Tag: life

Confessions of a one-time “hater”. (Guilty), and some funny work stories.

Confessions of a one-time “hater”. (Guilty), and some funny work stories.

Shel R.2 Comments

So, I have a confession to make, and I’m a little embarrassed by it.

However – we grew through tough times and make mistakes – that teach us valuable lessons in life, right?

One of our lead staff members was demoted a month ago, and she ended up finding a new job, so her position was available.

She cleaned out her office, and she was on her way to her new job.

That means – her position was open, and anyone could apply.

I’m not sure who else did, but I know I did. I interviewed for it a few weeks ago.

My co-worker (who has only been there for three weeks) interviewed for it, and so did another co-worker at the last minute. The other co-worker was too young, so they didn’t think she’d be a good fit.

Other than those other two, I don’t know if there was anyone else who tried to get it, but my boss kept telling me she hasn’t decided yet and would let us know soon.

I got a call last week from the boss and she was beating around the bush, making small talk, and so slow about just telling me, “Hey, you didn’t get it”. She eventually got there, and she told me that I was such a strong candidate, and that – if any other lead staff position opened up – she’d let me know first.

She felt bad, but I told her it was totally fine, thanked her for calling and handled it with grace. I wasn’t mat at her, and while I was a little disappointed because the pay is better, and I could make my own hours – as well as having my own office to decorate – (which I’ve always wanted), I decided maybe there was something better out there for me.

I felt like she found someone more experienced – who qualified more than I did, and I was okay with that.

However, I then found out it was the co-worker who has only been there for three weeks – that got the lead staff position. That was promoted for that spot. That got the office I was so ready to take and decorate. That was about to do the job I was looking forward to learning and getting into.

The fact that she hasn’t even been there for that long bothered me, and I’ve been working my ass off for this facility, coming in when others can’t sometimes, and proving myself to my boss. Everyone there loves me, and I love everyone there. I get along with everyone, and this woman who just got there three weeks ago – gets promoted and gets to join lead staff! Um, excuse me……but what?!

Not only was I confused when I found out she got it, but then I was hearing from different people that it’s favoritism and what some told me was called (Nepotism). The act of favoring friends and family in professional, political, or business settings – rather than merit or those who deserve what those family and friends get.

Rumor had it that this woman who got the position – is a family member of my boss’s ex-husband. Of course, that didn’t sit well with me, but it made sense as to why she would get the position.

Still, it bothered me.

I congratulated her when I saw her. I tried to be happy for her and tell her I think she’d do well. I tried not to let it bother me in front of her.

Yesterday, I came into work, and she wasn’t supposed to be there. I walked in and she says, “There you are!”. Supposedly, she thought she had to work until 9 AM because someone told her I didn’t get in until 9 AM on weekdays. I told her that’s only on Fridays. I usually come in at 7 AM, and she decided to say since she’s punched in already, she may as well go check out her new office while she has the chance.

I’m sure she was trying to rub it in my face, and she knew I was looking to get that position, so I just kind of gave her a:

kind of look – smiled, and told her, “Sounds good!”.

I giggled when one of our other lead staff members whispered to me, “She’s not even supposed to be here or clocked in right now! Now, she’s checking out her office?”.

I wondered if she came in while I was working – just to do exactly what I felt like she was doing.

Throwing it my face.

She said 3 more times as she did random things around the main office – how she was going to check out her office. Okay, so go! Why do you keep mentioning it?! I didn’t say that though, but I did find it wild how she had to keep announcing it – like she was expecting a celebration or something.

I found it really hard yesterday to be happy for her, and I felt bad about it – but then again – I didn’t. I wanted to know what skills – what degrees – what knowledge she had – over me and why she was chosen instead of myself.

When I found out from her – that she’s a two-time felon, has court dates still coming up, is on years of probation for her Criminal activities, and has no degrees – my mind was so boggled. I couldn’t wrap my mind around it. Seriously – why – did my boss pick her over me?

I’m the one with two degrees in Criminal justice and no criminal history.

So, I felt some kind of way while I was sitting in the main office and trying to let it go.

Not to mention that as she was decorating her office or doing whatever she was doing on the other side of the building where it is – she kept going back and forth – walking in and out of – and through the main office where I was. There was no reason for it because all lead staff usually goes around the main office to get to either side, so her walking through it – irritated me a bit as she kept doing it, and then – doing my job for me as I was sitting there as well.

She kept reaching over me, going around me, and dealing with things I was supposed to be dealing with.

Do you want to decorate and check out your new office that you’ve mentioned multiple times now, or do you want to do my job and be in the main office – because you can’t do both!

Let me be fair and say that I woke up emotional yesterday because it was rainy, gloomy and cold outside, and my first thought when I woke up – was my oldest child who passed. Pain comes in waves, right? Yesterday, the waves came with the rain and it just hit me out of nowhere, so I cried a bit in the morning, and didn’t even want to go to work, but I knew I needed the money, and I dragged my ass out of bed – to the shower, back to the room to get dressed, to my car, and into work anyway.

Feeling emotional about my oldest and then dealing with this co-worker at work who I then find out has a criminal background, and all this other stuff going on, but got the job instead of me – it was a lot that early in the morning.

I made myself a cup of coffee, tried to ignore whatever she was doing or saying, and I tried to go on with my day as normal, but as I was sitting there talking to one of the residents who I’m so cool with – we were talking about if I got the job or not.

He knew I applied. I told him no, and I told him I didn’t know why, but we discussed the situation, and just like I’m always there for the residents in the facility I work in – I tried to do the same thing yesterday, but he ended up being there for me instead – as tears fell from my eyes.

You know those times you really want to cry, and you try so hard to hold it in, but they just do their own thing sometimes and flow? That’s what happened! As much as I tried to hold them in, they fell and I grabbed a tissue and quickly wiped my eyes.

I’ll call this guy “Paco”. Paco and I sat there talking for almost an hour and he kept telling me how wrong it was that I didn’t get it, especially because all the residents know that while many of the lead staff and others come to work for the money, there are three main people who go above and beyond and show that they really give a damn about the residents. Me, My son, and the nurse there.

He then told me, “Listen. I know how you’re feeling, but I just want you to know how proud I am of you right now. You didn’t get the position. Someone who shouldn’t have got it – got it – and you’re still here. You’re still standing. You’re still trying to be positive and show us so much love, and do your thing while you’re here, and I guarantee you – God has a plan!”.

He was telling me that there’s a high turnover rate in that place, and the way the place treats their best employees – is why they can’t keep their best employees. I told him I was hurt, angry, and that I love the residents so much, that I want to stay, but – there’s just some things that go on there that I don’t agree with, and this might have just pushed me over the edge to find something better.

He agreed with me and told me how he feels about that place, and how every time he tries to say something about whatever goes on there – they threaten to kick him out. He then told me he wouldn’t blame me if I left, but that he’d miss me and he would hope I left for something so much better because I deserve it, and I deserved that position.

I think what really got to me yesterday – was feeling like my college degrees and me having a clean background – meant nothing at that moment, and I needed to know why. Like all the hard work I’ve done in school for four years to earn my degrees and then working my ass off in this facility for a long time now – meant nothing, and it killed me knowing she has felonies, and only 3 weeks at the job – and she got it.

I’m just being totally vulnerable and honest right now.

I was not okay yesterday morning – emotionally or mentally – over not only my oldest – but over this situation as well, and it didn’t sit right with me.

Residents weren’t happy I didn’t get it.

One of our other lead staff was bothered I didn’t get it.

I just felt betrayed.

So, I eventually asked my boss if I could talk to her, and we went into her office.

I asked why it was given to this co-worker and how I felt about it because of her background and her time at the job, and my boss looked at me and asked if I wanted an honest answer, or what. Of course!

Did I get any real answers? No.

Instead, she sugar-coated it and told me that the rumors about the woman being related to her ex-husband are not true and she never saw her a day in her life – until she came to the job to apply. The face on other staff members faces when I said she denied knowing the woman – was hilarious, but it told me everything I think I know.

She then went on to say that she doesn’t think it’s the right role for me, and she sees me doing something so much higher, better – and that because I have my degrees and no criminal background – she “envisions” something else for me.

She stated that things are always changing at the company, so she wants to consider me for something in a higher-up position. She told me that one of the women who runs the buildings in different areas (there’s multiple) applied for a few different positions and was turned down, before she was finally offered a seat on one of the highest levels there is, and now she’s doing amazing and runs things.
Not to get discouraged.

She went on and on and tried to make me feel better, but I wasn’t okay with her answers, because she still wasn’t telling me what qualifications this other woman had – that would make her more qualified than myself.

And – as a boss – I guess she felt like she didn’t have to.

Do I believe they don’t know each other? No.

Still, I couldn’t do anything about it, so I simply told my boss I wasn’t feeling it yesterday, I was going home, and I asked her to be okay with that, and she was. She totally supported my decision to not be at work yesterday, and she had this co-worker of mine who was supposed to be busy checking out her office but kept walking through the main office – sit in the main office when I left, and this co-worker of mine – was not happy about it.

I did leave. I did take the day off yesterday, and I got my mind right, and pulled myself together.

I thanked Paco – one of our best residents there – for letting me have my bad day, and for talking me through it.

I thank my son – because sometimes – we’re each other’s voice of reason, and yesterday – he was mine.

He knew what happened and he told me:

“Mom, maybe it’s a blessing in disguise you didn’t get it. It seems like anything the boss doesn’t want to deal with – it goes to that side, and maybe our boss didn’t want you to have to take on that load. Maybe she knows the position is stressful, exhausting, and comes with a hell of a lot of responsibilities, and she didn’t want to give that all to you!”.

He said:

“Maybe she does have something else better and bigger in mind for you. Maybe someone is leaving and we don’t know about it yet, and she plans to put you in that position. Maybe there’s a reason you didn’t get this position and there’s something else out there for you that is going to pop up.

The universe knows what it’s doing, and you have to trust it. Look how stressed out and irritated our last Resident advocate was, and how she was more than happy to find something else, so you don’t think ol’ girl is going to be stressed out? Plus, she has to pick up all the days that someone can’t come in, and eventually – she’s going to be stressed out about that – and get tired of it! Take it as a blessing!”.

My kid made me smile the way he was trying to make me feel better and be that voice of reason.

Knowing I wasn’t going to get any real answers from my boss, I just left and made sure she was okay with me taking the day off. My son was using my car, so he came to pick me up when I called him, and we went to Starbucks – because I deserved it. ha.

I still felt like a big baby yesterday after I left.

I still felt like I was a “hater” yesterday, and I hate haters, so to feel like I was one yesterday – bothers me now, but I think I had every right to feel the way I did. No matter what.

And then – when I came home and really thought about it, I felt like maybe our boss put her in that position to help her. She’s on probation and she has court dates, so maybe our boss felt like it would look good in court coming up – if she got this promotion and she’s doing something as a lead staff member. My boss did say she believes in 2nd changes, and helping other people, so maybe that was her reason for giving it to her.

I’d like to think my boss knows my two degrees and no criminal history – is going to get me further than that position I wanted, but she knows that this woman needed all the help she could get, and helped her do anything to show the courts she’s on the right track, and if that’s the case – then I’m okay with it.

Everyone keeps saying this job is already going to this woman’s head, and that’s the one thing I can’t deal with. If you’re in a position of power – stay humble, because it could all be taken away so fast. Never think you’re above anyone, and as long as she stays humble, I have nothing else to say.

Do I feel like it should have been me? Yes.

But – maybe God knew she needed it more than I did.

I will also say that she could easily be bothered that I have two criminal justice degrees, and plan to become a probation officer if God allows it. She was going to school to become a probation officer before the felonies, and now – she has to do something different with her life, so maybe God knew I didn’t need the position because I have a wider range of career options, and she’s limited.

I trust God, and I don’t know fully why I wasn’t given it, but I do know I acted out of character yesterday, I’m truly sorry for it, and now – I feel like getting her a cute decoration / gift for her new office. 😘I’m always uplifting other woman, so the fact that I was a hater yesterday, I do feel guilty about it, and the fact that I went to my boss – I am embarrassed, but I needed to know why and I needed to get my feelings off my chest.

It made me giggle when she said it shows maturity that I’m able to come and sit down – talk with her and be respectful at the same time.

I mean – what was I going to do?

Go in there, yell, threaten her, throw things?! lol.

You know what that reminds me of? 🤣 If you’ve never seen the hilarious movie “GIRLS TRIP” – with Tiffany Haddish, Regina Hall, Queen Latifah, and Jada Pinkett Smith – you must!

Tiffany Haddish goes into her boss’s office to talk about her snack someone keeps taking out of the break room fridge and her behavior about it, and her boss tries to let her go, but she won’t accept that.

I wasn’t going to go into my boss’s office and misbehave or get crazy, and she wasn’t letting me go.

In fact, she told me they love me there and she hopes I still want to stay.

And –

Thank you, Starbucks – for being there for me in my time of needing you yesterday. 🤣I’m addicted to those damn Dubai Chocolate bites they have.

Listen.

I love my boss. I have nothing bad to say about her – even now.

She’s easier to talk to. She’s there when I need to talk. She’s understanding.

Not many bosses would let me say, “I’m not feeling this today. I’m leaving” and be totally fine with it, but she also understood why.

So, she made her decision, and it is what it is.

I don’t know if this co-worker of mine will be able to handle this job humbly, or with grace – or at all – because she already seems stressed out, but – I’m over being a hater, and I wish her the best, and hope that she enjoys her office and her new position.

I am rooting for her changing her life and doing bigger and better things because I believe in 2nd chances as well, and I do hope she’s amazing at her new position.

Maybe there is something bigger and better out there for me, and maybe my boss did think I was too good for this position and deserve more, but I’m just going to suck it up, continue to do my best, and come through for my residents – the way they expect me to. 💕

As for all of you out there – if you wanted that promotion or job you didn’t get – if you didn’t get into the college you wanted to get into, if you didn’t get picked for a sports team, If you didn’t get to take that trip you wanted to take – or whatever disappoint life throws at you – take it a blessing and know that God has something better in mind, and I trust that.

**********************

Besides that little bit of setback at work – let me share some funnies with you because a lot of you like my work stories! 😁

I have another co-worker who can both work my nerves and make me giggle sometimes.

She works in a different area of the building, so when she sneaks her way into the main office and sits down to chat with me for the longest – while I’m trying to do 10 other things – I joke with her and demand her back to her own area. She laughs about it, totally ignores me and continues to work my nerves – playfully.

I was leaning back in my chair relaxing with nothing to do one day last week, and she snuck in and shook the back of the chair, yelling – “Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!”. It’s a scene from FINDING NEMO in case you don’t know, and I yelled out, “FISHY! WHY ARE YOU SLEEPING?”.

We both laughed so much.

It may not have been exactly like we said it, but we both knew the references we were talking about, and we both got each other’s references right away.

Another day last week – she, one of the lead staff that I’ll call “Delilah”, and I – were in the main office talking. We had a day where there were cops in and out for different situations going on, so with one of the situations – this one tall, beautiful man (a cop) – had to come into the building, and then as he stood in the hallway, us gals drooled over him. 🤣

Delilah said she wants to ask him what she can do to get arrested, so he has a reason to touch her.

And – she’s lead staff! (I love our crew).

I had to laugh so much and joked with her to leave MY man alone. I asked if she wanted to fight for him. She says, “Hell yeah! Let’s go outside!”. I was leaving anyway because my shift was over, so she and I walked outside together, right past the cop as he dealt with the situation, and when he was done – she and I were standing by the curb talking – minding our business and he left.

The next day – my co-worker who works in the different area and likes to sneak into the office to annoy me – comes into the office and tells me, “I want that hot cop to come back. I saw you try to rub against him as he was leaving!”. I laughed and told her, “Um – I was just standing there! He brushed up against me!”.

It’s very true.

That cop was leaving that day, and I don’t know if he did it on accident or purpose, but I felt the side of him lightly brush up against my back as I stood there talking to my co-worker – Delilah. 😁

Point is – I adore many of my co-workers and I absolutely love this job – besides yesterday’s minor issue.

I love the residents as well, as I’ve mentioned.

So, we have a guy I’ll call “OG”.

OG loves coming to see me when I’m working and he always makes me laugh.

We joke around often. He’s an older guy in his late 50’s / early 60’s I believe, and over the weekend – he came down to the main office and asked me to look up the last name of his visitor. I joked that he’s letting people in without knowing their last names, and he smiled this big cheesy smile.

He said he met her at the Casino the night before and brought her back there.

One side of our building can have visitors outside only, and the other side – can bring visitors inside and up to their mini-apartments and he did that. I looked up the visitor log and told him the last name, and he says, “Thanks! I don’t want to get any one confused!”. PLAYER! 🙄🤣 He’s hilarious though!

For my residents – for this job I love – for the co-workers I admire and get along with so well – for the help I give, and they know I’ll go above and beyond for any of them – I’m going to continue to smile, to show up, to be there do the best damn job I can – promotions or not.

So, I confess that I was a one-day hater, I’m over it, I feel guilty about it, and we all go through it when life hands us disappointments, but again – maybe she feels the same way about me having two degrees and being able to do the job she also wanted to do in the future (probation), if I do get there.

I think sometimes – we all have a bit of envy in us, and it’s our job to let it control us or control it, and I decided to control it, be happy for her, and just be there if she needs anything – because she does deserve a 2nd chance and this will look good for her in court and being on probation – so I wish her well.

That being said – I’m out of here. 💕

XOXO.

🤗Shel🤗

I’m here.

I’m here.

Shel R.5 Comments

It has been a while.

I know! I know!

I’ve been so busy working, picking up extra hours, saving money, trying to get everything aligned to maybe buy a house next year.

I’ve been trying to get my car paid off – as I don’t have much left to go, and getting it fixed because I’m still dealing with the headaches of either nobody knowing what’s wrong with it, or nobody wanting to touch it because it’s foreign and “complicated”. I’m also looking to trade this car in within the next year or less and get something bigger and better.

On top of dealing with working so much, saving money, and still – the car issues – I’ve been dealing with weeks of frustrations about the moving situation.

Months ago, I told my previous landlord we may move at the end of May when my daughter graduates.

We wanted to go back home to IL. or close to it. To friends. To family. To familiar places we love so much.

That didn’t work out, and I decided it was probably best to stay here for one more year – no matter how much we were looking forward to moving back or moving closer to IL. and everyone / everything we love.

I was a little surprised when my landlord messaged me and asked if I would be out by May 1st. I told him no, and that he was informed if we move – a big *IF* – We’d be out by May 31st. He replied and said he’d tell the new tenants they could move in – June 1st.

Um – what?!!!!

I never said we’d be moving for sure, and I let him know that I’d tell him for sure around the end of April, but he took it upon himself to get a deposit, first month rent and a new lease signed from whoever he claimed was moving in.

I know he hated empty apartments because he was losing money, and he always tried to rent out apartments fast. It didn’t matter to whom – he did no credit checks or background checks, and we’ve had our fair share of crazy, wild, people who were up to no good – living in the building – because he didn’t care who he rented to – as long as he had income coming in from each apartment.

So, I wasn’t surprised when he rented my apartment out that fast, and who knows if he was telling the truth or not, but he was ready to have someone move in – from what I heard. I told him that’s not how it works, and he told me, “That is how it works. I’m not renewing your lease. You said a few times you were moving or wanted to!”. I told him no, I said I MIGHT move, and yes, I want to – but we weren’t for sure.

I also let him know my lease goes until 2027 – if I decided to stay.

He said he already has new tenants moving in, and I knew he didn’t want to give them their money back if that was the case.

He ended up selling the building to these new landlords we have now. (A sweet young couple). I felt so bad for them because this is their first ever residential property they’ve owned, and they had to walk into this mess that the previous landlord left behind. So many things need to be repaired, and the husband and I have talked – and he has said if he knew everything he was walking into, they may have thought twice about buying the building.

On top of the building being neglected for so long by our previous landlord, and the new landlords having to fix it all up, now they were dealing with this issue of me not moving until next year, my lease going until 2027, and them feeling like their hands were tied because they felt like they had to honor the leases and the landlords new tenants that he supposedly had moving into my unit.

I let them know that if they had to honor the leases, again – mine goes until 2027.

They were unsure what to do, so I did what I had to do and contacted a lawyer – just to get a legal take on the matter.

The lawyer asked for my lease. I sent it to her. She looked it over.

It was plain and simple.

After putting facts together, she said the new landlords had three options.

………Let me stay another year because my lease doesn’t expire until May 2027.

………Try to take me to court at the end of May of this year and the judge will say the same thing the lawyer is saying and dismiss the case because I have every right to stay if I want to – with the lawyer also letting me know that this won’t cost me any money. It will cost the new landlords money to try to take me to court for something that will be thrown out, and all it will cost me – is time off work to show up.

or

………The lawyer said the new landlords could honor the lease the previous landlord just signed with the new tenants if there really are new ones, and write me a check for $5,000 for my moving costs, as well as giving me my deposit back the same day as the apartment walk-through – as long as it’s clean and in good condition.

These options were told to the new landlords, and I know they have no fault in this matter for the headaches the previous landlord was causing, but they were in it now and had to deal with it, since they are the new owners of the building.

The husband and I had a great conversation after weeks of back-and-forth on this topic, and me having a lawyer to stand with me on this, and the husband apologized. I told him he had nothing to apologize for because the previous landlord caused all of this and not him or his wife. He said whatever he does – he believes in God, walks by faith, makes all his decisions in faith, and absolutely doesn’t want to go to court over this issue.

He agreed my lease goes until 2027, I have no lease violations, my rent is up to date, and there’s no reason to try to make me move earlier, so – he said he was allowing me to stay – which is legally my right anyway. After weeks of that nonsense and trying to figure that out – it all worked out and I’m grateful. 💕

The previous landlord?

There’s so much I could sit here and write when it comes to him and all the drama, craziness, nonsense and weirdness he has caused – not only with me – but other tenants who seem to be sharing their stories with the new landlords as well. I’m not the only one who has had issues for years with the previous landlord – and it makes me feel better because others are grateful that we have new owners as well.

Our previous landlord – he was something else, but I’m not here to bash the guy, and I won’t sit and write all the crazy, wild, off-the-wall stories I have of harassment, drama, and his lack of professionalism. I don’t think he was a bad guy, but he had a lot of his own issues.

I’m not here to mess up his reputation, and I hope that man gets his act together and treats people better.

That’s all I can say.

At the end of the day, even if my car issues aren’t figured out and I have a million other things on my plate – and on my mind – at least the moving situation is figured out, and we’ll be staying here for one more year.

Do I want to deal with another Minnesota Winter that goes from October sometimes – all the way through April? Hell no.

I am happy that we don’t have to hire movers right now or rent a moving truck – continue to pack up and have this deadline hanging over our heads now. 🤗

I feel like because the previous landlord knew that some tenants spoke up against him and the way he was – he caused issues for those of us who didn’t stay quiet, and I look back now on this whole moving situation where he tried to force me out, and I feel like it’s true when the Bible says:

Again, in all fairness, I did tell him I planned to move, so maybe he was just trying to fill the place fast in case the building didn’t sell, and he’d have money coming in from this apartment again right away.

I never knew what his intentions were because they were always changing, but – that chapter of my life is over, and we don’t have to deal with him anymore.

I hope God blesses that man and his family and takes care of them – because I do also know and I can also say – that it wasn’t always bad with him. Yes, there was more bad than good – but there were times we had decent conversations, and I remember one time telling him, “You are too young to be this stressed out! Go have a drink and relax!”.

I remember one time when he called me randomly and told me, “I’m not an asshole like you think I am!”. I laughed a bit because I have no idea where that came from and wondered if he was just at home and thinking about me speaking out against all the repairs he didn’t make, or the way he treats his tenants or what!

That call made me giggle as well.

Anyway, pray for me because I’m here another year, but God is good and I also know it’s a blessing and gives me more time to save for a down payment on a house.

I never wanted to own a house as I’ve said before because of all the headaches that go into it, but I think it’s time. I want my own washer and dryer without having to worry about who is doing laundry when I need to. I want my own driveway, so I don’t have to worry about anyone being parked in my spot when I come home.

I want my own backyard, so my kids can go outside without worrying if someone is going to fly in or out of the parking lot.

My life is far from perfect, and I handle every curve ball it throws at me with faith and grace.

I always say that even if God doesn’t answer my prayers the way I want him to, he answers in ways that he knows he needs to – and that fit his plans for me and my little family. So, if it’s meant to be next year – it will be. If not, it is what it is!

Besides the moving issue and the car still not working properly – let’s talk prom!

My daughter is all signed up to go.

She needed $40 for her prom ticket, and I gave her that.

She told me students have to be there at 5 PM, and parents are allowed to go in for the Grand March and photos at 6. I’m totally going to be there and I can’t wait! 💕

I thought she was going to wear her red dress again that I got her a few months ago for Winter formal.

That dress was $260.

This teenager of mine tells me a few days ago, “I can’t wear that dress again! They’ve already seen me in it. I need a long gown type of dress. It’s prom”. Her dream dress is a black sparkling dress.

We went yesterday to a place that has decently priced prom dresses, but they didn’t have her size.

It took her forever to try on 5 dresses, and as I stood there looking around right by the dressing room area, I smiled a bit when a woman in her 40’s or early 50’s came out and asked if I would zip up a dress in the back for her.

I told her it’s beautiful on her – after I zipped it up. She thanked me and kept on trying on dresses and coming out to show her daughter – who came by the dressing room area, and this woman was looking in the 4 mirrors the shop had.

She was upset because she ripped one of the dresses as she was trying it on, and she was upset because no matter what her daughter (or myself) told her, she announced that she hates this because she’s too old to be trying on things and expecting them to fit.

My heart broke for her because she didn’t even realize how perfect she was in my eyes, and I saw absolutely nothing wrong with her. 🥺 She was fit. She had tanned glowing skin. Her hair was amazing. She had a great figure, and she looked beautiful in those dresses she was trying on. Her teenage daughter giggled about how picky she was being, and I almost wanted to knock her daughter upside the head when her daughter went to the mirror and started complaining about “flaws” on her own face.

“Ew. Why is this disgusting? Why is this like that?”. Her words to herself as she looked at her reflection.

I wanted to tell the mother and daughter how perfect they are, and how I’d love to look like either of them or wish I could trade bodies / body parts with them because sometimes – I dislike my own, so I get it. To me – they were perfect. To themselves – they saw all the flaws they hated.

It made me realize that each of us has something about ourselves we dislike or hate, and we never know who looks at us in this world and thinks we’re perfect, when we can’t see it ourselves. Who looks at us and says, “She’s beautiful”, when we see something totally different in the mirror? Who looks at us and says, “I wish I had her curves, her hair, her eyes” – when we look in the mirror and see all the things we would love to change about ourselves.

It’s sad honestly.

There is always someone out there who looks at you and thinks you’re amazing, so we shouldn’t be so hard on ourselves and pick apart our flaws, but that’s what all of us do, isn’t it?!

So, when my daughter said she was fat and she’ll never find a dress to fit her – I was aggravated and told her about that mother and daughter complaining about themselves inside of the store – when I saw perfection. How we can be our own toughest critics sometime, and there’s people out there that look at others, want to be them, be like them or look like them – while we can’t see it in ourselves because we’re too busy being our own biggest haters.

I told my daughter how perfect she is. How she’s not fat – she’s Latina and curvy.

How beautiful she is and how many girls wish they looked like her.

How I would love to have her figure and I’d rock it if I was her.

How I wish I looked half as good as she does.

And then – I found myself being my own critic and biggest hater again. Picking apart my own flaws again.

It’s sometimes a sad pattern that many of us deal with and if you say you don’t – you’re lying!

We all have something about ourselves we don’t like, and that’s okay – but don’t let it bring you down!

Embrace whatever you don’t like about you, screw the world if they don’t like what they see, and never forget to compliment others when you can – because it may just make them feel so much better about themselves and the things they dislike.

You never know!

Be the reason someone sees themselves differently today! 💕

I always try to give compliments whenever I can, because it may change someone’s whole way of thinking about themselves.

My daughter and I had the talk about self-confidence and seeing herself in a different way, and how I won’t give up finding her the perfect prom dress before next week – even if I have to pay another $260. I didn’t want to, but if it makes her feel beautiful and she finds the dress she loves, I’m going to go above and beyond.

Thankfully, I was worried about also buying her a graduation dress, but she asked if it’s okay if she wears her favorite flowered summer dress for graduation, and it’s adorable. I absolutely agreed to that, and I’m grateful I don’t have to spend even more money on another dress in a few weeks.

So, the prom dress hunt continues, and I ask for all of your prayers as I go crazy over this one. lol.

She also dropped it upon me today that her friend’s mom wants to come over and hang out with me as our daughters get ready here at my house – like they did for Winter formal. She wants to take photos and have fun with us, and I won’t stop her from doing that. I think she has every right to be here watching her daughter get ready and seeing all the fun the girls have here at my house as they do so.

It’s supposed to be my daughter, and three of her other friends, and I’m looking forward to all the beautiful photos, and excitement that night as they do get ready here.

If you want to giggle – they were all going to go as the “Men in Black” characters.

They were all going to show up in Black dresses with black sunglasses on. 🤣

However, one of the girls found a gold dress, and they all decided not to do the MEN IN BLACK idea.

This journey has been amazing – watching my daughter start 7th grade here at this school when we moved to Minnesota, all the way until now – her Senior year. Seeing all the friends she has made. All the memories she has made. All the extra “adopted children” I now have and call my own because everybody knows at that school – that I’m EVERYBODY’S MAMA! 😁 All the crazy nights of homework and late studying. All the tests. All the high school drama she comes home and tells me about.

I’ll remember it all.

All the “lasts” that are now here – as this chapter of her life comes to an end soon.

I thought her Winter formal was her last dance, and I totally forgot about prom, but this is it.

The very last dance, and then – in a few weeks – cap and gown!

To the Class of 2026 – may all your dreams come true, may life be gentle on you, and may you get to do everything and anything you want to do.

Make life fun. Make lots of memories and be kind to everyone you meet.

As for me – in my own life – I’m just taking it one day at a time, trying to get my daughter graduated and onto the next chapter of her life (EMS classes) / college and preparing for our mini-road trip to IL. in a few weeks.

Love you!

💕Shel💕

Milestones, blessings, and a Rainbow Brite themed 44th.

Milestones, blessings, and a Rainbow Brite themed 44th.

Shel R.2 Comments

I came home this morning from dropping the kids off at school – to some big pick-up truck parked in MY spot.

With MY apartment number on it.

Do I know who it is? No.

Do I care who it is? No!

WHY ARE YOU PARKING IN A SPOT FOR A CERTAIN APARTMENT NUMBER – WHEN THERE’S VISITOR PARKING AVAILABLE?!!!!!

This is a small thing. This is truly petty and I’m just jokingly whining about it, but it annoys me because it’s not the first time it’s been done.

I’ve come home a few times and someone is parked in my spot. I don’t recognize the pick-up – to be able to go knock on anyone’s door and ask them to move, and I’m not going to all eight apartments here – to try to figure it out. Still, I almost feel like it should be common knowledge not to park where there’s clear numbers for someone else’s spot. There’s also another big pick-up in one of the visitor’s spots that I don’t know, so I’m going to guess they’re here together – whoever they are.

Thank you to the big red pick-up who followed common knowledge, but this blue one in my spot – who the hell are you?!!!!

Of course, I’m being funny and using humor. I’m annoyed, but at least there was one spot in visitor’s parking open – where I parked, and it’s right in front of my patio door, so it’s not a huge deal, but if I was coming home from a long day at work and just wanted to park in my spot, come in and relax – I wouldn’t be able to.

Part of me wants no part of the headaches that come along with owning a house, but things like this – make me want to start looking for one because I’d like to come home and know that it’s my driveway, nobody is in it – (except maybe my kid’s cars when they get their own), and knowing there will always be parking.

Besides this minor inconvenience just now when I got home, let’s chat.

The weather here is insane!

If you’ve seen the movie “Forrest Gump”, you’ll know the part where he says:

That’s how I feel about this Minnesota weather. “You never know what you’re gonna get!”.

We had a huge snowstorm this past weekend, and Saturday – my son and I couldn’t even get to work.

The roads weren’t plows. Visibility was zero. It was still snowing pretty hard, and since we left the house at 6 AM, it was still a bit dark.

We tried twice to turn the corner and get down the country road by our place, and it was a task.

I like my money. I don’t play about my money, so not being able to try to get to work – wasn’t happening. I was determined, but – nature was even more determined not to allow it.

The 2nd time we turned around to come home, we pulled into the parking lot and saw a crow fly over my car. My son is a bit Superstitious – so when he saw this crow, he made me laugh when he said, “No! Hell no! We’re not going! I’ve never seen a crow just flying around in this weather. That’s something telling us not to go that way. Not to even try to get to work. That’s an omen. That’s a warning!”.

I laughed it off and told him he’s crazy, and that I was going to try a 3rd time when it gets lighter outside in about 30 minutes. We sat in the car waiting, but 10 minutes after we saw the crow – our sirens started going off.

I think I mentioned it before, but our sirens go off for three reasons out here in the middle of nowhere.

–To alert people of bad weather / tornado warnings / watches

–To alert workers / students in the area and let them know that it’s noon (lunch time)

–To call for volunteer emergency personnel to assist regular emergency personnel

I turned on the scanner, and listened to see what was going on, and it was a crash on the route we would have been on if we went to work. Pretty soon, we heard there was another crash, and from what it sounded like – the road we take on the way to work – was closed in both directions.

My son told me, “See? See? We could have been involved in that – if we tried a 3rd time. I knew there was a reason that crow flew over your car. Those warnings are real. Nothing just happens for no reason!”.

Needless to say, I didn’t attempt a 3rd time. We have some great co-workers who went in for us, and we were able to stay home that day. We did carefully drive to the Dollar General around the corner, and get some food, snacks and drinks to stock up on – as we stayed indoors for the day.

I will be going in tomorrow for another co-worker – to make up for that Saturday, so thankfully, I didn’t lose money.

Once everything was cleared from that storm, I was irritated that I looked outside yesterday – and it was snowing again, but – it melted quickly as the day went on and the weather became beautiful. It then started raining yesterday afternoon and quickly got really windy as the rain became snow and rain mixed, and then – just snow again.

I have one friend who always jokes with me and tells me, “You know where it’s not snowing? HERE!”. She moved from IL. down to Arkansas and she’s always trying to get me to move down there. She’ll send me a message, and I’ll hear the birds in the background chirping, and we don’t have that here yet.

I miss that sound!

I have another friend out in IL. who took a video yesterday, and the grass is so green already. Their birds are chirping. The weather is so nice and the sun was out. I’m a little jealous.

I think I need to get the hell out of this state as soon as possible!

……………

In other news, we have a few weeks to go before my daughter graduates.

She is on the “A” honor roll once again for the 3rd time this year. I am so proud of her, and she has worked her ass off to get every credit – every good grade – ever piece of work in, and she deserves the world right now.

She is talking about going to prom – which will be her very last high school dance, and it makes my heart happy and sad at the same time.

I’ve heard that prom ends at 11:30 PM, and then – the school does the afterparty until 2-3 AM, which keeps students out of trouble, allows them to have fun, play games, hang out with friends, win prizes, etc. so, she’s been talking about going to that as well.

This is it!

The “lasts” are here.

She’s growing up.

Not only is this a huge milestone for her – to be graduating – but she’ll also hit another huge milestone when she turns 18 in August. She doesn’t want a graduation party. She’s made that clear, but I do plan to have some of her friends over, or to maybe do a hotel pool / pizza party with some of her friends and still have her enjoy something to celebrate her graduation. 💕 Even if it’s nothing huge.

She made me laugh a few days ago, when she asked what I was going to do when she goes off to college.

I smiled as I was driving and told her, “Go with you! What else would I do? We can share a dorm room!”. She told me, “UH – NO! You have to let me be on my own at some point! I can’t party with my mom there!”.

Me: Uh, you’re NOT going to party! You’ll be too busy studying!

We had a good laugh about it, but I know if she goes to college, it’s going to be such a big change for her, and a little scary at first, but I think she’ll be fine.

She has talked about doing EMT for a while and then going into being a full Paramedic – while also taking classes for her Criminal justice degrees to get into crime scene clean-ups or working in something that has to do with crime scenes.

That is major, and I am so happy and proud she’s on the right path and knows exactly what she wants to do. 🤗

……………..

In other news, does anyone else’s kids have 10,000 socks, but none of them match?! lmfao.

I swear – it never fails. I buy my kids new socks all the time, and by week 3 – the matches are missing.

Once-in-a-while – I’ll get bored and sit down to have a “sock party” as I call it, and I invite all the mismatched socks. 🤣 (Humor of course!). I get all the clean socks together, throw them on the bed or floor, and start matching them up one by one.

My daughter has been telling me she needs new socks for a long time now – because she doesn’t have any or none of hers match. I was in her room a month ago – cleaned it up for her and found at least – 50 pairs of socks that were clean and just needed to be matched. I then told her she better NOT tell me she doesn’t have any socks – or socks that match – again, and I showed her all the ones I found – as she laughed.

My little dude – he has a drawer full of clean socks – and sometimes in the morning – he’ll just throw on whatever socks we can find that fit him – because nowhere on my grave when I die – is it going to say, “She sent her kid out in mismatched socks!”. 🤣 I was bored the day before yesterday, so I ended up dumping out the entire drawer onto his bed, and started matching up clean socks, throwing away baby socks he still had in there that won’t fit anymore, and putting socks that had no matches – in a totally different drawer to do the rest of the laundry and see if they have matches later.

It’s quite the fun time. (NOT!) ha. I know it needs to be done every now and then though.

My little dude – speaking of him – he will be in the double digits this year – as he is turning 10.

Listen.

I sit and think sometimes and while I don’t have it all, and my life could be a thousand times better – or I wish it was – I’m blessed. I have a few milestones coming up to celebrate, I have good kids with good hearts, and they’re kind. I have a job I love. I have some great friends. I have a few great family members. I have my health. I’m still here and this year – I’ll celebrate my milestone of turning 44.

I think I’ve mentioned this before, but this year – I want to have fun. Like – really – have fun.

Most of my birthdays are just going to see a movie, going out to eat with the kids, coming home, taking photos, and enjoying a few glasses of wine.

I have no idea how I want to celebrate this year, but I will say that I want it to be exciting and special.

Fun.

Silly.

A few months ago, I was looking up old toys from the 90’s, and I saw a photo of Rainbow Brite.

I used to LOVE Rainbow Brite, and one of my friends joked that I should totally dress up like her and do a photo shoot. She was joking, but I thought to myself, “WHY THE HELL NOT?”. She asked if I was serious, and I said yes. I just might buy the costume from Amazon and do that. She told me I better send her every cute photo I take, and she told me, “Now you have to get a Rainbow Brite cake made and take a photo of you dressed like her – with the cake!”.

You don’t have to tell me twice! 😁

So, my theme this year for my birthday – is RB – and I still have no idea what I’m doing for my birthday, but I’m doing that photo shoot, getting my RB cake, and making it the best damn birthday I’ve had in such a long time. 💕

My kids laughed and asked if I was serious. Yes. Yes, I am!

I always see these videos on TikTok that say, “If you see your mom living her best life and having fun in her 40’s – let her! She spent her 20’s and 30’s raising you!”. Amen to that!

Anyway, I’m about to run out and run some errands, so all of you have a beautiful day and I will respond to comments, emails, etc. and catch up with your writings tonight.

🤗Shel🤗

Lineman Mike, Senior stuff, and the age of attraction.

Lineman Mike, Senior stuff, and the age of attraction.

Shel R.Leave a comment

So, if you have TikTok – have you gone down the rabbit hole of the whole LINEMAN MIKE situation?

Oh Lord!

I was just scrolling on TT a few days ago, and I saw that everyone was pissed off at Lineman Mike. Not only his wife who jumped into the comments right away, but also – Mike’s grandma.

Yep. The grandma was there. She hopped right on TikTok and said how disappointed she was in his behavior.

I had no clue who he was or what was going on, so I went down that rabbit hole.

The comments were hilarious – with people saying things like, “Oh no! He disgraced his family as well!”, and “Uh oh! He done angered MEE-MAW!”. There were so many comments on so many different videos that people were making about the whole situation.

If you have no clue what I’m talking about, Mike is a lineman who went to something called a “Lineman’s Rodeo”, and then – the bar in Alabama. (Not his home state, I’m guessing?).

A Lineman’s rodeo – is a competitive event – where electrical line workers show off their professional skills. Pole climbing. equipment repair, and rescuing people in a fast-paced environment – (from what I’ve read). Some go to party after.

Mike and all his male co-workers / friends were with him a few nights ago, and all of a sudden – there’s a viral video going around TikTok of some girl – (I won’t say her name) – recording Lineman Mike dancing with her friend. Hugging her friend. Kissing her friend. Whispering in her friend’s ear. Getting close to her friend and cuddling up to her with a big smile on his face – like he doesn’t have a care in the world.

The video says, “My friend found her soulmate last night in Huntsville, Alabama after the lineman Rodeo and we know nothing about him except his name is Mike and his friends kept calling him like the birds in Finding Nemo (MIKE! MIKE! MIKE!). Help us get Nemo home!”

First of all, that’s a whole run-on sentence she wrote, and 2nd – the gulls in the movie “Finding Nemo” say, “MINE!” – but maybe Mike’s friends are just as goofy as he is. I don’t know.

Still…………..

The girl wanted to find Mike for her friend who danced with him most of the night. Who made him smile most of the night.

TikTok always does its thing and when someone asks for help finding someone else – the videos are usually shared around the world, and go viral, and that’s what happened. That’s how Mike’s WIFE ended up finding out I believe. She slid into the comments saying she knows him very well, it’s her husband, and he’s currently “explaining this to our two children”, as she wrote in the comment section of the original video.

Yep. Mike is married!

From what I understand, he wasn’t wearing a wedding ring, but he does have a weird looking “L” on his ring finger that I hear the wife drew there on their first date if I’m correct, and he had tattooed.

Now, I’m not sure if the wife saw the original video or a friend of hers recognized Mike, but – that’s what’s going on right now.

His wife found out, and rumor has it she is leaving him, trying to heal, and just spending time with her kids as much as possible during this tough time for her.

I was scrolling videos about this situation that everyone is talking about now, and many women are pissed at him. Some videos are calling him names and telling his wife she deserves better. Some videos are dissing the girl he was with and talking about her looks – and wondering why Mike would cheat on his beautiful wife with this other woman.

I’ve seen serious videos.

I’ve seen funny videos where the wives of other Linemen side-eye them with mean / warning looks, and these Linemen keep their head straights saying, “Mike done got us all in trouble!”. 🤣 I laughed a little too much when I saw a video that says, “Mike! Just say it wasn’t you” – and had Shaggy’s song (It wasn’t me) playing in the background. I’ve seen many different women and men speaking about this on TikTok, and some are hilarious. Some are not.

I’ve seen Mike’s wife. I’ve seen this other woman. I too wonder why Mike stepped outside of his marriage, but……………

There’s another video that was made – supposedly from a good friend of Mike’s.

This one video says, “Laura ain’t made Mike smile like that in 14 f***ing years…life’s short Mike. File and RUN back to Alabama”.

Pretty much suggesting that Mike files for divorce and runs back to Alabama to go get that girl from the bar that made him smile as much as he did that night.

You know I don’t condone cheating, and I’m saying it again – if you know that you’re not happy with your spouse / girlfriend / boyfriend / whoever – and there’s someone else that makes you smile when you meet them, see them, hang out with them, etc. why are you still with the person you’re with? Why aren’t you with the person you can’t stop thinking about? Why aren’t you with the person you really want? Why aren’t you with the person that makes your eyes light up – your heart skip a beat – and the one you’re nervous around – anytime you see them?

If you’re going to go out and cheat because you’re not happy, or that person doesn’t make you smile – what are you still doing with them?

I don’t want to hear excuses.

We have kids together. We have a lot of assets together. We have a house together. We have a joint bank account together. We have a business together. We have a car or cars together. We’ve been together so many years. We were childhood / high school sweethearts.

NONE OF THAT MATTERS IF YOU’RE NOT HAPPY!

I agree with the guy who made the video saying life is too short – and if you’re not happy with the person you’re married to or with – while I hate seeing divorces – I will say that you should be with who makes you happy – rather than cheating and getting caught. Rather than now – having your soon-to-be-ex – take everything you own or get most of everything.

Kids, assets, the house, cars, money, business’s – there’s always a way to share.

With the things you can sell – sell them and split the money. End the marriage or relationship with dignity and pride – rather than getting caught and being known as a cheat, and a disgrace to the family and your kids / wife / husband / whoever.

It’s okay to end a relationship / marriage and do what makes you happy or be with who you can’t stop thinking about – but it’s not okay to break someone’s heart disrespectfully, and especially – when it’s out there going viral.

There are so many cameras, phones and photos these days. We don’t live back in the 80’s and 90’s where there was no real way of collecting evidence. Evidence is all over these days, and technology has taken over, so never think you’re not going to get caught.

I know some relationships or marriages aren’t that easy to leave, but I feel like if you know you’re not happy and things are not getting better and you’ve really tried – file and move on! End it and move on! BE HAPPY – the right way!

So, this whole Mike situation – while it’s super messy and the world of TikTok is talking about it still – I’m praying for his wife and kids – as their entire world was turned upside down, and Mike is now an internet sensation and not in a good way.

Oh, Nemo. You should have went to your main home that night – instead of chasing Dory. 😶

Dammit, Mike!

Anyway –

My daughter recently had Senior Ditch Day.

She wanted a few of her friends to come over, but I wasn’t comfortable with that while I wasn’t home.

I had to work that day. So, she decided they were going to hang out a coffee shop in the area and go to her other friend’s sisters house later in the afternoon. I know her friend and her friend’s sister, so I was okay with that. It’s right down the block.

I told her to keep in touch with me all day that day, because I didn’t want her roaming the little town without knowing where she was, and she was actually great about letting me know when she changed locations. 💕 She had a good time. She was a good girl, and I laughed when I asked one of the tutors if there was a lot of Seniors in school that day.

She replied with, “Two”. 😁

The entire Senior class ditched.

I’m interested in knowing if they’re going to do a Senior prank this year.

Yesterday, we had this huge snowstorm, and it was pretty nasty outside. The roads were awful, and my daughter wanted me to sign a permission slip for her to go to an area an hour or so away on a school bus with some other Seniors and some Juniors.

I didn’t feel comfortable.

I know there’s been a lot of school bus accidents lately, and the roads being bad – didn’t help, but some of her really good friends were going, and it was for a career event. I didn’t want to stop her from going, so I just prayed, signed, and let her. Thankfully, she made it back safely, and the school bus driver drove safe.

I also know in my heart that she’s getting older and she’s going to want to do so many different things and go to so many different places that I may not want her to go to, but I know I have to let her start living her life. I can’t stop her from living just because of my fears. So, I had to let her go yesterday.

She had a great time there as well, and was grateful I let her go, and that I trusted God to watch over her.

One thing that irks me about these snowstorms we have – is that when the school tracks the weather and knows it’s supposed to get bad, instead of making it an E-learning day from the beginning, they have kids come to school and decide to call / text / email parents at the last minute – that school is closing early and we need to come get our kids, or they will be going home on the buses.

So, I went to get my little dude early, and came home to wait for my daughter to tell me the bus would be pulling up to the school, so I could go get her.

The snowstorm has passed, and we’re supposed to get another one tonight.

I’m over it.

I’d love to sit here and tell you anything else going on right now, but besides work – I have nothing.

I have been watching a new show on Netflix (Age of attraction).

A reality dating show.

A bunch of men and women are put in a resort / island – whatever – and get to know each other, but the only question they can’t ask – is “How old are you?”. Wild, right? The first couple had my mouth drop when the woman said she was 54 (I believe), and the guy said he was 27. She had 3 kids, and her oldest was 29.

See?

This is why I can’t date anyone in their 20’s. My oldest would have been 26 this year. My older son is 23. My younger daughter is 17 – (18 this year) and 2 years away from 20. My little dude is only 9, but I couldn’t even imagine dating a guy who was just a few years younger or older than my kids.

Youngest I’d go – is middle – late 30’s.

The show is interesting though. If you’re bored – check it out.

I’m on episode 2.

Love you!

💕Shel💕

Some chapters in life should remain closed – including friendships.

Some chapters in life should remain closed – including friendships.

Shel R.Leave a comment

So, my brother called me last week.

Yes, you read that right. My brother. The one I haven’t talked to in months because he keeps blocking me if he doesn’t like when I tell him the truth about what I think, or what he needs to hear.

I looked at my missed call list and totally ignored his call.

I didn’t plan to talk to him because I’m so tired of him blocking me. Unblocking me. Blocking me. Unblocking me.

It got to the point where I was okay if we never spoke again – if it meant I get to keep my peace and not have to worry about the pettiness that comes with his drama.

However, a few days later – he was texting me.

He misses me. He’s so sorry. He realizes he was being childish. He went on and on about why I should talk to him, including a few jokes along with his texts. He said he blocked me because I kept asking about his new baby that his ex-fiancé had – and he had no answers for me.

I asked him what was going on with court, because he started a court case to see his daughter and he did nothing with it once it was filed, and he met (yet another) new fiancé he has now. I was irritated that he wasn’t even trying to fight for or see his newborn daughter.

Anyway, he and I were talking the other day – (because he’s still family) – and he ended up asking if I remembered a few people we grew up with in – or close to the same neighborhood. I smiled because I remembered many of them, and he told me about the ones he still talks to or has on his Facebook and told me what some of them are up to these days.

He ended up asking if I remember Jayla and Jayden. *Names changed for privacy*.

I absolutely do!

Jayla was one of my good friends when we were teenagers, and I haven’t talked to her since we were in our late 20’s, and I found her on Facebook years and years ago. For some reason, we ended up losing contact again. Her brother Jayden – was such a cutie when we used to hang out as teenagers, and he and I would always flirt.

Jayden gave the best hugs and if I was having a bad day, he’d take me in his arms, squeeze me and wouldn’t let go until I promised him that I was okay.

We were always hanging out with them or at their house when their parents were at work. They had a few other brothers as well.

So, when he asked if I remembered them, I asked if he still talked to them. He said no.

I put my cell phone on speaker and quickly looked up Jayla first. I noticed she hasn’t posted anything for years, but I found her Facebook, and on the random chance that she sees it – I sent her a friend request. I then looked up her brother Jayden and found him right away.

He’s in his late 30’s now, but he’s still so handsome.

I sent him a friend request as well. He accepted it a few hours later.

He messaged me right away and talked to me like no time had passed at all. 🤗

I told him that I was going to ask if he remembers me, but when he started talking – I didn’t need to. He laughed and made me smile when he said, “Of course I remember you! I had the biggest crush on you back then!”.

I read the message like:

Wait a minute!

You never told me that!!!

I admitted that I also had the biggest crush on him, and no. I never told him that because I didn’t know he felt the same way, but we were teenagers. We were so young, and I laugh about all of it now.

We talked on Facebook a few days ago – about our kids, the lives we have now, me earning two Criminal Justice degrees and moving to Minnesota, him still living in IL. and just laughed about the good old times when we all used to hang out and get into trouble.

He said he really misses those days, and so do I!

We had a nice conversation, and it felt good talking to him again – but then – I looked at his Facebook profile, and it said, “Married to”, and had her name attached to it. He asked if I was married. I said no. I told him I’ve been divorced since 2013, and just to see what he would say, I asked if he was married. He was honest and said yes, but they’re having problems.

I didn’t ask any questions because that’s not my business, and truthfully, I was just happy I was able to reconnect with him – as a good, longtime friend of mine from way back.

When I went to look at his other photos on his Facebook page, I realized he deleted me.

Oh.

Ok.

I messaged him and told him he should have just denied the friend request if he was going to delete me, but I don’t think you can send certain people messages unless you are friends on Facebook at first, so I think he did it because of that. Idk.

I did tell him I wish him the best.

He messaged me back and he gave me his cell phone number.

He replied with, “I do want to continue to talk, and keep in touch. I just don’t want my wife seeing you on my Facebook, and I have to sit and explain everything to her. We’re having problems and I don’t need her drama or her asking questions”.

I understood that, and I asked if she was the jealous type. He said, “Yes and no”. I had no idea what that even meant, so I didn’t ask – but I knew that if he had to hide me from his wife – maybe this was one of those chapters in life – that should just stay closed.

If he couldn’t tell her that nothing ever happened between us, we were good friends when we were younger, and we just reconnected – then maybe – it was best that we just said hi to each other, talked about the good old memories, and moved on with our lives. No numbers. No keep in touch. Nothing.

He then asked me to send him a picture, “So I could have something to dream about when I go to bed”. Yep. That’s what he literally said.

I almost wanted to go on the Facebook of his wife, take one of her photos, and send it to him.

Dream about your wife, dude!

I didn’t do that.

Anyone who knows me – knows I don’t come between marriages, and I have morals, dammit! lol.

I told him no.

I felt like him having to hide our friendship from her, and him asking for photos of me – was crossing more lines than I wanted. I was just looking to reconnect with him after all these years, and it would have been nice to see him again one day if he wasn’t married, but the fact is – he is married – with a few kids.

He needed to respect his wife.

He needed to respect me – as just a good friend from the past – who would have loved to stay friends if I didn’t see what his intentions were that night.

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again.

If you’re not happy in your marriage, sit your partner down and talk it out. If you feel like it’s just not going to work out – get out of the marriage. I know so many people in unhappy marriages, and instead of leaving – some of them would rather cheat, flirt, lie, hide other people they may be happy with.

I never understood that.

So, I told him I was going to bed, and I had work in the morning – (which wasn’t a lie), and I told him it was nice talking to him – and I closed that chapter of my life – again and for good.

I was a little bothered that he felt the need to hide me.

I was a little sad that he didn’t respect his wife enough to not ask me for a photo (of my ass as well), and that it went the way it did – instead of us laughing and catching up like old times, but – it is what it is, and I’m happy he’s alive, well and doing okay.

That’s the end of it.

No. I won’t be using his number.

Anyway – let me tell you about work!

I giggled when a co-worker of mine told me yesterday – that anytime she talks about people at work – to her boyfriend, she always uses “alias” names, and she laughed when I told her I do the same thing when I’m blogging.

I mean – privacy is key, right?!

Some of you enjoy my work stories and I love telling them.

We have a man I’ll call “Chino”, and I think I talked about him before.

Chino has memory loss from an accident he was in many years ago, but he’s still so funny and wild.

The memory loss is only once-in-a-while, but when he gets it – it hits him bad, and sometimes – things he forgot about will come back out of nowhere.

His girlfriend that I’ll call “Shannon” – passed away last year, and he hasn’t really talked about her since. We all thought he forgot about her – and he probably did.

The other day, I was coming back from down the hall and he was panicking. He asked me where Shannon was and told me he can’t find her.

The facility nurse and I – asked if he meant his girlfriend. He said yes.

I was happy when the facility nurse told him gently, “Chino, she passed last year. Don’t you remember? You went to go see her before she passed”. He seemed so upset to hear that news, but slowly – he did remember.

This job is so much fun, but times like these – break my heart and we do have sad moments at the facility.

Yesterday, I was working and he came downstairs and asked if I had his money card.

I said no. I told him that his case manager would have it. I asked him if he wanted me to call his case manager to come to the front. He said yes. So, I did.

While we were waiting, I asked what he wanted his money card for, and he said he wanted to go to Duluth, MN. He said there’s a homeless shelter out there he wants to stay in for a while, because he wants to see new things and travel the world.

He said he can’t stay in one place for too long, yet – he’s been in this facility for years now and doesn’t recall sometimes. Other times, he can tell you exactly how long he’s been there.

Yesterday, he came downstairs many different times asking who has his money card, despite me telling him it’s the case manager, and despite him talking to the case manager about leaving – many different times.

He’s done this before where he’ll talk about packing, getting his money card and hitching a ride to Duluth, but yesterday – he told me Duluth a few times, then he kept saying Fargo, ND. So, eventually, I joked with him and asked where he’s going for real – because he doesn’t even seem to know.

He insisted he was going to Duluth.

He kept talking about how he “wants to see the world before he dies”. The man is young. He’s super young – so, I told him that and joked that if he wants to see the world, he came come into the office and I’d pull up a map with photos for him. I joked that I would go next door to the antique shop and even buy him a spinning globe to see the world.

One of those old school globes that classrooms used to have. He laughed.

I think the case manager just kind of brushed it off as Chino doing what Chino does …talking about leaving, and he’s right there going nowhere the very next day, forgetting he was even wanting to go.

Still, when Chino talks about leaving, I kind of just joke with him and play into it – knowing most likely – he’ll be there on my next shift, and I’m okay with that. I adore Chino.

He did make me laugh yesterday because he always asks for coffee, I’ll give it to him, and he’ll stand by the front desk and pour sugar – spilling it all over the door counter, leaving it for me to clean up. So, I joked and asked him who was going to make me clean up their mess if he leaves?

He replied, “I know huh? Don’t cry about it!”. lol.

****

Jay-Lee.

My Jay-Lee.

She’s a young girl.

Such a sweetheart, and so very vulnerable, so I try to look out for Jay-lee when I’m at work.

She’s an alcoholic with a lot of health issues.

She gets black-out drunk, stumbles in the facility, or she needs staff to go get her because she’s laying on the ground somewhere outside and others come and alert us.

A few weeks ago, she met my daughter.

I took some important keys home with me and had to go back to bring them in, and my daughter was with me. Jay-lee gave her a big hug when I introduced them, and I told my daughter, “If you get a Jay-Lee hug, you’re special! She doesn’t just hand those out freely!”. My daughter laughed.

My daughter then told me quietly, that Jay-Lee was crying.

I looked at her, and she was.

Jay-Lee said she doesn’t have her kids in her life right now, and that her mother doesn’t really talk to her, so I knew it made her feel some kind of way – meeting my daughter. I felt bad.

I told Jay-Lee, “How about this? This is my baby at home, and when I come to work, you’re my baby here?”. She smiled and joked about me being young, too! She told me, “You can be my big sister!”. That’s what Jay-Lee is to me now. My little sister. She walks around calling me, “Sis”, and I look out for her like she’s my little sis.

This past weekend, Jay-Lee was drunk.

Her boyfriend came and asked if someone could go get her outside because she didn’t want to get up.

My son and I work together on the weekends, so since he’s a bigger guy and he knew he could lift her into the wheelchair, he grabbed the wheelchair and went out to see where she was. He made it back inside with her, and I took her up to her room.

We had a “Come to Jesus” meeting! 🙄

I looked her in the eyes, and told her – “Baby, you can’t do this to yourself anymore! It’s one thing to have a few drinks on the weekend to relax, but it’s a whole other monster you’re messing with – to get blackout drunk and not remember what happened the next day, or to be passed out somewhere where someone might leave you there to be raped, or murdered! You’re playing with fire, little sis!”.

She started crying. She kept telling me, “I know! I know!

I sat there and brought up a few different incidents that have happened in the building and out of it when she’s been so drunk like this before, and how things could have ended up really bad, or did end up bad.

Did I tell her that her kids are going to see her in a casket sooner than later if she keeps this drinking up? I did.

She said their father died a while back, and she didn’t want them to lose their mother.

I told her, “But they’re going to J. You’re not healthy and you’re not making good choices!”.

She was in tears, but she needed to be told reality.

I brought up consequences, and choices.

We talked about all of that, and I told her it has to stop.

She said drinking gives her something to do.

I told her if she wants something to do, call me – and we’ll go hang out, or play pool, or do something constructive. She cried more and told me that everyone is older than her and since she’s so young, she feels pressured to drink, to which – I brought up choices again and how pressure = choices.

How choices = rewards or consequences.

Her uncle is in our facility as well, so she asked if we could find him that day.

We ended up going back down to the lobby and when we got there – her uncle was there.

He was angry and asked why she keeps getting so drunk, but he took her back to his room, so he could watch over her for a few hours.

As much fun as I have working there – as much as I joke around and enjoy some of my interactions with our tenants / residents – we do have those sad moments. Those serious moments. Those times we have to be tough and tell it like it is.

Jay-Lee said she’d like to hang out with me instead of getting drunk, but she doesn’t even have my phone number.

I told her I’d give it to her when she sobers up.

But then – we have those funny moments as well…………..

****

Julian is our newest resident.

He moved in recently, and before that – he came to visit his girlfriend who also lives in the facility, so he would always give me shit (in a good way), and just bother me or joke with me.

He’s pretty cool.

I just found out he was approved to move in a week ago, and he says, “Now I’ll be here to bother you all the time!”. I playfully rolled my eyes, and told him sarcastically, “Oh joy!”.

Yesterday when he moved in – I was about to eat lunch and as I was sitting at the desk, he snuck up on me and scared the hell out of me. I told him from now on, I’m waking him up at 7 AM – on the dot – banging on his door like I’m the police.

I told him I’m going to get on his nerves now.

He laughed and told me, “Don’t do that!”.

Oh no, sir! Fair game now. haha.

No, I wouldn’t do that, but it was funny telling him I would.

******

JoJo.

My JoJo.

We have a woman there who I’ve gotten so close to, and she’ll come down often to chat with me and keep me company.

I’m so proud of Jojo because even when the temptations of this world and being an addict – tempt her to go back, she refuses and she’s been clean for so long now. Jojo is such a strong woman, and I admire her for her strength to keep moving forward and not give in to temptation – no matter what life throws her way.

JoJo makes me feel so bad sometimes, because if I’m leaving – she’ll ask what I’m going to do tonight, what I’m making for dinner, or she’ll say, “Take me with you”. I remember one time I told her we’d have to bring her over for dinner one day, and she took it to the – “Yeah, we’ll have a sleepover party”. 🤣Wait girl – nobody said anything about a sleepover. lol.

She’s awesome though, and I love talking to her.

A few days ago, as I was walking through the parking lot after my shift – and going to my car, she screamed my name out of her 2nd floor window. She yelled, “Take me with you!”. I yelled back, “Come on! Jump out of the window. I’ll sneak you into the car!”.

Jojo always wants to come with me when I’m leaving or tells me she just wants to get out of there for a while, and I know those are her cute little hints for an invitation to go anywhere!

I promised her that when I go to Hobby Lobby to put together something for my daughter I want to give her for graduation – I’d take her with. So, a few days ago, she asked me if I did that thing for my daughter’s graduation yet. I smiled and told her, “No, but I did promise you that when I go – you’re coming with me!”. I then told her that she has to stop me from buying the entire store though, and she made me laugh when she said, “Oh hell! I’ll be shopping with you. You can’t trust me to stop you!”. 😁

Jojo makes me giggle, especially the faces she makes when she sees someone she doesn’t like.

She’ll sit there looking them up and down and I have to pray that Jojo behaves herself, and doesn’t say anything, but she’s usually pretty polite unless someone provokes her.

Truth is…

When I move out of this town and hopefully state – I’m going to miss the hell out of these people and one day – I hope to come back and visit.

Minnesota is a beautiful vacation spot, but not a great place to live if you’re from a bigger city originally.

*****

Moving.

We have two months until we move.

I just ordered more moving boxes, and we’re starting to fully pack up, bring everything to the living room and stacking stuff against walls to prepare.

I know eventually – I’ll have to probably make a list of places I want to go look at, head out to Wisconsin or IL. and make my choice on our new place. I know I’ll have to rent the U-Haul and load it up on that last day that we’re here.

The new owners are more than happy to give me my deposit back the same day we leave – instead of making me wait weeks for it like some have to – when they leave this place.

I’m scared. I’m excited for our new adventure. I’m worried and nervous, and also a little annoyed.

Moving is so stressful, and it was so easy to move to Minnesota, but it seems like it’s such a task to move back.

I think I’ll feel better once we’re in our new place unpacking, and we can finally breath again – knowing we have more job opportunities, we’re close to friends and family, we don’t have to drive miles or hours to see dentists, doctors, or just to do something fun, and – when we’re back near civilization.

These 6 years living in a small town – next to a farm where we can open the windows and hear the cows – has been different, exciting and fun at times – but – there’s not really a lot to do, and there’s been so many times I’ve felt lonely – because we don’t have anyone out here.

4th of July’s – are so hard on me, because in IL. people start shooting of fireworks a week before it.

I miss that!!!!

The day of – they’re shooting off M-80’s at 5 AM – and the fireworks – the BBQs, the fun – it all goes from 5 AM until 3 AM or later – the next day.

Out here in this small town – crickets and frogs. Yep. That’s what we’ve heard on the 4th of July. Crickets and frogs.

It’s so dead out here.

So, while I wasn’t sure if we were going to move or even be able to move – maybe this is God’s way of pushing us to something new, telling us HIS PLANS – and making good things happen.

Life doesn’t go the way we plan it sometimes, and I’ve always been told that we don’t get to do what we want. Sometimes, God has his own plans, and he’ll make life uncomfortable for a little bit – to see if you trust him or not. I do.

The next two months are going to be filled with graduation planning, moving planning, and – a busy schedule.

My loves.

I hope all of you have a beautiful week.

I plan to go have coffee tomorrow morning – with a great friend I made out here a few years ago.

My soul feels “lost” right now, and I have so much on my mind.

I always feel better sitting and talking to her over a cup of coffee, so she asked if we were still on for tomorrow, and absolutely! 💕

💕Shel💕

Change is good.

Change is good.

Shel R.Leave a comment

(The cute image above was adorably done by Dibujitos Cheverves) on Pinterest and reflects my need for sleep right now). ha.

So, I’ve mentioned a few days ago that our building has been sold.

I had no idea who the new landlords were until today.

It’s a married couple. A young married couple, and if I remember correctly – I met the husband a few months back when they came to look at the building and apartments, but I don’t remember meeting the wife. I could be wrong and he could just look like some other guy who came here to see the building, but if it’s the same guy I remember – I’ve met the husband.

They seem like a really sweet couple.

They seem like they’d make great landlords.

I was waiting for them today because the elderly woman who lives upstairs – told me that they were coming to give out information since they just took over ownership of the building.

I wanted to meet them. I wanted to talk to them about my lease.

My lease ends at the end of May, and I mentioned to my previously landlord – I’d probably be moving once my daughter graduates. He wasn’t going to renew the lease. He was going to find someone else to take over since I said I was moving.

However – we still haven’t found a place and things back home in IL. are highly expensive and overpriced right now. Gas is ridiculously overpriced, rent, etc. and as much as we want to move back home – I’ve been looking and looking and can’t find anything in the area we’d like to move to.

Parts of Wisconsin are great – but a lot of them are prone to them spinners – as I call them. The good old tornado.

I feel like maybe things aren’t working out as smoothly as I thought they would – because maybe we’re not supposed to move back to IL. or even close to it.

I wish heaven had a phone, so I could call God and ask what I’m supposed to do?! Get some answers from above.

I was watching the Chicago news about a teenage takeover last night in downtown Chicago where teens were acting wild, doing all sorts of goofy stuff, and taking over the streets.

I was watching the Chicago news this morning about teens on the Northside of Chicago (which is the better part of it) – breaking into cars and stealing airbags! AIRBAGS!!!! What in the world?!!!!!

My first thought when I saw the news today – was not only “WHERE THE HELL ARE THEIR PARENTS?” – but also, “Maybe I don’t want to move back there as much as I think I do!”.

………..but anyway………..

I wanted to talk to the new landlords about possibly doing a month to month instead of me being stuck in another year-long lease at the end of this lease.

They didn’t knock on doors though or introduce themselves in person.

They left envelopes in everyone’s doors introducing themselves through a letter.

It asked tenants to download an app where we could pay rent, request repairs to be done, and communicate with them for anything else. The communication part – I’ll probably do tomorrow. It also said they require renter’s insurance (which actually isn’t expensive at all!). We are able to sign up right through the app or website.

I love the fact that we can pay rent online again because our last landlord had that – but after a few months, it was right back to sending him VENMO payments. He couldn’t keep up with the online payments – I guess. I love paying online and I just find it faster and easier than me having to send VENMO’s and messaging to ask if the rent was received.

When I looked online – it says my lease goes all the way until the end of May 2027 – but I don’t know if I want to be here that long, which is where the whole month to month thing comes into play. I don’t want to have to pay if I want to break my lease, and I need questions answered, so I’ll be getting ahold of the new owners.

Change is good, and I’m happy with this change.

Now, we all have to get used to the new landlords. They have to get used to us.

Hopefully it all goes well and works out.

So, they had us download this app – and I was on the app and the website – but neither one was letting me sign up – like the paper said we should be able to.

I laughed when the elderly woman upstairs and I – were messaging each other and she said her phone is so outdated – she needed to go get a new one just to download the app. She said I’d probably have to go upstairs and help her set everything up, and I totally have no issues doing that for her. ❤️ She’s my daughter’s English tutor in school actually, so we’ve gotten to know her pretty well.

As for this app –

I finally contacted support and found out the landlords have to send us an invite link – after they put us into the renter’s system online. I knew I wasn’t going crazy. I know damn well I’m great with computers and apps – so when I couldn’t figure out for 45 minutes – how to sign up – I was getting annoyed.

I messaged the husband because that’s the number on the letter everyone got, and he replied quickly saying he had the wrong email address for me, and his wife was sending me the link right now, and she did. I was able to sign up with no issues, deal with the whole renter’s insurance thing, and learn the new system for rent payments.

*****

Aside from that – my little dude is sick, and I’m pretty sure we’ll be making a walk-in clinic visit tomorrow night if he’s not better.

I picked up more hours at work to save more money to move.

I was interested in the Supervisor position at work like I said a few posts ago, and I wasn’t going to take it – but the money is really good, and I wanted the experience. I ended up messaging my boss and telling her that after doing some thinking, I’ll take it. She did tell me when I interviewed for it – that she has to interview a few others, and I understand.

I’m sure she wants someone with Supervisor experience, and if someone else gets it – I’m happy for them.

I found a new mechanic to work on my car. He’s a mobile mechanic and I see him all over Facebook in our local area, so I messaged him the other day and he was more than happy to come out by me and check everything out to see what’s really going on – after the last mechanic had me there 6 times and guessed much of it.

This mechanic has a lot of great reviews, but he charges $130 to come all the way to me, and I get that. That’s not too much, but I asked how much he’d charge if I went to him, and it’s $100. Hey – the guy has to make money, right?! So, I told him I’d go to him – both when he checks it out and figures out what’s wrong, and when he’s about to fix the issue. The real issue – and not just guessing like the other one.

I still wish I would have thought about the mechanic I know back home when I was out there a few weeks ago. I’m sure he could have easily figured it out and fixed it for me.

Other than that –

I miss family. I miss friends back home. I miss familiar places. I miss good authentic food. I miss Tony’s. For those who had never been in a Tony’s store – you have no idea what you’re missing!

They have everything!

My mind is all over the place tonight. I’m just rambling right now.

I wish I could find the key to my treadmill to get a workout in before I go to bed.

I’ve been stressed and I could use something to burn this energy.

If it wasn’t so damn dark outside right now and I wasn’t afraid of all the wild-life we have out here – I’d go for a late-night jog. Hell, maybe I need to make more friends around here and call someone to tell them to pick me up for a late-night drive through these country roads.

If I’m stuck here another year – I may just have to make some more friends out here.

I’ve avoided interacting with people out here because it’s a really small town. Everyone knows everyone. Everyone is in each other’s business and gossips so much, and that’s just not my thing. So, I keep to myself, but I’m so down to meet new people and make new friends if I’m stuck here for another year.

Yep. I’m rambling about nothing and everything at the same time.

So, I’m going to end it here and get some sleep.

I’m working tomorrow for my boss. She has a lot going on right now and I told her I’d pick up her shift tomorrow – plus – it’s more hours and money for me, so I don’t mind.

Have a beautiful night my loves. I hope to read all of your wonderful posts tomorrow night and catch up with all of you.

❤️Shel❤️

Senior Ditch Day – almost to the finish line and talking about Ella (The niece).

Senior Ditch Day – almost to the finish line and talking about Ella (The niece).

Shel R.5 Comments

(The above adorable photo was taken from Pinterest, and I’d love to credit the artist, but have no idea who it is).

Anyway….

My daughter is so close to graduation, and the Seniors have started talking about Senior Ditch Day, and what they were going to do.

They have a group chat that many of the Seniors are in – on Snapchat – including my daughter.

My daughter was honest with me and told me she will NOT be in classes or school at all – on that day. She wanted to “let me know!”. I laughed, but she’s done so amazing all these years, and I can’t even be mad because she’s never ditched school, so the one day she does – that’s actually made for Seniors to ditch – go for it, kid!

Just be safe, let me know where you are, and keep in contact with me!

She is a little disappointed and bothered because they had a choice between going swimming at a water park, or to the trampoline park, and she was one of the ones – (along with a few others) – who picked the trampoline park.

She doesn’t like the way she looks in a swimsuit. She doesn’t care when she’s around family, but when it’s her classmates, she says “No way!”. She asked if we could just go to the trampoline park – when half the class voted for swimming / the water park.

Then – the leader of the group chat changed it. He said they could also do the trampoline park or the Casino.

My daughter is only 17, so she can’t get into the Casino, unfortunately.

Not even to just walk around and enjoy Senior Ditch Day with the graduating class.

Many of the Seniors are already 18 and said they would rather go to the Casino – with one of the girls suggesting they all pitch in and get a hotel room or two for the night. This girl who suggested it – said that the ones who only 17 – can stay in the hotel room until the others are done at the Casino, but I feel like that’s a little unfair and absolutely boring for the 17-year-olds.

I felt bad for my daughter.

So, when she asked if her, her good friend Peyden, and I – could go to the trampoline park the day of Senior Ditch Day – I said we’d see, but most likely.

I don’t want my daughter to be left out because of her age, and I also don’t want Peyden to maybe want to join the class of 2026 at the Casino and miss out because she’s 18 and my daughter is not – but she feels bad that my daughter can’t go.

I feel like they should all come up with something they can agree on and do as the entire graduating class.

So, as of now – the plan is the Casino and hotel for the group of 18-year-olds. I’m sure there will also be drinking of course, so I’m kind of happy in a way – that my daughter isn’t 18 yet. I think it’s sad that they won’t reconsider for the ones who are not yet 18, but it is what it is.

My daughter won’t be 18 until after she graduates. Months after.

I probably will take them to the trampoline park that day, and out to eat. I want them to have fun and be able to do whatever they want to do.

Along with Senior Ditch Day – comes planning my daughter’s graduation get-together. I call it get-together instead of a party – because it’s just going to be a bunch of her friends, and a lot of fun! I’m not sure if we’re doing it here at the house, ordering pizza, blasting the music and just letting them have a great time, or – if I’m going to rent a hall, the bowling alley, or go skating – and just do this mini get-together party somewhere else, so I don’t have to clean up after.

I giggled this morning when her friend Mya – told me that her dad was in her room late last night – asking what she wants him to order for her graduation party and told me they were renting the lot next door to their house for it.

I guess I should start making plans for Kailani’s get-together, huh?! I think I mentioned before that she doesn’t want a big party, and she likes her personal space, so I ended up skipping the Cardi B. concert I wanted to go to – to get her Romeo Santos and Prince Royce tickets that she wanted so bad – as an early graduation gift.

She was so excited.

Still, knowing I have to plan this get-together – (which I’ll probably do a few days before graduation) – and make sure last minute graduation details are all taken care of – it’s going to be a long – next few weeks.

It’s almost here, and I’m so happy for her.

I asked her yesterday when she’ll get her cap and gown because the teens are allowed to decorate their caps, and she’s been showing me some of her ideas.

I also want to take more Senior photos for fun – now that the weather is getting nicer, and I want to make sure we have tons of photos with her friends – that she can remember and cherish for life. 💕 I know once graduation is over in a few months, my daughter and all her friends that have been so close since 7th and 8th grade – will be going their own ways in life and headed on new paths with new people and new adventures.

I just hope they all keep in contact – no matter how old they are in the future.

I have friends now – that I met in kindergarten and kept in touch with all these years / decades later, so I hope her and her friends – stay friends for life.

You all know the tears are going to flow as soon as I see her walk into the gym with the others I’ve become “mom” to over the years. She’s my biological daughter, but I have so many “adopted” babies that have become mine since I’ve met them, and to see them all graduate and finish high school together – is going to make me so proud.

It’s also so bitter-sweet because I know life is going to take them in opposite directions after high school, as I said – so – we may never see some of them again.

I pray for all of them and wish nothing but the best for them – including my daughter of course!

My daughter plans to go on to training after high school – to get her EMT certification, and after a year – she’ll try to become a full Paramedic, and then she plans to go to college with the money she’s earning from her Paramedic job – to try to become a Crime Scene Investigator, or the person who cleans up Crime scenes. Yep. She wants to go into Criminal Justice – just like her mama! 🤗

I’d like to think that me earning my associate degree and BA in Criminal Justice – motivated her to do the same.

I sat in the high school parking lot this morning talking to my daughter, her friend Mya and her friend Angel, and when they all went to class, I almost started crying – thinking to myself, “These days are almost over!”.

All the high school drama I’ve heard over the years – all the early mornings waking up on school days – all the arguments over homework and different assignments she didn’t want to do and I made her, all the funny moments – all the stuff that drove me crazy… I’m going to miss this!

I know I am.

It reminds me of the excellent Trace Adkins song I love so much:

Before I get emotional – let me talk about something different. 🙄😁

*****

I was asked yesterday – if my niece’s mother ever messaged me or called. The answer is No.

For those who don’t know – I have a new niece named (Ella). She is a few months old now and I haven’t seen her, except for one photo from when she was born – that my brother’s ex posted online. My brother and her don’t talk as far as I know, and she wants nothing to do with my brother.

However, I still want to know my niece. I want my niece to know that Auntie loves her, and Auntie is here for her – no matter what.

So, I sent her mother a package with the cutest clothes, onesies, baby outfits, Pajamas, baby shoes, baby spoons for when she starts eating, and some other things. I also sent a card congratulating my brother’s ex, telling her I want to get to know Ella, and asking her to message me or call.

Nothing. And – I sent it last month if I remember correctly.

She probably thinks I did it, so she’d talk to my brother, but she doesn’t even know I don’t talk to my brother anymore.

Either way – she never even said “Thanks!”, and you know what? That’s okay. I hope she got it and God knows my heart was in the right place when I sent it to her for my niece. I also included a Bath N’ Body works gift card in that Congratulations card, so she could do something nice for herself as well.

I don’t even know if she got it or not, because she’s not saying anything, but it says it was delivered.

What I do know though – is that a few days ago – I got a notification on TikTok.

Good ol’ TikTok tells you who views your profile – IF – they’re signed in.

That’s right! If you want to look at someone’s profile and don’t want them to know – don’t sign in and just look them up.

If their profile is public, you can see it and it won’t show them you viewed it, but – this person was signed in, and it showed they just made their account recently. So, I was able to view it, and I giggled when it was a fake name – but it said “Sister” from your contacts – is on TikTok – and that “Sister” viewed your profile.

When her and my brother were together, I named her “Sister” when I entered her number into my phone – thinking she was one day – going to my new sister-in-law. So, when she thought she was slick signing up for a different TikTok account, using a fake name, and putting her real phone number when she signed up – that didn’t work out for her.

I sat there giggling.

I told my daughter and she laughed with me.

I ended up messaging this fake name on this fake profile – knowing exactly who it was viewing my profile – and I was funny about it.

“When you stalk someone on a burner account / fake account – you’re not supposed to sign up for that burner / fake account with a real email or phone number that can be traced back to you!”. 🤣

I told her I knew it was her.

I told her I’m sorry for everything that happened between her and my brother.

I told her I don’t blame her for leaving him or not wanting anything to do with him – because of how he is, and that I just want to get to know my niece.

I told her I’d appreciate it if she at least let me know if she got the package that I sent to her or not – even if she wants to tell me to “F*** off!”. I’d respect her wishes, and that I wasn’t trying to cause her any drama or problems, but I’d also appreciate it if she lets Ella know me.

I asked her to reach out to me.

Still – nothing, and now that I sent that message – the fake profile has been deleted – it looks like.

Also, if someone ever wants to talk to me, message me, etc. – let me be clear that you don’t have to look me up, view me or stalk me on a fake account. Just be yourself, message me as yourself, and say, “Hey!”. I don’t mind chatting.

So, no – I haven’t heard anything from her, but she did view my TikTok – and probably my other socials.

I’m just bothered that I can’t get to know my niece and there’s really not much I can do about it, but birthdays – holidays, etc. I do plan to put some money to the side for Ella, and when she is a teenager or old enough to know who I am and me to message her one day in the future – I will give her anything I’ve saved her for, any money, and see what comes of it.

*****

I wish I had more to sit here and tell you, but I don’t.

My life is pretty boring at the moment and all I do is work, try to save as much money as I can to move, figure out how and where to move, pay bills, work some more, and try to live finally – instead of just surviving.

I love you and hope you’re all doing well and in the best of happiness, love, and peace. 💕🤗

💕Shel💕

“It happens”, A horny bunny, car issues, a fun concert and other chats.

“It happens”, A horny bunny, car issues, a fun concert and other chats.

Shel R.8 Comments
Daily writing prompt
What tattoo do you want and where would you put it?
View all responses

To answer today’s WP writing prompt question………………..

I want the words “It happens” – in memory of my oldest daughter – with Angel wings, the time of her birth and the time of her death.

I don’t want the dates on there because I don’t want to remember the date of her death.

I’d rather see the time she was born – that made me a mother, and the time of her death (the hour she got to meet God and felt peace).

“It happens” – represents the very last hilarious memory we had together.

*****

I was near Minneapolis the day before the “it happens” incident – for a dentist appointment and I stopped at Wendy’s on the way home.

I live 4 hours from Minneapolis, so it was a long drive and I was starving.

I ended up leaving my debit card at Wendy’s, so when I called them – I was told that the manager has it in the safe, and if I brought my I.D. in the next day, he’d hand it over. I needed my debit card the next day, so early in the morning – I’m talking (5 AM) early – I got ready to drive all that way to go get my card.

My Tiffie “Jordan” found out and asked if she could come with me. She lived across the hall at the time, and I told her to be ready.

She loved long car rides, and she was ready before I was.

My youngest daughter rode with us as well.

On the way back, we were all so tired from waking up earlier that morning, so we were quiet driving home.

My oldest was in the passenger seat and she randomly said, “The Tile shop” – as she was looking out of the window.

I looked over, saw the Tile shop, and replied, “It happens!”.

I have no idea why I said that, but I was so tired – it just came out for no reason.

My daughter was so confused, looked over at me and says, “Wwwwhaaattt? Why would you say that? That didn’t require a response”. 🤣 We all started laughing so hard. Literally, we had tears in our eyes because we couldn’t stop laughing.

She kept mocking me and saying, “It happens!”, and then said “The tile shop. It happens!” – joking that it could be their new motto / jingle. She said “it happens” made no sense, and we just kept laughing. Eventually, she had to tell me to stop because I was laughing so hard, I couldn’t drive straight, but that’s what made that moment even more hilarious.

I’m sitting here laughing right now – not able to drink my coffee because I still recall how much we were laughing – at that moment.

It went on for at least 10 minutes, and when we stopped – one of us would say it again, “The tile shop. It happens!”, and we’d all start laughing again.

We decided at that moment – that as soon as my youngest daughter turned 18, we’d each go get matching “It happens” tattoos.

I don’t know if my youngest daughter still wants to do that or not, and Tiffie “Jordan” has passed on – but it’s a tattoo that I plan to get for myself – because it’s a reminder not only of our last hilarious memory with my oldest that day – but – of the fact that life happens, and doesn’t stop or slow down for anyone – even in grief.

And now – I’m crying as I write this part.

For me, “It happens” – is both a great memory months before she passed, and a reminder that there’s things in life I can’t control, and I just have to shrug my shoulders, say “It happens” and trust God to take care of those things. “It happens” can be both – a funny memory and a sad reminder that things do happen and life has to go on.

So, for me – I want the tattoo – as a reminder of both meanings.

My next tattoo:

Again – with the time of her birth and the time of her death.

💕

I also want to eventually get a memorial tattoo a little more meaningful, but I haven’t figured that out yet.

I have different ideas.

As for where I’d put it, still not sure of that, either – but it’s happening. It happens. ha.

*****

Anyway, let me share some updates.

The landlord finally sold the building.

He had new roofs put on last week, and the lady who helps him with the property and I – were kind of talking and I realized that he probably accepted an offer, and one of the conditions of the purchase – was that he put new roofs on the garage and building.

I would have asked for those garages to be torn down and rebuilt if I were buying this place, but either way – I’m hoping the new people are good. I’m hoping they’re not a “put a band-aid on it and call it a day” people – like our landlord was.

Everyone got notices on their doors yesterday – stating that as of today – we have new owners.

It said they have to honor all leases until leases end, and that they will be reaching out to introduce themselves. Not sure if it’s in email, person or by phone. It also said they will let everyone know how to pay April rent, and I’m hoping we can pay online, because I was so tired of using VENMO or money orders to send rent to our last landlord.

Still, even if I move soon – I’m happy the people living here – have new owners for the building because while I don’t think our last landlord was a bad guy, I do think he wasn’t the best landlord.

The bunny:

My daughter’s bunny stinks!

Really bad.

I kept telling her to clean the cage, because I thought it was the bedding or that she wasn’t changing it, and she kept telling me she cleans his cage out all the time.

We went back and forth for weeks on it, and I kept buying her different bedding to see which one worked best for the smell, and no matter how many times she changed the bedding or cleaned the cage and scrubbed it down – I’d go in her room, and it smelled like hell in there, and I still thought it was the cage.

She insisted it was the bunny. I told her there’s no way the bunny smells like that.

So, I gave in and took the bunny to the vet last week, and upon getting close to the small transport cage he was in, I smelled the bunny. The smell was coming from the bunny. I just looked at my daughter and yelled, “OH MY GOD!”. She said, “See! I told you it was him!”.

The vet did a full exam and some lab work, and the lab work looked good, so when she came back into the room to talk to us, she said the problem was simple.

She told my daughter to cover her ears (joking around of course!).

The vet looked at me and told me, “The bunny is horny!”.

I looked at her like:

And laughed.

“You’re joking, right?” – I said.

She said this is common and when male bunnies get horny and want some – they don’t wash themselves like they should or like they’re supposed to be.

They stop taking care of themselves because the smellier the bunny – the more they attract female bunnies.

She then adds to it and tells me that he’ll hump whatever he can in his cage and when he ejaculates – it sticks to his fur in the back and his testicles. 🙄 That in return – is making parts of his bedding stick to his testicles because he’s all sticky and nasty, and because he’s not cleaning himself because he wants to attract a female bunny – that’s all coming together and creating that awful smell on him.

I rolled my eyes, and asked what could be done.

She said it’s easily fixable in BUCKS. I didn’t even know they call male bunnies – BUCKS.

I thought that was just for male deer.

Them not cleaning themselves and making themselves smell like that – asserts maturity and dominance according to the vet, and in the wild – will attract a female bunny.

Maybe I should have done more research before walking into a pet store and thinking a bunny would be adorable for my daughter after she lost her bird a few years back.

So now – this bunny is maturing, and he’s horny – which is causing all these other issues and the smell.

He’s nasty and unsanitary! That’s what he is. He’s doing it for attention from a female bunny as I said, and he doesn’t realize his dumbass is an inside bunny and there’s no female bunnies around. Nor – will there ever be! Sorry for ya – Looney! Dammit, Looney! Yes, that’s his name.

My daughter thinks this is hilarious.

I ($600 later) do not!

So, the plan? To get the $600 together to have his testicles removed, remove all the sticky parts of his bottom from him ejaculating on himself and getting his bedding stuck to it as well – which obviously requires surgery and him to be put under – so he doesn’t try to get away and hurt himself during surgery.

His ears need to be cleaned also. Again, he’s not cleaning himself like he should be – for the simple and stupid fact that he doesn’t understand he’s an indoor bunny.

Some people I’ve told this story to – laugh so much when I tell it – and they suggested I get a female bunny because it would be cheaper than surgery for our male bunny. No thanks!

A female bunny for our male bunny = a bunch of baby bunnies I don’t need or want.

I swear – my life is never boring.

If it’s not something with the kids – it’s one of the animals. If it’s not the kids or the animals – a bill pops up to surprise me or something at work is going on that I have to deal with. If it’s not any of that – my car comes up with a new issue.

Life needs to slow the hell down and let me just sit and breath for a minute!

But it doesn’t stop there.

Want to talk about my car?! Let’s do that!

So, if you remember and you read my blogs pretty regularly – (Thank you first of all) – 2nd – you’ll know my car has been giving me problems.

The EPC and check engine light have been on in the last few months.

The RPM needle goes crazy sometimes and bounces around on its own.

This causes my engine to shake like crazy and my car to make this loud, awful noise.

My car feels like it wants to shut off or take off – either one – by itself. It feels like it wants to accelerate on its own sometimes.

When I’m parked and the car is on – it rattles and sometimes – it feels weird driving when I step on the gas.

Now, I like to support small businesses, and if a small business is amazing and gives great customer service, I’ll promote them everywhere and anywhere for free. I’ll tell the world about them – to help them grow their business.

However, if customer service is awful, and they do nothing to fix the issue or make it right – I’m also going to let people know that they should go elsewhere.

Now, everyone has different experiences with different places, so I can only tell what happened to me and it’s their choice to go try the business out or take my advice and go elsewhere.

Anyway – I’ll call this guy “Mario”, although – I should put him on blast, but that’s not the kind of person I am.

I took my car to Mario’s shop months ago and explained the issues. He saw the issues for himself when he got in my car, looked under my hood and saw / heard everything that was going on.

“It’s an easy fix. It’s the Spark plug! You have a bad one!”. Mario told me.

“Great! Let’s get that ordered and taken care of!”. I told Mario.

I was grateful it wasn’t anything big (Or – so I thought!).

He changed the Spark plug the same day, and I left.

$100 later – and my car was good for a day and then started doing the same exact things all over again and I realized Mario was wrong. So, I took the car back, told him it wasn’t a Spark plug, and he acted confused, but told me if I give him a few hours with my car to do a “deep dive” – he’d figure it out.

A few weeks later, Mario checked it out and told me, “You need a new Timing chain”. He said something about the Timing chain being bad, and half of it sliding down 3 teeth on Cam shaft bank 1 – or whatever the hell he said. Something like that. lol. I didn’t listen fully, but he also said the other Spark plugs and a sensor also need to be changed.

I asked if that would fix these issues and he said – in his heavy accent, “Yes, yes!”.

Fine. Let’s get those parts ordered and get this all done.

A few months ago – back in January I believe it was – my car was in the shop, and everything was being replaced. His wife was nice enough to drive me home and then pick me up to go back and get my car when it was done – many hours later.

I took it home, drove it and thanked them so much – because it drove beautifully – FOR THAT DAY.

The next day – I went to pick up the kids from school, and my car stated, but it wouldn’t go anywhere. It smelled highly of gas, and I called Mario and let him know. He came right over because his shop is right down the block.

When he looked under the hood – he giggled a bit and told me, “Your fuel pump just went…………..” (and he made the exploding noise with his mouth). Excuse me? Why are you laughing first of all? 2nd – my fuel pump was just fine before you worked on my car.

I didn’t tell him that because I didn’t want to accuse him of anything, but he says, “maybe you need a new fuel pump, but maybe not. Maybe you have a fuel leak, but maybe not”. I do or don’t to all of your “maybe’s” sir. Figure it out! So, he reconnected it and said it should be okay. It’s been okay for now, but who knows if it’s messing up or not. My car was able to be driven that day, but it’s still doing the same exact issues it was doing when it originally went to this guy.

The Spark plug didn’t fix it.

The Timing chain replacement, other Spark plugs being changed and the sensor didn’t fix it. It was back to doing the same things.

I took it back to him again. It also started doing this thing where it jerks forward when I try to drive.

I told him all of that and how none of the things he’s done, has fixed the issues.

The 4th time I took it back to him – he said something just needed to be cleaned from under the hood, so he did that. It drove fine that day.

Still back to the same problems the next day.

I almost feel like he’s just resetting stuff in my car to make it drive okay for a bit and hope it stops the issues.

The 5th time I had it back to him – he says, “Um, maybe a mouse got into your engine area and chewed some wires. Maybe not”.

What is with him and all these maybes? I was getting annoyed, and told him that he keeps guessing what’s wrong, and still not fixing the original problem. He asked me to bring the car back again – and he looked at it a 6th time.

This time, he said that day:

“Okay. I know now! It’s a valve. The valve is stuck”. I asked if he was absolutely positive because a real mechanic would have figured it out the first time, instead of changing all these other parts that I don’t even know if I really needed or not. He guaranteed me it’s the valve.

I argued that he guaranteed me it was all the other parts he changed as well.

He stood there in front of me GOOGLING the problems and looked up – as he said, “What could it be?”.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW?

So, I yelled at him. I felt bad, but I was so angry and bothered that he was googling what it could be – and he was pretty much admitting he didn’t know, so I paid for those other parts for nothing. He was guessing what it was, and the original problem was still going on. Here I was for the 6th time in his shop – and he didn’t know what it was.

He asked me for another day with my car, so he can check it out again and he had the nerve to tell me that it may get “costly”. NO! NO! HELL NO! I am not letting you touch my car again, and that’s what I told him when I was in there for the 6th time.

I let him know I wanted my money back, so I could go to a shop who knows what they’re doing.

A few days before that, I took it to another shop for a 2nd opinion, and I was told that the Timing chain is 3 teeth down and the same thing about the cam shaft that this guy said, and they said if it was changed, it was put on wrong.

Now, I’m left wondering if I paid for a Timing chain that was never changed.

So, I told him about that and what the 2nd shop said. I told him that they said I don’t need a valve like he said. I need the Timing chain done right, and I need a new harness, and this guy – MARIO – never mentioned a new harness, which leads me to believe he has no clue what he’s doing, and he collects money for his guesses – and possibly – for work he never does.

So, yes – I yelled at him.

Not loud, but I raised my voice a bit, and he told me he can’t give my money back because he did the work. I told him that he got paid to fix the issues and he did not!

He looked at the ceiling, laughed and walked to the back.

I kind of giggled thinking, “This man is about to go cut my brake lines for yelling at him!”.

I have been so patient and so kind with him, and I’ve let him have my car – trusting him more than I should have – to fix the original problems, and he didn’t. He couldn’t.

I read a review on his site where some other woman came in, and she was angry as well because half her new parts she had put in before going to him – were all changed to old parts, and he supposedly took her new parts out – and she too – said he was replacing things that there was nothing wrong with, and a few other things.

She warned people about going to him. She said he and his wife seem like good, sweet people – but she thinks they’re running a scam.

So, my car won’t be going back to him, and now it’s a game of figuring out the best shop to get it fixed and how much it’s going to cost for the real issues to be taken care of. I have always thought it was something with the throttle body because I don’t know too much about cars – but I know a little bit here and there amd it seemed like it.

I have a friend in IL. who asked me what was going on with and when I described the issues – he said it sounds like the throttle body accelerator pedal and maybe an engine sensor.

I was just in IL. not too long ago, and part of me really wishes I would have thought about him and taken my car to him. He’s a mechanic, and he’s really good at his job, but – I didn’t think about it until he messaged me asking what’s going on, and I was already back in Minnesota.

He did ask me to go somewhere to have the codes pulled up, and to let him know, and I plan to do that this weekend.

I was happy he mentioned the throttle body because that was my first thought as well.

I should have totally been a mechanic. ha.

So, besides the bunny needing this surgery, so he’s not horny and doesn’t smell anymore – and so he hopefully starts cleaning himself – and these car issues I’m still having – there’s also moving.

My plan was to find somewhere to move to by the beginning or middle of May, so that when my daughter graduates – we have a moving truck in the parking lot, and the moment we come out of that school after graduation – we’re in the car heading to our new place close to – or in – IL. However, it’s so damn tough trying to find a place when you have to travel hours to go look at the places.

So, I plan to get a list of places together by April 20th maybe, and start planning a trip out that way to go look – hoping that my car is fixed by then.

The bunny. The car. Moving. Finding a job out in Wisconsin or IL. wherever we move – it’s all so stressful, and my sanity – is still intact. GO ME! lol.

While I sit here and sip my coffee and think of everything I have on my plate and all the stress that’s upon me right now – I do have to smile and let you know how proud I am of my daughter.

She only needs two more credits to graduate.

One is for her elective class (Teacher’s assistant). She’s been a TA in my son’s room for the last few months and she loves it. She will be done with her credit in her elective – this semester, which means if she decides she doesn’t want to be a TA next semester, she can drop that from her schedule, since she’ll have that one credit she needs.

She needed all 4 semesters of her last English class, so she still has to go for that this semester and next, and after next semester is over, she’ll have her last credit she needs. 🤗

That means – that after this semester is over and she receives her last credit for her (TA) elective class – she only needs her English class.

That means – if she wanted to right now – she could drop all her other classes, and only do TA and English every day, and go to school for those two hours.

That means – once her elective class is over – she only needs English next semester and would only have one class – and can go to school 50 minutes a day and that’s it.

This girl – is taking all these other classes and going to school all day long – for fun.

To see her friends.

To have something to do – as she said.

She doesn’t have to go to school until 11 AM – which would be her TA class, and then her English, and she can come home. However, she actually enjoys going to school – even when she doesn’t need to be there and even when she’s taking these other classes – when she doesn’t have to.

I am so damn proud of her.

She is also now taking a course that OSHA offers – for anyone looking to further their education and have some safety training in their future career. Kailani wants to be an EMT, so she’s taking their class for that.

This girl has been amazing and has worked her ass off to get where she is right now, and she deserves the world. So, I think I mentioned this before – but instead of buying myself Cardi B. tickets when she was in Minnesota for a concert – I brought Kailani Romeo Santos and Prince Royce tickets to surprise her with – as an early graduation gift.

She wants to go see them so bad, and I’m more than happy to make that happen for her.

I got the tickets already if I didn’t mention that before, and if so – my bad.

She earned it.

💕

Still, I hope we live in IL. or close to it at the time of the concert because it’s at the end of May, and I don’t want to have to worry about getting a hotel room for the night. I just want to go home and relax – unpack – and hear all about how she enjoyed her night – the night of the concert.

Loves.

Pray that everything works out for us, because life is kicking my ass right now, and it’s just me alone doing everything for the kids – the animals – and nothing for myself.

I’m exhausted. I’m drained, but I still feel blessed and have faith.

💕Shel💕

Best compliments ever received (WP writing prompt), almost promoted, and funnies at work.

Best compliments ever received (WP writing prompt), almost promoted, and funnies at work.

Shel R.7 Comments
Daily writing prompt
What was the best compliment you’ve received?
View all responses

Answering today’s WP writing prompt, let me say that I giggled a bit when I read this question.

When I was much younger, blonde and a little thinner – I was in line one day at a Jewel – Osco in Chicago.

Damn, I miss those stores!

I was waiting in line for the girl to ring up all of my items and I was about to pay, when I turned to look behind me and some guy was looking at me. I felt weird, but I looked back again and he was still looking. I smiled politely, and I tried not to look at him a 3rd time.

One of the items I had – was on sale, so the cashier asked if I could give her just a second to run and see if she could find a sale code – to put it in the register for me. I thanked her and told her I’d wait. As I did, the guy behind me who kept looking at me – finally broke his silence.

He says, “Excuse me! Please forgive me for this, but has anyone ever told you that you look just like Shakira?”.

I smiled – because that’s one hell of an amazing compliment, and I told him No. Nobody has ever told me that, but I also thanked him for that.

It made me feel good.

He says, “So, stupid question. You’re not her, then? I was about to ask for a photo and an autograph”. He nervously laughed. I laughed with him and told him I could still be famous one day, but not that day. He told me how pretty I was, and I thanked him again and carried on with my day – smiling the whole way through it. 😁

For the record – I have never thought I looked like Shakira, but it was nice to hear.

She’s crazy beautiful, and I’m – cute, I guess. lol.

I will also say that was a long time ago, and – did I mention that I was much younger? I did. Okay.

Nobody would or could say that to me now. haha.

Shakira – in case you have no clue who she is.

And below – is me – way back in my younger, skinnier, blondie years.

I’ve also been told back then – that I looked like Amanda Bynes.

The way she looked back then – not now.

(Photo taken from Newsweek).

I never thought I looked like her, either, but again – it was nice to hear.

That poor Amanda these days, my heart breaks for her. She was gorgeous back then.

I think that hearing people thought I looked like both of them back in my younger days – was the biggest and best compliments I’ve ever received.

Another me (young, blonde and skinnier) photo – below:

And another….

(By the way, K.C.) – was an old nickname.

In Hawaii – my name is Kila. Pronounced – (Kee-La). C is for my middle name. So, some used to call me K.C.

Do I see any resemblance?

No – but it’s still the best compliments I’ve ever received. 💕

I miss my blonde hair. I miss being as skinny as I once was. I miss being young, dammit!

Anyway, I’m blessed to be here still for 43 – and this year – 44.

Every day the good Lord gives me – is a blessing.

That being said –

I worked my first overnight shift last night at the facility I work in.

It actually wasn’t bad.

During the night – different people would come out of their rooms for different things, or just to come down and chat, but I had no major issues and everyone behaved.

I came home so tired this morning, got my kids ready for school, took them, came back and showered – got ready for another day, and went right back to work.

One of our lead staff was demoted, so I asked my boss if I could take over her position and get promoted. My boss seemed so happy I asked and said she thinks I’d be a wonderful person to take over and that I’d be good for the job.

It comes with higher pay, benefits, more vacation days and other perks, but the only downside – is that my phone would be blowing up. I’d be a supervisor, so I’d be the one my co-workers would then call or send texts to if there’s trouble, if they need help or advice, if they can’t come in and I have to cover their shifts, if there’s any time off requests needed, time adjustments, and so on.

It’s a lot of responsibilities and while I don’t mind – the deal breaker – was me having to work 80 hours per paycheck mandatory – still do my weekends as I’m always on now, and then – BE ON CALL 24/7.

I would basically have no life. No time for myself or my kids. No time to do anything fun because I’d always be at work, dealing with things at work, covering shifts, or just handling calls and texts all day. If there’s an emergency where cops or medics have to come in, I’m dealing with that or going to the job site – no matter what time it is – to figure things out.

I’d be in charge of interviewing and hiring as well. I’d be in charge of deciding who needs to be fired.

I don’t want that hanging over my head.

I was so excited to go meet with my boss today and talk about taking the position – as we sat in the office that would be mine. That’s another thing that I loved. I’d get my own office and can decorate it however I want to.

Still – the thought of working SEVEN days a week and then being on call 24/7 on top of that – isn’t appealing to me. So, there are absolutely some downsides to the position as well.

I could give up my weekends if I wanted to and just do the 5 days a week, but then it also clashes with my kid’s school schedules – not to mention we’re probably moving soon if all goes well as I said before, so I’d feel bad taking the job, and leaving my boss high and dry to find someone totally new and train them in – once I leave.

So, as much as I was excited for a higher position, more pay and benefits, etc. I decided to pass on it.

My boss told me to take some paperwork home, read it over and think about it, but she was honest with me and told me if I didn’t jump on it and take it today, she’d have to keep interviewing for it, and I told her I totally understood. I let her know my concerns with the position, and that if I didn’t take it, I’d still be there for my shifts that I have now, I’d still do my job correctly, and I trust her to hire the best person for the job – who may be okay with all that extra stuff it comes with.

I may be stupid for passing it up because it’s a great opportunity but being a mother as well – I just don’t want to spend my life at work all the time. I enjoy spending time at home and with my kids as well. So, I feel like this position is something for those who have that time to be at work and be on call and go in whenever they are needed.

I am so grateful she thought of me, and that she thought so highly of me to want to give me this position.

She made me smile today when she told me that she watches me with everyone there and that even when I’ve had a bad day, or people are out of control and drunk there – acting stupid – she sees me smiling, joking with them, and handling every situation with love, compassion and grace and that’s what she’s looking for in a Supervisor. 💕

Hell, I’ve written about that lady “Daisy” that I’ve gotten so close to there.

The one who wreaks havoc and gives the place hell when she’s drunk – and how many problems we’ve all had with her. Well, this past week – one of our other lead staff walked up to me and tells me, “You’ve got a – way with Daisy”. She meant that I seem to be able to handle her little bad attitudes and her drunk rampages, and wild behavior, and that I can calm her down, or get her to listen to me.

I smiled and told this other lead staff that there are many times I can easily handle Daisy because I take no shit – and she’s not going to walk all over me when I’m there. I told her that there are many times when yes – Daisy will calm down and listen to me, but I’ve had my fair share of Daisy telling me to get the f*** out of her face, or her telling me to leave her the f*** alone, so it just depends.

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again.

With the clients we work with that live in the facility – it’s all about gaining their trust, getting to know what works with each person individually and what doesn’t – especially if they’re on something or drunk, and knowing how to handle them. I’ve learned their personalities, and I match their personalities with my own – depending on the situations and that’s how I stay calm and handle things.

I would have loved that Supervisor position, and I also think I would have been great at it.

My co-workers would have known that they could message me or come to me for anything, and I’m always going to have their backs, but again – it’s just the schedule and the times – being on call all the time – and the fact that I would feel like I’m living at work – instead of putting time into my family – that made me decide the Supervisor position isn’t for me.

Decisions suck, and it’s hard when you really want something, but it doesn’t align with everything else you have going on in life, and family time.

I’ll still be at the same job, and if we move – it may only be for another month or so, but at least I know that my boss saw so many amazing things in me – that she tried to get me to take the Supervisor position, and I hope a future boss sees it as well.

If you want to laugh a bit with me – My little-itty-bitty – trouble-making Daisy – went to jail.

I’m not laughing that she’s in there. I miss her causing trouble around the place and it’s been boring since she’s been out of the building, but what did make me laugh – is that Monday when I worked – she was drunk and running her mouth to everyone, including my boss.

My boss gave her a lot of fair warnings to be quiet, be good and go back to her room, and she refused.

My boss threatened to call the cops for her disturbances, and Daisy still wouldn’t keep her mouth shut.

At one point, my boss walked away, and I begged Daisy to just go back to her room because my boss was really about to call the cops. My boss heard her yell, “I don’t give a f***! Call the cops. I don’t have any f***in’ warrants!”.

My boss sure the hell did call the cops, and I thought she was pretending at first when I sat next to her and she was talking to “the cops”, but when she got up and walked away – telling me to let her know when they were there, I realized she was so serious.

Daisy made me laugh when she saw the cops and all of a sudden – wanted to go back to her room.

They ended up coming in and trying to talk to her, but she got mouthy with them as well, and they weren’t having it. They already know her, so when the two of them stood on each side of her and grabbed her arms, they told her she’s under arrest and has warrants…..

I stood there wondering……………

DAISY!!!!!!! WHAT THE HELL?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was going to go visit her today, but you have to be on her approved list, and I can’t even get ahold of her to tell her to add me, but maybe tomorrow – I’ll see if I can figure it out.

My overnight shift last night was quiet, especially without Daisy there drunk – and I was up all night with different people coming out of their rooms to keep me busy or keep me company.

As soon as I got there, one of the young ladies asked me for a pregnancy test.

I can say a lot, but that’s not my place, and I just prayed she wasn’t pregnant because while I don’t judge anyone since none of us are perfect – she is not on the right path to have a baby. So, I handed her the test and told her to let me know, because if she was pregnant – I was still going to support her, do whatever I could for her and the baby, and just be someone she could come to if she needed someone to be there.

When she came downstairs at 5 AM this morning with her boyfriend – who also lives there – she held up the test and told me it was negative.

I asked if she was happy with that, and she said yes. So, I let her know I was happy as well.

I told her boyfriend to walk over to the FREE CONDOMS box we have at one of the desks – and grab a couple. I told him to start making it a habit to grab free condoms anytime he’s down there.

When he walked over to the tissue box and grabbed tissues, his girlfriend laughed so hard and asked what he planned to do with those. I joked and told him, “Hey! That works, too! No sex is one way to prevent pregnancy. Do you instead!”. I had them both laughing so much, and he thought for some reason – I told him to grab tissue.

THE TWO DON’T EVEN SOUNDS THE SAME.

CONDOMS. TISSUE. What?!!!!!!!

He stood there looking confused, and his girlfriend and I – couldn’t stop laughing.

I asked her if she was sure this is who she would want as her son or daughters’ father, and she laughed even harder. I went as far as to ask her boyfriend what “2 + 2” is, and when he stood there thinking about it – I was done. I lost it and laughed.

I volunteered to allow him to take the entire box of condoms upstairs. 🤣

This is why I love my job though.

I know I can be tough and firm when fights break out, or someone is beyond drunk and acting goofy, but I also know that I can be myself, joke around and have some good laughs with the people who live there.

Coffee was also my best friend last night – because I haven’t worked any overnight shifts – since I worked in the assisted living down the block a few years ago.

I came home after meeting with my boss – and I knocked out for a few hours.

I laugh because last night at 2 AM, I looked at the clock and realized if I were back in my 20’s – backyard parties would still be going, and I’d be hanging with many friends dancing, laughing, having a great time and now by 10 PM – I’m in bed, reading a book, writing (this is proof) – lol – or listening to music to try to fall asleep.

Still – like I said – I’m grateful for every day and every new year God allows me to see! 🤗

11 PM right now, and I’m going to bed.

I told you!

I shall catch up with all of you tomorrow morning.

Sending so much love and big hugs your way!

💕Shel💕

My first overnight shift at the facility and my weirdest / craziest relationship story.

My first overnight shift at the facility and my weirdest / craziest relationship story.

Shel R.Leave a comment

     “Yes! I’ll come in for you tonight!”.

Those were my words to my Co-worker when she messaged me earlier. She wasn’t feeling well, and asked if I could work for her. She asked if I wanted to trade shifts or if I would just go in – depending on if I needed to stay under a certain amount of hours or not.

I need all the hours I can get right now. So, I told her I’d just take her shift and no trade was needed.

I planned to sleep for a bit.

However – it’s snowing! It seems like it never stops snowing here in Minnesota, and I’m so over it.

We live in the middle of nowhere pretty much and when it gets dark, there’s no street lights to light up your way if you’re driving. That means – when it snows – and the roads are bad – it’s a guessing game of “Am I on the right side of the road?”.

I left our house 3 hours early.

I wanted to sit down and eat dinner with my kids, but I looked outside and the roads were already covered, so I knew if I didn’t leave before it got dark, I’d play that game I hate so much during this weather.

It usually takes me 30 minutes or so – to get to work, but I drove slow, so 45 to the city I work in – was more like it.

I’m currently sitting in a parking lot of a mall writing this. Work is now only 15 minutes away, and if it keeps snowing – at least my drive won’t be so bad because I’m already in the area.

Since I have hours to go before work…let me tell you a story.

I had to laugh earlier because a friend of mine and I – were talking about the weirdest relationships we’ve ever had. 🫩😁 I don’t even know how it came up, but since I have the time and I’m just sitting here before I drive a few blocks down to work – I’ll share mine.

We started talking about her ex-boyfriend and laughed about the weird parts of the times they were together, and then I told her about one of my ex’s – that I’ll call “Aaron”.

She asked what my weirdest / craziest relationship was.

Aaron and I were childhood best friends.

We had known each other since the age of 13, and we were always so close. Back then, he considered himself a “thug”. He considered himself a “gangster”, but back then – I was young and dumb and thought that that was cool.

Ya live and learn, right! 🧐

So, Aaron and I hung out all of the time when he wasn’t with his friends, and when he was doing illegal stuff – he always told me not to come by, or to go home and he’d call me later.

It seemed like he cared about me enough to look out for me, and I loved him for that – as my male best friend. Anytime we were together, he made me laugh a lot and he was always making sure those around us whenever we hung out – respected me.

Aaron made it clear he’d never let anything happen to me.

Still, Aaron was who he was, and I knew it was probably not the best idea to hang out with him as much as I did – because of who he was hanging out with and what he was doing in his life. How do you stop hanging out with someone you have so much fun with though? Someone who supports you and your dreams in life? Who wants the best for you and makes you forget everything when you’re with them?

Again, this guy was my male best friend and we grew up together. However… when I was 18, I had my first child and got married.

Aaron had tried to be with me (in a relationship) all of our teenage years, and I just didn’t see him “in that way”. I wasn’t attracted to Aaron, but I still loved him as one of my close best friends.

He was a really good guy with a big heart for me, but after I had my oldest child and got married, we lost contact. Aaron was upset about me finding someone to spend my life with, and having a kid with someone else – when he wanted it to be (us) all those years.

He used to joke about us getting married and having kids some day, but I finally realized it wasn’t a joke. He was serious and I knew he liked me when we were teenagers, but I didn’t know how serious it was until I got married, had a kid and he stopped talking to me.

Years and years went by, and we didn’t speak.

In 2013, my now ex husband and I – divorced.

I don’t blame either of us. I think we were married young, had kids young, and now that we grew older – we just wanted different things in life and we parted ways as friends.

I posted something on Facebook about the divorce and wishing my ex husband well in life, praying that we both find our happiness, and suddenly – I received a message from Aaron. How long has he been watching my posts or did someone in our friend group tell him I was divorced now? …… Those were my questions. We had a few of the same friends, still.

I was happy to hear from him, and we talked a lot after that first message. We could spend hours on the phone – laughing and talking like no time had passed at all – when in reality – we had years of catching up to do.

He told me about the relationships he’s been in, about his job, the kids he has now, and what he’s been doing in life. I told him the same about me. My divorce. My job. My dreams and goals. My kids, and many other things that we talked about.

He admitted he was upset when I got married and had a kid, but said he never lost feelings for me. He said I didn’t know it – but he checked on me often through friends, or looking at my Social media. It made me smile, but my feelings hadn’t changed and I still didn’t feel the same way he did, so I felt bad.

Still, it was nice having my male best friend back in my life.

He asked if I wanted to meet up and go see a movie and he promised it would be as friends. So, I went.

We went to see a movie, went to get ice cream and just sat in a park and talked for hours. As the days and weeks went by, we hung out more and more and this time – we were adults.

We were both in our early 30’s.

Eventually, we hung out so much, that I decided to try to date Aaron. I thought that my feelings for him could grow – even if they weren’t there romantically at that time. We became a couple and I did my best to give him a fair chance.

We had a lot of good times for the 6 months we were together, and yes – that’s all it was.

One of the few times I still cherish – is when we were at his cousin’s house. We had just gotten there, it was the middle of winter and I had my leather jacket on. When I took it off – I had a tight fuzzy white sweater under it, and black tight pants. He looked me up and down and just said, “Damn! Wow! Damn. That’s all mine!”. ❤️

When his cousin said something about stealing me and not giving me back, Aaron made me laugh when he got back up and said we were leaving, and to put my jacket back on.  (Yes, he was joking!). We had a great time that night and it was one of my favorite memories as we hung out with his cousin and his cousin’s girlfriend – who showed up a few hours later.

Another time I still cherish – is when he lost a close friend of his that he’s known as long as he’s known me. That loss really broke him and he was at his sister’s house for a week – and wouldn’t leave because he was just so depressed and needed someone to be around him – so he wouldn’t think about this friend he lost that much.

His sister was the one who called me and told me I needed to come see her brother because he was in this deep depression and needed something to pick him up. I told her I’d be there, but she didn’t tell him.  As soon as I walked down the stairs to the basement where he was hanging out, his eyes lit up, he smiled so big and he gave me the biggest hug.

Aaron and I – were always there for each other when we needed it the most. As best friends and as a couple when we were together.

Although we had a lot of good times and funny laughs, I slowly noticed that Aaron was still the same guy he was – when we were teenagers, and that life didn’t appeal to me anymore. What I once thought was cool and fun – (his lifestyle and the way he considered himself a thug or gangster) – wasn’t cool or fun anymore.

Being adults now – I thought he changed. I thought his mentality changed, and that he had dreams and goals like I did, but he didn’t.

He was working a part-time job with very little education, and I tried so hard to get him to get a full-time job and do something with his future. To plan something better for himself – rather than still being 30-something and calling himself a thug / gangster.

We weren’t teens anymore and it was no longer cute or acceptable. When I started to realize he still had the same mentality – it was when he kept talking about having enemies and “being from the hood” or “being hood”. A few months into the relationship, I realized this probably wasn’t going to last, and that even though he had met my kids already because he was my childhood male best friend and I trusted him – I knew after I heard him talk about still enjoying that lifestyle – I couldn’t bring my kids around him anymore.

I knew I didn’t want to be involved in that lifestyle and I also knew that I had goals and dreams and he wasn’t even thinking about his future or making it better.

He was happy working his part-time job and being in the streets doing whatever he was doing when he wasn’t at work, or with me.

I wanted to go to college for Criminal justice and make something of my life, and we were totally different and had totally different mentalities when it came to things like that.

Other things started to bother me as well.

He was obsessed with the Illuminati, and who was in it. He used to talk about the Illuminati non-stop and that’s just something I never cared about, but I listened when he talked about it – because he was interested in it and I’m sure that half the things I was into or talked about – he listened because it was me and he just enjoyed hearing me out.

However, every single conversation we had – that had absolutely nothing to do about the Illuminati – ended up leading to a conversation about the Illuminati or the government somehow. Someway. He was also obsessed with the government and watching what they were doing or telling me what he thought they were trying to do.

I found that a little weird or wild.

I had once told him I just tried a new Deli that day for lunch and the sandwiches there were amazing. I told him we’d have to go one day, and he told me I had to be careful with new foods I try because the government puts things in certain foods to kill off half of the population – since earth is getting too crowded.

I looked at him that night like:

WHAT?????

“What the hell are you talking about?”

I remember asking him if we can ever just have a normal conversation that doesn’t lead to anything about the Illuminati or government and what he thinks they’re doing to food, or to our minds, etc.

That turned into an argument because he felt like I didn’t believe him about what was going on in the world. 👀🙄

Things got really weird with him, and then he started getting super jealous over every little thing.

Sometimes, I’d go to his place and wait for him to get off work. I had a key to his place, but there were times the weather was super nice and I’d sit outside with the owner of the building he lived in, and some of the other females who lived in the building – that I had gotten to know.

Aaron would come home, see me outside and accuse me of wanting their boyfriends or husbands to see me, or other guys passing by – to see me and talk to me, but whenever he came home – I’d only ever be talking to the women I knew there.

I remember one time when Aaron made a comment about me being outside and one of the older women told him, “Leave that baby alone! All she does is sit here, talk to us, and wait for you or she’s inside cooking for you – for when you get home! That baby ain’t over here talking to nobody’s boyfriend, husband or any other man. Stop accusing her of all that nonsense!”.

One day, he told me I shouldn’t be outside – unless it’s with him. I just laughed and told him if he wanted to control something – buy a puppy because he wasn’t controlling me.

That led to an argument.

I had never seen or experienced Aaron act that way – in all the many years I knew him, so it was all weird to me.

You know that song by Justin Bieber that goes, “My mama don’t like you, and she likes everyone?”.

I brought him home to meet my parents one time and my dad just looked at me and shook his head. My mom was disappointed and while she was very polite to him, I knew she didn’t like him, and she did like everyone. My mom was the sweetest woman, and you had to do something really bad – for her not to like you, so when I knew she didn’t like Aaron the first time she met him, I also couldn’t question why.

She could tell just by looking at him – what he was into and the lifestyle he led.

We had a fight that night as well because he wanted to wear a hoodie, a bandana hanging out of his back pocket, baggy pants and a hat to meet my parents and when I asked him to change – he accused me of not loving him for who he is.

Eventually, I knew I had to tell Aaron it wasn’t going to work out. The feelings I thought would grow for him – weren’t. I wasn’t interested in his lifestyle or that mentality he still had in his 30’s – that was the same as when we were teens. He had no motivation or plans for his life, and our conversations were more about his fears, thoughts and opinions on the Illuminati and government – even when I tried to bring up other subjects.

Again, I think the biggest deal breaker – was knowing I didn’t feel comfortable bringing my kids around him an

One day – after 6 months together – he asked me to change my relationship status on Facebook – from “In a relationship” – to “Engaged”. I told him I wasn’t going to do that because we weren’t engaged, and people were going to want to see a ring or want to know how he proposed.

That was yet – another argument.

He accused me of not wanting other guys to think we were serious.

We ended up going to see a movie that night after our argument and I told him we had to talk when we got back to his place later. He just wanted to go enjoy a movie and avoid talking for that moment, so we went.

We ended up walking around the mall because the movie theater was upstairs and we had an hour to kill after we got our tickets.

As we were headed back upstairs an hour later, he pulled me into a “Kay’s” jewelry store.

🎵 Every kiss begins with Kay 🎵

Yep. That one. lol

He said there were always previews before a movie starts, so he wanted to just have fun. He asked me, “If you had to pick out an engagement ring today, which one would you want?”. I was confused, but I also knew that I wanted to get married again someday – (just not to him). So, I decided to play his little game and just have fun and try on engagement rings.

He had a part-time job and he was paying his rent and bills, so I figured there was no way he could even afford an engagement ring, which made me feel confident that he just had the thought of proposing in his head and I’d talk to him later about just being friends.

I tried on a few different rings and finally held my hand out when I found the perfect one that shined so pretty when I held it up. I love the square kind, and I found the one I’d love – if – I was IN LOVE and wanted to get married, but I wasn’t in love. So, I told Aaron that would be the one I want – if I had to pick, and I handed the ring back to the jewelry guy – thanking him for letting me try on a few.

I then told Aaron we had to head upstairs to the movie before we missed the beginning, and I started to walk out of the jewelry store.

When I heard him say, “We’ll take it!”, my heart dropped. I asked what he was doing. I asked where he got the money. He didn’t answer me. I told him not to do this, and he did. He paid the thousands in cash, and I didn’t even want to know how he was able to drop that much all at one time.

He didn’t even get down on one knee or propose in any romantic way. He slid it on my finger and told me, “There! Now we’re engaged and you can change your Facebook status”.

No! That’s not how it works!

I didn’t make a big fuss about that moment at that time because I didn’t want to argue with him in a mall full of people, but as soon as we got back to his place…. we got into an argument because he called me ungrateful, disrespectful and mean.

I didn’t seem happy about the ring – he said.

I made him look stupid in front of the jewelry guy because I didn’t get all excited and at least give him a hug – he said. 

He felt like I didn’t even want the ring, and truth be told – I didn’t. I told him to keep the receipt in case something happens (when we were still at the store).

So, at his place – I already knew I was ending things, and I asked him to sit down, so we could talk. He had been drinking that night and I explained to him how much I love him and care about him as one of my best male friends all these years. How much I’ve appreciated all the times he made me laugh, was there for me or looked out for me and he knew I had done the same for him – for years.

But….I told him our lives are on two totally different paths, and that it wasn’t going to work out for us. I said I would love to continue to be friends and I don’t regret trying to be more, but that there were so many fights over stupid things, and my goals and his didn’t match up.

I tried my hardest to let him know I’d always be there for him as a friend and I didn’t want our friendship to be over, but that I totally understand if he didn’t want to be friends anymore.

He asked if it was because he believes in the extraterrestrial and the government – poisoning us.

See how weird things got???

Still, I cared very much about Aaron, and maybe he could find a woman more like him.

That night, he asked for the ring back because he said I clearly didn’t care about it. I handed it back to him, and before I could stop him – he threw it down the toilet and flushed it. He told me that’s what I think about his gift.

The next morning – I went to go get some of my things that I left at his place and told him I’d be back in a week for the rest. He asked me where the ring was and he didn’t believe me when I told him he flushed it the night before – because he was drinking and didn’t remember the night before.

A few weeks earlier – I had saved a good amount of money from work and went shopping for new clothes and shoes for myself. I had everything packed into a bag and was ready to pick it up the following week, but the following week – Aaron kept making excuses for why I couldn’t come by and get it.

Turns out – he threw all my new clothes and shoes away, and he didn’t want to admit it. He felt bad. He said he was angry about the ring, so he wanted to feel like my money was wasted as well.

We didn’t talk for an entire two years after that, but I was surprised one day when he contacted me on Facebook, apologized for everything, understood why I ended things with him, and offered to pay me for the shoes and clothes he threw out that I purchased myself.

I felt bad about the ring incident, so I told him I didn’t want anything from him – that I was sorry if he felt like I wasted his time in any way, and that I will forever remember him as one of my best friends.

And …..that was that.

I never spoke to him again.

I still laugh when I say he’s one of the weirdest relationships I ever had, but I smile when I think about the friendship we had at one point – as well.

Wherever Aaron is today – I just hope he’s doing well, he’s happy and life is kind to him. 💚

SO, when this friend of mine today – told me about her weirdest / craziest relationship and I told her about Aaron – we had a good giggle, but we also both said we hope our previous boyfriends are doing okay.

   I wish for nothing but the best for them.

Also, I just hope Aaron realized he’s worth so much more than what he was doing with himself in life. I have met some of the sweetest gangsters and thugs – but it’s a scary life and sometimes – you should want more for yourself.

As for his addiction to the aliens, the government and Illuminati – I pray he finds a woman who loves the same theories, stories, research, etc. 😁

I’m sorry (but also not sorry) that I couldn’t be that one for him.

    Anyway……

With another hour to go before I have to head towards work – I’m going to sit here and watch Tiktoks.

My loves – pray I stay awake all night because I’m going to be so tired, and I have to rush home in the morning to get the kids to school, go home and shower and then meet up with my boss at 11 AM for a meeting. 😴

      Xoxo.

      ❤️Shel❤️