’d give him a chance.

A few days ago, when she was telling me about this boy she likes – dating her old good friend now, she looked up at the sky and said, “God, if you have another guy up there who is good and will treat me right, please send him my way!”. I laughed and told her, “HE DID!!! YOU KEEP FRIEND ZONING HIM!”.

(I was talking about Brandon).

She’s 17. She’s allowed to date now, as long as it’s the right kind of boy and he treats her right, but I’m also not in a hurry for her to date, and I told her to make sure that her graduation is her main focus. She’s a great kid, and she has all her credits so far, and she’s so close to finishing the last ones she needs – so, I’m not worried. Still, I want her to make dating a last priority.

In other news –

We’re almost through the holidays and Christmas will be here soon.

I’ve been finishing up Christmas shopping for the kids. I’ve been trying to figure out what I’m doing for dinner Christmas day. I’ve been trying to get cute little goody bags together for Elijah’s class and putting together gifts for his teacher. I’ve been trying to save for and plan a trip back home to Illinois for Christmas to see my aunt and uncle, and possibly one of my cousins, his wife and son – at the end of this month.

I can’t wait until Christmas is over and I can sit down with a glass or two of wine – relax and wait until New Years eve to get this year over with.

I’m counting down the days until we can pack up the moving truck, turn over the keys to the apartment we’re in now, and leave this small town.

Will we miss it? Sure. It’s been home for the last 5 years, but it’s not really “home”. Illinois is.

While we don’t want to move back to Chicago, we’ve been looking at some places at lease closer to it.

Closer to civilization, more varieties of stores and food places. Closer to friends and family we left behind when we moved to Minnesota years ago.

I’ve been looking for houses in Wisconsin – close to the Illinois border, and some houses in the suburbs of Illinois.

I think when we move, I’ll most miss the very little traffic we have here. I’ll miss the amazing people I’ve met here in Minnesota. I’ll miss going to have coffee with one of my good friends who I’ve become close to here. I’ll miss the school for sure and everyone in it.

I’ll miss the residents I have gotten close to in the facility I work in.

I’ll miss the beautiful night sky that shows the stars so brightly because there’s no tall buildings and no streetlights to stop them from shining brightly.

I’ll miss all the beautiful lakes.

I’ll miss all the good times we had in this apartment and around Minnesota.

So, yes – I’ll miss this place, but I’m also okay if I never see it again. ha.

I won’t miss how gossip spreads so fast here and how everyone is in each other’s business.

I won’t miss the lack of food spots, or stores. The dead mall where nobody goes anymore.

I won’t miss the 30-minute drives to the nearest bigger city and home, or how everything is miles or hours away.

I won’t miss struggling to not hit the deer on super dark roads with no lights at night.

I won’t miss the snow that falls in October sometimes.

I won’t miss the -30, -45-degree weather.

I won’t miss this building I live in, and all the craziness that comes with it.

I will miss the fact that this is the last place I saw my oldest child alive and well, but other than the things I will miss here – I’m ready to get the hell out of here once my youngest daughter graduates.

ESPECIALLY – for a better chance at my dream career.

I’ve been looking and I’ve found some amazing houses – but who knows if they’ll be available when I’m ready? Part of me wants to try to buy a house in early February / March, so when we’re ready to move, we have somewhere set already, but part of me can’t afford rent and a mortgage.

This economy has me walking around like:

haha.

Seriously though – part of me feels like I need to start investing in something, and part of me feels like this economy is NOT “single mama friendly”.

I trust God, and his plan and that’s all I can do.

Ah. I just felt like writing tonight, and I’m about to head to bed because it’s only 8:30, but this mama is tired.

Maybe I’ll go finish reading CAUGHT UP.

If you haven’t read that book yet, it’s great, but you have to read – (LIGHTS OUT) – first, so you can understand (CAUGHT UP) and the relationships between the characters. Both books are by the amazing author “NAVESSA ALLEN”. ❤️ I’ll write about them as soon as I finish Caught up. I’m in the middle of it, and just haven’t had the time to finish because I’m always at work, or running errands, etc.

I just found out from a friend that Navessa now has a 3rd book, “GAME ON!”. Hold on girl. Let me get through the 2nd book. 😁

I like to buy and read books off of Kindle. It’s just easier.

So, let me sign off for the night, open my phone and try to finish this book.

I love you all. Stay warm if it’s cold where you are. Be safe. Behave, and Goodnight.

❤️Shel❤️

When you can’t sleep – you do some research on trains, and other things.

November 29, 2025 Shel R.Leave a comment

So, who was dreaming about me and won’t let me sleep?

Ha.

It’s currently 2:20 AM and I’ve been awake since I went to bed at 9 – something last night.

I’ve just been in bed thinking about different things. Tossing and turning. Thinking some more. Thinking of bills due. Christmas coming up fast. My work schedule. Getting back into a workout routine, and all kinds of stuff. I’ve checked my phone about 20 times, and every time I look – it’s just another 20 minutes or so later.

My mind won’t shut the hell up, and for some crazy reason, my mind went to the train derailment of 1977 – in downtown Chicago.

(Photo taken from Medium).

My mom worked down there at the time if I remember her telling me that correctly.

She was down there when it happened.

I have no idea why I thought about this as I was in bed not able to sleep, but then I started looking up photos on it, reading the story, and remembering my mom talking about it many years ago.

If you want to read the story, check it out. 👇

https://mx-schroeder.medium.com/out-of-the-loop-the-1977-chicago-usa-train-collision-6049663a4fc6

There are more photos on the site.

😶

I don’t really tell many people because it’s not really a big deal – but I like trains. I know – weird fact about me you probably didn’t need to know, but I do. I think they’re really cool, and if I’m being honest – I especially love the freight trains that travel all around the world and have the really creative tagging / drawings on it – from people who shouldn’t be doing it – but some of their artwork is neat.

The fact that these trains go all over, and these taggers are getting their artwork noticed in many different states – is pretty amazing. Okay, okay. I’m Criminal justice. I know it’s illegal and it’s not right to tag on a train car or mark it up – but I’ve seen some hard work put into those masterpieces, and it makes me appreciate art more. I don’t mean the goofy “Let me tag my name on this train car” – garbage. I mean the awesome photos of cartoons that get drawn, or the ones that take time to make something stand out – that the entire world will see – wherever that train car is.

I always wonder if someone creates these beautiful pieces on train cars and thinks to themselves, “Many people in many cities and states will see this and love it!”.

Stuff like (below) – makes me smile and makes me wonder how the hell there’s enough time – to do stuff like this, but again – while wrong and illegal – some of it – is creative.

💕

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Just because I started thinking about the train derailment in Chicago in 1977, that got me thinking about train cars I’ve seen with all kinds of drawings and artwork on it. I’m not okay with the tagging and people just being stupid about it – but something like these photos – that go all over the world and make people giggle and smile – I’m not against it!

STILL ILLEGAL THOUGH! STILL NOT A GOOD IDEA TO DO IT!

If you get caught, there’s hefty consequences!!!!

Hell. There are so many different types of trains and different styles, I just appreciate the trains themselves – even without the tagging and beauty of different artwork on them. So, I grabbed my phone, and I was looking up different types of trains, and I came across more train derailments, and why they happen.

What I really wanted to see – was how it looks for a train conductor – driving a train, so I looked up those videos.

Another fun fact about me – is that I once wanted to be a train conductor and drives those huge things, but I know it’s not always sunshine and rainbows, and there’s a lot that goes into it.

I’m telling you! For some reason – I’ve always been fascinated with trains.

Maybe it started when I was a young kid and my friends and I would climb over a fence – to then climb up a hill and onto the train tracks down the block from where I grew up. I loved trains even then, and nothing has changed.

There was one time a police officer was driving by, saw my best friend and I – up on the tracks, and screamed at us to get down. We hopped back over the fence, and once we were back on the ground, he yelled at us – telling us the dangers of being up on the tracks, and how if it derails – we’re in trouble and can be killed up there.

Our brothers were up there, too!

Mine got caught and he had to come down, and my best friend’s brother was hiding behind a wall – laying down, so the cop couldn’t see him. We were told that if he comes back around or sees us up there again, we’d be taken to the station, and our parents would be called. He asked if anyone else was up there with us, and we lied and said no. He asked, “So, that foot I see – isn’t attached to a body?”. lol

We turned to see my best friend’s brother’s foot sticking out from behind the wall. He got in trouble, too!

And –

My best friend lived on a dead-end street, on the 3rd floor – and the train tracks were literally right outside her window, so we could see people in the train and the trains going by, and they could see us if we had our heads sticking out of her bedroom window. We used to wave, and some would wave back. Sometimes, if the train conductor saw us, he’d toot the train horn for us. 😊

So, besides bills, and Christmas – my work schedule and other things on my mind, I was searching train videos of all kinds, and the 1977 derailment in my city back then. Long before I was born. I was searching for photos of train tagging’s – and drawings on trains that people have taken photos of, and I have some myself in one of my old phones.

Still – my mind wouldn’t shut up and let me sleep.

Then, I realized I was hungry and had to get up to eat, so I checked on my little guy, and saw – (as usual) – his cat sleeping right next to him – like Simba does every night. 💕

I checked on my other two kids, and snuck to the kitchen to grab something little to eat, and here I am.

Writing for the world – that’s probably all sleeping right now. How does it feel?! haha.

I also found myself looking up reviews for different places I shop, eat, etc. I’m telling you – insomnia is real and it will have me all over the internet looking up things that make no sense at the time, but they’re interesting.

After all that, I started thinking about the people at work. From my amazing co-workers to the residents that we take care of and look out for – I adore them all.

The residents in our care – are homeless and have come to stay at our facility upon approval of whoever helps them pay for it – be it insurance, or whatever, and the case manager they work with.

They have to abide by certain rules, and if they follow those rules – they have a place to stay. If they break them – they can be kicked out. The residents in our care have mental health issues, drug and alcohol addictions, Criminal records, and many have had complicated rough lives, but I wouldn’t want to work anywhere else, because our residents are pretty awesome. 💕

As someone who works in the facility, I know that anything can happen on any given day and sometimes – our lives can be put in danger, but I also know that there’s protocol and the police are right on board with arriving quickly if any one of my co-workers or myself need them, especially if someone who isn’t allowed near the facility or on the property – shows up.

Many times – we’re not even thinking about the dangers of working in this facility when we’re there. We’re vigilant and stay alert of course, but I think the communication between all of my co-workers and myself – is beautiful and we all make sure that if we need our lead staff – we can call them and know that they’ll come handle whatever they need to.

I think the worst that has happened – is a few of them having too much to drink, and we may have to get in between them and whoever they’re arguing with, or let it be known that they don’t want to break their lease and get kicked out – so, “Cut it out!”, and many times – they do stop before anything gets too crazy.

I think it’s about building rapport (trust and mutual respect) with the residents that live there, and the staff – and getting to know all of their personalities, so if something does happen – we can step in and deal with each individual on a personal level – knowing they trust a few of us who work there.

I love it.

I love the residents, and I love going to work, and I never thought I’d say that.

I’ve been in the medical field for so long, and I used to hate going to work, but now that I’m in the field of partial Criminal justice / partial community service and dealing with criminals, homeless residents that now live in the facility, drug and alcohol addicted people – it’s such a rewarding job, and I can now honestly say – I love my job!

Just the other day, one of my most awesome residents came up to me and handed me this:

He told me he made it for me, and it’s not much – but he thought it was nice.

I absolutely love it and told him that for me – it’s the little things that matter, and that I was going to put it on display on my kitchen counter at home – and I sure did! 😊

Many of them are such sweet and kind people, but because of what they’ve been through and have done in their lives – they need to know they can trust us staff members, and I try to make sure they know they can come to me and I’m going to do whatever I can for them – just like a few of my co-workers who go above and beyond.

It’s not just a paycheck for me!

While I couldn’t sleep, all of that was running through my mind because we have some residents who probably won’t ever get better, get help, or change – and I hate that, but I respect their choices. They’ve been this way for so long, they don’t know any other lifestyle. For some residents – they’re not doing well, and they know they’re not going to be on this earth long, so they choose to live reckless and do what they want to do, and we can’t stop that.

So – where I work – we laugh, we love, we show compassion and kindness and just be there whenever these residents need us.

I thought about work as well. Not just trains, bills, Christmas and whatever else.

Listen, I’ve eaten. I’ve written. It’s 3:13 AM, and I have to be up for work at 5, so I should probably try to again to get some sleep. I know I’ll be drinking a lot of Coffee later today.

I will catch up with all of you and what’s going on in your lives later tonight.

Have a beautiful and blessed day!

💕Shel💕

Happy Thanksgiving!

November 27, 2025November 27, 2025 Shel R.21 Comments

I am finally back!

I took a break from writing for a little bit and decided to delete all of my posts here – because a few friends of mine use Blogger and absolutely love it. I checked it out and I THOUGHT I absolutely loved it, too!

Turns out there’s a lot more that goes into it – than WP, and it’s a whole headache. A lot more than it’s worth. I will say I love the way other people who are used to Blogger – set up their blogs there, but I now see that I’m more of WP gal, and I regret leaving for a while.

Don’t worry! WP gave me hell logging back in because when I finally did – I was locked out and it took me days to finally figure out how to get back in, since my password and login link weren’t working.

I tried a different site after that, but that was a mess.

I decided to maybe try “XANGA” – which is where I blogged back in high school. Did you know that’s no longer up and running? As far as I saw. Those were some good times.

With that being said – I came back to WP, and I’m so grateful I left my site up, and didn’t delete this – despite deleting the posts I had here. I shall never leave WP again. 🙄

I want to also say:

I know sometimes I don’t feel like it or think it – but I am truly blessed.

I’m grateful for still being here at 43 to watch my kids grow, and I hope the good Lord gives me many – many – more years for that.

I am grateful for all we have and for our health.

I am grateful for so many things – I would be here all day.

I am definitely grateful the kids wanted a quick and easy dinner tonight.

They didn’t want the Turkey we have every year because it takes too long to cook, and they had such a taste for tacos, so we did something different, went against tradition, and had Chicken tacos for our Thanksgiving dinner.

I still made stuffing, potatoes, and so on. We still had cornbread, and so many other things.

I made cake and we had the Pumpkin pie my younger daughter loves so much.

It was nice. It was a fast and easy clean up, we watched Home alone together and enjoyed some video games.

There weren’t many photos. We decided to leave the selfies and the phones alone. We just enjoyed time together. 💕 I think many times during the holidays; I’m so caught up in taking all these photos and making memories – that I forget to just make the memories and leave my phone alone. Today, I took some photos, but I didn’t force my kids to smile for the camera – or to get in front of the tree for Thanksgiving pictures like I do every year.

I just enjoyed my time with them and focused on the memories and those moments we had today.

As today comes to an end, I just popped open a bottle of wine, poured a glass, and struggled with getting back into this account (and did!).

The older kids are in their rooms winding down now. My little guy is on the couch watching a movie. The leftovers have been put away, and I work tomorrow – so it’s going to be early bedtime for me.

I just wanted to say hello again, and Happy Thanksgiving to all of you.

I hope yours went as smoothly as mine did!

Love you!

💕Shel💕