“Yes! I’ll come in for you tonight!”.

Those were my words to my Co-worker when she messaged me earlier. She wasn’t feeling well, and asked if I could work for her. She asked if I wanted to trade shifts or if I would just go in – depending on if I needed to stay under a certain amount of hours or not.

I need all the hours I can get right now. So, I told her I’d just take her shift and no trade was needed.

I planned to sleep for a bit.

However – it’s snowing! It seems like it never stops snowing here in Minnesota, and I’m so over it.

We live in the middle of nowhere pretty much and when it gets dark, there’s no street lights to light up your way if you’re driving. That means – when it snows – and the roads are bad – it’s a guessing game of “Am I on the right side of the road?”.

I left our house 3 hours early.

I wanted to sit down and eat dinner with my kids, but I looked outside and the roads were already covered, so I knew if I didn’t leave before it got dark, I’d play that game I hate so much during this weather.

It usually takes me 30 minutes or so – to get to work, but I drove slow, so 45 to the city I work in – was more like it.

I’m currently sitting in a parking lot of a mall writing this. Work is now only 15 minutes away, and if it keeps snowing – at least my drive won’t be so bad because I’m already in the area.

Since I have hours to go before work…let me tell you a story.

I had to laugh earlier because a friend of mine and I – were talking about the weirdest relationships we’ve ever had. 🫩😁 I don’t even know how it came up, but since I have the time and I’m just sitting here before I drive a few blocks down to work – I’ll share mine.

We started talking about her ex-boyfriend and laughed about the weird parts of the times they were together, and then I told her about one of my ex’s – that I’ll call “Aaron”.

She asked what my weirdest / craziest relationship was.

Aaron and I were childhood best friends.

We had known each other since the age of 13, and we were always so close. Back then, he considered himself a “thug”. He considered himself a “gangster”, but back then – I was young and dumb and thought that that was cool.

Ya live and learn, right! 🧐

So, Aaron and I hung out all of the time when he wasn’t with his friends, and when he was doing illegal stuff – he always told me not to come by, or to go home and he’d call me later.

It seemed like he cared about me enough to look out for me, and I loved him for that – as my male best friend. Anytime we were together, he made me laugh a lot and he was always making sure those around us whenever we hung out – respected me.

Aaron made it clear he’d never let anything happen to me.

Still, Aaron was who he was, and I knew it was probably not the best idea to hang out with him as much as I did – because of who he was hanging out with and what he was doing in his life. How do you stop hanging out with someone you have so much fun with though? Someone who supports you and your dreams in life? Who wants the best for you and makes you forget everything when you’re with them?

Again, this guy was my male best friend and we grew up together. However… when I was 18, I had my first child and got married.

Aaron had tried to be with me (in a relationship) all of our teenage years, and I just didn’t see him “in that way”. I wasn’t attracted to Aaron, but I still loved him as one of my close best friends.

He was a really good guy with a big heart for me, but after I had my oldest child and got married, we lost contact. Aaron was upset about me finding someone to spend my life with, and having a kid with someone else – when he wanted it to be (us) all those years.

He used to joke about us getting married and having kids some day, but I finally realized it wasn’t a joke. He was serious and I knew he liked me when we were teenagers, but I didn’t know how serious it was until I got married, had a kid and he stopped talking to me.

Years and years went by, and we didn’t speak.

In 2013, my now ex husband and I – divorced.

I don’t blame either of us. I think we were married young, had kids young, and now that we grew older – we just wanted different things in life and we parted ways as friends.

I posted something on Facebook about the divorce and wishing my ex husband well in life, praying that we both find our happiness, and suddenly – I received a message from Aaron. How long has he been watching my posts or did someone in our friend group tell him I was divorced now? …… Those were my questions. We had a few of the same friends, still.

I was happy to hear from him, and we talked a lot after that first message. We could spend hours on the phone – laughing and talking like no time had passed at all – when in reality – we had years of catching up to do.

He told me about the relationships he’s been in, about his job, the kids he has now, and what he’s been doing in life. I told him the same about me. My divorce. My job. My dreams and goals. My kids, and many other things that we talked about.

He admitted he was upset when I got married and had a kid, but said he never lost feelings for me. He said I didn’t know it – but he checked on me often through friends, or looking at my Social media. It made me smile, but my feelings hadn’t changed and I still didn’t feel the same way he did, so I felt bad.

Still, it was nice having my male best friend back in my life.

He asked if I wanted to meet up and go see a movie and he promised it would be as friends. So, I went.

We went to see a movie, went to get ice cream and just sat in a park and talked for hours. As the days and weeks went by, we hung out more and more and this time – we were adults.

We were both in our early 30’s.

Eventually, we hung out so much, that I decided to try to date Aaron. I thought that my feelings for him could grow – even if they weren’t there romantically at that time. We became a couple and I did my best to give him a fair chance.

We had a lot of good times for the 6 months we were together, and yes – that’s all it was.

One of the few times I still cherish – is when we were at his cousin’s house. We had just gotten there, it was the middle of winter and I had my leather jacket on. When I took it off – I had a tight fuzzy white sweater under it, and black tight pants. He looked me up and down and just said, “Damn! Wow! Damn. That’s all mine!”. ❤️

When his cousin said something about stealing me and not giving me back, Aaron made me laugh when he got back up and said we were leaving, and to put my jacket back on.  (Yes, he was joking!). We had a great time that night and it was one of my favorite memories as we hung out with his cousin and his cousin’s girlfriend – who showed up a few hours later.

Another time I still cherish – is when he lost a close friend of his that he’s known as long as he’s known me. That loss really broke him and he was at his sister’s house for a week – and wouldn’t leave because he was just so depressed and needed someone to be around him – so he wouldn’t think about this friend he lost that much.

His sister was the one who called me and told me I needed to come see her brother because he was in this deep depression and needed something to pick him up. I told her I’d be there, but she didn’t tell him.  As soon as I walked down the stairs to the basement where he was hanging out, his eyes lit up, he smiled so big and he gave me the biggest hug.

Aaron and I – were always there for each other when we needed it the most. As best friends and as a couple when we were together.

Although we had a lot of good times and funny laughs, I slowly noticed that Aaron was still the same guy he was – when we were teenagers, and that life didn’t appeal to me anymore. What I once thought was cool and fun – (his lifestyle and the way he considered himself a thug or gangster) – wasn’t cool or fun anymore.

Being adults now – I thought he changed. I thought his mentality changed, and that he had dreams and goals like I did, but he didn’t.

He was working a part-time job with very little education, and I tried so hard to get him to get a full-time job and do something with his future. To plan something better for himself – rather than still being 30-something and calling himself a thug / gangster.

We weren’t teens anymore and it was no longer cute or acceptable. When I started to realize he still had the same mentality – it was when he kept talking about having enemies and “being from the hood” or “being hood”. A few months into the relationship, I realized this probably wasn’t going to last, and that even though he had met my kids already because he was my childhood male best friend and I trusted him – I knew after I heard him talk about still enjoying that lifestyle – I couldn’t bring my kids around him anymore.

I knew I didn’t want to be involved in that lifestyle and I also knew that I had goals and dreams and he wasn’t even thinking about his future or making it better.

He was happy working his part-time job and being in the streets doing whatever he was doing when he wasn’t at work, or with me.

I wanted to go to college for Criminal justice and make something of my life, and we were totally different and had totally different mentalities when it came to things like that.

Other things started to bother me as well.

He was obsessed with the Illuminati, and who was in it. He used to talk about the Illuminati non-stop and that’s just something I never cared about, but I listened when he talked about it – because he was interested in it and I’m sure that half the things I was into or talked about – he listened because it was me and he just enjoyed hearing me out.

However, every single conversation we had – that had absolutely nothing to do about the Illuminati – ended up leading to a conversation about the Illuminati or the government somehow. Someway. He was also obsessed with the government and watching what they were doing or telling me what he thought they were trying to do.

I found that a little weird or wild.

I had once told him I just tried a new Deli that day for lunch and the sandwiches there were amazing. I told him we’d have to go one day, and he told me I had to be careful with new foods I try because the government puts things in certain foods to kill off half of the population – since earth is getting too crowded.

I looked at him that night like:

“What the hell are you talking about?”

I remember asking him if we can ever just have a normal conversation that doesn’t lead to anything about the Illuminati or government and what he thinks they’re doing to food, or to our minds, etc.

That turned into an argument because he felt like I didn’t believe him about what was going on in the world. 👀🙄

Things got really weird with him, and then he started getting super jealous over every little thing.

Sometimes, I’d go to his place and wait for him to get off work. I had a key to his place, but there were times the weather was super nice and I’d sit outside with the owner of the building he lived in, and some of the other females who lived in the building – that I had gotten to know.

Aaron would come home, see me outside and accuse me of wanting their boyfriends or husbands to see me, or other guys passing by – to see me and talk to me, but whenever he came home – I’d only ever be talking to the women I knew there.

I remember one time when Aaron made a comment about me being outside and one of the older women told him, “Leave that baby alone! All she does is sit here, talk to us, and wait for you or she’s inside cooking for you – for when you get home! That baby ain’t over here talking to nobody’s boyfriend, husband or any other man. Stop accusing her of all that nonsense!”.

One day, he told me I shouldn’t be outside – unless it’s with him. I just laughed and told him if he wanted to control something – buy a puppy because he wasn’t controlling me.

That led to an argument.

I had never seen or experienced Aaron act that way – in all the many years I knew him, so it was all weird to me.

You know that song by Justin Bieber that goes, “My mama don’t like you, and she likes everyone?”.

I brought him home to meet my parents one time and my dad just looked at me and shook his head. My mom was disappointed and while she was very polite to him, I knew she didn’t like him, and she did like everyone. My mom was the sweetest woman, and you had to do something really bad – for her not to like you, so when I knew she didn’t like Aaron the first time she met him, I also couldn’t question why.

She could tell just by looking at him – what he was into and the lifestyle he led.

We had a fight that night as well because he wanted to wear a hoodie, a bandana hanging out of his back pocket, baggy pants and a hat to meet my parents and when I asked him to change – he accused me of not loving him for who he is.

Eventually, I knew I had to tell Aaron it wasn’t going to work out. The feelings I thought would grow for him – weren’t. I wasn’t interested in his lifestyle or that mentality he still had in his 30’s – that was the same as when we were teens. He had no motivation or plans for his life, and our conversations were more about his fears, thoughts and opinions on the Illuminati and government – even when I tried to bring up other subjects.

Again, I think the biggest deal breaker – was knowing I didn’t feel comfortable bringing my kids around him an

One day – after 6 months together – he asked me to change my relationship status on Facebook – from “In a relationship” – to “Engaged”. I told him I wasn’t going to do that because we weren’t engaged, and people were going to want to see a ring or want to know how he proposed.

That was yet – another argument.

He accused me of not wanting other guys to think we were serious.

We ended up going to see a movie that night after our argument and I told him we had to talk when we got back to his place later. He just wanted to go enjoy a movie and avoid talking for that moment, so we went.

We ended up walking around the mall because the movie theater was upstairs and we had an hour to kill after we got our tickets.

As we were headed back upstairs an hour later, he pulled me into a “Kay’s” jewelry store.

🎵 Every kiss begins with Kay 🎵

Yep. That one. lol

He said there were always previews before a movie starts, so he wanted to just have fun. He asked me, “If you had to pick out an engagement ring today, which one would you want?”. I was confused, but I also knew that I wanted to get married again someday – (just not to him). So, I decided to play his little game and just have fun and try on engagement rings.

He had a part-time job and he was paying his rent and bills, so I figured there was no way he could even afford an engagement ring, which made me feel confident that he just had the thought of proposing in his head and I’d talk to him later about just being friends.

I tried on a few different rings and finally held my hand out when I found the perfect one that shined so pretty when I held it up. I love the square kind, and I found the one I’d love – if – I was IN LOVE and wanted to get married, but I wasn’t in love. So, I told Aaron that would be the one I want – if I had to pick, and I handed the ring back to the jewelry guy – thanking him for letting me try on a few.

I then told Aaron we had to head upstairs to the movie before we missed the beginning, and I started to walk out of the jewelry store.

When I heard him say, “We’ll take it!”, my heart dropped. I asked what he was doing. I asked where he got the money. He didn’t answer me. I told him not to do this, and he did. He paid the thousands in cash, and I didn’t even want to know how he was able to drop that much all at one time.

He didn’t even get down on one knee or propose in any romantic way. He slid it on my finger and told me, “There! Now we’re engaged and you can change your Facebook status”.

I didn’t make a big fuss about that moment at that time because I didn’t want to argue with him in a mall full of people, but as soon as we got back to his place…. we got into an argument because he called me ungrateful, disrespectful and mean.

I didn’t seem happy about the ring – he said.

I made him look stupid in front of the jewelry guy because I didn’t get all excited and at least give him a hug – he said. 

He felt like I didn’t even want the ring, and truth be told – I didn’t. I told him to keep the receipt in case something happens (when we were still at the store).

So, at his place – I already knew I was ending things, and I asked him to sit down, so we could talk. He had been drinking that night and I explained to him how much I love him and care about him as one of my best male friends all these years. How much I’ve appreciated all the times he made me laugh, was there for me or looked out for me and he knew I had done the same for him – for years.

But….I told him our lives are on two totally different paths, and that it wasn’t going to work out for us. I said I would love to continue to be friends and I don’t regret trying to be more, but that there were so many fights over stupid things, and my goals and his didn’t match up.

I tried my hardest to let him know I’d always be there for him as a friend and I didn’t want our friendship to be over, but that I totally understand if he didn’t want to be friends anymore.

He asked if it was because he believes in the extraterrestrial and the government – poisoning us.

See how weird things got???

Still, I cared very much about Aaron, and maybe he could find a woman more like him.

That night, he asked for the ring back because he said I clearly didn’t care about it. I handed it back to him, and before I could stop him – he threw it down the toilet and flushed it. He told me that’s what I think about his gift.

The next morning – I went to go get some of my things that I left at his place and told him I’d be back in a week for the rest. He asked me where the ring was and he didn’t believe me when I told him he flushed it the night before – because he was drinking and didn’t remember the night before.

A few weeks earlier – I had saved a good amount of money from work and went shopping for new clothes and shoes for myself. I had everything packed into a bag and was ready to pick it up the following week, but the following week – Aaron kept making excuses for why I couldn’t come by and get it.

Turns out – he threw all my new clothes and shoes away, and he didn’t want to admit it. He felt bad. He said he was angry about the ring, so he wanted to feel like my money was wasted as well.

We didn’t talk for an entire two years after that, but I was surprised one day when he contacted me on Facebook, apologized for everything, understood why I ended things with him, and offered to pay me for the shoes and clothes he threw out that I purchased myself.

I felt bad about the ring incident, so I told him I didn’t want anything from him – that I was sorry if he felt like I wasted his time in any way, and that I will forever remember him as one of my best friends.

And …..that was that.

I never spoke to him again.

I still laugh when I say he’s one of the weirdest relationships I ever had, but I smile when I think about the friendship we had at one point – as well.

Wherever Aaron is today – I just hope he’s doing well, he’s happy and life is kind to him. 💚

SO, when this friend of mine today – told me about her weirdest / craziest relationship and I told her about Aaron – we had a good giggle, but we also both said we hope our previous boyfriends are doing okay.

   I wish for nothing but the best for them.

Also, I just hope Aaron realized he’s worth so much more than what he was doing with himself in life. I have met some of the sweetest gangsters and thugs – but it’s a scary life and sometimes – you should want more for yourself.

As for his addiction to the aliens, the government and Illuminati – I pray he finds a woman who loves the same theories, stories, research, etc. 😁

I’m sorry (but also not sorry) that I couldn’t be that one for him.

    Anyway……

With another hour to go before I have to head towards work – I’m going to sit here and watch Tiktoks.

My loves – pray I stay awake all night because I’m going to be so tired, and I have to rush home in the morning to get the kids to school, go home and shower and then meet up with my boss at 11 AM for a meeting. 😴

      Xoxo.

      ❤️Shel❤️