Tag: work

Best compliments ever received (WP writing prompt), almost promoted, and funnies at work.

Best compliments ever received (WP writing prompt), almost promoted, and funnies at work.

Shel R.5 Comments
Daily writing prompt
What was the best compliment you’ve received?
View all responses

Answering today’s WP writing prompt, let me say that I giggled a bit when I read this question.

When I was much younger, blonde and a little thinner – I was in line one day at a Jewel – Osco in Chicago.

Damn, I miss those stores!

I was waiting in line for the girl to ring up all of my items and I was about to pay, when I turned to look behind me and some guy was looking at me. I felt weird, but I looked back again and he was still looking. I smiled politely, and I tried not to look at him a 3rd time.

One of the items I had – was on sale, so the cashier asked if I could give her just a second to run and see if she could find a sale code – to put it in the register for me. I thanked her and told her I’d wait. As I did, the guy behind me who kept looking at me – finally broke his silence.

He says, “Excuse me! Please forgive me for this, but has anyone ever told you that you look just like Shakira?”.

I smiled – because that’s one hell of an amazing compliment, and I told him No. Nobody has ever told me that, but I also thanked him for that.

It made me feel good.

He says, “So, stupid question. You’re not her, then? I was about to ask for a photo and an autograph”. He nervously laughed. I laughed with him and told him I could still be famous one day, but not that day. He told me how pretty I was, and I thanked him again and carried on with my day – smiling the whole way through it. 😁

For the record – I have never thought I looked like Shakira, but it was nice to hear.

She’s crazy beautiful, and I’m – cute, I guess. lol.

I will also say that was a long time ago, and – did I mention that I was much younger? I did. Okay.

Nobody would or could say that to me now. haha.

Shakira – in case you have no clue who she is.

And below – is me – way back in my younger, skinnier, blondie years.

I’ve also been told back then – that I looked like Amanda Bynes.

The way she looked back then – not now.

(Photo taken from Newsweek).

I never thought I looked like her, either, but again – it was nice to hear.

That poor Amanda these days, my heart breaks for her. She was gorgeous back then.

I think that hearing people thought I looked like both of them back in my younger days – was the biggest and best compliments I’ve ever received.

Another me (young, blonde and skinnier) photo – below:

And another….

(By the way, K.C.) – was an old nickname.

In Hawaii – my name is Kila. Pronounced – (Kee-La). C is for my middle name. So, some used to call me K.C.

Do I see any resemblance?

No – but it’s still the best compliments I’ve ever received. 💕

I miss my blonde hair. I miss being as skinny as I once was. I miss being young, dammit!

Anyway, I’m blessed to be here still for 43 – and this year – 44.

Every day the good Lord gives me – is a blessing.

That being said –

I worked my first overnight shift last night at the facility I work in.

It actually wasn’t bad.

During the night – different people would come out of their rooms for different things, or just to come down and chat, but I had no major issues and everyone behaved.

I came home so tired this morning, got my kids ready for school, took them, came back and showered – got ready for another day, and went right back to work.

One of our lead staff was demoted, so I asked my boss if I could take over her position and get promoted. My boss seemed so happy I asked and said she thinks I’d be a wonderful person to take over and that I’d be good for the job.

It comes with higher pay, benefits, more vacation days and other perks, but the only downside – is that my phone would be blowing up. I’d be a supervisor, so I’d be the one my co-workers would then call or send texts to if there’s trouble, if they need help or advice, if they can’t come in and I have to cover their shifts, if there’s any time off requests needed, time adjustments, and so on.

It’s a lot of responsibilities and while I don’t mind – the deal breaker – was me having to work 80 hours per paycheck mandatory – still do my weekends as I’m always on now, and then – BE ON CALL 24/7.

I would basically have no life. No time for myself or my kids. No time to do anything fun because I’d always be at work, dealing with things at work, covering shifts, or just handling calls and texts all day. If there’s an emergency where cops or medics have to come in, I’m dealing with that or going to the job site – no matter what time it is – to figure things out.

I’d be in charge of interviewing and hiring as well. I’d be in charge of deciding who needs to be fired.

I don’t want that hanging over my head.

I was so excited to go meet with my boss today and talk about taking the position – as we sat in the office that would be mine. That’s another thing that I loved. I’d get my own office and can decorate it however I want to.

Still – the thought of working SEVEN days a week and then being on call 24/7 on top of that – isn’t appealing to me. So, there are absolutely some downsides to the position as well.

I could give up my weekends if I wanted to and just do the 5 days a week, but then it also clashes with my kid’s school schedules – not to mention we’re probably moving soon if all goes well as I said before, so I’d feel bad taking the job, and leaving my boss high and dry to find someone totally new and train them in – once I leave.

So, as much as I was excited for a higher position, more pay and benefits, etc. I decided to pass on it.

My boss told me to take some paperwork home, read it over and think about it, but she was honest with me and told me if I didn’t jump on it and take it today, she’d have to keep interviewing for it, and I told her I totally understood. I let her know my concerns with the position, and that if I didn’t take it, I’d still be there for my shifts that I have now, I’d still do my job correctly, and I trust her to hire the best person for the job – who may be okay with all that extra stuff it comes with.

I may be stupid for passing it up because it’s a great opportunity but being a mother as well – I just don’t want to spend my life at work all the time. I enjoy spending time at home and with my kids as well. So, I feel like this position is something for those who have that time to be at work and be on call and go in whenever they are needed.

I am so grateful she thought of me, and that she thought so highly of me to want to give me this position.

She made me smile today when she told me that she watches me with everyone there and that even when I’ve had a bad day, or people are out of control and drunk there – acting stupid – she sees me smiling, joking with them, and handling every situation with love, compassion and grace and that’s what she’s looking for in a Supervisor. 💕

Hell, I’ve written about that lady “Daisy” that I’ve gotten so close to there.

The one who wreaks havoc and gives the place hell when she’s drunk – and how many problems we’ve all had with her. Well, this past week – one of our other lead staff walked up to me and tells me, “You’ve got a – way with Daisy”. She meant that I seem to be able to handle her little bad attitudes and her drunk rampages, and wild behavior, and that I can calm her down, or get her to listen to me.

I smiled and told this other lead staff that there are many times I can easily handle Daisy because I take no shit – and she’s not going to walk all over me when I’m there. I told her that there are many times when yes – Daisy will calm down and listen to me, but I’ve had my fair share of Daisy telling me to get the f*** out of her face, or her telling me to leave her the f*** alone, so it just depends.

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again.

With the clients we work with that live in the facility – it’s all about gaining their trust, getting to know what works with each person individually and what doesn’t – especially if they’re on something or drunk, and knowing how to handle them. I’ve learned their personalities, and I match their personalities with my own – depending on the situations and that’s how I stay calm and handle things.

I would have loved that Supervisor position, and I also think I would have been great at it.

My co-workers would have known that they could message me or come to me for anything, and I’m always going to have their backs, but again – it’s just the schedule and the times – being on call all the time – and the fact that I would feel like I’m living at work – instead of putting time into my family – that made me decide the Supervisor position isn’t for me.

Decisions suck, and it’s hard when you really want something, but it doesn’t align with everything else you have going on in life, and family time.

I’ll still be at the same job, and if we move – it may only be for another month or so, but at least I know that my boss saw so many amazing things in me – that she tried to get me to take the Supervisor position, and I hope a future boss sees it as well.

If you want to laugh a bit with me – My little-itty-bitty – trouble-making Daisy – went to jail.

I’m not laughing that she’s in there. I miss her causing trouble around the place and it’s been boring since she’s been out of the building, but what did make me laugh – is that Monday when I worked – she was drunk and running her mouth to everyone, including my boss.

My boss gave her a lot of fair warnings to be quiet, be good and go back to her room, and she refused.

My boss threatened to call the cops for her disturbances, and Daisy still wouldn’t keep her mouth shut.

At one point, my boss walked away, and I begged Daisy to just go back to her room because my boss was really about to call the cops. My boss heard her yell, “I don’t give a f***! Call the cops. I don’t have any f***in’ warrants!”.

My boss sure the hell did call the cops, and I thought she was pretending at first when I sat next to her and she was talking to “the cops”, but when she got up and walked away – telling me to let her know when they were there, I realized she was so serious.

Daisy made me laugh when she saw the cops and all of a sudden – wanted to go back to her room.

They ended up coming in and trying to talk to her, but she got mouthy with them as well, and they weren’t having it. They already know her, so when the two of them stood on each side of her and grabbed her arms, they told her she’s under arrest and has warrants…..

I stood there wondering……………

DAISY!!!!!!! WHAT THE HELL?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was going to go visit her today, but you have to be on her approved list, and I can’t even get ahold of her to tell her to add me, but maybe tomorrow – I’ll see if I can figure it out.

My overnight shift last night was quiet, especially without Daisy there drunk – and I was up all night with different people coming out of their rooms to keep me busy or keep me company.

As soon as I got there, one of the young ladies asked me for a pregnancy test.

I can say a lot, but that’s not my place, and I just prayed she wasn’t pregnant because while I don’t judge anyone since none of us are perfect – she is not on the right path to have a baby. So, I handed her the test and told her to let me know, because if she was pregnant – I was still going to support her, do whatever I could for her and the baby, and just be someone she could come to if she needed someone to be there.

When she came downstairs at 5 AM this morning with her boyfriend – who also lives there – she held up the test and told me it was negative.

I asked if she was happy with that, and she said yes. So, I let her know I was happy as well.

I told her boyfriend to walk over to the FREE CONDOMS box we have at one of the desks – and grab a couple. I told him to start making it a habit to grab free condoms anytime he’s down there.

When he walked over to the tissue box and grabbed tissues, his girlfriend laughed so hard and asked what he planned to do with those. I joked and told him, “Hey! That works, too! No sex is one way to prevent pregnancy. Do you instead!”. I had them both laughing so much, and he thought for some reason – I told him to grab tissue.

THE TWO DON’T EVEN SOUNDS THE SAME.

CONDOMS. TISSUE. What?!!!!!!!

He stood there looking confused, and his girlfriend and I – couldn’t stop laughing.

I asked her if she was sure this is who she would want as her son or daughters’ father, and she laughed even harder. I went as far as to ask her boyfriend what “2 + 2” is, and when he stood there thinking about it – I was done. I lost it and laughed.

I volunteered to allow him to take the entire box of condoms upstairs. 🤣

This is why I love my job though.

I know I can be tough and firm when fights break out, or someone is beyond drunk and acting goofy, but I also know that I can be myself, joke around and have some good laughs with the people who live there.

Coffee was also my best friend last night – because I haven’t worked any overnight shifts – since I worked in the assisted living down the block a few years ago.

I came home after meeting with my boss – and I knocked out for a few hours.

I laugh because last night at 2 AM, I looked at the clock and realized if I were back in my 20’s – backyard parties would still be going, and I’d be hanging with many friends dancing, laughing, having a great time and now by 10 PM – I’m in bed, reading a book, writing (this is proof) – lol – or listening to music to try to fall asleep.

Still – like I said – I’m grateful for every day and every new year God allows me to see! 🤗

11 PM right now, and I’m going to bed.

I told you!

I shall catch up with all of you tomorrow morning.

Sending so much love and big hugs your way!

💕Shel💕

My first overnight shift at the facility and my weirdest / craziest relationship story.

My first overnight shift at the facility and my weirdest / craziest relationship story.

Shel R.Leave a comment

     “Yes! I’ll come in for you tonight!”.

Those were my words to my Co-worker when she messaged me earlier. She wasn’t feeling well, and asked if I could work for her. She asked if I wanted to trade shifts or if I would just go in – depending on if I needed to stay under a certain amount of hours or not.

I need all the hours I can get right now. So, I told her I’d just take her shift and no trade was needed.

I planned to sleep for a bit.

However – it’s snowing! It seems like it never stops snowing here in Minnesota, and I’m so over it.

We live in the middle of nowhere pretty much and when it gets dark, there’s no street lights to light up your way if you’re driving. That means – when it snows – and the roads are bad – it’s a guessing game of “Am I on the right side of the road?”.

I left our house 3 hours early.

I wanted to sit down and eat dinner with my kids, but I looked outside and the roads were already covered, so I knew if I didn’t leave before it got dark, I’d play that game I hate so much during this weather.

It usually takes me 30 minutes or so – to get to work, but I drove slow, so 45 to the city I work in – was more like it.

I’m currently sitting in a parking lot of a mall writing this. Work is now only 15 minutes away, and if it keeps snowing – at least my drive won’t be so bad because I’m already in the area.

Since I have hours to go before work…let me tell you a story.

I had to laugh earlier because a friend of mine and I – were talking about the weirdest relationships we’ve ever had. 🫩😁 I don’t even know how it came up, but since I have the time and I’m just sitting here before I drive a few blocks down to work – I’ll share mine.

We started talking about her ex-boyfriend and laughed about the weird parts of the times they were together, and then I told her about one of my ex’s – that I’ll call “Aaron”.

She asked what my weirdest / craziest relationship was.

Aaron and I were childhood best friends.

We had known each other since the age of 13, and we were always so close. Back then, he considered himself a “thug”. He considered himself a “gangster”, but back then – I was young and dumb and thought that that was cool.

Ya live and learn, right! 🧐

So, Aaron and I hung out all of the time when he wasn’t with his friends, and when he was doing illegal stuff – he always told me not to come by, or to go home and he’d call me later.

It seemed like he cared about me enough to look out for me, and I loved him for that – as my male best friend. Anytime we were together, he made me laugh a lot and he was always making sure those around us whenever we hung out – respected me.

Aaron made it clear he’d never let anything happen to me.

Still, Aaron was who he was, and I knew it was probably not the best idea to hang out with him as much as I did – because of who he was hanging out with and what he was doing in his life. How do you stop hanging out with someone you have so much fun with though? Someone who supports you and your dreams in life? Who wants the best for you and makes you forget everything when you’re with them?

Again, this guy was my male best friend and we grew up together. However… when I was 18, I had my first child and got married.

Aaron had tried to be with me (in a relationship) all of our teenage years, and I just didn’t see him “in that way”. I wasn’t attracted to Aaron, but I still loved him as one of my close best friends.

He was a really good guy with a big heart for me, but after I had my oldest child and got married, we lost contact. Aaron was upset about me finding someone to spend my life with, and having a kid with someone else – when he wanted it to be (us) all those years.

He used to joke about us getting married and having kids some day, but I finally realized it wasn’t a joke. He was serious and I knew he liked me when we were teenagers, but I didn’t know how serious it was until I got married, had a kid and he stopped talking to me.

Years and years went by, and we didn’t speak.

In 2013, my now ex husband and I – divorced.

I don’t blame either of us. I think we were married young, had kids young, and now that we grew older – we just wanted different things in life and we parted ways as friends.

I posted something on Facebook about the divorce and wishing my ex husband well in life, praying that we both find our happiness, and suddenly – I received a message from Aaron. How long has he been watching my posts or did someone in our friend group tell him I was divorced now? …… Those were my questions. We had a few of the same friends, still.

I was happy to hear from him, and we talked a lot after that first message. We could spend hours on the phone – laughing and talking like no time had passed at all – when in reality – we had years of catching up to do.

He told me about the relationships he’s been in, about his job, the kids he has now, and what he’s been doing in life. I told him the same about me. My divorce. My job. My dreams and goals. My kids, and many other things that we talked about.

He admitted he was upset when I got married and had a kid, but said he never lost feelings for me. He said I didn’t know it – but he checked on me often through friends, or looking at my Social media. It made me smile, but my feelings hadn’t changed and I still didn’t feel the same way he did, so I felt bad.

Still, it was nice having my male best friend back in my life.

He asked if I wanted to meet up and go see a movie and he promised it would be as friends. So, I went.

We went to see a movie, went to get ice cream and just sat in a park and talked for hours. As the days and weeks went by, we hung out more and more and this time – we were adults.

We were both in our early 30’s.

Eventually, we hung out so much, that I decided to try to date Aaron. I thought that my feelings for him could grow – even if they weren’t there romantically at that time. We became a couple and I did my best to give him a fair chance.

We had a lot of good times for the 6 months we were together, and yes – that’s all it was.

One of the few times I still cherish – is when we were at his cousin’s house. We had just gotten there, it was the middle of winter and I had my leather jacket on. When I took it off – I had a tight fuzzy white sweater under it, and black tight pants. He looked me up and down and just said, “Damn! Wow! Damn. That’s all mine!”. ❤️

When his cousin said something about stealing me and not giving me back, Aaron made me laugh when he got back up and said we were leaving, and to put my jacket back on.  (Yes, he was joking!). We had a great time that night and it was one of my favorite memories as we hung out with his cousin and his cousin’s girlfriend – who showed up a few hours later.

Another time I still cherish – is when he lost a close friend of his that he’s known as long as he’s known me. That loss really broke him and he was at his sister’s house for a week – and wouldn’t leave because he was just so depressed and needed someone to be around him – so he wouldn’t think about this friend he lost that much.

His sister was the one who called me and told me I needed to come see her brother because he was in this deep depression and needed something to pick him up. I told her I’d be there, but she didn’t tell him.  As soon as I walked down the stairs to the basement where he was hanging out, his eyes lit up, he smiled so big and he gave me the biggest hug.

Aaron and I – were always there for each other when we needed it the most. As best friends and as a couple when we were together.

Although we had a lot of good times and funny laughs, I slowly noticed that Aaron was still the same guy he was – when we were teenagers, and that life didn’t appeal to me anymore. What I once thought was cool and fun – (his lifestyle and the way he considered himself a thug or gangster) – wasn’t cool or fun anymore.

Being adults now – I thought he changed. I thought his mentality changed, and that he had dreams and goals like I did, but he didn’t.

He was working a part-time job with very little education, and I tried so hard to get him to get a full-time job and do something with his future. To plan something better for himself – rather than still being 30-something and calling himself a thug / gangster.

We weren’t teens anymore and it was no longer cute or acceptable. When I started to realize he still had the same mentality – it was when he kept talking about having enemies and “being from the hood” or “being hood”. A few months into the relationship, I realized this probably wasn’t going to last, and that even though he had met my kids already because he was my childhood male best friend and I trusted him – I knew after I heard him talk about still enjoying that lifestyle – I couldn’t bring my kids around him anymore.

I knew I didn’t want to be involved in that lifestyle and I also knew that I had goals and dreams and he wasn’t even thinking about his future or making it better.

He was happy working his part-time job and being in the streets doing whatever he was doing when he wasn’t at work, or with me.

I wanted to go to college for Criminal justice and make something of my life, and we were totally different and had totally different mentalities when it came to things like that.

Other things started to bother me as well.

He was obsessed with the Illuminati, and who was in it. He used to talk about the Illuminati non-stop and that’s just something I never cared about, but I listened when he talked about it – because he was interested in it and I’m sure that half the things I was into or talked about – he listened because it was me and he just enjoyed hearing me out.

However, every single conversation we had – that had absolutely nothing to do about the Illuminati – ended up leading to a conversation about the Illuminati or the government somehow. Someway. He was also obsessed with the government and watching what they were doing or telling me what he thought they were trying to do.

I found that a little weird or wild.

I had once told him I just tried a new Deli that day for lunch and the sandwiches there were amazing. I told him we’d have to go one day, and he told me I had to be careful with new foods I try because the government puts things in certain foods to kill off half of the population – since earth is getting too crowded.

I looked at him that night like:

WHAT?????

“What the hell are you talking about?”

I remember asking him if we can ever just have a normal conversation that doesn’t lead to anything about the Illuminati or government and what he thinks they’re doing to food, or to our minds, etc.

That turned into an argument because he felt like I didn’t believe him about what was going on in the world. 👀🙄

Things got really weird with him, and then he started getting super jealous over every little thing.

Sometimes, I’d go to his place and wait for him to get off work. I had a key to his place, but there were times the weather was super nice and I’d sit outside with the owner of the building he lived in, and some of the other females who lived in the building – that I had gotten to know.

Aaron would come home, see me outside and accuse me of wanting their boyfriends or husbands to see me, or other guys passing by – to see me and talk to me, but whenever he came home – I’d only ever be talking to the women I knew there.

I remember one time when Aaron made a comment about me being outside and one of the older women told him, “Leave that baby alone! All she does is sit here, talk to us, and wait for you or she’s inside cooking for you – for when you get home! That baby ain’t over here talking to nobody’s boyfriend, husband or any other man. Stop accusing her of all that nonsense!”.

One day, he told me I shouldn’t be outside – unless it’s with him. I just laughed and told him if he wanted to control something – buy a puppy because he wasn’t controlling me.

That led to an argument.

I had never seen or experienced Aaron act that way – in all the many years I knew him, so it was all weird to me.

You know that song by Justin Bieber that goes, “My mama don’t like you, and she likes everyone?”.

I brought him home to meet my parents one time and my dad just looked at me and shook his head. My mom was disappointed and while she was very polite to him, I knew she didn’t like him, and she did like everyone. My mom was the sweetest woman, and you had to do something really bad – for her not to like you, so when I knew she didn’t like Aaron the first time she met him, I also couldn’t question why.

She could tell just by looking at him – what he was into and the lifestyle he led.

We had a fight that night as well because he wanted to wear a hoodie, a bandana hanging out of his back pocket, baggy pants and a hat to meet my parents and when I asked him to change – he accused me of not loving him for who he is.

Eventually, I knew I had to tell Aaron it wasn’t going to work out. The feelings I thought would grow for him – weren’t. I wasn’t interested in his lifestyle or that mentality he still had in his 30’s – that was the same as when we were teens. He had no motivation or plans for his life, and our conversations were more about his fears, thoughts and opinions on the Illuminati and government – even when I tried to bring up other subjects.

Again, I think the biggest deal breaker – was knowing I didn’t feel comfortable bringing my kids around him an

One day – after 6 months together – he asked me to change my relationship status on Facebook – from “In a relationship” – to “Engaged”. I told him I wasn’t going to do that because we weren’t engaged, and people were going to want to see a ring or want to know how he proposed.

That was yet – another argument.

He accused me of not wanting other guys to think we were serious.

We ended up going to see a movie that night after our argument and I told him we had to talk when we got back to his place later. He just wanted to go enjoy a movie and avoid talking for that moment, so we went.

We ended up walking around the mall because the movie theater was upstairs and we had an hour to kill after we got our tickets.

As we were headed back upstairs an hour later, he pulled me into a “Kay’s” jewelry store.

🎵 Every kiss begins with Kay 🎵

Yep. That one. lol

He said there were always previews before a movie starts, so he wanted to just have fun. He asked me, “If you had to pick out an engagement ring today, which one would you want?”. I was confused, but I also knew that I wanted to get married again someday – (just not to him). So, I decided to play his little game and just have fun and try on engagement rings.

He had a part-time job and he was paying his rent and bills, so I figured there was no way he could even afford an engagement ring, which made me feel confident that he just had the thought of proposing in his head and I’d talk to him later about just being friends.

I tried on a few different rings and finally held my hand out when I found the perfect one that shined so pretty when I held it up. I love the square kind, and I found the one I’d love – if – I was IN LOVE and wanted to get married, but I wasn’t in love. So, I told Aaron that would be the one I want – if I had to pick, and I handed the ring back to the jewelry guy – thanking him for letting me try on a few.

I then told Aaron we had to head upstairs to the movie before we missed the beginning, and I started to walk out of the jewelry store.

When I heard him say, “We’ll take it!”, my heart dropped. I asked what he was doing. I asked where he got the money. He didn’t answer me. I told him not to do this, and he did. He paid the thousands in cash, and I didn’t even want to know how he was able to drop that much all at one time.

He didn’t even get down on one knee or propose in any romantic way. He slid it on my finger and told me, “There! Now we’re engaged and you can change your Facebook status”.

No! That’s not how it works!

I didn’t make a big fuss about that moment at that time because I didn’t want to argue with him in a mall full of people, but as soon as we got back to his place…. we got into an argument because he called me ungrateful, disrespectful and mean.

I didn’t seem happy about the ring – he said.

I made him look stupid in front of the jewelry guy because I didn’t get all excited and at least give him a hug – he said. 

He felt like I didn’t even want the ring, and truth be told – I didn’t. I told him to keep the receipt in case something happens (when we were still at the store).

So, at his place – I already knew I was ending things, and I asked him to sit down, so we could talk. He had been drinking that night and I explained to him how much I love him and care about him as one of my best male friends all these years. How much I’ve appreciated all the times he made me laugh, was there for me or looked out for me and he knew I had done the same for him – for years.

But….I told him our lives are on two totally different paths, and that it wasn’t going to work out for us. I said I would love to continue to be friends and I don’t regret trying to be more, but that there were so many fights over stupid things, and my goals and his didn’t match up.

I tried my hardest to let him know I’d always be there for him as a friend and I didn’t want our friendship to be over, but that I totally understand if he didn’t want to be friends anymore.

He asked if it was because he believes in the extraterrestrial and the government – poisoning us.

See how weird things got???

Still, I cared very much about Aaron, and maybe he could find a woman more like him.

That night, he asked for the ring back because he said I clearly didn’t care about it. I handed it back to him, and before I could stop him – he threw it down the toilet and flushed it. He told me that’s what I think about his gift.

The next morning – I went to go get some of my things that I left at his place and told him I’d be back in a week for the rest. He asked me where the ring was and he didn’t believe me when I told him he flushed it the night before – because he was drinking and didn’t remember the night before.

A few weeks earlier – I had saved a good amount of money from work and went shopping for new clothes and shoes for myself. I had everything packed into a bag and was ready to pick it up the following week, but the following week – Aaron kept making excuses for why I couldn’t come by and get it.

Turns out – he threw all my new clothes and shoes away, and he didn’t want to admit it. He felt bad. He said he was angry about the ring, so he wanted to feel like my money was wasted as well.

We didn’t talk for an entire two years after that, but I was surprised one day when he contacted me on Facebook, apologized for everything, understood why I ended things with him, and offered to pay me for the shoes and clothes he threw out that I purchased myself.

I felt bad about the ring incident, so I told him I didn’t want anything from him – that I was sorry if he felt like I wasted his time in any way, and that I will forever remember him as one of my best friends.

And …..that was that.

I never spoke to him again.

I still laugh when I say he’s one of the weirdest relationships I ever had, but I smile when I think about the friendship we had at one point – as well.

Wherever Aaron is today – I just hope he’s doing well, he’s happy and life is kind to him. 💚

SO, when this friend of mine today – told me about her weirdest / craziest relationship and I told her about Aaron – we had a good giggle, but we also both said we hope our previous boyfriends are doing okay.

   I wish for nothing but the best for them.

Also, I just hope Aaron realized he’s worth so much more than what he was doing with himself in life. I have met some of the sweetest gangsters and thugs – but it’s a scary life and sometimes – you should want more for yourself.

As for his addiction to the aliens, the government and Illuminati – I pray he finds a woman who loves the same theories, stories, research, etc. 😁

I’m sorry (but also not sorry) that I couldn’t be that one for him.

    Anyway……

With another hour to go before I have to head towards work – I’m going to sit here and watch Tiktoks.

My loves – pray I stay awake all night because I’m going to be so tired, and I have to rush home in the morning to get the kids to school, go home and shower and then meet up with my boss at 11 AM for a meeting. 😴

      Xoxo.

      ❤️Shel❤️

Hachi – and some funnies from work.

Hachi – and some funnies from work.

Shel R.1 Comment

Occasionally, I’ll watch a movie that will make me cry.

Tonight, when I came home from work – my daughter said she had a movie to show me.

We sat down after I made pizza, and she showed me:

While some movies make me cry a bit – this one had me straight up bawling my eyes out!

I was in tears!

It’s a true story about a dog who refused to give up, and it shows loyalty, lessons in loss and grief.

My heart broke so much in this movie, and it was such a great one.

If you haven’t seen it yet, I totally recommend checking it out, but be prepared and have some tissues handy. Oy. I’m still thinking about the movie, and to think that it’s a true story – breaks my heart even more. 💔

Anyway –

Let me move on to funnier and happier things because I’m a mess right now after watching this. lol.

I worked this weekend, and you all know Daisy, right?

If you follow along with my posts, you’ll know she’s this little itty-bitty-elderly woman that lives in the facility I work in. She is funny as hell when she’s sober, but when she’s been drinking – she’s a little firecracker, and she’s after everybody!

If you’re in the path of her little “attitude tornado” as I call it now – she’s going to get you!

Yesterday, she was beyond drunk, and it wasn’t even 9 AM yet – I hadn’t even had a full cup of coffee yet – and she was screaming from her side of the building – at another resident on the other side. She was running her mouth, trying to start problems, and going off on this other tenant / resident.

Thankfully – this other resident walked away and didn’t say anything to her.

A while later, Daisy was outside with a few other tenants / residents, and as I was chatting with another tenant / resident, I heard yelling outside. I threw my head back; rolled my eyes and already know it was Daisy yelling at someone else now. The lady she was yelling at – came inside to avoid problems, and I went outside – as Daisy continued to yell, because she was mad that she was in the other lady’s face, and the lady walked inside.

I went out there because we all know I match energies.

These aren’t kids. These are grown adults who get drunk and goofy, and don’t know how to act when they’ve been drinking, so when I got outside – I joked with Daisy and told her if she wants to fight with someone – stand up and fight me.

I was trying to lighten the mood.

She got tough and told me, “I’ll kick your ass!”.

Daisy loves me. I’m not worried about her.

I told her to stand up and let me see it.

I put my fist up.

She stood up and put hers up and almost slipped on ice under the bench she had been sitting on. I told her to sit her ass down before she slips and blames me for it. She wants to fight and can’t even stand up to do it. She joked that she was going to kick me, and I stepped back and told her she would have to reach me – to kick me, and she’s too short for that.

She went on a full rant about the lady who had just walked inside, about the director of the facility I work in, about so many other things that I just let her vent about – because with Daisy – that’s what you have to let her do when she’s been drinking. You just have to let her get it all out, and you know what?

I have learned that Daisy is angry, hurt, emotionally and mentally drained, heartbroken for many different reasons and things she’s been through in her life. Daisy cries a lot when I talk to her. When I really sit down and talk to her whenever she’s on her little rants – she pours her heart out to me.

That’s one of the reasons she loves me. I let her vent. I let her pour her heart out. I joke with her to make her laugh and calm her down. I take the time to hug her, and let her know I’m there for her, and she feels like some of the other staff – could care less and just want to see her leave. They don’t want to take the time to find out what’s going on in her mind or in her heart. They just see a little old troublemaker.

I’ve gotten close to Daisy, and she makes me laugh – even when she’s being a pain in my ass.

So, yesterday (Saturday) when I was working and she went off on a tenant / resident on the other side, and then another one outside and I broke up both of those arguments with other women she had issues with, I asked her to please just behave the rest of the day. She was intoxicated, and I already knew what kind of day it was about to be.

My son was working with me yesterday and at one point, I had just come into the office from doing something I needed to do, and he told me that Daisy promised him she was going back to her room, but she just got on the elevator. We knew what that meant, because she was then angry at this tenant / resident on the 2nd floor – for bringing in guests that Daisy says “messed with my family” – as she told me.

She wanted to go upstairs, knock on this other tenant’s door, and start trouble.

Daisy’s room is on the 1st floor, so we knew what was about to happen.

I grabbed my walkie – ran out of the office door and down the hall and jumped into the elevator right before the doors closed.

Imagine Daisy’s surprise when she had her head down, and I jumped in there and yelled, “Surprise!”. 😂

She turned and looked at me, rolled her eyes and her words were, “Oh, what the hell?”.

I asked where she was going.

She named a guy upstairs – that I knew damn well she wasn’t going to see because she knew damn well – that he left a few hours earlier. We both knew where she was headed, so I told her I’d come upstairs with her and she could pretend she was going to see the guy we both know left earlier that day, but we both know who she was really going upstairs to bother.

She started screaming at me and accusing me of protecting “that white woman!”.

Daisy is Native. I told her I protect all women, and I’d protect her as well if someone was messing with her. She just kept yelling and I kept joking around with her to calm her down.

We walked down the hall – right by the guy’s room where she claimed she was going, and as soon as we got in front of the door I knew she was really looking for, I blocked it. She tried to go around me and knock, and I just stood there, so she couldn’t. She asked if I wanted her to throw me down the stairs, and I giggled and told her, “You know…. that’s the 2nd time in the last few weeks you’ve threatened that and I’m still not scared!”.

We stood there for a bit while she tried to get me out of her way, and I tried different ways to get her to come back downstairs with me. We’ve played this game before and she knows I’m not going back downstairs without her, especially when I know why she’s upstairs and looking for someone.

She eventually came back downstairs with me, and sat in the lobby, crying about different things she’s feeling and telling me how much she loves and appreciates my son and I – because she feels like we’re the only staff – (other than two others) – who really give a damn about her. She said the others – don’t give a shit, and she feels that.

I gave her a hug, and she cried in my arms – and then I sent her back to her room and she actually went.

That wasn’t the end of her.

She came out a few more times yesterday to see what she could get into and start, but I handled it every time.

Today – she was better. She didn’t cause as many issues as she did yesterday, but she was still a bit tipsy and still her little firecracker self.

I had to laugh when she called down to the office at the end of my shift – as I was about to leave and said she heard I called her a “ho”. I started laughing because I knew she was trying to start something, but I also knew she was joking around. I told her I could never think that and that she’s too old to be out there even thinking about being a “ho”, so we both laughed. I laughed even more when she asked if I wanted her to teach me how to be a “ho”. I told her I’m too old to be out like that.

Her: No, you’re not! I can teach you!

I laughed even more when my son laughed and said, “She’s trying to be your pimp”.

I love her sense of humor and despite how many headaches she gives me when she misbehaves, and I have to chase her around the damn building to prevent fights with her and others – she’s one hell of a good woman and not a lot of people see that, realize it or try to understand where her anger and attitudes come from.

I have so much on my mind right now, and a hell of a lot on my plate that I’m trying to figure out, but any time I go to work – these people that live in this facility – make my days brighter, happier, and bring me so much joy.

The tenants / residents love me and my son, and we love them right back.

They know we’re going to do whatever we can for them.

They know we’re going to use humor and joke around to make them laugh or calm them down.

They know we’re firm and tough when we need to be, but we have big hearts and we’re also going to be there for them, love on them, and listen – if that’s what they need.

❤️

This morning – as soon as I walked in to work – I saw a ball fly by my feet.

One of the guys who live there – kicked it towards me. I kicked it back towards him, he kicked back – and we had a little game of mini-soccer (?) or kickball – whatever you want to call it. ha. I actually enjoyed it and I wasn’t even clocked in yet. 😊I didn’t need to be.

I love going to work, and this is why I enjoy going there – because it’s fun. It’s stressful sometimes, but there’s always something to smile or laugh about.

He’s on Oxygen though, so he made me laugh when the ball rolled under a desk, and he told me that I had to get it because if he got it, he wasn’t getting back up. He laughed. I laughed and I went to grab it, as he walked away and tried to catch his breath.

He’s one of the ones I always jokingly yell at because he’ll want his alcohol portion, but he won’t eat and he knows the rule is – he has to eat something first. So, during lunch today, he looked at the clock and told me, “I guess it’s time to feed the garbage can!”. He knew darn well he was about to throw his food away and at least he was honest about it.

There’s another female tenant / resident there – who will come down early in the mornings when I’m there, and she’ll just sit and have coffee with me. We’ll just chat about anything and everything going on in the facility and laugh – as we share some stories from our younger years, and our high school days – (mine in Chicago and hers here in Minnesota) – or we’ll talk about our families, and so on.

I think a lot of dealing with the facility I work in and the stress and the need to be on high alert all the time – is just knowing their personalities, how to deal with each one in their own ways if something pops off, and having that trust between me and each of them, and that’s what I make sure I have.

I want them to know that they can trust me, and while sometimes I have to be tough, meet them on their levels and match their energies, for the most part – I’m understanding, kind, and do my best to just be there for them because a lot of them – have never had that love and trust in their lives. 💕 A lot of them don’t have people who care.

Still, I’m so grateful that no matter what I have on my mind on any given day – I forget it all when I go to work, and they make me laugh, or I’m trying to de-escalate a situation and make someone else laugh.

I’ve said it before – I do love my job!

I also giggled yesterday when Daisy was on a roll with her little rants, and she told me, “Go ahead and call the cops on me like everyone else does!”. I told her I would never call the cops on her – unless they were hot. She looked at me and yelled, “Those are the worst ones!!!!”. 🤔 🤣 Oh, my little Daisy!

In other news………………….

I have boxes all over my living room because I’ve been packing and trying to decide what I want to sell of give away.

I have literally April and a few weeks in May to find a place and I still haven’t, so my stress is high.

I thought about just telling the landlord we plan to stay for another year, but my older son and I had a talk the other day and we said a lot of our stress and our sadness comes from being so far from home. From family, friends and familiar places. From not having many opportunities out here in Minnesota and being in such a small town – where everything shuts down at dusk!

We laughed when we agreed it would be nice to be closer to or in IL. again – so we have a variety of stores and places to eat – all close together and didn’t have to travel miles for it. Where we have many different hospitals all close by and don’t have to drive hours for different ones. Where everything stays open late or all night long.

Where there’s streetlights and places to go, things to see and do.

So, while I’ve thought about maybe staying here for another year, we talked and we agreed we absolutely should not do that, and it would be bad for our mental health and each other.

I know he misses his friends and being able to go out with people he knows – to places he knows, and I know damn well I miss everyone back home and just feeling free to not have to drive 3 hours to go shopping or see a movie or do something fun.

I want to be somewhere where not everybody knows everybody else and where people know to mind their own business because here – that’s not the case. Everyone is in everyone’s business.

I hate it here.

As much as I thought about it for a bit, I also know that I’m not happy here. My kids aren’t happy here and it’s time to go. Still, the headache of finding a place is weighing on me, and it’s time to get going with the process.

Moving sucks.

The packing. The looking for movers or doing it all on our own. The finding a place and signing a new lease. The unpacking. It’s all a big migraine, but it has to be done and in the next few weeks, I’ll be starting the entire process.

I’d love to sit here and write so much more, but my little dude wants to go to bed, and he likes when I hang out in his room and talk to him until he falls asleep. He’s begging me to go chill with him, so I’m ending it here.

Love you.

💕Shel💕

A jot before bed. Sweet dreams!

A jot before bed. Sweet dreams!

Shel R.6 Comments

I must apologize for my lack of writing lately.

I’ve been so busy.

Between searching for our new home, getting ready for my daughter’s graduation, and work – life has been kicking my ass.

I’ve also been helping several other teenagers with their work that many of them are behind on. (My daughter’s friends).

I want to see them all graduate and they’re all like my own kids. Many of them call me “Mom”, and have for years, so I don’t mind helping them. I want to see them walk across the stage, just like I can’t wait to see my daughter do so.

Letters went out a few weeks ago – after the Dean of students met with all of the Seniors and went over their credits and plans after high school. These letters either told parents that their students are not on track to graduation and need to make up credits, as well as the work they need to make up – or – parents got letters that their child *IS* on track to graduation, has their credits needed, or is close to it.

My daughter is one of those on track to graduate, and she has more credits than needed, but still needs 1/2 credit in Building trades – which she’ll get this semester, and one in English – which she’ll also get. So, she’s doing great and I am so proud!

Still, her friends that received letters that they needed credit recovery and are not on the path to graduation, I’ve offered my help and told my daughter, “Have them bring their binders of work or whatever they have to do – over to our house if they need help”.

I have a friend who told me she admires me because no matter what I have on my own plate or what I’m dealing with – no matter what I have on my mind – I’m still opening my home to these teenagers and offering a hot meal when they’re here, my help with their work, and rides from school and back home when they leave.

I just see it as something I have to do – to make sure none of my daughter’s friends are left behind, and I love when they come to me for help. They know I’m going to help if their parents can’t or won’t, and they know my home is safe, clean, and they’re allowed to grab snacks, pop, water – whatever they want, while getting the help they need. ❤️

Work:

Work has been hectic, insane, stressful, exhausting, busy and wild.

We have people coming and going. We have all kinds of things going on – some good and some not so good.

We have our people who drink and can’t handle their liquor, so they’re starting fights and making poor choices, or arguing with staff. We have people who are wild and out of control sometimes, and then – we have those who make us laugh and remind us why we love that job so much. 😊

This past weekend – my son and I were told about a fight that happened during the week, and when we watched the cameras, the fight was comical. It was between two men who live in the facility we work in, and the fight started in one of their rooms, and ended up in the hallway – where you could see them both just fall on the floor and lay there – exhausted and drunk.

My son and I played the cameras back and watched the whole fight.

One of my favorite things about that fight – is when ANOTHER guy was telling us about it this past weekend, and he said he had to go “help break up the fight”. I almost laughed right in his face, but I held it back because again – WE WATCHED THE CAMERAS and this other guy was nowhere in those videos breaking up anything. The fight broke up on its own when they wore themselves out and both dropped to the floor to rest but listen – if this other guy wanted us to think he broke up the fight – more power to him.

Another thing we laughed at this weekend – was when one of our other male residents at the facility – said he’s moving out at the end of the month and asked if I’d sign his boobs.

At first – I looked at him like:

Then, he pulled out ceramic boobs that had a bikini top on them, and he asked me again.

He said he wants everyone to sign his boobs before he leaves. 🤣

I told him I’d be more than happy to sign. I grabbed them and wrote, “Good luck! Love, Shel” – with a heart.

He was so happy and thanked me. My son also signed and I tried to help him out by asking others if they’ve signed his boobs yet, and I got the same funny look – that I had on my face when he first asked me, but others laughed – just like I did – when he explained. ha.

He’s the same man who always asks me if I’ll dip my finger in his food before he eats it, and I never know if he’s serious or just joking – and no, I’ve never done it! lol. I’m a good sport about it and I’ll laugh, but I always wonder if he’s serious. No, I’ll never do it – even if he is!

He’s such a sweetheart though. I’m going to miss his silliness when he leaves.

So, I joked with him and made him laugh when I handed his ceramic boobs back – and told him, “Now I can cross SIGNING BOOBS – off my bucket list!”.

Last time I wrote – I also talked about “Daisy”. That feisty little elderly woman who gives a lot of problems sometimes, but over the past few weeks, I’ve shown her nothing but love, compassion, honesty, and respect – and believe me when I tell you – that if you show that to the people in this facility – they usually show it right back and they know who truly cares about them – and who is just there for a paycheck.

They can tell!

I’ve gotten close to Daisy over the last few weeks, and while others see her as a problem or troublemaker, I see her as someone who is hurting, who has been hurt in the past, who has a lot to say and nobody to listen, and who just wants that love and compassion that my son and I show her when we’re there.

She’s a great person if you really get to know her. Not a lot of our staff take the time to show her the love, care, compassion and respect that we have, and I hate to say it – but if they did – they’d change their perspectives about her.

This morning, I was dealing with one issue that was going on – on the 2nd floor, and when I walked up the stairs – as I passed Daisy’s room, I heard her yelling and screaming, so I made a mental note to stop by there as soon as I handled this other situation going on.

When I did, Daisy was grateful to see me, told me she hurt her leg really bad, and needed help putting her shoe on. All day today, I’ve checked on Daisy – did whatever I could for her – and locked up our office a few times – to go take care of Daisy.

Daisy has started calling me, “My girl”. It’s too cute! She’ll say, “How are you doing today, my girl?”, “I’ll see you later, my girl!”.

Today when I was leaving work, she was outside and she yelled, “I love you, my girl. Thank you for everything you do and did for me, Shel”. She never walks away from me now or hangs up if she calls the office – without telling me, “Love you, my girl!”.

I just wish our other staff would take the time to get to really know her, understand her, and communicate with her – like we have.

They see a troublemaker. A problem. A headache. I see an aunt figure. A grandma figure. A lady who just wants to be cared about. ❤️

I have learned that if she is screaming, yelling, cursing or angry about someone – I’m the one who can always get her to smile, calm her down, joke with her – and get her to behave. (At least until my shift is over). lol. We have an understanding, and I think as mothers – she and I share grief because she lost her older son and she shared that story with me, and I shared the story of losing my oldest daughter.

I know that pain!

She’s native, so she found out I want to learn the language and told me I need to come hang out with her when I’m not working.

In fact, everyone in the facility loves my son and I so much – and the love and care we show them – that we’ve been offered to go hang out with a few of them.

Just yesterday when we were almost off of work – one of them called the office and she had a few others in the room with her. They wanted us to come hang out in there when we clocked out. As much as we would have loved to kick back and chill with them – it’s against policy and we had to keep it professional, so we just let them know one of our lead staff was coming in, and we couldn’t do that, but we thanked her and others for the offer.

We’ve been told by many of them that we’re two of the best employees the facility has, and a few of them have loved the fact that no matter what we have on our minds, what’s going on in our personal lives, or how we feel any day we’re at work – we always go in with a smile, use humor to handle situations, and joke around with all of them.

They enjoy that. Even on the days when I work alone and it gets crazy, busy and wild – I joke and smile, because it means a lot to them.

I just found out on yesterday morning – that one of the female residents wanted me to go to a Drag show with her – that had free food and drinks, or promotions going on. She said by the time she came down to invite me to go with her, my shift was over and I was gone. She said she wanted to ask the 2nd shift if they have my phone number, but she felt awkward and didn’t know the facilities rules about that.

She’s one of our coolest residents, and so – I wrote down my number and handed it to her.

Was I supposed to? Probably not, but I think it’s all about knowing who you can trust and know that they won’t cross any boundaries, and who you know you can absolutely NOT give that kind of information to.

I love this job. I’ve said it many times. I love our residents.

Some of them even cook or bake for us. 😁There’s one that has made us brownies and cookies on more than one occasion, and she’ll bring those down for us. Daisy made us fry bread one day, and that was amazing. I’ve had a resident make me a dreamcatcher, and another one who drew me a photo and plans to make me a few Eagle drawings soon.

Again, it’s all about how you treat them because once they know you really do care and this isn’t just for a paycheck – they’re going to look out for you and love you / respect you right back!

I giggled today when Daisy asked me when I’d be back, and I told her I don’t work again until Saturday. She rolled her eyes and told me that’s way too long. I told her I’d be back if someone asked me to cover their shift.

One thing I’ve also learned at this job – is that when something goes down – you have to know how to personally handle each and every person differently, and what works or what doesn’t with each one. We’ve learned that and there’s some people there that my son handles if he’s there, and there’s some people that communicate better with me and I’ll tell him, “I got this!”. The days when I’m alone at work – and it’s just me – I try to handle each situation calmly, and firmly – so they know I’m not messing around, but I also care very much.

I think with a lot of them being addicts or previous addicts, most of them drunk on most days, and dealing with some who are criminals, we always have to be careful, but knowing them personally – and having them respect us – helps us – or at least me – know that sometimes – we have to meet them where they are and talk to them – how they’ll understand.

One couple in the facility recently broke up and the lady asked me to watch her collect her things from her ex-boyfriend’s room. I went upstairs to watch, and I stood in the doorway while she grabbed her things. Her ex-boyfriend wasn’t in there, and I had my back turned – when I heard him come up behind me and yell – TO ME -, “What the F*** are you doing in my room?”. He likes to talk to her like that, and it aggravates many of us, but we try not to say anything. So, I turned to face him and MET HIM ON HIS LEVEL!

I matched his energy.

I calmly – but firmly said, “What the f*** are you doing talking to me like that?”. The look of surprise on his face was priceless, and he lowered his tone. I told him she was getting her things, and he didn’t have much to say after that.

I also joked that I have one foot in his room, and one foot in the hallway, so technically – I’m not really IN his room. He stayed quiet for the most part – the rest of the time she was getting her stuff. Some of them – you just have to meet them on their level and let them know you’re not the one to mess with, and they get it. A lot of them will show respect once they learn they can’t do whatever they want, and if they show us respect, we give it right back – and vice versa.

Could he have knocked me on my ass if he wanted to? Most likely, but I wasn’t going to go down easy, and if I thought he was going to do anything, I may have thought twice, but I know him. I’ve gotten to learn that he’s also hurting and he’s been through a lot, and he needs someone to tell it like it is.

SO, work has been wild the last week or two, and now that the weather is semi getting nicer a bit, it’s going to get even crazier at work, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. It keeps us on our toes, and keeps us busy, so time goes by faster.

I have a different approach to different people and situations there, but it works every time. I can joke around and make you laugh, so you communicate with me and do what I’m asking of you or to calm you down, or – I can be tough and firm – but either way, however I approach things – they usually work. I know who I have to be tough and firm with, and those that I can joke with to make a situation go away.

I’m tired.

This job is draining, but still – I’m grateful for it. T

The moving thing …………………..

Don’t even get me started.

I’m so tired of looking for our new place.

I’ve found a few different places I loved, and the internet is full of scams.

I’ve emailed properties – only to get someone message me back and say, “I’m currently in Texas on business, but if you want to send me the deposit, I can show you the house when I get back in two weeks”, blah. blah. blah. I’ve gotten a few of those from people in different states – and then I look up the property on Zillow, and it shows that it’s for sale, or it’s off the marker and an actual family lives there.

It always makes me wonder if they’re aware that people are putting their properties online and scamming other people with it.

I’d never send money online.

I watched a video of some poor girl who was able to go see a house for rent, get the code to the lockbox for the key, and go in to tour the home, so she thought everything was legit – only to send the landlord $5,000 for a few months of rent upfront, and the home was for sale. It wasn’t being rented and this girl just got scammed out of all that money – from some “out of state” landlord claiming he’d be back soon to meet her.

It’s so scary with all of the scams going on now.

If I do find a legit listing – either they don’t allow pets, or it’s a really nice place – but the bedrooms are the size of a small bathroom. If all looks good, I don’t like the kitchen or there’s very little counter and cabinet space, or if a place is perfect – something always throws me off.

Maybe I’m being too picky!

So, I haven’t found the perfect place yet. I know I have to really start looking and going to take a look in person because I want to have something locked and secured by May 1st, but it’s just been a headache. I know damn well I don’t want to stay here in Minnesota, but I also know traveling to see other places is going to be a migraine as well.

I plan to have a list of places to look at, and appointments set before I go anywhere, and still – I’m stalling to pack. I’m stalling to keep looking, and I know I really have to.

I’ve been doing that almost every day – besides work, helping teens get work done, and getting ready for my daughter’s graduation, so it’s all been slamming me, and I haven’t had time to write.

Loves….

I miss you all so much.

I’ll catch up tomorrow.

My laptop battery is dying, and I have to be up early.

Sweet dreams.

❤️Shel❤️

Non-existent Nipple piercings, work insanity, and cute shoes.

Non-existent Nipple piercings, work insanity, and cute shoes.

Shel R.Leave a comment

Good morning my darlings.

(Photo above – is thanks to Chica Dibujo cafe on Pinterest).

I’ve actually just started getting back into Pinterest lately and I love it.

I finally have a day off.

I’m sitting at the kitchen table enjoying a cup of coffee and semi-silence.

I say semi-silence because my little guy is playing his video games in the living room, but he has the T.V. on low, so I can still think. ha.

I’m just going to share whatever is on my heart and in my mind today, and some funnies of course!

Let’s start with Friday and what it’s like being a working mom. 🤔

So-called sick and the NIPPLE PIERCINGS story:

You’re probably like – WHAT THE HELL?!

Wait for it!

So, on Friday – I ended up working for one of the lead staff who didn’t feel like going in because she was going through burnout, and I get that, so I went in for her. Plus, I could always use the extra money.

That morning, my little dude tried to stay home from school and say he didn’t feel well – because he heard that his good friend he plays online with – was able to stay home because HE didn’t feel well. I giggled and told him, “Absolutely NOT – because even if you stay home from school, you’re not playing video games when you say you don’t feel well”. He went to school.

I was sitting at work, and the school nurse called me. She said my little dude didn’t feel good, and she wanted to know if she could give him some medicine and send him back to class. I giggled and told her how he tried to stay home that morning and why, and I said he was fine. She had no doubt he was fine because he had no fever, and he wasn’t sneezing, coughing, etc. She tried to put his mind at ease by giving him some medicine and sending him back to class, telling him that if anything else was wrong – he could come back.

An hour later, my older son messages me and says that my daughter tried to call me, but I didn’t answer. She wanted him to get ahold of me – to let me know that she was caught with her cell phone and it was taken away.

I asked if he was serious and he said yes.

As I’m trying to work – I’m dealing with knowing that my little dude is going to go right back to the nurse and try to come home again, and now I had to deal with my daughter and this phone situation.

For those who don’t know – her high school is one of the schools that implemented these goofy Yondr pouches that students have to lock their cell phones in while at school, and they get them unlocked at the end of the day. If you don’t know – I’ve been against these things from the beginning of this new rule years ago, and I tried to tell the principal that my daughter is NOT putting her phone in the pouch, and she WILL be keeping it on her.

I’m all for my daughter following rules and listening to authority, but this is one rule I didn’t want to play by.

As a parent who already lost one child, my mama heart is so scared to not be able to get ahold of my kids – wherever they are – if they’re out of my sight.

We have a town siren that goes off for three reasons. A tornado / bad weather, when it’s noon, and calling for volunteer firefighters when something happens. So, whenever it goes off – my daughter will message me and say she’s fine and everything is fine if she’s at school. It makes me feel better, puts my mind at ease, and I don’t have to call the office for every little thing to make sure everything is good.

She’s had her phone in her sports bra for the last few years, and it’s worked out great.

I felt even better when I found out that other parents were making sure their students put their phones in their belt buckles, in their back pockets, in their boots, or wherever they needed to hide it. Some kids have used burner phones to put in the pouches and kept their real phones on them. So, I’m not the only parent who doesn’t agree with these Yondr pouches, and truthfully – if I were a principal – there wouldn’t be any Yondr pouches.

If something were to happen, I’d much rather have a bunch of worried and concerned parents in the parking lot – that remain calm and let the police do their jobs – because they’ve been able to reach their students by cell phones and know their child is okay – rather than a bunch of parents losing their minds pushing past police – and trying to find their kids.

I’ve tried to fight this policy, and it went nowhere.

The school has told me that students can call their parents from the office phone, but what if something happens or there’s a lockdown, and they can’t get to the office phone? I’ve argued that as well, and they had no real answers for me, but they insisted they were keeping the pouches as a new policy years ago.

Anyway, my daughter isn’t the only one who has had her phone on her for years. So, when I called the school on Friday, the office lady – (who I get along just fine with) told me she isn’t the only one who was caught. She giggled a bit and said there’s piles of phones in the office from students who were caught as well, and that if I wanted to come get her phone, I could do so.

One of the other lead staff at work was amazing at looking out for me and told me to go. I told her I’d be right back.

So, I drove to the school, went inside and as soon as I saw the principal, I smiled and joked with her. I asked how those Yondr pouches are working out for her – because obviously if that many students had their phones on them, they found ways around it, and they’re going to continue to find ways around it. I asked if she was still going to continue to use them, and she said she thinks they’re working on great and plans to continue to use them. She also said it’s her job to continue to search students.

She smiled and told me that my daughter tried telling her over and over again that she has NIPPLE PIERCINGS, and that’s why the wand went off when they wanded her. No, my daughter does NOT and will NEVER have NP’s, but I giggled when the principal told me this. My daughter joked a few times that she’d say that if she ever got wanded, but I didn’t know she’d actually say it, and she did.

When I talked to my daughter, she said she would have stuck to that story, but she felt bad because the principal tilted her head a bit, and told my daughter, “Lani, please make job easier”. So, my daughter – (who has always been taught to be honest and tell the truth) – took out her phone and handed it to the principal. The principal thanked her for being honest finally and told her that her phone would be in the office.

I asked the principal why my daughter was even wanded, and I was told that they had a K-9 (drug and gun sniffing dog) come in that day – that went to all the classes for searches, and I know they do that randomly, so it’s common for them to do these things. She said any student who wasn’t able to take off their hoodie or didn’t want to – got wanded, and my daughter didn’t have a T-shirt under her hoodie, so she’s one of the ones who couldn’t and got wanded. The wand of course – beeped, and it wasn’t because of any piercings of course!

From what I hear, students are already coming up with new, creative ways to hide their phones, so do I think this is going to stop it? No. Do I think they’re just going to get better at hiding them? Yes.

Thankfully, the students that got caught with phones – aren’t in trouble, but I do think that the school is going to be more aware, do more searches, and keep on top of this from now on. Again, I know it’s wrong for going against the school policy all these years – but it has given me peace of mind that if something happens – I can easily contact my daughter because she has her phone, and she has felt better having her phone on her because there’s been times things are going on, parents get no calls, and my daughter has been able to message me.

Example:

The high school went into lockdown a few years back because there were four fights going on at once – that turned into a big group brawl on the first floor from what I heard.

Parents did get calls that day – that the school was on lockdown, and I was a nervous wreck. I tried calling my daughter over and over because I knew she had her phone, and she wasn’t answering. I didn’t even care if I got a ticket that day, but I was on my way home from the nearest city and stepped on the gas to get to the school. If a cop tried to stop me, he could write me a ticket at the school, but as a parent – my heart dropped and I was so worried.

Thankfully – BECAUSE MY DAUGHTER HAD HER CELL PHONE ON HER – she was able to message me and tell me, “Mom, I’m okay. I’m on the 2nd floor. They won’t let anyone down or anyone come up”. She was also able to text me when the lockdown lifted, and she was in her next class, so I was able to slow down, do the speed limit and I felt so much better.

Thus – the reason they should do away with these Yondr pouches.

Some parents love them and agree with it. I’m not one of those parents. HELL, I’ve seen teachers disagree with the policy. So, we all have our different opinions. Anyway, I just thought the Nipple piercing story she really did try to give – was hilarious.

I got her phone and went back to work. As soon as I pulled into the parking lot, my phone rings and it’s the school nurse stating that my son is back in her office, and says he has a headache and wants to throw up. I shook my head and laid my head back on my headrest in the car – because being a working parent – is not for the weak, and parenting never stops – even when you’re at work. I told the nurse to let me talk to him, and I convinced him to go back to class, try to finish the day, and that it’s Friday, so if he doesn’t feel good – he has all weekend to rest.

He played video games all weekend with no issues and hasn’t complained once – about not feeling well. 🤣

****

Work and attachment:

You all know I work in a facility that houses the once homeless, some criminals, drug and alcohol addicts.

I’ve talked about it before. You also know how much I love my job if you’ve followed my blog and have read it for so long.

Yes, there’s days that are wild and I don’t get to sit down and catch a break, and there’s some days that are a lot of fun. There are some days that are super boring and nothing happens at all, so I get to sit down, relax, and just kick back until it’s time to leave.

This weekend – was insane.

We have a little elderly woman that I’ll call “Daisy”. I absolutely love Daisy and she’s become like an aunt to me. I joked that I was just there recruiting my new family. She gives words of wisdom, and she’s hilarious when she wants to be, but she’s also a little firecracker and you’d never know that she could wreck so much havoc just by looking at her. Some people describe her as “dangerous”.

Still, she makes me laugh and drives me crazy all at the same time. 😁

I’ve grown to adore her, and to watch the cameras closely when she’s out and about because she WILL cause trouble. lol. It’s wild that I say those two things in the same sentence, but it’s true.

Unfortunately, she has been asked to leave the facility by the end of the month because she’s got so many write-ups, and she’s always in the middle of whatever is going on. It breaks my heart to know she won’t be there anymore after next week; I won’t see her, I won’t have to watch the cameras when she’s out and about, and my days at work may get a little calmer. I don’t know if I want that calm or if I’ve gotten used to the madness at work, but I’ll definitely miss her craziness.

On Friday, she was on a roll.

She was going off about anything and everything. She was going off on everyone. She was yelling. She was complaining. She was screaming about different things, and she promised she wasn’t screaming at me – but more so – screaming at everything going on – and venting TO me. She vented about lead staff. She vented about people who live there and are on her “shit list”. She vented about her write-ups, and all kinds of things, and I just let her. I knew she was angry. I knew she needed to let it all out.

She also told me she was going to “raise hell until she leaves”. I kind of made her smile when I so seriously told her, “Please don’t do that! Especially on the weekends when my son and I are here”. She promised me she wouldn’t raise hell on the weekends when we’re there, but Saturday – oh Lord! She raised hell and took it to the max while we were there – from the time we walked in, to the time we left – we were both busy chasing Daisy around and getting her to behave.

At one point, she was yelling at another tenant / resident, and I told her she promised she would be good on the weekends. She yelled, “I didn’t promise shit!”. I told her she really did. She said she doesn’t remember that.

Saturday, she was chasing people, looking for people to curse out that she doesn’t like, going off on people, and just doing some off the wall – wild stuff. My son dealt with her the first half of our shift and got her to go back to her room finally, and the 2nd half of the shift, I was already done with it. I grabbed my walkie and told my son, “I got this!”, and I headed upstairs to where she did NOT belong.

As soon as I got up there and she saw me, she yelled, “WHAT?”.

I looked at her, raised my head a bit and told her:

I told her she needed to go downstairs to her room before I pick her up and carry down the stairs. I tried joking with her, but that didn’t work.

She yelled back, “I’m going to push you down the stairs. What are you going to do about that?”.

I smiled and told her, “Please don’t!”. She kept screaming, so the entire 2nd floor could hear her, and yelling that she doesn’t “give a f****”. Eventually, she looked down at her feet and so calmly said, “Hey! My socks don’t match!”. I laughed and told her, “Neither do mine today!”. I told her I just grabbed two that were clean and threw them on because I hadn’t matched socks after laundry yet.

I told her if she came downstairs with me, I’d give her juice and snacks or whatever she wanted. She said she didn’t want any of that, but that she’d come downstairs with me. She asked if I wanted to race, and she blamed her mismatched socks for the reason she lost. 🤣

I thought all was okay, but then she started screaming on the first floor – about different things that pissed her off.

She kept telling me she wasn’t yelling at me, but she needed to let me know everything going on that lead staff doesn’t want to talk about or deal with. I told her I understood. I tried to sympathize with her, and she grabbed papers and a pen from the suggestion box – to write down whatever she wanted to say to lead staff. She told me she was going to “take this place down”. I made her laugh when she tried to start writing and the cap was still on. I told her, “Daisy, you have to take the pen cap off if you’re going to take this place down and write your little heart off!”.

Saturday, she drove us crazy and she was all over the place causing issues. So many incident reports were written on her, and she was furious with our director. So much, that she wanted us to call her in, so she could confront her. I told her I wasn’t doing that, and she could see the director when she came in this week.

Yesterday (Sunday):

She was better.

She stood in the hallway and talked to me for almost three hours.

We laughed so much, and she was fun yesterday. I was strict with her yesterday and told her that she at least has to behave until 3 PM – when I leave. She looked at the clock and so hilariously asked, “Just until 3?”. I told her, “Just until 3 at least!”. She said she guesses she can do that, and she did!

She actually behaved for me.

I had to laugh when she started getting a bit wild about 2:45, and I told her she better be good for the next shift. She told me, “Nuh – uh! You said until 3 PM, and I only have 15 minutes left!”. lmfao. She had me laughing so much yesterday. I’m not even joking when I tell you that at 3 PM on the dot – one of our other tenants / residents came down and told us that Daisy punched him in the head. He was laughing about it, and so were we – when he didn’t even want a report written up and just said, “I’m okay, but that little woman has a fierce punch!”. He didn’t say why she punched him, but he said she was mad about something.

Listen. At least she kept it bottled up until our shift ended like she promised.

Still – a part of me is sad that she has to leave. There’s one other that drives us insane, but he’s been asked to leave as well.

These things are never easy, and I know we get told not to get attached to our tenants / residents, but there’s a piece of us that starts to care for them on a personal level. There’s a part of us that starts to love them like family, and we do get attached. So, to think we may never see them again – it’s heartbreaking in a way.

At the same time – many of them have grown to love us, and a lot of them always tell my son and I – that we’re the best employees they’ve gotten in a long time. They know we care and we want the best for them.

It also broke my heart this weekend when I was telling one of the ladies who likes to sit and talk to us – that we may move this summer. She asked where and I told her we are trying to get closer to IL. but possibly Wisconsin. She looked so sad, and I told her we’d come back to visit often. She killed me when she told me, “That’s what everyone tells us, but once they leave – they never come back and visit us”. They’ve seen so many staff members come and go, but when they get close to staff – it breaks their hearts even more when staff leaves and lies to them about coming back to visit.

They already have trust issues from their pasts, so to have staff that leave – lie and say they’ll come visit and don’t – I don’t want to be a part of that. I really do want to come back and vacation here in Minnesota from time to time and visit them. I want them to trust me and see that I will come see them and check in here and there.

I also plan to give some of them my personal number, so they can call and check in, and I can see how they’re doing, and so some of them can call me and talk if they need someone to listen. I’ve seen them at their bests, and I’ve seen them at their worsts, and they always push through whatever they go through. ❤️

We also know that at this job, we have to stay professional and just numb ourselves to those who leave and can’t come back, or those we lose for other reasons. When I first started this job, I got super close to this one woman I’ll call “Shannon”. She and I used to always joke around, and I’d tell her boyfriend not to come downstairs without my homegirl. She passed away a few weeks after I met her.

And – just like nurses and doctors who lose patients – we staff at this job – have to numb our feelings and go on with our work.

So, I continue to love this job and do what I can for people. I continue to show up and love everyone there. I continue to listen. To try to help. To be there for our residents, and to try to make them laugh when I can.

I had one of our younger co-workers yesterday – tell my son and I that she HATES when we’re there because everyone is so “chatty”.

I took it personal because we’re a lot of fun. What do you mean you HATE when we’re there? She meant that, too!

My son told me he feels like it’s jealousy because not everyone comes and talks to her – like they talk to us.

Not everyone comes and gifts her things – like they gift us things they’ve made.

Not everyone calls or comes to the office to say goodbye to her – like they do to us when our shifts end.

He told me not to take it personal, but her little comments sometimes – are wild.

I try not to say anything back to her because I know she’s only 18. I’m not petty, and as someone way older than her – I try to keep my calm with her comments and laugh it off. I did say something like, “Why? We’re a lot of fun when we’re here! Many love us for it, and some hate us for it!”. When I said that “some hate us for it” comment, it was directed at her. Still, I tried to bite my tongue further and not take it too far.

She’s young and many of her comments in the past have been unnecessary, but still – I always try to remember I’m way older, and it’s not worth any comments I can make back. I don’t need to be petty, and I try to always remain funny, professional, and kind.

So, we go to work. Love everyone there. Be nice to those with negative comments – like her and just enjoy our days as much as we can.

*****

Funny shoe story:

I had to run to Walmart for a few things on Friday after I got the kids from school.

Upon walking to the back to get bunny food for Lani’s bunny – I passed the women’s shoe isle, and saw these:

I’m sorry, but these are totally cute!

Both of my kids – my little dude and my daughter – at the same time – both told me “NO!”.

My son called them ugly and my daughter told me she’s doing me a favor by taking them out of the cart and not letting me walk out of the store with them. It made me laugh, but I told her I wasn’t trying to impress anyone, I love them, and I’m taking them.

They continued to tell me NO.

I played a little game of Tug of War with my daughter, and she laughed when I told her to UNHAND my shoes!

Did I get them? I sure did!!!!!!

It’s Winter. I’m not trying to go buy anything fancy right now, and I really do love these shoes. 😁 They’re also comfortable.

My kids teased me that these are “old people shoes”, and my co-worker laughed when I told her the story, and she asked if she was old because she actually likes them as well. Yep. I told her we’re both old and we need to just admit it.

Loves.

I’d love to write more and I’m sure I have a ton of other things to write, but I can’t concentrate because my little dude has just decided to sit next to me and make tons of noise until I go watch a movie with him. So, I’m going to end it here, and hopefully – I’ll be back tonight to catch up on what all of you have going on.

I also truly do promise to answer emails that some of you have sent me. I swear I will tonight.

XOXO.

❤️Shel❤️

Stranger photo sessions, and rewards of hard work and a little Love.

Stranger photo sessions, and rewards of hard work and a little Love.

Shel R.1 Comment

Loves!

Just a little fun thought…………………..

If you want to meet someone special and you’re ready to fall in love, but don’t want to do the bar or club scene – or the dating apps thing – I just saw the cutest way to meet someone.

There’s a photographer that allows you to fill out applications for a photo session WITH A STRANGER, and she will literally pair up whoever she thinks is best together. You don’t see each other until the day of the photo shoot, and she’ll put you back-to-back, you’ll turn around at the same time – and face each other.

I’ve seen so many of her photography sessions where people really look like they’ve been dating forever now, and they’re real couples, but they’re not. They just met the day of…………

How cute is that?!!!!!!

I think it’s a fun way to meet someone, and she does say on her videos that some of her clients are actually dating now and have become couples from her sessions – where they started out as strangers. 🤗

If you’re open to it – why not give it a try?!

Check her out on TIKTOK.

@brooke.three.photo

No, she did NOT pay me to promote her.

I just thought this was totally adorable and it’s a new way to meet your person – possibly! If not, you at least – get a fun photoshoot out of it and have a good time. I mean, if I met someone like that – it would be a really fun story to tell people – if we became a couple afterwards, and if not – I’d hang the pictures from the session up over my computer desk and when people ask, “Who is he?”, I’d have fun smiling and saying, “I have NO CLUE! He was a one-time deal”. People would wonder, and I’d have fun letting them. lol.

Book your session and if you meet someone special and fall in love – if you end up with your photo stranger – YOU’RE WELCOME! ha.

*****

On to other things………….

My job.

It can get overwhelming sometimes.

It can get stressful sometimes.

It can get scary sometimes.

It can get dangerous sometimes.

However – it can be fun.

It can be rewarding.

It can be life changing.

It can be exciting.

It can be interesting.

It can be amazing.

I love it every moment of it. No matter what each day brings, and each day always bring something new.

I love it, no matter what happens.

One thing I love the most about it – is knowing that I’m changing lives and knowing that the people in the facility I work in – trust me, love me, and know that they can count on me to care.

They’ve been through a lot in their lives. A lot of them are addicts, previous addicts, alcoholics, criminals, felons, and have been through hell and back. A lot of them have been betrayed, lied to, ignored by society, treated like they’re nothing – so they don’t trust a lot of people anymore. They have problems, and issues. Many of them have mental health issues, and no respect for authority, so if you don’t earn their respect and trust – if they feel like you don’t give a damn about them – you’re not going to like how they act towards you.

But …..if you show you love them, you care about them, you’re there for them, they can trust you, and you respect them ….

If you make them laugh, joke with them, make them enjoy you being there – you’re going to see how real they are. How cool they are. How sweet they can be. How much they respect you right back.

It’s all about building rapport with them.

I’d like to say that my son and I have done that since we started working in this facility, and that we have a pretty great relationship with most of the tenants who live in this facility.

It makes us feel good, and several times now – many of them have come up to us and told us that we are their favorite staff members there.

Many of them look for us, and when they see my car pull up, they come down or out of their rooms just to say hello to us and chat.

It makes us feel good knowing we’re making a difference and they like seeing us at work.

I am totally in love with my job and the work I do there – for the following reasons:

Last week, my son and I were getting off of our shift and one of our female tenants called downstairs to the front office just to tell us goodbye. She said she knew we leave at 3 PM and wanted to say bye before we left. She told us to have a great evening, and she can’t wait until we come back.

Right after her, a male tenant called down to the front office to tell us to have a great night, and said he wanted to catch us before we left because he loves us and enjoys us being there.

We laughed a bit when one of our co-workers who had just come onto the 2nd shift – looked at us, and said, “Whoa! You guys get two calls just saying goodbye and have a good night, and I haven’t gotten any?”. It’s a good feeling when our tenants acknowledge us and show their love for us because it makes us feel like we’re doing something right. 💕 I do know though – that this co-worker who said what she said – is loved there as well, even if she hasn’t gotten any calls like we did. So, I hope she doesn’t feel bad about it.

As we were leaving, another lady sitting in the lobby – told us to hurry back.

So –

We have this guy who lives in the facility – that I’ll call “G”. G likes to draw and he’s so damn good at it.

Some of his drawings are hung up around the facility. He draws native things. He draws beautiful Eagles and backgrounds, and so many other pictures.

A few different staff members have gotten amazing photos that “G” drew for them, and a few months ago – I mentioned that I was going to tell “G” that I wanted a photo. My son laughed and joked about it and he told me, “You can’t just tell him you want a photo. He has to genuinely like you and WANT to give you one of his drawings and photos”. I agreed with my son and decided to just wait it out and see if “G” gave me one on his own.

He always comes to say hi to us when we’re there and joke around with us. He’s a great guy.

When he came down last week to say hello, he showed me a beautiful photo of two Eagles he drew and I absolutely loved it. I thought he was going to give it to me, but he told me it was for another co-worker of mine and asked when she’d be in. I wasn’t too upset because she’s an older lady and she needs and deserves some good cheer, so I knew it would make her happy. I was a little disappointed that it wasn’t for me, and when he went back up to his room, my son laughed that day and joked with me – telling me, “Awe! Are you okay? You really thought that was for you, didn’t you?!”. 🥺🤣

I told him I was a little salty because – yes, I did think that.

Well, we were working this weekend.

Sundays are usually laid-back and chill. Not a lot is going on, so after breakfast, many of our tenants went back to their rooms, and all was quiet and boring.

I decided to print out a coloring page because that’s how bored we were, and my son printed out a few of his own he liked.

Yes, we sat there and colored for a few hours.

As I was coloring my first coloring page – (which was a few 90’s trolls’ dolls) – one of our tenants came out of her room, saw me coloring it, and told me how much she loves how it was coming out. I thanked her. She asked what I was going to do with it when I was done.

I told her I wasn’t sure, and I tried to change the subject because I knew where she was about to go with her question.

My plan was to take the page home because I collect those 90’s trolls – and I was going to frame the page I colored and hang it above my computer desk – where all my trolls are, but then – my plans were diverted. This woman smiled and told me, “I’d like to have it if that’s okay. When you’re done, you can sign it and give it to me if you don’t mind”.

I ended up finishing it, signing it, writing on the bottom “Always remember me”, and giving it to her when I saw her later in the day.

She was so excited, she went and asked our nurse for a frame when our nurse stopped by for a little bit.

She got her frame, came and showed me that she nicely framed it, and said she was going to hang it up in her room.

Listen.

I really wanted that picture I colored, but if it made her as happy as it did – I felt good about giving it to her.

I could have colored another one for myself, but by then – I was over that picture and printed out a new one for myself.

I ended up coloring the one below – to take home and frame. I was going to print out a quote that said, “We’re looking at each other a little too hard to just be friends”, and tape it to the top – to frame it all later in the day.

The hearts in her hair – I did that. I got creative with it. 🤗

This colored picture didn’t come home with me, either.

“G” came down to talk for a bit, and he showed me a photo he drew.

I loved it!!!

It reminded me of my dad because my dad liked country western stuff, things from Texas for some reason, and bulls. My dad loved Rodeo stuff as well, and I have one of his old belt buckles somewhere – that has a bull on it. My mom gave it to me when he passed because I love Rodeos and all that country western stuff – even though I’m a city gal.

So, when “G” showed me this photo –

I wanted it!

It looked like something from Texas. ha. I mean – it also looked like the belt buckle I have.

Like my son says though – “You can’t just ask G for a photo. He has to WANT to give you one!”.

I told him I love it, and how nice it is, and guess what?

“G” – GAVE IT TO ME!!!!! He told me it’s for me.

I was so excited to finally get a “G” photo. My son laughed at my excitement and asked if I thought I was special now that I have one.

YES, I DO! 🤗

It also makes me feel appreciated, and that they love me – just as much as I love them.

I ended up giving the 2nd page I colored of trolls – to “G” to thank him for the drawing he gave me.

My son made me smile when he told me, “I know you didn’t want to give up your trolls coloring page the first time, but you did. So, I guess you can consider that drawing G gave you, God’s way of letting good Karma come back around to you!”. 💕

Good Karma came around twice on Sunday because a while later, a woman I’ll call “Marie” – who makes and sometimes sells Dreamcatchers – came down to the office. She told me she made me something and wants me to have it.

She handed me this:

I absolutely love this as well.

I was so happy Sunday, and this is why I do what I do, and love the people at this facility.

If you respect them, show them love, show you care, show that you have time for them and what they’re going through – they’re going to show you love right back.

So, while this job can get dangerous and crazy – it also comes with rewards, and things like these – that make it worth it.

Fun fact: (not really fun, but me being sarcastic):

We just got a notification from our big boss in our work group chat that gives us instructions on what to do if ICE shows up at our facility.

It’s been said that our governor is cooperating with ICE and Mr. Trump now – to turn over all illegal criminals, and while I don’t know if we have any immigrants in our facility, I will say that it’s scary dealing with ICE at all.

I think here in Minnesota – this has all gotten way out of control, and with people being murdered and hurt in protests – I don’t think anyone is “safe” from it, but I felt comfortable knowing ICE and protests were 4 hours away, and not in our area. Has ICE been in our area before? Yes. Not a lot though, and they did what they had to do and got out. Has ICE showed up at work before? No. So, the thought that it could happen – is a little wild, but all we can do is pray that it is all peaceful if and when they do.

That being said, I have nothing else to write.

My daughter just called from school – to ask if one of her friends could come over, so they can work on a presentation together that’s due Thursday.

While I wanted to say “no”, and maybe tomorrow – she told me they need to get this done, so I said yes, and now – I’m figuring out what to make for dinner, because I’m guessing her friend will stay for dinner. I don’t mind. I’m just a little tired, and that means I have to drive the friend home later.

It’s so cold outside, and once I get in my house after picking up the kids from school, I like to stay there! 🥶

Still, I am happy her and her friend are being responsible and working on whatever they have due.

Love you.

Stay warm.

💕Shel💕

When work comes home with you – you have to unleash and release.

When work comes home with you – you have to unleash and release.

Shel R.3 Comments

Today has been one hell of a day.

Usually, Sundays are relaxing at work. Sundays are quiet. Sundays are chill.

Sundays are my favorite day at work because nothing ever happens on a Sundays.

My son works with me on the weekends, so we were a little surprised at all the stuff that went on today, especially with one of the tenants in our facility – that we’ll call “Nick”.

I’m not going to sit here and get into the whole thing because we dealt with Nick for HOURS – at different times today – and once we thought all was quiet again – Nick would start things up again. My son and I were the only staff working today, and with over 60 tenants in the building – it can become a lot. It can get stressful, overwhelming and crazy, especially if there’s so much going on at one time – like today.

I will say that Nick was having issues with his girlfriend and another guy that his girlfriend may – or may not – be seeing behind his back, so Nick decided to down a huge bottle of Vodka and start acting out – right in the facility we work in. Right in the lobby.

Thankfully – nobody else was in the lobby, because when Nick came to us and said he needed to talk and we knew he was very much angry and drunk – we were able to deal with him in private and with nobody else watching what was going on, or being nosy.

When Nick said he needed to talk, I asked if he wanted to talk to my son (man to man), or me. He said he didn’t care. My son went to the lobby and talked with Nick for a bit, and a few moments later – I heard something hit the window and saw a guy who looked like my son – standing on the other side of the building in the lobby – and his arm was up like he just threw something.

I thought he threw a punch.

I thought Nick attacked my son and my son was fighting back.

I jumped up and ran to the lobby – only to thankfully find out Nick had just thrown a can of pop that busted all over, and my son was standing behind him trying to calm him down.

I told my son to take over in the office, and I watched as Nick turned and punched the wall.

I stood right in front of him, made him look me in the eyes, and I grabbed his hands.

“You CANNOT lose your housing or your freedom and both of those will happen if you don’t cut it out! Nick, no woman is worth this and she’s not the only one out there. If she’s trying to make you jealous, or you’re acting like this because she’s throwing another man in your face, she’s not the one for you! You’re going to end up in jail – or out on the streets again if you get kicked out of here, and she’s still going to be warm, eating good – with a place to live still. Is that what you want?”.

I gave him a little speech and tried talking common sense into him – while still holding on to his hands.

He said no.

He also said a lot of other things that worried me, and after all the different situations that happened with him today, we had a long and serious talk after the 3rd issue he caused.

At one point, the police had to be called. Actually, I called for the paramedics, and dispatch sent the police instead.

When they walked in – I met them in the hallway.

Officer A smiled this adorable, beautiful smile and asked, “How’s it going?”.

Me: It’s been a day already, and I just got here a few hours ago. You single?

No, I didn’t ask if he was single, but he was such a beautiful man, I was tempted. lol.

Officer B. wasn’t bad looking, either.

Both officers had me take them to Nick’s room, and they dealt with him.

After they left, I had my son laughing so much when I said that even though it’s been a wild day so far – dealing with everything going on with others, and then all the stuff with Nick – I totally didn’t mind some eye candy that early in the morning. He said for my birthday, he’s just going to rent me a room next year and hire two male strippers dressed like cops. He laughed even more when I told him I want the real thing. I don’t want a fake cop. 😁

Seriously though, I don’t know what will happen with Nick after today’s madness, but I pray for him and just hope he can work out his issues.

Part of working in any field that has to do with those who were once homeless, are criminals, violent, or have drug / alcohol issues – is that you support them, show love and compassion, respect them, and do what you can to calm them down, keep them calm, etc.

So, today – while Nick was looking for something else to punch after I let go of his hands, I told him, “NO!”, and asked if he needed a hug. He looked at me for a few moments – sadness in his eyes, and I opened my arms to him – giving him the biggest teddy bear hug!

Mental health is a real thing that needs love, and compassion – and I know this man has mental health issues. Mix alcohol in there, and it becomes a scary and dangerous combination. Once he got that hug, and I had this serious talk about his housing, how he should want to act to keep it, and not wanting to go to jail over this girl – we were able to sit down in the lobby and have an hour-long conversation, and he was able to remain calm the rest of the day.

I have seen both – the good and the bad sides of Nick.

He can really be such a cool guy sometimes.

Just yesterday – I was in the office, and he came up to the office window – pointing two nerf guns at me.

He started shooting the window and laughed. He said he got them for $10, and he was having fun.

I joked and told him, “I WANT TO PLAY!”.

He handed one to me.

We had fun.

Today, he also fell on his ass. Slid on ice outside, and when I went out there and asked if he really just fell, he laughed about it and said he broke his butt. So, he has a good side to him. He has a funny side.

Today, when he was finally calm after many hours of anger – we were sitting on the armchairs in the lobby talking, and he apologized to me for the cops being there. I joked that he did me a favor because I was able to see some “eye candy” so early in the morning. He looked at me, smiled and told me, “SSSSSHHHUUUTTT UPPPPP!”. lol. I did tell him I was expecting the medics after the issue he caused in his room – but the cops showed up instead, so they weren’t there because I wanted them to be. I wanted the medics for him.

He really is a good guy, but again – when you mix anger, mental health issues and liquor – it can go bad – fast! That’s what happened today. All day.

Still, I love my job.

I love that when these beautiful people need someone who cares – I can be there.

*****

Have you seen the movie “DANGEROUS MINDS?” – with Michelle Pfeiffer???

She works with bad ass teenagers and she’s trying to make them WANT to learn. WANT to change their lives.

At one point in the movie – one of them ask her why she even cares and says something about her just being in it for the money. She makes a comment back like, “I make a choice to care, and honey – the money isn’t that great!”. Something like that.

Today – one of my other tenants I see every day – was upset because I wouldn’t give him his alcohol portion since he hasn’t been eating much. I refused, and he’s just not used to that – coming from me. As soon as I walked in this morning, he smiled big – greeted me at the door – and yelled, “There she is!”. Why? He thought he was getting alcohol as soon as I walked in.

Nope. I told him he had to eat breakfast first.

He was upset.

I told him I heard he hasn’t been eating much, and I can’t have him living off alcohol portions.

I’ll tell you what he didn’t do.

He didn’t yell at me like he yells at anyone else.

He was respectful, but he did ask me why I even care. He said nobody gives a shit about him and then he says, “All of you just want the money”. I did that Michelle Pfeiffer comment and told him, “I make a choice to care, and honey – the money isn’t that great!”. I meant it, too! The money is nothing to brag about. It sucks – honestly, but I love my job, and I care so much about each one of the people who live in this facility.

I love seeing all of them daily – and joking around – making them smile – getting a laugh out of them because they know I try to be funny and make their day better. I use humor with all of them, and many of them enjoy that and joke right back.

Recently, I received a (Certificate of Appreciation) award from work. I was thrilled.

This made me smile and made me feel good.

I do make the choice to care – even if it’s just a paycheck for others.

I do give a shit, and I’ll continue – until I move and no longer work there.

Today – a few of the tenants planned to walk to the liquor store right when lunch started.

I knew they hadn’t eaten and I asked three of them if they grabbed lunch.

They said no.

I told them to march their butts to the kitchen before they go out in the ice and snow and take that long walk.

Guess what they did?

Agreed they’d better get lunch, and they all walked to the kitchen – where my son was handing out lunches.

One of them laughed when I joked that I feel like they’re all my “adult children!”. 😁

It has totally been a wild day. I’m exhausted. I work early again tomorrow, and while being single is great – sometimes, I do wish I had someone to come home to – to hand me a glass of wine, listen to me talk about all of this instead of writing it all to get it off my chest, and someone to massage my feet or shoulders – while he listens to me vent.

Thank all of you for listening to me vent though! Or – reading. 😶

I just had dinner. I’m going to cuddle up in bed and possibly listen to some music before I fall asleep.

💕Shel💕

Back in 1982 and the Pros and cons of work recently.

Back in 1982 and the Pros and cons of work recently.

Shel R.14 Comments
Daily writing prompt
Share what you know about the year you were born.
View all responses

I haven’t done one of these WP prompts for a while, so here we go.

I will honestly say I don’t know much about the year I was born – except that all of my family was all still alive, healthy and so close. That has since changed, many of have passed, and family no longer gets together like they used to.

So, I had to look up some fun facts, wild history events, etc. that happened in 1982 – (the year I was born), and found these interesting facts.

I had no idea Nicki Minaj and Lil Wayne were born in the same year, but that was interesting to learn.

I listen to Nicki here and there, but I’m a huge fan of Lil Wayne and his songs. (Especially his song MIRROR).

Those popular songs from 1982 – are all still amazing today. Physical, Survivor, I love Rock ‘N Roll – they all still play on the radio, and my grandma Ann LOVED Katherine Hepburn, so it was nice reading all of this.

Reading what things costs back when I was born – had me shocked. Everything was so cheap.

I still owe $10,000 on my car, so to see that a car back then – fully cost $9,903 – makes me wonder what the hell happened that prices of new cars these days are $30,000 + if you want a BRAND new one in most places.

Mine was $30,000 – and I realize now that I could have gotten something bigger and a better, but I still love my car. It’s crazy expensive for no reason though. To think that I would have had it paid off by now if it were 1982 – blows my mind.

A house was $83,000 + ….and now, good houses are anywhere from $279,000 and up.

I’m just throwing average numbers out there, but houses are NOT cheap anymore.

Groceries have gone up like crazy since then.

Gas is up.

It’s sad to see how much times have changed. Even the music now – compared to 1982 – is sad.

I do giggle when I see that M*A*S*H. was one of the most popular T.V shows back then, because my mother hated that show, so whenever she watched her programs and that came on, we knew it was time to turn the T.V. off and do something else. My grandma watched that show and it was boring. However, my grandma LOVED the show DALLAS as well.

Michael Jackson released (Thriller), and E.T. became a popular movie.

I wanted to know more about what happened in 1982 because now I was curious, and I found this video.

That’s all I have.

There’s some history for you.

I could sit here and do more research, but I have to eventually get ready to take the kids to school and get to work. 😊

Today is the last day of school for the kids, and then Winter break starts.

I can’t believe we’re two days away from Christmas – which reminds me to order everything for Christmas dinner today.

I’m still shopping for gifts from “Santa” for the little guy, and stocking stuffers for the kids, and I’ll finally be finished. Of course, you know darn good and well that I plan to get myself a bottle of wine, and enjoy the last gift wrapped tomorrow night. I’m off work tomorrow and Christmas day, thankfully!

Yesterday, we took gifts to Elijah’s teachers, his Kindergarten teacher from many years ago, and his 2nd grade teacher. I mentioned that his 1st grade teacher moved out of state, but his past teachers loved his gifts, and they were so happy. Elijah was so happy to give gifts. He’s like me. He enjoys seeing people happy. ❤️

My car goes in for service today, and I’m praying it’s just a simple fix.

I think that’s all the life updates I have.

🙄

At work – we lost a woman I became close to. She was an alcoholic, and she knew her liver was failing, but she continued to drink. She was one of the tenants at the facility I work in.

I remember when I first met her. I’ll call her “Shannon”.

She was feisty. She was playful and fun, and she put her fists up acting like she was ready to fight.

We laughed about, and ever since that day a few months ago – I always called her “my homegirl”, or “my girl”. I’d tell her boyfriend – (who also lives in the facility) – not to come downstairs without my girl. So, he’d go back and get her. We used to make each other laugh and she was such a sweet firecracker. She didn’t take no shit.

We do portions at work – for some of the tenants – where we give small bits of alcohol, so they don’t deal with the withdrawals, and there was one time I had to deny her the portion she was supposed to get because when I breathalyzed her, she was over her limit. She made me giggle when she told me, “I don’t care! I got Vodka in my room”, and she strolled away, so me denying her – didn’t matter, but I knew at least – I was doing my job.

She was spunky, usually smiling or joking around, and happy.

I never expected that a few weeks ago, I’d be taking her to the hospital because she wasn’t doing well, and we’d have our very last conversation.

On the way to the hospital, we were talking and she said something about me having an accent.

I didn’t hear her, so I asked, “I have an accent?”. I knew she said something about one, but I didn’t know what. She yelled and replied with, “YOU DO! I SAID YOU DO HAVE AN ACCENT!”. And then – she apologized for yelling it and said she’s just in a lot of pain.

She ended up being released from the hospital and coming back to the facility about 2 weeks ago and she was so angry when she said her boyfriend offered her a drink. She denied it, because she didn’t want to die. She knew it was getting serious, and the next day after her release – she was right back in the hospital for the very last time.

Her boyfriend has been walking the halls in the facility, sitting at the front by the office, or coming down just to occupy his time, get his mind of her, and kept asking if she was going to be okay. Sunday, he came up to me and asked, “She’ll get better, right?”. I knew what I SHOULD have said, but my heart broke for him and I told him, “I’m not sure. All I can tell you is that she probably won’t be back here”. He said she has a lot of dreamcatchers, and he’d like his favorite one out of her room if that’s the case, so he could remember her. I asked our lead staff if we can do that for him, and I was given permission.

My son works with me on the weekends, so he went and made sure that on Sunday, her boyfriend was able to take his favorite dreamcatcher. I also asked our nurse if she could make him a copy of Shannon’s picture from her medication box, and the nurse was all for it. 💕🥺

Last night, one of my co-workers called me and said she’s helping our boss make phone calls.

I thought I was in trouble for something, but she told me she just wanted to let me know that “Shannon passed”.

I asked if her boyfriend knew yet, and she said after phone calls, she’ll be on her way to let him know.

We’ve been dragging it out for so long and not wanting to tell him the full extent of what we knew about her, and we tried to just ease his mind and tell him very little – but yesterday – we had to fully tell him like it is, and our nurse talked to him, told him the truth, and let him go to the hospital to say his goodbyes.

This shit is never easy, especially when you work in a facility or setting where you get to know everyone, get close to people, learn their stories, know they’ve had hard lives, and then see them go through things like this – or pass.

Last night when I found out, I sat in my bedroom and shed a few tears, and then whispered, “Fly high my girl!”.

I laugh – imagining her meeting God the same way she was the day I first met her – with her fists up, pretending to want to fight and saying, “Let’s go!”. lol. Just a little humor in this dark world – where we’ll all have our day eventually.

I pray for her family. I pray for her boyfriend who has been so lost without her. I pray for my co-workers who knew her much longer than I have, and for all those who loved her.

*****

Work is so rewarding, and I love my job, but it can also be stressful and sad at times.

Saturday, my son told me one of our other tenants was on the phone and she was in tears.

I found out one of her family members passed.

As she made arrangements to go with family for a few days, she sat and waited for hours for them to come and get her and her anxiety was through the roof. When she was leaving, I opened my arms to give her a big hug. She laughed when she said she smelled like shit because she hasn’t showered yet. I told her in a funny way, “I don’t give a damn! Come give me a hug Stinky butt!”. We hugged so tight and I asked her to please take care of herself and be good while she’s gone.

I know it’s so easy for these amazing men and women to relapse when times are tough like this, or to do something stupid they may regret because they’re not fully thinking, and I hate the times I have to watch them go through things that life throws at them – when they’re already dealing with the choices they’ve made and the positions they’re in now. 💔

On the plus side – when I can make them smile, laugh, or feel like someone cares – that makes me feel good, and I love doing what I can for them.

One of the women there told me that her cat was out of food, and I know she didn’t want to tell anyone or burden anyone with it, so she kept coming to the office to get some of our Chicken packs. I went and got her cat some treats and food, and we both laughed so much when she said treats are like a drug to that cat and I asked if this means I’m her cats “drug dealer now”.

Another woman I’ve gotten close to – keeps asking for this one Maroon Puma hoodie I have because she loves it so much. I joke with her and tell her she’s not getting my hoodie, and I love it, too! Yesterday at work, I had a piece of paper that fell into my sleeve, so I took my arm out of the sleeve to shake it out and she was standing by me. She got happy and thought I was going to take the hoodie off and give it to her. 🤣 This is the second time I’ve worn it there and she tried to get it.

I love the hoodie, but today – when I go in – I am going to hand it over to her.

It’s the little things, and if I can put a smile on their faces, I’ll do what I can. If it makes their day a little brighter, I’m all for it.

I’m going to miss that hoodie! 😶 Still, her happiness will be worth it.

This is why I say Kindness is so important.

I’d love to sit here and write more, but it’s time to make sure the kids are ready for school and for me to get ready for work.

Pray that my car issues is a simple fix – as my son will be dropping me off at work and taking my car in, and that Christmas hurries up because I’m almost ready to get it over with. ha.

Love ya!

💕Shel💕

Deadlines met, more money spent, Senior assassin plans, and work.

Deadlines met, more money spent, Senior assassin plans, and work.

Shel R.2 Comments

You have to have humor in life, right?!

Good morning and let me make you laugh a bit.

I dropped off my little guy at school this morning and as I was driving around the block to drop my daughter off at the high school, she said her friend wanted a ride. I swung around to get her friend and parked in the high school parking lot.

Me: I am absolutely down to look at LIFE 360 and do a drive-by or five on the days that I don’t work.

My daughter started naming her friends, and says, “We can all jump out of the car, do our thing, and jump back in. You’re the get-away driver!”. We laughed about it, and we laughed even more when my daughter’s friend says, “I feel like I’m listening to something I shouldn’t be involved in. I’m out of here!”. Her friend was laughing as she got out of the car, knowing what I was talking about.

We were talking about SENIOR ASSASSIN!

The class of 2026 has been planning it the last few days, taking votes on if they want to do water or gel pellet guns, and my daughter is so excited to be a part of this. 🤣 This is a game played in many states all over the world – where Seniors go around shooting their fellow Senior classmates with either water or gel pellet guns – in order to “assassinate” or eliminate each other.

There are only two rules.

They can’t get each other on school grounds, or – at one of their places of employment.

Anywhere else – is fair game.

They are currently voting on if they should all download LIFE 360, add each other to it, and have fun knowing where certain classmates are – to go get them.

When my daughter went on her Senior class trip a few months ago, she brought herself a very small water gun to have fun with, and I looked at her funny when she said she’s going to use that if they decide on water guns – for Senior assassin. I told her she better let me take her to the store and buy her a couple of huge SUPER SOAKERS! We both laughed and I told her, “Go big or go home!”. 😁

In all seriousness, my daughter hates social situations, and she doesn’t like to be around a lot of people because of her anxiety, so I am so happy she’s excited about this, and plans to participate. I was totally joking about the “getaway driver” thing – (unless other parents are participating as well), and then I’m totally down for it. ha. She’s been talking about it for days now, as all of the Seniors try to figure out what they want to use, when they plan to start it, and how it’s going to go.

We also just turned in all of her Yearbook deadline stuff.

The photo of her when she was little:

This will be in the Yearbook I believe, but also on the screen at graduation as they show the “then and now” photos of the class of 2026.

We turned in her Senior photo she picked for the Yearbook – after taking tons of photos the past few weeks. She and I both loved this one:

She turned in her Senior wills, which says what she’ll leave behind and to whom.

She said she was going to leave her Sassiness to her best friend, Riley – and her Silliness to her good friend, Logan.

She turned in her 10-year prophecy, which is where she sees herself in 10 years, and she said in 10 years, she’ll be saving lives as a Paramedic, living in California – hopefully with a few dogs. 🥰

She also had to turn in a Senior quote that goes under her Senior photo in the yearbook, and as we sat at the kitchen table searching for the perfect quotes or one that she liked, I cried like a baby.

I’m not ready for this! 🥺🤣

We went through many quotes, and each one just made me cry more.

Hers is, “We leave behind a trail of laughter, love, and a little bit of craziness”, and then she added, “Thank you for all the laughs“.

It was cute. It was simple. It works!

With everything turned in and deadlines met finally – I THOUGHT I was finished, but parents of Seniors know – that we are NEVER finished when we think we are. Yearbooks have to be paid for, and class rings have to be picked out and purchased.

Graduation outfits have to be shopped for – be it a tux for the Senior boys, or for us girl parents – dresses.

More money is involved, and it’s never ending – all the way up until graduation day, when we can finally sit back – relax and watch all of our hard work – pay off – as our Seniors walk the final walk – and get their diplomas. ❤️

AND THEN – IT’S MORE MONEY and it doesn’t end there because most of them will go on to college and need all kinds of new things. lol. Are we ready Senior parents?!!!!!!!

So, we’re almost done with Senior year, and all the madness and fun that comes along with it, and I’ve started getting emails for colleges, scholarships, grants, different financial stuff for her when she does go to college. She’s been getting different college packages in the mail as well – with colleges wanting her to come check out their schools.

She has decided on the University of Michigan, but I told her not to limit her choices to just one, and to check out multiple colleges before making any decisions, depending on if she still wants to do Paramedic or not – next year.

*****

My little guy just also had his Christmas concert, and it was only 20 minutes long.

I was surprised because in the recent years, it’s been longer, but it was still cute and fun.

He was one of the dancers, and he danced with a little girl. I wish I could upload videos here, but I would have to upload them to YouTube and grab them from there – and that’s a whole headache. He did a great job, though!

It broke my heart a little because it was his very last Christmas concert at this school, and I believe if all goes well – we’re moving next year, so it’s bitter-sweet to see my daughter almost ready to graduate from this school, and my son do his last concert here.

This school has been wonderful, and it’s sad to leave it, but we’re on to new adventures next year.

*****

As for me, I’ve just been working and enjoying my down time when I can.

I love my job!

Despite working in a facility that houses some of the roughest people and helping them get through some of their toughest times, I enjoy it and anything I can do to put a smile on their faces, or make them feel like someone cares – I’ll do it.

The amazing and popular rapper (Eminem) has a song called “Houdini”, and in the middle of it, he says, “F*** my own kids! They’re brats!”. His daughters are grown now – (one his own and the other two being adopted by him when they were little), and I thought it was the cutest thing when the video shows them on the phone / Facetime – acting shocked when he says that. It was pretty funny.

After that song came out, the internet and TikTok went crazy with his daughter, Hailey Jade – and others doing the sound that says, “I’m like, what’d he say F*** me for?”. It came from 50 cent from what I heard, but everyone used it as a joke to the Houdini song.

So, at work last week – I walked in super early and one of the older guys who live in the facility (Donny) I’ll call him – wanted something he usually gets at 8 AM – earlier. Sometimes, if I’m there early, I don’t see a big deal in giving it to him early because he’s a good guy and he behaves well. Sometimes – if one of our picky lead staff members are there, I just can’t do it. So, on this one day – he was down there, and he was yelling about how he’s tired of being treated like he’s a kid, and he was angry that one lead staff wouldn’t give him what he wanted, so he threw a fit.

He yelled, “F*** ALL OF YOU!”. I was working. My son was working. The one lead staff we try to avoid – was working. Later on, she walked away, and I called him downstairs to get what he was looking for and told him that he knows I always give him what he asks for, as long as I’m there and I can do it. I told him he didn’t need to yell at me when he knows I do what I can for him, and he apologized, so – I made him laugh when I said, “I’m like, what’d he say F*** me for?” – in the same tone TikTok uses for that sound.

We both laughed as he walked away.

We have another guy I’ll call “Bobby”. Bobby can be tough to deal with if he’s not sober, and sometimes he’ll listen, sometimes – he’s just ready to throw insults, punches, whatever he can. When he’s sober, he’s a decent guy to talk to.

At work a few weeks ago, my boss asked me to hand out Christmas wish lists for our tenants to fill out – for things they want for Christmas. Everyone turned theirs in over the last few weeks – except Bobby, so I planned to chase him down a few days ago – to see if he could turn his in. I didn’t have to though, as he came to the front desk and handed me his.

I opened it and it said he didn’t want anything for himself. Just a 1/2 dozen roses for his lady, Mary.

I thought that was the cutest, sweetest thing – but then again, there’s time where one of us staff members have to go break up arguments between him and Mary, and they have this weird, funny Love / hate relationship. Still, they both make me smile when they’re together and they both pick on each other and have their little arguments.

I don’t have favorite tenants, but one of my funniest ones – is a guy I’ll call Tony. He’s hilarious. He’s full of energy and I think I talked about him before. The one who made me my flower vase when I first started at this facility. I forgot what I called him back then, but for this – I’m calling him Tony.

I watch the cameras sometimes, and I’ll see him on one – and then next thing I know – he’s 10 cameras over, and I’m wondering how he got to the other side of the building so fast.

The other day, he had me laughing – as I watched him do laundry for FIVE entire hours. FIVE – because he was taking his sweet time folding his clothes so carefully, hanging them, cleaning the washers and dryers, and doing other things in the laundry room. Trying to fix the sink, picking things up from the floor, cleaning the floor, and things he didn’t go in there to do.

Not to mention that he left his breakfast on the water fountain, and someone else started eating off of his plate, so I had to bring it into the office to hold it for him, while Mr. “Take other people’s food” – walked around looking for where the plate went – that he was stealing off of, and I watched that on the cameras as I giggled to myself.

I love these people.

I’ve grown to know all of them. They’ve grown to know and trust me, and also my son when he’s there on the weekends, and I love working in this facility. Every day brings new laughter, new adventures here, and a lot of times when I’m looking for ways to make their life easier, their days brighter, and joke with them to give them laughter.

They’ve been through a lot!

In a world where society and the town judge them and knows all of the negative things about the people who live in this facility, I like to find the good in all of them, see the positivity they hold, and get to know them on a personal level. My job isn’t just for a paycheck. It’s to show these people that in a world full of hate and judgement, I’m not one of those people who do that. I care.

I will say that I pissed off one of the tenants yesterday and I can cross that off my “to-do” list. lol.

Just kidding. I don’t have a to-do list that states, “Piss of a tenant”, but I thought it was a funny thought.

She was angry that she felt like someone stole her laundry, but upon checking the cameras, I didn’t see anything and asked if she is sure she didn’t grab her laundry on another day and forget. I can honestly say that I was NOT her favorite staff member – as she screamed at me the 4th time she came and told me about her clothes missing, and that someone in the building stole them.

After she screamed at me and walked away, I knew I just had to let it roll off my shoulders, and that it was nothing personal. I knew that I wasn’t the first staff member she had went off on, and I won’t be the last. She’s one of our very much louder tenants, and when I’m at work, I try to be as polite with her as possible, get her whatever she needs, and call it a day.

I’ve learned all of their personalities, their flaws, their likes and dislikes, the ones you can joke with and the ones we kind of just have to say, “What do you need?” – take care of and keep it moving with.

On the plus side, I just found out that one of our other tenants that I’ll call Bryce – knows how to play songs on the Harmonica. That was pretty cool, and while he was a little tipsy yesterday, he knew I had this big project I was working on for my boss, and he stood by the front desk, played songs on the Harmonica, and it was actually nice.

I enjoyed listening to him as I did this project, and it was soothing.

Everyone I deal with there on a daily basis – I have grown to love, care about, and respect because they’re still standing. They still keep going, and they try their best to get through another day – no matter what cards in life they’ve been dealt. ❤️

*****

In other news – my car is an a-hole, and I’ve been trying to see if I can trade it in for a family SUV.

There’s something going on with my throttle, or sensors – whatever I’ve read on it, and I’ll be taking it to the shop next week to see what’s going on. I joked that my car is going to throw me into a brick wall – because it keeps doing this thing where it feels like it wants to accelerate by itself when my foot isn’t even on the gas, and sometimes – it feels like it wants to give up.

I did call a dealer this morning because I used to have a Ford Explorer and I absolutely LOVED IT, so I did tell the guy if one comes in – let me know. He gave me his cell phone number and told me that when I have a down payment ready, to come on in and he’ll take care of me. We ran some numbers, and he asked if I was looking for a Tahoe, Escalade, etc. I did tell him I don’t want anything huge, but I do need something bigger than what I have now, and I am looking to trade in my a-hole car. 😁

Christmas is almost here. I still have to buy gifts from Santa to the little dude, and hopefully early next year, I can trade this car in for something else. Until then – it’s going to keep being an a-hole, and I’m going to keep buying scratch-off tickets and hope I win big on one of them.

haha. Joking.

Love ya!

❤️Shel❤️

When sshhhh goes wrong… and a great Christmas movie.

When sshhhh goes wrong… and a great Christmas movie.

Shel R.Leave a comment

A few nights ago, I couldn’t sleep.

A friend of mine had told me about a cute movie she watched and wanted me to check out, so – since I couldn’t sleep and she knows I like different Christmas movies around this time of year, I watched the one she suggested.

I’m not sure if it’s streaming anywhere else, but I watched it on YouTube.

It seemed like a Hallmark movie, and I’m not really a Hallmark movie – kind of gal, but I actually like this movie.

You have to pay attention to really know what’s going on, but I recommend it if you’re looking for something cute to watch. ❤️

It has some great actors / actresses, such as Paul Walker and Robin Williams (God rest their souls), Susan Sarandon, Penelope Cruz, Chaz Palminteri, and others.

Paul Walker plays a super jealous and controlling cop, who doesn’t want any man around his fiancé or even looking at her, and she’s ready to leave him if he doesn’t change his crazy ways. She truly does love him and wants everything to work out – especially because it’s Christmas, and she doesn’t want to leave him during Christmas.

Susan Sarandon’s mother is battling Alzheimer’s / Dementia and won’t eat, and while she loves spending time with her mom every year, things are getting worse, and it’s become an awful Christmas for her – watching her mother go through all of this, as she watches the man across the hall from her mother’s room – fight for his life.

There’s an elderly man in this movie who is obsessed with Paul Walker’s character and at first – the movie makes it seem likes he’s gay and wants to be with “Mike” – (Paul’s character), but that’s not the case at all, and it made me cry when I found out why he’s so obsessed with Mike.

What Mike does for this man to heal his heart and soul – teaches him something about himself and his own jealousy and the way he’s acting with his fiancé.

The movie is good. I’d watch it again.

So, when I couldn’t sleep a few nights ago, that’s what I watched, and I enjoyed it.

If you watch it, let me know what you think.

*****

In other news, my son and I had our very first work meeting this week.

I work all week long and on the weekends. My son just works the weekends with me, but this meeting was mandatory for most staff.

We got updates on some of our tenants in the building. We got updates on whatever we needed to know. We talked about different things, the work Christmas party next week, things that need to be done during shifts, and so on.

Staff was able to voice our thoughts, ideas, concerns, etc.

My son and I stayed quiet because again, this was our first meeting since working at this facility and we just wanted to take it all in, see what goes on in these meetings, and who says what.

One thing that did make me want to speak up and go against something – was when one of my older co-workers said something about possibly putting up a sign that says nobody can hang out in the hallways because she’s tired of kicking people out of the halls, and nobody listens. They keep doing it anyway. If there’s a sign saying they can’t – maybe, they’ll finally understand it.

I disagreed with that because it’s winter. It’s freezing outside, and sometimes the weather is -10, -20, -30 – out here, and kicking people out in the cold, just doesn’t sit right with me. It’s not the kind of person I am and it’s not the way my heart is. Not to mention that while I’m on my shift, or my son and I are both working together – we don’t care if people are hanging out in the hallways because they’re safe, they’re warm, and they live in the building – WE DON’T! So, for us to kick them out of any part of their home – when we just work in this facility – doesn’t sit right with us.

I wanted to say all of that, but I didn’t.

I knew that if my boss agreed to put a sign up saying they can’t hang out in the hallways, and we still let them – (because I was still going to let them), it would be mixed signals because different staff let them do different things, and we wouldn’t all be on the same page.

Here’s the thing.

The facility I work in – as I said before – houses people who are homeless or were once homeless before they were accepted into this facility. It’s a big building and they each have their own little apartments.

This facility houses not only homeless people, but also alcoholics and those with drug addictions, and mental health issues. This facility houses some criminals who committed different minor crimes and have nowhere to go after their release, or those who have no family / friends to go to. We have people from all walks of life in this facility, and they lean on each other. They’re friends with each other. They enjoy hanging out with and seeing each other, because for some of them – the people who live there, are all they have.

The problem is – there’s two sides to this huge building.

There’s the side where the tenants are more independent, can work, go do whatever they please, come and go, etc. as long as they stay out of trouble and follow the rules of their leases, and of the facility. Then, there’s the side where people are more dependent, need alcohol portion control, are dealing with withdrawals, dealing with mental health things, and just need more care, and compassion.

The staff office – is right in the middle of both sides, so both sides can come and talk to the staff, or get what they need, but both sides are locked – and these tenants know that one side can’t go to the other sides lobby. So they call each other from the lobby phones, meet outside, or – in these hallways they have right by the office if it’s cold outside like it has been.

During the meeting, when my older co-worker asked if a sign can be placed, I was so happy when my boss said she’s on the fence about doing that, and she feels different about it.

She said as long as they’re not causing problems, fighting or drinking in the hallways, and as long as they’re not blocking the way to get in and out – it doesn’t bother her. She said she would much rather have them hanging out in the hallways safe and warm – than to be out and about wherever they’ll find to go to be warm and hang out and possibly get into trouble while they’re out and about.

She said she’d rather deal with them in the halls, than having the police calling the building saying, “Hey, you need to come get your guy”, or have one of them out and about drinking, and freeze to death.

I absolutely agreed with my boss, and I loved that she spoke up and said something because I was on the same page as my boss.

I was happy when the Case manager chimed in and said a sign probably wouldn’t matter anyway, because many of the people who live in the facility have had a “F*** You” attitude since they were little, and all they’re going to do – is become combative and give attitude if there’s a sign. They’re doing that now if they get kicked out of the hallways. So, it’s probably not even worth it.

I agreed with that as well.

It’s all about picking and choosing your battles and kicking them out of hallways of somewhere THEY LIVE – as I said – it’s not right.

I also wanted to speak up when one of the lead staff – said something about how people also aren’t allowed to be in the hallways if they don’t live here and just want to come in to warm up because they live on the streets. She said if that’s the case, they have TWO MINUTES to warm up, and get out, or – we can “slowly” help them fill out a housing application, and then – they have to go.

Part of me so badly wanted to kind of joke – but kind of seriously tell her, “You better hope you get into heaven when you die, and God doesn’t just give you TWO MINUTES to look around and tell you that you have to go!”.

I was so mad. I couldn’t believe how heartless she sounded. I wish I would have said something, but again, I didn’t, because I knew I wasn’t going to follow her TWO MINUTE RULLE anyway, and I was so proud of my boss and so happy when she spoke up again and said for her – it would be different.

She said for her being a human – she knows what she would want someone to do for her if she were in that same position, and if someone comes in off the streets to get warm, she will treat them like another human. She said she wouldn’t care if they slept in the hallways if that meant they have a warm place to be – even for one night. She said she’d offer a pair of warm gloves, a hat, whatever we have for whenever they want to leave, and one of my other co-workers mentioned giving them a cup of hot coffee.

YES!!!!!!

That’s how it should be!!!!!

If I’m ever at work and a homeless person comes in and needs to warm up, I’m grabbing that cup of coffee for them, having them sit down by our heaters, pulling up a chair next to them, and letting them keep me company as we chat, because I don’t have the heart for that “TWO MINUTES” crap. My boss said she’d much rather get in trouble by the higher up’s or whoever – for being a good person, than to have to treat another human like they’re below her, and I loved that!

Same.

Last week – I gave some of our “good gloves” at work to a few of the people who live there, and my son said something about how he thinks they’re Christmas gifts for those who ask for it on their wish lists.

First of all – gloves should not be on a WISH LIST. They should automatically be given out because that’s something that’s NEEDED in this weather, so if those gloves sitting in the closet were for the wish list – and I get in trouble for giving them out to people who NEED them, I’ll deal with that and take it with a smile.

My boss said in the meeting – that she’d back us up no matter what we decided to do in any situation, and that we have to use our best judgements and our common human sense. If I get in trouble for letting people hang out in the hallways to stay warm and safe, O-well. If I get in trouble for doing good things for people who live there, O-well. If I get in trouble if some homeless person comes in off the streets and wants to sleep in the halls to stay warm – O-well.

I know my boss will back me up, and that’s what matters. She has the same good heart I do.

I was bothered that this other lead staff literally sat there joking about her little TWO MINUTE rule, and they have to go. She had a smile on her face and said if they don’t live here, they don’t belong there and that’s it.

My face while she was talking – was something like:

My son tried not to laugh because he knew I was mad.

It takes ZERO EFFORT OR DOLLARS to be a good human being, and she doesn’t seem like she’s it.

After the meeting, I shared my concerns with my boss and I let her know – one on one – that I’m not kicking nobody out if they need to get warm, and that I don’t care who hangs out in the hallways if they’re not fighting, drinking or causing issues. She agreed with me, and again – I’m glad she backs me and the idea of being a good person – up.

I can’t promise I’ll stay quiet in future meetings, but I will say that from now on – I plan to stand up for what’s right and what’s wrong.

I love my job, and when it comes to rules and policies, I’ll follow them to an extent. When it comes to being a good person, helping others, showing love – compassion and kindness – I’ll bend the rules and policies if I have to, and I won’t apologize for it. 😶 There’s some circumstances where it’s okay to say, “We’re not supposed to do this, but….”.

So, my son and I survived our first work meeting – despite me having to bite my tongue and stay quiet on certain things I disagreed with or wanted to speak up on.

*****

On my side of this small little town, I’m just working, counting down the months until my daughter graduates’ high school and we can move.

I’m starting to get rid of things we don’t use, need or want – so packing will be faster and a little easier, and trying to STILL get graduation photos done, things turned in on time for her deadlines, etc. We’ve done some graduation photos, and she doesn’t like them, so we’re going to try again this weekend and by Tuesday of next week, everything should be turned in for the yearbooks and deadlines.

That’s a lot, right?! MAMA NEEDS A FEW NAPS. ha.

Today is my little guy’s Christmas concert at school and I’m looking forward to that.

He told me if I cry, he’s just going to “pretend” to sing, and not really sing. lol.

I work this weekend. I work next week. We were supposed to go to Illinois the end of this month for a few days to be with family, but I have things to do, to catch up on, and I just can’t.

Besides all of that….

Let me share how awesome my older son is!

I had to run to the store yesterday for a new pair of jeans and a new pair of shoes.

He offered to pay for my shoes. I told him I have the money, and he replied with, “I know, but I wanted to get you a Christmas gift from Amazon, and it won’t arrive on time, so let me just buy you the shoes you want”. I told him I wasn’t getting anything fancy right now because it’s winter, but he insisted – so, I let him. He called it my early Christmas gift, and I’m okay with that. 😁❤️

He really is a great kid!

After we ran to a few stores and grabbed Starbucks, we were on the way home and I felt my car driving a little bumpy. I pulled over and asked my son to check my tires, and when he did – he shook his head.

I knew I had a flat. I was so irritated because I’m a single mom. It’s almost Christmas. I have other things to buy or pay, and now I have to get a new tire on top of it???!!!

I couldn’t help it, and I was so stressed, drained and irritated – that I cried.

I didn’t just cry. I sat in the car and sobbed. Big tears. I was a wreck.

I saw this a few weeks back and didn’t think much of it until yesterday when I needed a new tire – on top of everything else going on, and I thought about this again.

I just laid my head back on my headrest, looked up and wondered what the hell God is doing up there, and why I just can’t feel like I’m getting ahead of anything.

My son was calm.

He changed my tire to the spare, and I was able to make it to the tire shop I always go to whenever I need tire work done.

I’m pretty sure I need an alignment, but they couldn’t do it yesterday, so I have to go back and that’s even more money.

$167 I didn’t plan to spend on the tire, and just like that – more money gone.

You know what I want for Christmas? A F***IN’ DAY WHERE EVERYTHING IS PAID, I DON’T HAVE TO GO ANYWHERE, I HAVE A BOTTLE OF GOOD WINE, I’M BORED OUT OF MY MIND BECAUSE I HAVE NOTHING TO DO AND NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT, AND LIFE IS GOOD!

I’m sure that’s the wish of every single mama out there though.

Hell, I’m sure that’s the wish of every person dealing with anything right now.

Listen. I’m blessed that God still has me on this earth with my kids, and my other three kids here on this earth with me, so I can’t really complain.

Other than that, I don’t have much else going on right now.

I just dyed my hair.

I know I said I wasn’t going to do that.

My silver / gray was showing through my dark brown / black hair, and I wanted to see how it would look if I finally fully went silver / gray. My daughter said it looked pretty cool, but with my son’s Christmas concert in a bit, I decided to go in with cut hair and a new color. 😊

Have a beautiful day loves!

❤️Shel❤️